MYTH ABOUT 21 DAYS. Or how long does it take to build habit #579


Habits and their features

What is a habit? This is a matter that has been transferred from the category of conscious to automatic and built-in. This is something that previously required thought when doing it, but has now become an “autopilot” category.

The simplest example is food. When a baby is taught to use a fork, spoon, plate and mug, he thinks about all his movements before each action. What about an adult? He just eats, just drinks, just uses utensils. And he certainly doesn’t think about how to place the fork between the fingers of his hand.

Automatic responses indicate the built-in nature of a habit. And it is “autopilot” that is the goal of developing each new property.

What you need to get rid of (bad habits)

What are the habits? Good and bad. And it is highly advisable to get rid of the latter. The task is not easy, but it is quite doable.

Thinking about what habits there are that are useful to get rid of, the following come to mind:

  • alcohol abuse,
  • smoking,
  • excessive consumption of coffee, tea,
  • “eating” stress,
  • constant soul-searching, which results in pangs of conscience and feelings of guilt.

In some ways, even a bad mood or chronic lack of sleep is nothing more than the result of wrong habits that also need to be eliminated from your life.

The same environment should still prompt action, but in accordance with a different scenario. At first you will have to look after yourself and control your own impulses. Then this will begin to happen by itself.

Thus, negative habits are replaced with positive ones. And the more often you do the right thing, the more firmly new, useful skills will be established and the better your life will become.

According to the mechanism of education, habits are closely related to skills. Habit is the need to perform actions. For example, a child has mastered some hygiene skills: he knows how to wash his hands and brush his teeth. However, this is not enough

It is important that your child develops the habit of always washing his hands before eating, before going to bed, and after a walk. Habit motivates a person to act in a certain way

This is why habits are of utmost importance in developing positive personality traits. A. S. Makarenko noted that it is necessary to cultivate the correct habits of behavior. When a habit has been developed, we act this way because we cannot do otherwise, because we are used to it. Makarenko notes that it is much more difficult to cultivate behavioral habits than to cultivate awareness of how to behave.

If a skill, as a rule, is formed through conscious exercise, then a habit can be formed without much effort on the part of the person. A strict daily routine, the example of others, repeated repetition of the same actions lead to the fact that, unbeknownst to oneself, a person develops positive or negative habits.

A skill allows you to perform an action masterfully, but it does not stimulate the execution of the action itself. Habits, unlike skills, require action. Therefore, in behavior they are either useful or harmful. This is why habits are part of the moral foundation of the individual.

Habits arise in a child in the process of operating with objects, as a result of expanding his circle of contacts with people.

It is important that the child immediately develops useful habits that have a positive impact on the personality. An ancient Indian proverb says: “If you sow an action, you will reap a habit; if you sow a habit, you will reap a character; if you sow a character, you will reap a destiny.”

Among the habits associated with work, it is necessary to note the useful habit of filling your time with fruitful work and reasonable rest. This idea was persistently emphasized by K. D. Ushinsky: “What is most necessary is that it becomes impossible for the pupil to spend time as a lackey, when a person is left without work in his hands, without a thought in his head, because at these moments the head, heart and morality deteriorate.” .

Thus, skills and habits represent the foundation of individual behavior. Character traits and professional skill are formed on the basis of skills and habits. Well-developed skills and useful habits enable a person to quickly master new educational material and new types of professional activities.

Rare habits are something that almost every average person can find in themselves! And many people prefer not to see this as a problem and simply do not notice their own harmful addictions. You can often hear the excuse: “I have everything under control, this is not a bad habit at all, but a momentary weakness.” In fact, a person often doesn’t even realize how much negativity bad habits bring into his life and how good it will be if he gets rid of them. In this article, let's look at the most common types of bad habits and try to figure out what can be done to get rid of them.

Duration of habit implementation

Many works have been written on how to quickly introduce a habit into the subconscious. They differ in schemes, recommendations, advice, but are united in one thing.

One habit is developed in 21 days.

Or better yet, one per month.

