Psychology of relationships between a guy and a girl
According to scientific research, men fall in love faster than women. They are the ones who most often take the first step at the initial stage of a relationship. Whereas girls more often doubt the correctness of their choice.
It is important to bring thoughts and feelings into a state of harmony, distancing yourself from strong emotions, and try to understand whether the person is next to you? This will take time, but you shouldn’t rush, so as not to complain later that the guy doesn’t always pay enough attention. Especially if the couple wants to register their relationship.
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Everyone has principles, rules, a special view of the world. And also danger signals that indicate that the current relationship will not lead to anything good. Dr. Van Eppa says: at first a person tries to seem better than he is. And only after 3 months hidden character traits begin to appear. Therefore, you need to take a close look at your partner, his character, and behavior.
If a man has stopped paying due attention and is constantly dissatisfied with something, then it is better to separate so as not to reproach himself later for a mistake.
Female look
If a girl doesn’t have enough attention in a relationship, women’s logic will play a cruel joke: fantasies will come that the guy is cheating and that’s why he’s cold.
Some ladies believe that they have become uninteresting due to an unsuccessful image change. And romantic natures are sure that if the gentleman makes a sad grimace, you can forget about the prospect of a romance: the man does not want to build a serious relationship.
Hysterical ladies believe: if a gentleman, because of his busy schedule, does not want to devote an hour or two to his sweetheart, then he puts his male plans above female desires. Ladies constantly remind you of themselves, call, send SMS, and harass you with scandals. This option necessarily leads to a break, because no psyche can withstand powerful pressure.
Possible reasons why the guy began to pay less attention
The reasons may be different: fatigue, workload.
Therefore, before you find out anything with a young man, you need to understand why the guy stopped paying attention to the girl. Relationships are fragile things, you need to act carefully. It’s easy to ruin them, but putting everything back in place and reviving feelings is hard, long work. Possible reasons for a young man's distance:
- A very long-term relationship. It is likely that after spending a lot of time together, the couple simply lost their love spark. Married couples face this situation. Life, work, children, constant fatigue make them routine and boring. The right decision would be to distribute responsibilities among all family members and periodically go on vacation together.
- Self-hypnosis. In some situations, the girl felt that the guy stopped devoting time to her. To solve the problem, it is enough to simply talk frankly with the young man.
- New interests and values emerged. For example, he opened a business, got a job or went to study. This does not mean the death of warm feelings and sympathy. His thoughts are just temporarily occupied with important matters. Wait, time will bring everything back to its place.
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- Stress or depression. Angry boss, envious friends, car broke down. The bottom line is that the guy is facing difficulties and needs help or support. Rarely does a man admit when things get hard. And in such a situation he will simply withdraw into himself.
- Fatigue or moral exhaustion. After spending the whole day at work or school, the guy wants to relax. The girl, bored, demands activity and attention from him. By giving the young man a few hours to rest, many problems can be avoided.
- Change of image or appearance. Representatives of the stronger half of humanity love with their eyes. Therefore, if during the meeting the girl was a long-haired blonde, and then suddenly dyed her hair and cut her hair, there is no guarantee that he will like it. This rule applies to your figure: she has gained a couple of extra pounds or has lost a lot of weight (everyone has different tastes). The guy himself may not understand the cause of the problem.
- Family issues. Relatives have problems that need to be solved urgently. Or one of the relatives died. Naturally, all attention will be focused on resolving issues.
- Changes in behavior. Few people show their character right away. This is laid down on a subconscious level. And perhaps the man saw his beloved from a side that was unpleasant to him. It is important to try to preserve the qualities that attracted him in the very beginning.
- Love has passed or a new passion has appeared. The most unpleasant and terrible scenario. After all, in this situation nothing can be done. It is quite difficult to accurately understand the appearance of a third party. But if you know a man well, you can notice signs of betrayal.
- Big requests. There are women who never get enough attention. They want the man to always be in their field of vision. But each person should have his own personal space. Therefore, before looking for an answer to the question of why a guy pays little attention to me, you should think about whether he spends so little time with you.
What to do if a guy stops paying attention
For some reason, many girls, when in a relationship, stop taking care of their figure, appearance and behavior. Naturally, few people will like this development of events. When thinking about the question of what a girl should do if a guy pays little attention to her, the main thing is to be ready for hard and painstaking work on yourself and the situation as a whole.
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There are several psychological methods that are worth trying to correct the situation:
- Personal hobbies. Most often, a girl devotes herself entirely to a young man, forgetting about her own desires and interests. But excessive attention turns guys off. Therefore, it is worth picking up a hobby and occupying your free time with it.
- Little secret. At a certain point in the relationship, a guy begins to believe that he knows everything about his beloved woman and reads her like an open book. It’s worth taking the initiative and letting him understand his mistake.
- Spending time together. No matter how trite it may sound, common interests or entertainment really help to get closer. This could be going to the movies or the gym, going for a walk, or even cleaning the house.
- Straight Talk. It is important to be able to talk to each other, as well as hear the interlocutor. Share problems, experiences, emotions. This will help the couple understand each other better.
- Correct speech. It is enough to talk to each other in a respectful tone, without insults or humiliation. After all, the main thing in a relationship is mutual respect.
