Human needs. What and how much do we really need?

Is all this really necessary?

I thought: today is Saturday. Where are the people this morning? “I won’t tell you for the whole of Odessa,” but I know that Saturday is shopping time... Auchan and other shopping centers, the horror of our life. And I don’t think of offending anyone. Naturally, I shop at Auchan myself when I’m in Moscow. But always, when I approach the checkout with relief, I think that I have been in a land of nightmares. Huge carts full of all sorts of things, a lot taken just because today it’s a ruble cheaper...

Is it really possible to eat, gobble up, devour, and absorb all this in a week? Or do they all have families of twenty people? Or are all those Saturday crowds getting ready for a wedding? Or...One of my first American impressions, almost fifteen years ago: giant carts in a supermarket, pushed by huge people, elephant people in extreme obesity. Not old, but buried under their own fat. An eerie impression as a symbol of consumer society. And I didn’t want to rejoice and admire the fact that “everything is there.”

Is this the main goal and happiness of life, its meaning, to have 20 shelves with toothbrushes? 50 shelves with toothpaste. And so on, and so on, and so on... We achieved this. Implemented. The meaning of an individual's life in a consumer society has been persistently imposed on us. The meaning is simple and clear. You live to buy. You are born to be bought (the list follows...). You grow and the list of things grows with you... You learn - wonderfully, the list grows. And now you are almost formed. You need to eat, and dress (no worse than others), and a car (of a certain brand), and a computer, and a mobile phone, and…. It's so good that you exist! After all, so many shopping centers and corporations need you, man!

You must throw away your life in the race for clothes, grub, prestigious brands of whatever they want to make prestigious for those who pull the strings of your desires. You don't need to be a thinker, a reader, a reasoner. You will waste the time allotted to you to earn money, which you must then spend on goods. Consume. Let in one hole, let out from another. Finally, the meaning of life emerged in all its simplicity. A person must be educated so that he develops the need to consume as much as possible!!! And note: after all, from all sides they are trying to turn people into primitive ruminants.

I look at photos of my aunts who raised me. Beautiful faces. Smart looking eyes…. They were deprived of much. Weekends were spent reading or walking in the park. In our life there were exhibitions, theaters, art galleries, river buses on the Moscow River, cinema... We remember a lot of things. But I tried to remember the shopping trips. So, for the whole day. To create a complete nightmare. This never happened. Can you imagine? It has never happened that they went to the store just like that. Spend time. Watch... Have fun... I ran for bread and milk. From first grade. What was heavier was brought by adults - in between... We had to stand in queues, that’s what happened. But this was considered a horror and a disadvantage of life. No one spent the day in the store willingly! I remember how they bought me a winter coat in the fifth grade. They came, chose and bought. They went to get a coat, chose it and left. Dot.

It was a pity for the time. So many joys and pleasures around! And these joys did not require terrible investments and enslavement at all. Walking is a joy. Lectures at the university, given by the best professors for free - come and visit... Museums... How easily we have allowed ourselves to be driven into the slavery of things! Understand, I’m not in favor of everyone walking around dressed ugly and colorless. I’m not for people eating something they don’t know. I am against poverty and scarcity. But I am for people to look around and look for other landmarks. Because our only life is worth devoting not to consumption for the sake of consumption, but to the search for needs - that is, the real meaning of human life.

And an example from Ariela Seph’s book “Born in the Ghetto.”

Before the war, her parents lived richly: her father was a famous doctor, her mother inherited a huge inheritance. But then the Germans came to Lithuania. “While my father was in prison, the Germans, accompanied by Lithuanians, broke into the apartment. (…) We arrived in two trucks with a list. Their list was quite accurate. Mom had something to take: all the property left by grandmother - paintings, silver, diamond necklaces bought at some exhibitions while traveling in Europe. All family values ​​went to her. (...)

Some German or Lithuanian put a gun to her pregnant mother’s stomach and demanded that she hand over everything on the list. Mom didn't resist. Everything was open, not locked. So they took everything, literally everything, including furniture. The trucks left, filled to the brim (...)