Perfectionism in this matter is absolutely inappropriate, so you shouldn’t “start implementing all the desired healthy habits on Monday and become a new person.” It still won't work. But disappointment in yourself will come, uncertainty will be added, and maybe even a feeling of being labeled a loser.

Is it necessary?

Of course not.

Let's just do the math.

If you take a month to implement one habit, then in a year you will get 12 of them.

12!!!

In two years - 24.

In three - 36.

A person with 20+ new useful habits is a completely different personality.

It turns out that in a year or two or three, from a dull amoeba with a beer belly and dull eyes, you can model a successful, self-confident businessman (?), an athlete (?), a family man (?) who is happy every day and is surrounded by friends.

The Habitual Fiasco: New Year's Resolutions

Every year, millions of people make New Year's resolutions with the best of intentions, but less than five percent keep them. In reality, a New Year's resolution is nothing more than a desire to include a healthy habit (like morning exercises or waking up early) or eliminate a bad one (such as smoking or addicting to fast food) into your life. I think to prove to you that when it comes to keeping New Year's resolutions, most people give up on them by the end of January, there is no point in even citing statistics.

It is quite possible that many of you have observed this phenomenon, so to speak, personally. For example, if you've ever visited the gym during the first week of January, you know how difficult it can be to find parking during that time. The parking lot is literally full of cars that belong to people with the best intentions; These people, armed with New Year's resolutions, are determined to lose weight and get back in shape this year. But if you return to the gym at the end of the month, you will find the parking lot half empty. Without a proven strategy to systematically reinforce new good habits, most people fail.

Why is it so difficult to develop and maintain the habits necessary to be happy, healthy and successful?

How to change habits

So, it takes 21 days to form a habit...

But how exactly does this process happen?

Most often through overcoming oneself. Our brain, organism, body love comfort, peace and are very concerned about physical happiness. All these ideas of achievement and success are far from them.

Therefore, you can change a habit in 21 days only with the mindset of a successful outcome and result...

...and systematic hard work in the right direction all the days...

...and to understand the stages of formation of each new behavioral element.

The last point is the most important, because sabotage from the brain and body will occur almost daily.

But everything is simple here! The main thing is to endure 21 days until a strong neural connection is formed, and the habit will become an inseparable property of the new life.

Useful tips for acquiring a new habit

You need to prepare in all areas of your life that are significant to you and introduce one or two new habits there.

Disassemble your “Augean stables”, rubble with unnecessary things, books, papers. Bring order everywhere. And at the same time, look at what new habits you need to start instilling.

Keep a Gratitude Diary, also for 21 days initially. Write down your small victories there. Then you will have more and more of them, as you learn to notice the good.

Stop complaining about life and learn to better learn something new and interesting for yourself every day, expand your horizons.

Make your budget and write down all your expenses there. This will allow you to maintain a “conscious spending regime” and avoid stress from lack of money.

Value your time, count it and don’t waste it. This is the most valuable resource.

Introduce “healthy habits” and start playing some kind of sport. It is very conducive to developing a new habit in any area.

Evaluate your reality from a positive point of view, even if there was some kind of “failure”, then accept it as an experience.

Remember that any difficult road always begins with the first step. So do it and be sure to move forward. It's worth it.

People who have conscious, regular and consistent habits are more successful. The foundation of all habits is discipline. Try it, you will succeed and in just 21 days you will form useful habits and change your life for the better!

Test yourself with our set of online appearance calculators.

Stages of Habit Formation

There are three of them in total.

If we use as an axiom “it takes 21 days to form a habit,” then it is clear: every week you need to expect some kind of surprise. But which one?

21 days is a suspended sentence. Therefore, we take a month and allocate 7-10 days for each stage. No need to wait for magic after a week. This is unreasonable.

Stage 1. Physical discomfort

The first days after the decision to introduce something new in life are spent in euphoria. Two days!

Then a very tough internal struggle begins.

Kickbacks are in the mood.

Bad feeling.

And a constant inner voice: “Why is this necessary?!”

