Spiritual laws of life. A very important and necessary topic.
If we take a house as an analogy, we are talking about the foundation. If the state is about its laws, without which it is impossible.
This is a very clear example. Why is it important? Because the topic of this article may seem completely unimportant and insignificant to many.
But try to imagine a house that was built on bare ground without a foundation? What will happen to him after a while? How long will it last? Remember the fairy tale about the three little pigs?
If you have already decided to build a house, then build it thoroughly according to all the rules and laws . And since we were born, then let’s live according to the laws of the world in which we have the good fortune to be.
- How to find the meaning of life?
Otherwise, your whole life will be nothing more than a straw house that will fly apart at any blow of the breeze. And it will constantly need to be patched or completely rebuilt.
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Spiritual laws are the basis on which life must be built.
Then neither winds, nor earthquakes, nor floods, nor droughts will be terrible. Your house of life will withstand everything and it will not matter to it.
Problems, stress, disappointments, resentments, betrayals, losses - nothing can shake the house of your life, because it will stand on a solid foundation.
By the way: you can read how to find peace of mind here, I can also advise where it’s best to relieve stress.
- How to stop being nervous and start living?
We need to look not at the outside of our world, which is constant and changeable, but inside ourselves - where everything comes from and where everything goes... To spiritual laws , which are eternal, constant and independent of any external circumstances.
Having built our lives according to these laws, we learn to see the external world in a completely different way and to perceive everything that happens in it differently, on a different level.
Spiritual laws, rules of life, cannot simply be taken and learned. These are not at all the rules to which we are accustomed.
Write “Zhi” and “shi” with the letter “i”. Memorized, memorized and that’s enough. But I can’t help but say that I once discovered the great power of words and language. I am happy to share this here.
Spiritual laws have a different nature and can only be understood by observing them and living by them. The more and more often we try to live according to the laws of the soul, the deeper and stronger we realize and understand their essence. The wider and stronger our connection with the inner world, with the soul, with God becomes.
Where do we start?
To understand what these laws are, you need to turn to religion, which, as they say, is “responsible” for the spiritual component of a person, although sometimes it is religion that is used for their own purposes by those who benefit from it. But that’s not about that now.
You need to be very careful with religion, because you can often encounter extremes and closedness, which can be dangerous without understanding why and why.
I defined it this way for myself. I follow what resonates in my soul , where I see the meaning and do not feel deception, falsehood, lies and substitution of concepts.
I do not understand the closedness of many religious teachings to other directions. That is, everything that is not from here is a lie, it is a myth, it is fiction and the road to nowhere. My understanding of true faith is here.
It is important for me not only to learn the laws of the soul, but also to understand why they are needed, why I should follow them . And this reason should not be a foreign body that I must accept simply because I have to.
No. This should be clear at the level of reason, at the level of intuition, there should be no resistance or rejection.
That is why I will start with Christianity and move on. Because it is in this religion, namely in its interpretation for ordinary people, that I see a problem for myself and these very rejections and misunderstandings.
Although in its essence Christianity is beautiful. As you read the Bible, each time you will discover more and more new meanings both for the world around you and for yourself.
Is it possible to break the rules?
Periods of human life
Strong-willed qualities allow people to persistently achieve some result. If they are weak, then a person cannot fulfill the requirements put forward to himself. Life rules are not a law; no outsider will punish you for non-compliance.
Complying with the system of requirements is a personal matter for everyone, but sometimes relationships with other people depend on it
The rules of life for a person are not constant. He decides for himself why he needs them, how to comply with them and what benefits he will be able to get. If he does not follow the basic requirements, then his conscience and guilt begin to torment him.
Important! Life rules help you cope with difficulties, get inspired and solve internal problems.
Some famous personalities specifically give motivational speeches. On them they talk about their principles, life situations, how to overcome obstacles.
Christianity.
The main spiritual laws in Christianity.
What can be called the main law in Christianity?
That's right, commandments. Ten Commandments of Christianity.
What confuses me? No, not in the commandments themselves, of course, they in their essence carry the truth of life. I'm talking about causes and consequences, about conditions, about crime and punishment.
The commandments must be strictly observed, otherwise the soul will go to hell. They are thereby, as it were, torn away from our life on Earth. We must because there will be punishment after death.