After the war, my mother became completely indifferent to things. I lost interest completely. She did not buy expensive furniture, dresses, or jewelry, although opportunities appeared for her. (...) She only had two or three dresses.”

I have noticed more than once that people who have gone through serious trials seem to be cleared of cravings for things. They see and understand other values ​​in life. There are so many of them that the things on this list become completely redundant.

It makes sense to look for these values ​​even when life, fortunately, is going well...

Why should you give thanks?

Why do successful people most often engage in charitable activities? Because everything that they have acquired in life is achieved with great work and the availability of opportunities, if they provide these opportunities to others, then they show gratitude to what they already have and share it with those in need. They are grateful to people, good and bad events in their lives, and in general to everything that led them to a high result. They perceive everything that happens in their life as a useful experience and move on, taking into account their mistakes and lessons from fate.

What can we not do without and have no right to do without?

Self love

Talking about self-love has become popular in recent years.
The idea as such is theoretically very close to everyone. But how to bring it to life and how, exactly, should this love be expressed? On vacation in a beautiful Mediterranean hotel, my compatriot picks up breakfast at the buffet counter: fish, sausage, ham, cheese, buns of all kinds, yogurt, salads, pies, cakes...

- You need to love yourself! - she explains to me. “I’ll pamper myself, my love.”

Love your neighbor as yourself

The Great Gospel Instruction.

And it contains the ideal of the human world order. Love for one's neighbor should be born exactly to the same extent as love for oneself. Any violation of this balance leads to tragic imbalance.

Will you love yourself and not love your neighbors? How then can you exist among the unloved? Complete negativity will fall on your head, from which self-love will instantly wither.

Will you love your neighbors, forgetting about yourself? Oh, and your love will be hard for your neighbors! For the love of an unhappy person is always cruel, demanding and despotic.

This was already said thousands of years ago. And it was repeated more than once. It's a pity that not everyone heard:

There is a little child inside each of us. We grow, we blossom, we grow old. But the child remains himself. If we forget to take care of him, he becomes cruel and embittered, always afraid and therefore aggressive.

To feel happy, we must take care of our inner child, just as we would take care of the baby we brought into the world.

We feed him correctly (by the hour and in accordance with his health indications).

We stick to a daily routine.

We make him happy, teach him, entertain him.

We are diligently raising him.

We can be strict, but never cruel.

We teach him to live among other people.

We never scare him.

True love is always based on respect. A self-respecting person will not allow himself to fall low in his own eyes. He is the same in private as he is in front of many. Finding himself in someone else's house as a guest, he will not rummage through other people's boxes, respecting himself. He will not take someone else's, respecting himself. He will not take part in discussing and judging others, respecting himself. He will also not indulge in gluttony and laziness, remembering that his only life cannot be wasted so stupidly and thoughtlessly.

Yes, we grew up in a difficult, unkind world. Starting from kindergarten, we were faced with disrespect for our personality and unceremoniousness. At the slightest provocation, a guilt complex was cultivated in us. We were intimidated with punishments and descriptions of possible consequences. And now we simply don’t understand how to start loving ourselves. We simply do not have such a program built into us.

It's time to create it!

Loving myself, I:

1. I accept my problems and imperfections. I am (or such) who I am! Unique, unique. In some ways different from the others. But that doesn’t make me any worse or better.
2. I think positively. I achieve my goals. My words: I want - I can - I do . When you are in a group of women who want to get rid of excess weight, you immediately see who will succeed quite easily and who is unlikely to succeed. The first ones are set up for success. They joke, smile, share experiences. The eyes of the latter radiate distrust. They are waiting for a trick. They are prepared in advance for a negative result. They demand to be convinced, but still remain unconvinced. They really can't do anything! They are simply firmly and unshakably determined to do just that.
3. I do not allow myself anger, irritation, envy. After all, all this naturally turns against me.
4. I give up excess food.
5. I do not kill my health with idleness, bliss, inaction, laziness.
6. I calmly accept life's adversities without frightening myself.
7. I am soft, tolerant, kind (soft, tolerant, kind) with myself.
8. I look for the good in everything.
9. I don't blame myself.
10. I try to keep my word to myself. If for some reason this does not work out, I calmly analyze the reason for breaking the promise. I can gently reproach myself. But I will never be mentally rude (rude) to myself.

