Frigidity in women: what it is, how to treat it, how to increase libido

What is female frigidity, what causes it, how long does it last and how does it manifest itself? What are the dangers of refusing sex for a woman’s health, what problems can arise in the family due to sexual dissatisfaction? Is it possible to recover from frigidity and regain the ability to enjoy sex? We honestly and frankly discussed this topic in a conversation with the Chief Medical Doctor, psychiatrist, psychiatrist-narcologist and psychotherapist Vladislav Sipovich.

General information

Sexual dysfunction is a condition that negatively affects a person’s quality of life and psychological state. At the same time, according to experts, such disorders are recorded much more often among representatives of the fair sex. If erectile dysfunction in men is the problem with which they most often seek help, then women, as a rule, hide the presence of such disorders.
The result is sexual dissatisfaction, leading to psychological and physiological problems. Speaking about frigidity in women - what it is, it should be noted that this term indicates a decrease in libido and interest in sex. The meaning of the word (derived from the Latin word “cold”) explains the essence of this term: frigidity is sexual coldness in girls and women. Even in the most frank moments, such women may not experience arousal. As a result, the lack of sexual desire in women leads to pain during and after sexual intercourse. When describing this condition, experts also use the terms hypolibidemia and anaphrodisia .

More information about what such a disorder means, how to overcome this problem, and also about whether it is advisable to talk about frigidity in men will be discussed in this article.

Myths and truth about female frigidity2

Nowadays, where liberation and free conversations on sexual topics reign, many do not realize what problems some women face. Many men even consider such girls inferior, and some come up with all sorts of myths about frigidity. Here are some of them:

Men are to blame for everything. Most women, without delving into the essence of the problem, begin to blame the man who is nearby for frigidity. In their opinion, they experience sexual aversion because their partner pays little attention, is not attractive enough, does not feel women’s needs, or is generally bad in bed. But the problem lies much deeper - in perception. And here the psychological component is important, which influenced the reasons for such female perception.
This is a terrible disease. Indeed, sometimes the problem lies precisely in women’s health and psychological state. But, also, the cause of frigidity can be a woman’s strict upbringing, which at a young age discouraged any desire for contact with men. Such problems can arise in girls from religious families or in girls who were raised by conservative adults.
Frigid women are flawed. But if you look from the other side, these girls are even more complete than the non-frigid ones. Girls who do not have “animal” needs are much more likely to achieve success in life, since they are not distracted by unnecessary worries and are ready to devote themselves to the work of their whole lives.
This disease is incurable. This condition is treatable, and sometimes women cope with the disease on their own when a caring and attractive partner appears nearby. Sometimes, you need to see a psychologist or a women's doctor. But the bottom line is the same: you shouldn’t give up on yourself if you feel frigid.

Frigid women cannot have children. Doctors have proven the opposite. Considering that these women do not have a lot of sexual intercourse, and accordingly, they have less risk of having diseases of the genitourinary system. According to statistics, frigid women who decided to have a child carried the baby without problems and easily survived the birth process. Many girls noticed that after giving birth, they practically stopped being frigid and began to experience sexual arousal towards their partner.

Pathogenesis

In some cases, sexual coldness is caused physically, in others it is a sexual disorder. In this case, the body's reactions may be different. an orgasm during sexual intercourse , although they experience pleasant sensations. This condition is usually associated with delayed psychosexual development. Another part is indifferent to sexual intercourse and does not experience pleasant feelings. Such manifestations can be caused by overwork, mental illness, alcohol abuse, etc. The third category of women has aversion and hostility to sexual contact. In this case we are talking about the inhibition of sexual functions by psychological factors.

Classification

As noted above, there are three degrees of manifestation of frigidity.

First , during sexual intercourse, arousal is noted, but orgasm does not occur.
The second is complete indifference to sexual contact.
Third , there is a pronounced hostility and even aversion to sexual contact.