Well, death is still perceived by a person in isolation from life. This is something we don’t want to think about because we want to live and not die. And we cannot as clearly and concretely perceive the punishments that may await us beyond the threshold of life, beyond which anything at all may await us. And it is very difficult to project what will happen next, behind the fog of ideas and expectations, onto real life.
Therefore, the commandments are perceived by us as being in isolation from our real life on earth. They are sometimes perceived simply as a deterrent.
But their meaning is still in our development and spiritual growth.
That is, we can say that we are forced to perform - led by the fear of punishment . There is no deep understanding of why . There is a lack of integrity in understanding. A negative attitude is formed.
In plain language, let’s just say that I don’t like the presentation of these great laws of human life.
The meaning of their observance should be closer to the person right here and now.
That's why I said at the very beginning of the article that this topic may not be at all important for many of us. And to be more precise, it is not recognized as important because it is cut off from us.
The commandments are there, in religion, in monasteries, in churches, but here I am, I need to live. If you want to live, know how to move around.
Let us still take Christian spiritual laws as a basis, because the value of the commandments is unspeakably high. And with this basis, let's move on and see what we can find in other traditions and religions. Maybe we can find something important there.
I’ll say right away that I found it for myself.
Ten Commandments of Christianity.
You can easily find God's commandments on the Internet. Let's look on Wikipedia.
Since there are more than one religions on Earth, in order not to offend anyone, let’s note for ourselves only those commandments that speak about a person’s relationship to himself and to the world around him (this is exactly what we are looking for today - spiritual laws of life ).
But let’s omit those commandments that talk about the name of God, about honoring God, about the days of the week, and so on. Today I am trying to find commonality, and not the other way around.
- Honor your father and your mother, so that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.
- Dont kill.
- Don't commit adultery.
- Don't steal.
- Do not bear false witness against your neighbor.
- Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house; You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.
So, to love and honor our father and mother - our life is extended by following this law.
Don't kill. What is important is that there are no additional notes here that some people are still allowed, but others are not. For example, people are not allowed, but animals are allowed. No. Don't kill at all. Very clear.
Don't commit adultery. That is, do not cheat on your wife or husband. Again, without explanations or additions. Everything is very clear.
I have an interesting article about abstaining from sex, which turns out to be necessary.
Don't steal and don't lie. Don't covet anything that belongs to others.
In addition to the commandments, there are eight main sins in Christianity. We must definitely note them and under no circumstances miss them.
Gluttony, fornication, greed, anger, sadness, despondency, vanity, pride are also things that should not be done.
Before reading further, you may want to take a moment to think about which of these are present in your life.
So, these were the main spiritual laws of the life of a Christian.
How to create the mood of a successful person?
- Smile more often, in the morning, approaching the mirror, say: “I am a wonderful person and a successful and interesting day awaits me,” “I can easily realize all my desires,” “my life is changing for the better.” Ideally, the selected phrases are repeated 20 times for better perception at the subconscious level;
- It is useful to listen to positive music - jazz, classical, melodic rock, something inspiring to achieve feats;
- keep track of your successes, achievements, write in a diary;
- learn to find possible solutions in any situation;
- remember - it’s easier and more effective to live positively, drive away sad thoughts, and switch to the good.
The theme of a happy person in the modern world has taken on a new form - previously the search for happiness in the outside world was considered, they were looking for the bird of happiness, now a new approach has appeared - to find happiness in oneself and create it in the world around us. Such ideas are more productive, because a person can actively participate in creating his own happiness, and this is more pleasant than waiting on the shore for the favor of fortune.
We wish everyone only happiness and success in life!
Topics: Mental health, Personal growth, Overcoming fears, Self-esteem, Self-realization
Buddhism.
Spiritual laws of Buddhism.
Let's move on to Buddhism. What do we find in this ancient Eastern tradition.
We also see the Ten Commandments . I will reflect here everything except the last one, which, as in the case of Christianity, directs us further to the symbols of Buddhism itself with its features as a faith.
Don't kill.
Don't steal.
Don't commit adultery.
Do not lie or slander.
So far there is an absolute coincidence with Christianity. Let's look further.
Do not use intoxicating substances. What do we mean by such substances? It's alcohol, smoking, drugs, right? Our body is perfect and our perception of the world only worsens under the influence of alcohol and tobacco, and not vice versa, as we think. It’s just that, in fact, we are accustomed to perceiving this world very superficially and incompletely, I would say. But it is possible to develop subtle and vivid perception without intoxicating substances.