We must be responsible for our lives. We cannot afford to neglect our interests. Once upon a time, I wrote down a harsh phrase from psychologist Fritz Perls: “I do not live in this world to live up to your expectations. And you don’t live in this world to justify mine.”

Let us not expect all sorts of indulgences, benefits, and deep understanding from others. Let us create for ourselves the life we ​​strive for. If anyone owes anyone in this world, it is we ourselves - to ourselves.

How does a healthy physical condition affect success?

Good physical shape, as you know, is the key to the excellent functioning of our brain and body, therefore, people who have achieved success:

• Usually, they practice getting up early - this is 5-6 in the morning. This is the period until the whole world wakes up - the most important and inspiring part of the day. As a rule, this is a good time for yoga, morning jogging and other activities to boost the body’s internal energy, an opportunity to get into a resourceful state;
• adhere to self-discipline and daily routine;
• understand that good health is the key to great achievements;
• try to find time for proper rest and relaxation in order to avoid everyday stress and always be in a working and collected state;
• have activities for the soul, hobbies that return vital and creative energy to them.

Need for emotional stress and risk

Many people have a dominant need for emotional stress and risk.
Often such people choose extreme professions and become stuntmen, racers, test pilots, rock climbers, submariners, etc. But it also happens that, while working in a “peaceful” profession, they “have a blast” during off-duty hours and get carried away extreme sports. However, when organizing an extreme vacation, it is important not to make a mistake in selecting employees who are invited to spend their free time in conditions of risk and stress. Otherwise, instead of motivating staff, you can increase the number of layoffs.

Sometimes a manager who has a need for risk seeks to organize an extreme vacation for his employees. So, in a small Russian company, a young manager was fond of extreme driving. For a long time he tried to involve the male part of his staff in his hobby. However, there were no people willing to join him. Having failed, he ordered the employees out by plane and tried to force them to jump with a parachute. Some liked it, but many refused and later left the company.

Motivators for employees who need emotional stress and risk:

• Formulate challenging tasks for such employees, set goals that will force them to work with tension and effort.
• Emphasize personal responsibility for completing difficult tasks.
• Say this: “Only you, Sergei Ivanovich, with your activity and passion, can solve this labor-intensive task!”
• Give employees assignments in which they need to show endurance (frequent business trips, setting up a new production, etc.)
• Talk about the risks associated with the new project and your trust in the employee's ability to take reasonable risks.
• Direct employees to presentations and tenders.
• Organize extreme holidays for workers who need to take risks.
• Make a stand with photos (rafting down a mountain river, skydiving, extreme driving, etc.)
• Organize themed corporate evenings where employees can talk about their extreme hobbies.

Professional knowledge

Professional knowledge is the presence of competence, qualifications and suitability for a certain profession , by engaging in which a person is able to feed himself, his family, and also have an income that allows him to achieve great goals. Professional knowledge is important because it allows you to earn money, which is the external basis of existence and normal social status. Thus, a person must know his business and constantly improve in it , not only in order to earn money, but also so that by improving his qualifications he becomes a more valuable member of society.

Professional knowledge means not only theoretical knowledge, but also what profession should be practiced, as well as practical skills associated with it. This is one of the most important areas of life, which makes it possible to support everything else. But you should be careful and always realize that for a reasonable person, money is a means of subsistence, not a goal . When too much emphasis is placed on money, there is a risk of losing both oneself and the sense of what it means to be Human. Greed is considered a universal vice, so it must be carefully avoided, on the other hand, working not for money, but for improvement, benefit, and duty. At a higher level, one who understands what his business is is able to derive happiness not from the results, but from the process itself. This is especially important for men, since a man without work degrades very quickly.

Economic knowledge

It is also important for a person to understand the most applied knowledge about housekeeping. Know the prices of products, the needs of the household, how household appliances work, be able to keep documentation and payments, know where to buy everything you need for the home . This is all the knowledge and practical skills related to housekeeping, from cooking and cleaning to repair skills and the ability to fix simple equipment. The larger the farm, the more competence and experience in these areas is needed. After all, it’s one thing to look after an apartment, another thing to look after an entire farm with animals, vegetable gardens, orchards and several buildings.