- Sincere joy. It is important to be able to rejoice at your loved one’s successes or thank them for their help around the house. Men also love to be praised and appreciated.
- Tasty food. The saying is true: “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Guys love to eat delicious food. Therefore, when he realizes that he will never try such food anywhere, interest and attention to the woman will increase significantly.
Even at the very beginning of a relationship, every girl tries to attract the attention of a man by correspondence. To do this, it is important to follow a few simple rules:
- Short correspondence. In order for a man to increase his interest in communication, he should limit himself to 3-5 messages a day.
- You need to answer twice as long as he wrote. No matter how long it took him. This will increase the guy's interest.
- There should be no excess of emoticons and brackets. They show the girl's interest in correspondence.
- It’s better to start communication with some intriguing news, and put off banal greetings until next time.
- Messages sent late are best ignored. So that the man does not think that the interlocutor is sitting and waiting for someone to write to her.
Let's talk a little about quarrels
Interesting fact: arguing is a way to attract attention. Marvelous? But psychologists have more than once encountered the fact that quarrels between spouses often arise due to a woman’s desire to attract the attention of a man.
How does this happen? First, the woman asks the man for attention, is dissatisfied, and cries. If all her attempts to get a man to finally spend time with her in a good way remain in vain, then she may intuitively start to make trouble with him. As they say, even a bad attitude is already at least some attention. If a woman does not get hers in an amicable way, then she will quarrel with a man over trifles in order to get at least some attention to her person.
How to teach a guy a lesson if he doesn't pay attention
If a guy does not always pay attention to a girl, then at the initial stage of the relationship, if desired, you can teach him a lesson. Then he will become more active and take the initiative to win the girl again.
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First, forget about calls and messages for a few days. Or give reasons for jealousy. Go with your friends to a cafe or club, tell the guy about your conversation with an old friend (classmate). It is important to know when to stop so that light revenge does not turn into a full-scale showdown, including accusations of treason. You can also accidentally delete all joint photos from social networks. Such a step will let the young man understand that the girl is able to do without him.
However, there is no need to turn into a hysteric, do dirty tricks or gossip. Behavior must be worthy and appropriate.
If we are talking about a married couple, then the following is worth trying:
- Announce a boycott: temporarily not talk to a man, ignore requests or not pay attention at all. He will understand the reason for this behavior and ask for forgiveness.
- Leave home: go stay with your mother or friend for a few days. The man will be worried, nervous, and will also have time to get bored.
- Put aside household chores: washing, cooking, cleaning. This behavior of a woman should prompt a man to talk.
Happy, strong relationships can only be built through mutual respect and patience with each other. Therefore, when problems arise, the first thing to do is to simply talk frankly.
Arrange romantic surprises
Do you want to become closer with your husband? Then don't kill the romance. It must be present in life on a permanent basis. For example, you can cook a delicious dinner for your loved one, place candles around the room and chill the wine in advance. The husband may be surprised to see a beautifully set table. But since the surprise will be pleasant, the man will hurry home next time to find something similar.
You don’t need to please your loved one every day, so that you don’t get tired of romance. You should come up with different ways to warm up feelings. Invite a man to a cafe, go to a movie or to a social event. Take a walk under the moonlight or go on vacation. Take the initiative and demand the same from your man. With mutual efforts, you will be able to revive your former passion and ignite the fire of love.
Useful advice from psychologists
The beautiful half of humanity is more open emotionally. If a man cannot pay enough attention, talking every half hour about his warm and tender feelings for a girl, this does not mean their absence. It's just harder for them to express their love in words.
Following some advice from a psychologist will help normalize relationships:
- You shouldn’t get hung up on sex and your emotions, because there is also a living person nearby. A man also needs free care and support.
- If a young man claims that there is no problem, try to distance yourself. Perhaps this will make it easier for him to understand that she really exists.
- The accumulated claims must be discussed calmly, without scandal. Just sit down and talk.
- There are no perfect people, every person makes mistakes sometimes. Be patient, wait. Most likely, everything will return to normal on its own.
- No one has to live up to expectations. A girl may not like her partner’s behavior, and vice versa.
When in long-term relationships, people stop appreciating those around them. A man should pay attention and time to a girl. At the same time, it is very important not to forget how to understand each other, to pay attention to even the most insignificant, but committed from the bottom of the heart actions. Patience and understanding are the basis of any relationship. There is no limit to perfection; you need to understand from the very beginning whether a person is ready to put up with the shortcomings of another.
Be interesting
How to understand that your husband has fallen out of love? A man who has lost interest in his woman stops showing tender feelings towards her and talks to her less. The lady becomes uninteresting to him. Think about how you can transform yourself. Look at yourself from the outside and find your flaws. But judge objectively and unbiasedly. Are you a boring person who is not interested in anything? Then take care of your education. People are interested in talking with people who can carry on the conversation.
“Why doesn’t my husband pay attention to me?” - a stupid girl with whom there is nothing to talk about might say. A lady who wants to hold the attention of her husband must be savvy in various fields of knowledge and have at least a superficial understanding of history, art, music, cinema and psychology.