I can recommend meditation. In particular, a simple breathing meditation, Tonglen meditation, which is practiced by the Dalai Lama. And here I must definitely mention pranayama and one of the pranayama techniques.
Don't gossip about other Buddhists. I left it too because the emphasis here is on gossip and not on Buddhists. The word Buddhist can be safely replaced with “man”. Don't gossip!
Do not exalt yourself and do not humiliate others. In other words, arrogance.
Don't be stingy with those in need. In other words, compassion and generosity.
Do not hold a grudge and do not incite evil.
Also in Buddhism there are pramitas - six actions that, when performed, lead a person to enlightenment - the highest point of spiritual development.
Six Pramitas of Buddhism.
Generosity. Agree that most people are greedy and greedy. Generosity is a completely opposite concept.
The law of karma always exists, no matter what. (here is an article about karma) It is by showing generosity to the world around you and to those living in it that you can fully experience the manifestation of the world’s generosity towards you.
Ethics. It means understanding and realizing the meaning of your life. Not to live meaninglessly, thoughtlessly, but to understand why, and learn to understand what to do in order to live like this.
Patience. In everything.
Zeal. Down with laziness. We believe in our success, we believe in ourselves, we are not afraid to work and work towards our goal. And patience will help us.
Meditation. Develops calmness and concentration. It teaches you how to work with your own mind, a new vision of the world opens, and a deep sense of unity between yourself and God comes. The answer to why meditate is here.
Wisdom. This is the result of the previous five actions. After all, the meaning is in their sequence and interconnectedness. Opening up an understanding of the essence of the universe. Everything is one, everything is one. It is impossible to read and understand this. The sixth pramita can only be achieved by fully observing the first five.
Look, there is already a principle of interconnection here! , what is important. That is, there is an understanding of the meaning in what we do, there is a goal. Great.
Let's take a brief look at Taoism and Hinduism.
A good happy life is possible
You can live a happy life by learning to use the rules of psychology and changing your attitude towards life. Happiness is a state of mind; it needs to be cultivated, radiated, and not sought. People who are able to be happy in their souls attract other, positive-minded individuals, find work more easily, find new opportunities, and achieve success.
Hinduism and its spiritual rules.
Ten Precepts.
Patience.
Forgiveness.
Self-control and self-restraint. This is otherwise called asceticism. I have an article about this. This prescription, in my opinion, is very general. That is, it also concerns patience and, for example, from Christianity, gluttony, anger, lust (adultery). Many of the rules and commandments require self-restraint and self-control from us.
Don't steal.
Honesty and purity.
Sexual control and control of passions. Sexual energy is the basis of your development and success. Did you know about this? You can find out in the article on the website.
Knowledge of the truths of the sacred scriptures and spiritual knowledge.
Liberation from the evil within yourself.
Of the five basic commandments, we, on the same principle as above, can only take:
«Complete safety of all living beings»
Time is more valuable than money
Of all the world's resources, time is the most valuable. “Dude, it’s kind of obvious.” Why do we collectively waste time as if we have an eternity at our disposal?
Do you sometimes wonder how long you have left on Earth? Even if you live to be 80, it's not that long if you waste your time.
Be judicious with your time management. Don't throw it around like you can get it back. You can always earn more money spent, but you will never get back the lost time.
Time passes irrevocably and forever.
German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer:
The average person is concerned with how to kill time, but the talented person strives to use it.
Laws of spiritual life in Taoism.
Ten Rules of Taoism
Dont kill.
Elimination of lust.
Do not steal.
Tell the truth.
Be sober, clean.
Honor your ancestors.
Help those who do good. Do good accordingly.
Help the unlucky and you will find good luck . Still, this rule does not quite fit the concept of fundamental. Still, the key word here is “Help.” And this was just in the previous rule.
No revenge.
Exercise
Think about and answer the following questions:
- Which recommendation did you find most valuable and applicable to your life?
- Could you start using these communication hacks?
- What rules do you already use in personal relationships and what could you try in the near future?
- How do job and career recommendations reflect your situation? What would make sense to start implementing?
- Think over your program to practice the skills you like. For example, set aside 3 days for each communication life hack or a month to learn how to create internal motivation in your loved ones. Put it in your calendar, set reminders, come up with a reward and go!
We wish you good luck!