Economic knowledge is necessary for every person , since we all live in houses, and knowledge about maintaining our life and place of residence is a necessary condition for our household to be properly organized. This knowledge also implies the correct division of responsibilities between all family members, as well as knowledge of the laws. A person should strive to learn as much as possible about his life, but it is important to understand that modern life is quite complex and every year it becomes only more difficult to master. Some things can only be done by specialists, and if we do not have enough time, effort, desire and funds to acquire specialized equipment and skills for one repair, it is better to turn to a specialist.

We also recommend this article: How to use knowledge correctly?

So, every person should know and be able to run a household . Although there is a traditional division of responsibilities, a man should also acquire skills that will help him both become more independent and support his family in a difficult situation.

Health.

Do you want to make better decisions, find your ideal career, realize your maximum potential and receive instructions for individual development?

?
All this can be done using the Human Design
. Build your map and get basic decryptions for free.

To be happy, a person needs health. Each of us periodically gets sick, experiencing physical illness. But if these phenomena are episodic, then they do not have a significant impact on the attitude towards life. If the problem is serious and requires close attention and long-term treatment, then this test can take away the joy. Although strong people who have learned to live and accept physical pain consider themselves happy in this situation. But this is more the exception than the rule.

Knowledge of proper pleasure

Knowledge about proper enjoyment implies that it is necessary to realize not only how to work, but also how to enjoy and relax . This knowledge should lead to the necessary understanding that gross pleasures are not capable of providing satisfaction and will become the cause of new desires . Therefore, it is necessary to translate pleasures into an increasingly subtle realization: to enjoy not trash cinema, but pictures filled with meaning. Not fast food, but simple food that brings joy to the heart. The enjoyment of sleep and rest should come from pleasant fatigue, and not from laziness. To enjoy not promiscuous sexual intercourse, but to build a relationship with one person that will provide the opportunity to experience superior pleasure. The Kama Shastra says something like this: “ with ten women a man will not get as much pleasure as he will get with one beloved woman .”

This kind of pleasure will not dull a person, but will gradually elevate, inspire and become the cause of positive phenomena in his life. Although a person limits himself from low, cheap pleasures, he accustoms himself to enjoy more and more sublimely, and therefore of a higher quality. All this requires some work on yourself, but the pleasure will definitely be greater and of better quality. Without regulated rest and pleasure, a person risks turning his life into a series of gray days that will only lead to a hole. On the other hand, it is important to realize that true happiness cannot be achieved externally, but only internally .

Knowledge about relationships

Knowledge about relationships is knowledge of how to build different relationships with different people : formal, informal, semi-formal . This is the knowledge of how we should communicate with different people to achieve the best result: how to listen to them, how to answer questions, what questions should be asked and what should not be asked, how to correctly introduce ourselves, win over and correctly justify our point of view, how to smooth out rough edges, and how to control yourself.

Feeling control applies to both positive and negative feelings. This is also a communication skill, if we are not able to restrain our feelings - we can push the person away, get bored, fed up, annoyed, angry, scared, and so on. Adequate restraint and the ability to build the right dialogue, wisely distributing your attention is the key to successful communication with both close and barely familiar people.

We also recommend this article: Listening and obeying – how to correctly perceive information?

It may seem that all this is intended to manipulate people, but this is not so. We must be able to present ourselves in certain ways in different situations in order to achieve the best result for both parties. After all, sometimes we need not only to bring a person closer, but also to distance him or besiege him. Sometimes relationships may be inappropriate, but good communication skills will allow you to maintain the necessary distance without causing unpleasant feelings to the interlocutor. Thus, communication is a very multifaceted activity, the mastery of which provides many opportunities, and the inability to conduct a normal dialogue and understand the rules of communication can often lead to problems . That is, we need to understand the necessary distance, approach, take into account the personality of everyone and at the same time maintain our positions and also show our own personality and interests.