There are also several types of this condition depending on the reasons for its origin:

Constitutional frigidity - sexual coldness is associated with the characteristics of a woman’s anatomy.
Withdrawal – decreased libido is associated with prolonged abstinence from sexual intercourse.
Symptomatic – a consequence of chronic somatic diseases, in particular diabetes mellitus , cardiovascular disorders, etc.
Postpartum is a consequence of physiological and anatomical changes in the female body after the birth of a child, as well as psycho-emotional exhaustion.
Retardation is a consequence of the immaturity of the reproductive system. It is observed when the hormonal background is unformed, as well as in the absence of sexual experience.
Emotional – associated with a negative emotional background. As a rule, it is situational.
Psychogenic - develops after severe shocks, while a woman, as a rule, has a pronounced aversion to sex. Most often it occurs in women who have suffered sexual violence or aggression from a partner.
Nymphomaniac is a condition in which desire and fantasies persist, but a woman cannot achieve orgasm during sex.

Primary and secondary frigidity are also distinguished

Primary – develops as a result of physical and emotional unpreparedness for sexual intercourse. Often observed in young girls. When having sexual intercourse “out of curiosity,” expectations often do not coincide with reality. As a result, attitudes towards sex may become distorted.
Secondary - this condition can be associated with sexual diseases, mental and endocrine disorders, neoplasms, brain diseases, etc.

How to discourage a man from wanting sex

Don't let your partner cum for a couple of days. Like, then the orgasm will be brighter. Will not be. Because, firstly, he is in pain. Secondly, it is fraught with serious diseases. Orgasm can be delayed during one sexual act, but it cannot be completely ruled out;
Doing what you think is necessary in bed, regardless of your partner’s wishes. What if it hurts him or just doesn’t like it? Then sex for the poor man will turn into torture;
Simulate a violent orgasm, regardless of what the process of sex itself was like, and at the same time squeal something like: “Well, eat me, my tiger!” It is forbidden. Won't eat it. He will only get scared and the excitement will be over;
During sexual intercourse, swear like a drunken cobbler. In fact, many men find it arousing if done naturally. And when a muslin young lady tries to do this falsely, the man no longer wants anything.

Causes of frigidity

When discussing the reasons for the lack of sexual desire in women, it should be noted that they are all divided into two categories - psychological and physiological .

The following factors are classified as psychological:

Prolonged stress, constant fatigue and overload.
An episode of sexual violence that has occurred one or more times. This is especially noticeable on libido if violence accompanied the first sexual experience.
Fear of unplanned pregnancy - this feeling does not allow a woman to relax.
Negative attitude or disgust shown by a partner.
Coldness and lack of emotions in the family in which the girl grew up.
Depressive state , increased anxiety .

A number of physiological factors that provoke frigidity are also determined:

Injuries to the genital organs that lead to damage to nerve endings.
Injuries to the vaginal walls after childbirth , which leads to lack of desire. Also, during the period after the birth of a baby and lactation, there is a natural decrease in libido . However, this is a reversible condition and in most cases everything returns to normal after a few months.
Pathologies in the development of the genital organs.
Physical pathologies - multiple sclerosis , headaches, arthritis , etc.
Taking certain medications: antidepressants, antihistamines, some drugs against hypertension chemotherapy drugs , etc.
Hormonal imbalance during menopause . At this time, due to a decrease in estrogen , the elasticity of the vagina deteriorates, pain appears during sexual intercourse, which becomes an obstacle to achieving orgasm.

How to get rid of frigidity

Despite the availability of information on this topic, most often women and men are in no hurry to seek help. The longer the condition remains without medical control, the more severe it becomes. And if frigidity was caused by a physiological reason, a psychological one will also appear, since a person begins to consider himself different from everyone else, close himself off from the attention of the opposite sex, or lie to his partner.

It is necessary to get rid of sexual dysfunction when it causes discomfort in a woman’s life and brings with it physiological consequences and hormonal imbalances. If the lack of libido does not affect health and family in any way, then frigidity is attributed to the psychological individual characteristics of a person.

Disposal is carried out in several ways:

drug treatment;
therapy with a psychologist or psychotherapist;
neurosurgical intervention.

The appointment is given by a sexologist after identifying the signs, degree of frigidity and the reasons for its occurrence.

Drug treatment

It is prescribed when the cause of frigidity is hormonal imbalance, the manifestation of organ diseases, or psychological trauma.

Recommended to take:

Hormonal drugs. The deviation is caused by a decrease to a minimum level of female or male sex hormones and disturbances in the functioning of the thyroid gland. In this case, the patient is prescribed drugs of the androgenic group or estrogen-containing drugs.
Drugs that improve blood flow, creating a rush of blood to the pelvic organs. Prescribed when a patient has a physiological problem, poor blood flow to the reproductive organs, dysfunction of nerve endings. Vasoactive drugs have different properties; the choice of specific treatment depends on the cause that led to damage to the nervous system.
Sedatives, antidepressants. They help cope with nervous tension, return to life after psychological trauma, calm the nervous system, and relieve panic attacks.