Well, really! We lived for 20-30, or even 40 years in a comfortable environment. And again. Get up at 5. Run in the morning. Drink water. Eat healthy food. Go to the gym. Learn English.

Everyone has their own list.

So here it is. There is no need to succumb to provocations. We decided so we decided.

We get up, run, drink, eat, study and teach no matter what.

Of course, if the rollback is very strong - significant physical illness (temperature 40, etc.), then it is worth suspending the process. But not in the “I’m a loser” format, but from the position of “now we’ll normalize everything and continue.”

Having overcome physical discomfort, we meet the second enemy.

Stage 2. Emotional “beliefs”

If you have firmly decided to build a new habit in 21 days, it is unwise to retreat now. Moreover, the most difficult stage is left behind.

Although... how to say.

Over the next 7-10 days of establishing new rules, you will have to fight the internal “whiner”. He will convince you that this is all:

  • Boring
  • Unreasonable
  • Wrong
  • Tired of it
  • Can be postponed until tomorrow
  • Need to take a break

In short, enough already!

You should not give in to the persuasion of the pessimistic part of your personality!

We stand our ground and do what we decide.

Stage 3. False success

Most often they quit at this step. One week until victory. Why?

Because the body, which has failed to convince it with physical influences and emotional persuasion, gives a feeling of false success.

The internal dialogue proceeds in the spirit of the biblical serpent and tempter:

  • You're doing great, you've already lost weight - that's enough for now...
  • You’ve been getting up at 5 am for 2 weeks now, it’s ideal - you can rest...
  • 100 words of English in your arsenal, cool - read a book today...

That is, internal argumentation comes from a positive perspective, but is aimed at stopping the experiment on oneself.

You just have to get over this too.

If all stages are completed successfully, a certain action has been consistently worked out for 21-30 days, then the habit will be introduced.

You can move on to the next one.

Big request! Don't get hung up on numbers. The “21 days – develop habits” rule is working, but not a verified canon. All people are different. And if specifically you need 25 days to calmly automate the selected action, then let it be 25 days.

And remember: 1 year – 12 habits, 2 years – 24. With 20+ habits, a new and very cool person appears!

Interesting read:

Rules for success in life and business: 12 secrets of successful people
How to reprogram your brain for positivity and luck: the secrets of positive thinking
Life according to your hand: techniques for self-development and achieving goals

How long does it take to form a habit?

Do you want numbers? I have them. Even several, to choose from. Meet some, maybe you'll like some of them:

A habit is formed in 21 days.

Perhaps the most popular and most attractive thesis. Only the lazy one didn’t inquire where it came from. Let's recall both sources:

  • American plastic surgeon Maxwell Maltz noted that after surgery (including amputation), patients need at least three weeks to get used to their new appearance. The doctor described his observation in the book “Psychocybernetics”. The book became a bestseller, this observation was stolen by all and sundry. True, they lost the word “minimum” and replaced the word “observation” with the word “experiment”. Thus, a myth arose that the experiment showed that a habit is formed in 21 days.
  • In one NASA experiment, subjects wore glasses with lenses that reversed images around the clock. It turned out that over time their brains got used to the lenses and turned the image back on its own. For most, this happened on the 20-21st day. Everything would be fine, but this fact has a couple of nuances. Firstly, the subjects wore glasses constantly (and not just a few minutes a day), that is, in terms of hours, their habit was formed for approximately 300 hours! Secondly, this experiment was carried out repeatedly by other people and the results were different, from 8 to 30 days. And thirdly, gentlemen, you must agree that comparing the forced adaptation of the brain to an inverted picture or to a new appearance is far from the same as developing a habit where you need to make a volitional effort.
  • It takes an average of 66 days to form a habit.
  • Another popular link to experiments for those who like to stick to numbers. In 2009, British scientists led by Dr. Philippa Lally observed 96 volunteers who worked to form one or another useful habit. Oddly enough, for a new behavior to become automatic, different people required different types of habits (some people drink water before breakfast, others go for a run) - from 18 to 254 days. Based on the results of the experiment, scientists wrote a detailed report and summarized: on average, it takes about 66 days to develop a habit. Somehow this conclusion is associated with the “average temperature in the hospital”...