We also recommend reading:
- Storytelling
- Mnemonics for beginners
- Four burner theory
- 7 Ways to Make People Feel Important
- Rule of three "Yes"
- How to Deal with Difficult People
- Rules and ways to improve memory
- Effective communication techniques: a selection of useful materials
- Coaching: what is it and how to learn it
- 12 Golden Rules for Life - life hacks for improving your life from Marty Nemko. Part 2
- Techniques for a successful presentation: a selection of useful materials
Key words: 1Communications, 1Time management
Spiritual laws of life in yoga. Yama and Niyama.
Rules of life in yoga. Target.
I want to end with Yama and Niyama because it is important for me to have a clear MEANING and PURPOSE of these rules. And it was in yoga that I found what I was looking for in full, or, let’s say, in a form and interpretation that was understandable to me.
I’ll immediately give you a link to an article about yoga.
So finally, yoga. Yama and Niyama.
Before defining the rules of Yama and Niyama and trying to combine everything that we received above into one set of rules, let's define this.
In yoga, the meaning, the reason for performing Yama and Niyama is very clearly given. Personally, I accepted this meaning for myself and offer it to you.
There is a famous work by the great Patanjali, where he outlined the essence of the “eightfold path” of yoga. The ultimate goal of this path is a state known as Samadhi.
In simple words, it is the achievement of complete unity with the Almighty. A state when that which alienates God from us is overcome and dissolved. The power of time and space is broken.
This is the state of realizing the Lord, superconsciousness. In this state, the yogi can leave the body and return to it again whenever he wants. In fact, death, which does not exist for the soul, is defeated.
Yoga, in short, is the path to God. Every soul created by God has as its main goal the desire for Him and knowledge of Him, overcoming the limitations and delusions associated with life on earth.
The soul can go to the Goal for many lives. This is a very long path and on it she learns everything that can be known. He will experience all the suffering and joy that one can experience. There will be nothing that does not touch the experience of the soul.
But the main goal remains and will always be the knowledge of God, samadhi.
The path of spiritual development.
It is impossible to take today and right now to immerse yourself in this state. We will live life after life. Until one day we realize within ourselves the desire to take the path of spiritual development.
That is, first of all, we must realize for ourselves the need to take the first step. And if such a desire appears, then the soul has come to this, it means it is ready .
And so the soul feels that life as it is, false and inferior, does not suit it. And in the end he realizes the need for spiritual development - a person wants to know his inner world and answer questions concerning his soul. He begins to feel something in himself that, perhaps, he simply did not notice before.
Then we can come to church. Maybe we start reading spiritual literature, maybe we react differently to emerging internal impulses.
But, as I said, at the very beginning, very often we do something without understanding why. But this is also a path. Over time, little by little, everyone will begin to discover this meaning for themselves if they ask and think about it.
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Yama and Niyama are sequential movement.
The Eightfold Path of Yoga contains everything you need. The meaning of any religion is the pursuit of God. But here it is reflected very logically and clearly.
For example, let’s take the third stage of the “path”. Asanas. Something that is very popular today. How many fitness yoga centers are open? Physical exercise through yoga asanas really develops the body, warms it up, pumps blood, and has a positive effect on breathing.
I can recommend a simple but very effective set of Surya Namaskar exercises for a beginner.
But! For the spiritual path, these are simply meaningless actions. Although, as we see, this is the third step on the path to God. And without the first two, asanas are just physical exercise and nothing more. I don’t remember that I developed spiritually in physical education classes at school.
And further, to the fourth stage - pranayama, and further, and further. For those who miss the basis of the spiritual laws of Yama and Niyama, when performing exercises from the third and fourth stages, the doors of new spiritual discoveries will be locked.
As stated above, the rules of the spiritual path are, first of all, practice , thanks to which, through effort and time, we discover a new perception of the world.
And just without this new vision and sensation, we will not be able to catch and notice what Asanas, Pranayama and so on contain. They contain the keys to further spiritual growth, but we simply will not notice them, we will assume that they simply do not exist, because they will be closed to us. We won't be able to see them.
Any path must be filled with meaning.
We can wander away from yoga and face the same thing. You can go to church every weekend and pray regularly. But we will not feel the treasures that are stored in sacred rituals, and prayers will be just words, unable to resurrect the spiritual that is within us.