Understanding others

From understanding yourself comes understanding of others. When we consciously approach our lives and look at ourselves not mechanically or stereotyped, but with a fresh look, we acquire the ability to also look at others. This makes it possible to see the reason for other people’s actions, and therefore judge them correctly. The ability to fully understand your motives and feelings, you gain the ability to correctly judge the actions of others. And if we see people’s hearts correctly, then we are able to properly build relationships with them.

Understanding others makes it possible not only to understand which people should build relationships with, but also gives a clear understanding of how this should be done. We are talking about deep, lasting relationships , not just acquaintances. It is in such relationships that one can experience the highest manifestations of love, friendship, reliability, fidelity and other feelings that connect people, to which everyone strives. But this requires good relationships, which must be gradually built. It is not understanding oneself and the presence of repulsive qualities that prevents the creation of such relationships, but understanding oneself and cultivating virtuous qualities in practice contributes to the creation of quality relationships. Understanding others is based on understanding oneself, and good relationships are based on understanding others.

What knowledge does everyone need?

A person must know a lot in order to bring happiness to himself and others through his actions, lifestyle, speech and example. We are talking about diverse knowledge that affects different areas of life. Development must not only occur in one area, otherwise there will be a significant imbalance. By concentrating only on a career, a person can easily lose his health or forget about what it means to be human. If a person refuses professional activity, he will be forced, sooner or later, to commit unpleasant acts for the sake of survival. Therefore, it is important to realize that diverse knowledge is needed in different areas, and its development must be harmonious .

Of course, some knowledge is more important than others, but it should be studied and applied in the right proportion. In such a ratio that knowledge brings happiness and benefit, and does not become a cause of disappointment, apathy or degradation.

In what areas should a person have knowledge and what knowledge should everyone have:

• professional knowledge
• spiritual knowledge
• economic knowledge
• self-understanding
• understanding others
• knowledge about relationships
• knowledge about correct behavior and lifestyle
• knowledge about proper pleasure
• knowledge of laws, etiquette, generally accepted rules of behavior

Faith.

We are used to taking care of our physical health: eating delicious food, sleeping, getting treatment. What about the internal state? He also needs recharge. This is what faith is for. It is not for nothing that there are so many different religions and teachings in the world. There is no nation that does not have its own philosophy that shapes its outlook on life. In fact, the form of government of the state can also become a belief.

In the Soviet Union, the assertion that faith is the opium of the people was considered irrefutable. This is what those who blindly believed in communism said. And someone believes in science, statistics, research, confirmed data. Whether we understand it or not, it is faith that is the beacon on our path. If the light goes out, the traveler will stop. Faith is what a person needs to be happy.

Need for recognition

Employees for whom the need for acceptance and approval from management and colleagues is the leading one, reason like this.
“The main thing is that I be respected. If I don’t feel respected and recognized for my successes, I won’t be able to work for any money.” As a rule, these are emotional and open people. Encouraging the need for recognition is beneficial to the company because it is usually expressed in diligent employees. We can distinguish two planes of relationships in which employees can satisfy their need for positive acceptance - vertical and horizontal. Vertically, this is a positive assessment and recognition of a job well done by management. Horizontally - this is recognition from colleagues, respect for the professionalism and experience of the employee, turning to him for advice, advice or professional help.

Recommendations for motivating employees who need recognition:

• Publicly, at a meeting or meeting, express a positive assessment of an employee who has successfully solved a difficult problem.
• Remember that verbal gratitude motivates no less than monetary encouragement.
• Express gratitude for good work in a timely manner, immediately after the employee receives a good result.
• Develop and implement a system of titles in the company for successful employees (for example, “Golden Broker” in a real estate agency or “Best Salesman of the Month” in a trading company).
• Reinforce the rank system with symbolic insignia (such as pins or name cards that can be pinned to a suit lapel or work uniform).
• Develop and implement a modern stand in the company with information and photographs of successful employees.
• Give a successful employee the right to independently design his office or workplace.
• Reward employees for their length of service with the company.
• Organize an exhibition of achievements in a successful division (for example, make exhibits of the goods that your company produces, put a card with the names of the manufacturers for each exhibit).