    Forming a sustainable habit requires at least 90 days.

    And it all started so nicely! And then – a sickle to the heart – 90+ days! In terms of? How? Where? Give us back sweet lies in 21 days! Everyone believes what they want to believe... so for those who like to savor it, we will describe this method briefly. And who is interested in going into details, look for him under the call sign “rule 21-40-90”. According to it, the process of habit formation is conditionally divided into 6 stages:

    1 – starting position. Here, against the background of resistance to change, awareness of the problem comes.

    Stages 2 and 3 – last from 1-7 days to 14-20 days. Thinking about how to solve a problem, for example, getting rid of a bad one or starting a useful habit. Searching for reasons, motivations, preparing for the start of practice.

    Stage 4 – lasts about 40-50 days. Actually, practice: a person makes a volitional effort to perform an action (be it drinking water before breakfast or holding back so as not to smoke).

    5 – lasts 15-30 days. Maintaining changes to achieve sustainable results. Often, a habit has already been formed, but it is not worth letting it go “free swimming” just yet. It is useful to look back, analyze what changes the new behavior brought, how automated it became, and how difficult it was.

    Stage 6 – begins from the 75-90th day from the start of the second stage. This stage involves consolidating and maintaining the result. Continue to monitor the regularity of performing actions and periodically reward yourself for it.

    21 day weaning rule

    There is, as a rule, an addiction rule and a withdrawal rule within 21 days. The 21-day rule also applies to breaking any habit. Again, this has been verified experimentally.

    This experiment was mentioned above. Scientists found twenty volunteers who wore special glasses. These glasses turned the image upside down. It took about 21 days to get used to such a vision; it is interesting that after that people began to see everything in reality upside down. To break the habit of this habit, I had to wait 21 days again. Therefore, it was concluded that the rule also applies in reverse.

    Techniques for strengthening a habit (besides repeating it constantly)

    So that you do not rely only on willpower and so that the habits really stick, we suggest using this scheme.

    • The first step towards a habit. Decide on a goal. Yes, you need to think carefully here. For example, the goal “to lose weight” doesn’t sound very specific, right? Why do you need to lose weight? To feel beautiful? And if you find a person who weighs as much as you want - does he feel beautiful? Don't be afraid to dig into your desires.
    • Create a trigger that will remind you of the habit. For example, if after waking up you want to start exercising, set a melody on your alarm clock that will remind you of this. Or, instead of a trigger, create an entire environment that encourages you to develop habits: for example, join a book club to read regularly.
    • There will be times when there will be a desire to do nothing. Yes, you have every right to give yourself a break. Just remember two things: don't think too much about how you want to skip the ritual, try to take the first step. If you still don't want to continue, okay. And one more trick: every time after skipping, return to the habit, and do not reset the result.
    • And finally, don’t forget to look back and see what you have achieved.

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    Principles of methodology 21-40-90

    In total, there are 6 stages, during which a person forms and strengthens new good habits and abandons those that have become inconvenient. The first three phases of a long procedure are called “minor”, ​​the next three phases are called “key”. What are they?

    Before taking action, a person must clearly understand for himself, and best of all, write down what goals he wants to achieve.

    Opposite the notes made, you need to note all the negative factors that prevent him from becoming better, and vow to get rid of them by any possible means.

    Look to the root

    But I think that not everyone will be able to change themselves in eight months. Or a year, or a year and a half. It's probably not even a matter of time. Then what? It seems to me that time is not one of the factors necessary to establish a habit. There is the strength of desire, the degree of thinking and the seriousness of the necessary changes.

    When we talk about a habit, we mean something useful that will help us become better than our former selves. Nobody wants to intentionally start bad habits. Bad habits are acquired automatically, and it's not difficult. All you have to do is gape a little, and that’s it!

    brenkee/Pixabay/Pixabay License

    Useful habits are always an overcoming that requires psychological and physical effort.

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