Breakfast table setting diagram and basic rules
Discussion: 5 comments
- Philosopher:
20.11.2019 at 12:27It can be quite difficult to restrain yourself and observe the rules of decency in crowded places. At concerts, in transport, at various rallies, the audience is quite diverse and there is a great temptation to respond to boorish people in their language. But you must try not to please them and not stoop to their level. You always need to maintain clarity of mind and be able to culturally, but boldly and with humor, put a rude person in his place. Good rules of decency in the article, it would not be superfluous to repeat, thank you for your work.
Answer
- Igor:
20.11.2019 at 19:37
I liked it, it will be useful for many. Thank you
Answer
- Valeria:
11/22/2019 at 11:56 pm
Very interesting article. She revealed all the questions I have ever faced in terms of etiquette and behavior in public places. Thanks to the author. In our everyday world there are so few well-mannered and intelligent people.
Answer
Vilkov Nikolay:
11/23/2019 at 00:24
Valeria, thank you for your kind words! It's always nice to communicate with a well-mannered person. Positive emotions and positivity rule the world and help you win!
Answer
12/17/2019 at 17:49
Very good rules. I always try to behave correctly. But some people often neglect them, which makes the people around them feel not very comfortable.
Answer
So. Spiritual laws of life in yoga.
Yama and Niyama are the main conditions on the path of spiritual development. This is where you need to start. And if you missed it, then going further is pointless, and maybe even dangerous, because you can be disappointed and see something that is not there, or vice versa.
Pit. 5 rules.
Yama is the first stage of yoga , according to the Yoga Sutras, containing 5 rules for a person’s relationship with the outside world.
- Nonviolence . Again, the already famous “Thou shalt not kill.”
- Tell the truth , don't lie.
- Don't covet someone else's.
- Control of lust , sexual abstinence, chastity (at least until marriage). Very similar to “Thou shalt not commit adultery”
- Generosity, non-hoarding , freedom from attachments, things, from other people's opinions, one's own inner freedom and the inviolability of another person's freedom.
Niyama. 5 rules.
Niyama is the second stage of yoga. It contains 5 rules for a person’s relationship with his inner world.
- Purity of body and mind . That is, hygiene, clean clothes, but at the same time we monitor the purity of our thoughts.
- Happiness is in the present moment . Here and now. Everything is fine, positive attitude.
- Self-discipline. Patience, diligence, hard work in spiritual aspirations.
- Study of scriptures, spiritual books.
- Accepting God as the goal of life.
Subtotal.
Now let's summarize everything.
This is the final table of spiritual laws according to world religions and traditions.
Christianity | Buddhism | Hinduism | Taoism | Yoga |
Dont kill | Don't kill | Don't kill and save life | Dont kill | Dont kill |
Do not commit adultery, fornication. | Don't commit adultery | Sexual control | Elimination of Lust | Fighting lust |
Don't steal | Don't steal | Don't steal | Don't steal | Don't steal |
Do not lie | Do not lie | Honesty. Do not lie | Do not lie | Do not lie |
Don't be greedy. Or be generous. | Generosity | Liberation from Evil | Do good and help those who do good | Generosity, non-hoarding, freedom from attachment to things. |
Don't give in to anger. Or be kind and calm | Don't drink, don't smoke, don't take drugs | Patience | Be sober | Self-discipline, diligence, patience |
Sadness and despondency. Be joyful | Don't gossip | Forgiveness | Don't take revenge. Forgive accordingly. | Striving for spiritual knowledge, reading spiritual literature |
Vanity and pride. | Refusal of evil and not inciting evil | The pursuit of spiritual knowledge | Honor your ancestors | Purity of body and mind, purity of thoughts |
Honor your father and mother | Understanding the meaning of life | Happiness is here and now | ||
Gluttony. Don't eat too much | Patience, diligence, fight against laziness | The purpose of life is God | ||
Meditation. Calmness and desire to understand your spiritual side |
In Christianity, I combined the commandment “do not commit adultery and fornication”, the sins “sadness” and “despondency”, as well as “vanity” and “pride”. I combined “don’t covet someone else’s” and “don’t steal” - I think they are similar in many ways.
I did not write Buddhist “wisdom” - it is rather the result of observing the rules, and not one of them. Made a few more adjustments.
The main laws of life.
In all five religions and traditions under consideration, the first 4 spiritual rules coincide.
This:
DON'T KILL!
Do not encroach on any life. You didn’t create it, and it’s not for you to stop it. A person is not able to create life, he can only have sex, and life arises without his participation. The man is simply a guide. And once again I want to note that there are no notes anywhere that we are talking only about human life.