Drugs of these groups are not prescribed independently; a prescription and medical consultation are required.

Neurosurgical treatment

Frigidity is a dysfunction that manifests itself after injuries to the nerve endings in the genitals. It is not always possible to restore sensitivity with medications and surgery is required. The operation is carried out in a hospital, the doctor removes tumors, anomalies, scars, skin folds that interfere with a full sexual life and restores damaged tissue, leading to a normal state.

Psycho-emotional therapy

Frigidity arises as a consequence of psychological trauma or as a deviation caused by interference in the patient’s personal life. Long-term therapy is carried out with a psychologist, in severe cases with a psychotherapist with the participation of medications.

A psychotherapist can help resolve psychological problems.

In the case where the patient’s partner negatively influences the treatment, and perhaps his actions led to the current situation, therapy is required for both, otherwise there will be no treatment result.

The same applies to the consequences of psychological trauma. If the one who provoked the situation (for example, a rapist) is constantly nearby or present in a woman’s life, humiliates her, reminds her of what happened, she needs to get rid of it. You can move, completely isolate yourself from the source of the trauma, stop all communication, remove all reminders from your life. The same applies to those girls whose environment does not accept female sexuality for religious reasons. It is required to leave this group of people, stop contacts on the topic of personal life, leave exclusively formal communication if there are obligations. Only in this case will therapy with a psychologist bear fruit.

Symptoms

True frigidity is characterized by a complete lack of interest in sexual life. Therefore, a temporary lack of interest in sexual activity, associated with the influence of certain factors, does not indicate complete frigidity. Very often, it is enough for a woman to consult with a qualified specialist who will help her understand everything and correct the problems.

It is noteworthy that signs of frigidity may remain invisible to a woman, and they are often initially noticed by a partner. The following signs are typical for this condition:

Sexual desire either disappears completely or appears very rarely. Even if there is attraction to a person, there is no arousal.
Sexual contact is perceived as an unpleasant duty, and the partner’s desire to talk about this topic provokes irritation.
If sexual contact does occur, then the body does not react to the process physically - lubricant is not released, arousal does not occur. There are also no emotions and no orgasm.
Before, during and after sexual intercourse, pain may be experienced in the genital area and anus.
After sexual intercourse, irritation, disappointment and other unpleasant feelings are noted.

Preparing to visit the doctor

After the partner understands his problem, he has a question: how to get rid of frigidity? Specialists from JSC “Medicine” (clinic of Academician Roitberg) will help you understand your own problems.

Before visiting a sex psychologist, the patient can be examined by a gynecologist or urologist-andrologist. You should take a shower and don’t forget to bring a diaper and clean socks.

No special preparation is required for a meeting with a sexologist, except that you should be prepared to openly discuss your problems. JSC “Medicine” (academician Roitberg’s clinic) keeps data about each patient confidential.

Women can ask:

sexual life in the postpartum period;
lack of orgasm;
changes in orientation in adulthood;
Couples counseling is open.

Tests and diagnostics

When conducting a diagnosis, the doctor asks the patient in detail about her feelings, both physiological and emotional. If there is pain and discomfort in the genital area, the woman must be examined by a gynecologist, who determines the presence or absence of physiological pathologies. If necessary, the necessary studies may be prescribed.

A series of conversations with a sexologist or psychologist will help identify psychological problems. It is very important that an experienced specialist not only confirm the diagnosis, but also determine the cause of this condition.

Ways to combat female frigidity6

Treatment methods directly depend on the causes of frigidity. For example, in case of psychological disorders, you should contact a female psychologist, with whom you can understand in detail the causes of such an illness and together develop a treatment regimen. This process can take a long time, since not all women are ready to share their problem and talk about it. However, only a professional can help get your sex life back on track.

In addition, there are many other methods, for example:

Treatment with traditional methods. Various tinctures of calendula, golden root, pink currant radiola, black currant, sea buckthorn, oregano, lemon balm, motherwort, ginseng, chamomile, nettle, St. John's wort, rose hips and so on will have the best effect on women's health. Frigidity is not only a modern disease. After all, it’s not in vain that our grandmothers compiled folk recipes to combat this disease.
Therapeutic exercise and massages. This will not only have a positive effect on the woman’s overall health, but will also improve her mood. And as you know, good sex largely depends on a positive attitude.
Aromatherapy. Essential oils are known to help treat many problems. The best help is sage, bergamot, mint, geranium - in addition to the positive effect on the body, these aromatic oils relieve stress.
Appointment with an experienced gynecologist. Only visiting an experienced doctor will help completely eradicate the problem.

Treatment with folk remedies

Some folk remedies are also used to increase sexual desire. However, such methods are auxiliary, and it is advisable to use them only after the approval of a doctor.

Medicinal tea . It is necessary to mix dry chamomile, nettle and rose hips in equal proportions. 2 tbsp. l. Pour 300 ml of water into this mixture and boil for several minutes. Strain and drink throughout the day.
Drink with spices . Add 4 cloves, a little chili pepper and nutmeg to 200 ml of milk. Boil, strain, add a little honey and drink throughout the day. Take every day for at least two weeks.
Anise tincture . Pour 50 g of anise seeds into 200 ml of cognac and leave for two weeks. Drink 1 tbsp. l. a day before meals. The course of treatment is at least 3 months.
Dried fruits . Mix figs, prunes, dried apricots, dates, walnuts, almonds in equal proportions, chop everything and add a little honey. Take 1 tbsp twice a day. l.
Tea with ginger . Grind 50 ml of ginger, pour 1 liter of boiling water and leave in a thermos for several hours. It is recommended to consume this drink with honeycombs. In this case, the wax should be chewed for a long time, but not consumed orally.
Cinnamon . It is recommended to add it to your morning coffee. This coffee should be drunk with dark chocolate.
Massage with aromatic oils . Patchouli, ylang-ylang, and sandalwood oils are suitable for massage. It is advisable that such a massage be performed by a loved one - this way the woman can relax as much as possible.
Oriental dances and yoga . These activities provide an opportunity to relax and explore sexuality.

Prevention

To avoid problems with sexual desire, you must adhere to the following recommendations:

Visit your gynecologist regularly to prevent the development of chronic diseases. Preventive examinations by specialists of other profiles are also important.
Build the most trusting relationship with your partner, discuss with him your feelings, preferences and problems that have arisen.
Do not practice sexual contact if it happens “through force”, without desire. If this happens constantly, a woman may eventually develop aversion to sex in general or to a loved one.
Learn to relax, have a good rest, and avoid stressful situations.

During pregnancy

So-called temporary frigidity can be observed in a woman during pregnancy and after childbirth. During this period, significant hormonal changes occur in the body of the expectant mother. In addition, she is psychologically tuned specifically to procreation, so sometimes this also affects libido. However, this phenomenon is reversible, and a few months after childbirth, normal sexual desire is gradually restored.

Diet

Diet for hormonal imbalance in women

Efficacy: therapeutic effect after 3 weeks
Timing: constantly
Cost of products: 1400-1500 rubles per week

The diet should be varied and rich in all the minerals and elements necessary for women’s health. To enhance sexual desire, nutritionists recommend introducing into the menu some foods and dishes that have aphrodisiac properties. It is recommended to include in the diet more often:

red meat;
fish and seafood (oysters, shrimp, etc.);
eggs;
spices and herbs;
bitter chocolate;
bananas;
vegetables and herbs (parsley, celery, avocado);
red wine in small quantities.

Consequences and complications

If sexual life causes discomfort, there is no sexual desire, and everything related to the intimate side of life causes negative emotions, then over time a woman may develop a depressive state. Frigidity can also lead to the development of other psychological problems.

If we are talking about physiological reasons, then this condition can subsequently lead to infertility and diseases of the reproductive system.

How to sign up for a sexologist?

You can make an appointment with a sexologist by filling out a simple form on the website or by calling the 24-hour number.

We are located in the Central Administrative District of Moscow, not far from Mayakovskaya metro station, Belorusskaya metro station, Novoslobodskaya metro station, Tverskaya metro station, Chekhovskaya metro station.

With us you can undergo consultation and diagnosis of various diseases. Our doctors are true professionals in their field who are focused on the results of working together with the patient. If you have any questions, you can ask them to a call center employee by phone.