CONTROL OF SEXUAL DESIRE!
Both in marriage and after it. You have a choice. You can choose the path of chastity. You can practice sexual practices and conserve sexual energy. But you must take control of it.
And first of all, do not cheat on your spouse, exclude promiscuous relationships if you are not married. And stop masturbating and watching pornography. Purity of thoughts also fits here.
DO NOT STEAL!
The law of karma works as it did, whether we believe in it or not, it doesn’t matter to it. If you take someone else’s, then don’t even doubt that you will have to give up yours. What will it be? It is unknown, but it is a fact that it will happen.
DO NOT LIE!
How difficult this is to achieve. It seems to me that everyone is deceiving. Some more, some less.
And I’ll also tell you one interesting thing that, in my opinion, Yogananda Paramahansa said: if you said something but didn’t do it, then you weakened the power of your thoughts.
In fact, it turns out that by doing so we make it clear that our words mean nothing and do not materialize . And in the future, the space will “get used” to the fact that your words are just words and it will be more difficult to achieve what you want. So it is with lies, when our words are not true.
Further we see discrepancies, but at the same time we can notice that all the rules have much in common and the direction is the same, and it is understandable.
Also in Yama and Niyama, according to many sources, there are 10 laws each. And if we write them all down, we will practically fill all the empty spaces.
What else should we include in the fundamental spiritual laws of life, without which spiritual growth and full-fledged success in life are impossible?
KINDNESS AND COMPASSION!
Don't pass by someone who is hurting. Help good people and do good for others.
FORGIVENESS!
Don't hold grudges. Not on anyone and never. Learn to forgive. How many times should I forgive? Leo Tolstoy answered: And if you decide to stop drinking, how many times will you say “no” when they bring you a glass?
HONOR YOUR ANCESTORS!
This is believed to prolong your life on earth. Love your parents and grandparents.
GENEROSITY!
We fight greed and greed. Not being attached to things. After all, human life is short. Everything will come back, there is no other way. Don't doubt it!
HUMILITY! NO VANITY!
All people are equal. There are no those who are higher or lower. Each soul has its own experience in this life. There is one God in each of us. We are all one! There is no point in showing and proving something to each other and showing off your coolness.
If we can prove something, it is only to ourselves and to the One who created us and the world around us. Do the best you can, and everything else is out of your control.
DILIGENCE AND PATIENCE!
In any business, haste does not lead to good. Never give up, go forward, albeit slowly, but step by step.
HAPPINESS HERE AND NOW!
Stop being sad and whining. Everything is really good. Everything is really good, no matter what happens in your life. Everything is fine! Stay calm always.
Find happiness within yourself and then you will find it in everything around you and life will smile at you. Yes, you’ve known all this for a long time, right!? But what good is knowledge that is not applied? Look, the thousand-year-old scriptures say the same thing. And you are probably all looking for something else.
PURITY!
I would include here not only purity as such, but also, for example, gluttony, or, as it is written in the Bible, gluttony. That is, cleanliness of the stomach. We live for the soul, not for the body. The body will die, the soul will not.
Keep your body clean, both outside and inside. Watch what you eat and how much.
SOBRIETY AND DRUG FREEDOM!
What else can I add here? Stop drinking, smoking and whatever else you use.
The ABCs of Politeness
- When meeting, they introduce: a man to a woman, those younger in age and position to the elders, those who came later to those already present. In this case, the person you introduce the stranger to is mentioned first, and the person you introduce is mentioned second. “Anna, meet me - this is Konstantin,” “Sergey Ivanovich, this is Marina.”
- When introducing people, it is appropriate to give brief “information” about them: “This is my friend Nikita, he is a surgeon,” “This is my institute friend Natalya.” This way you will make it clear what kind of relationship you have with each of your interlocutors, and provide them with a topic for conversation in your absence: “...So, you are a doctor?”
- The first to greet: men are women, those younger in age and position are older.
- But whoever you are - a director, an academician, an elderly woman or a schoolboy - when entering the room, say hello first.
- When two married couples meet, the women greet each other first, then the men greet the ladies, then the men greet each other.
- person to shake hands is the person to whom the stranger was introduced, that is, the woman to the man, the elder to the younger, and so on. According to the rules of business etiquette, the leader is always the first to offer his hand. Even if the subordinate is a woman.
- If you are given a hand to shake and you are sitting, stand up.
- Before shaking hands, the man takes off his glove. A woman does not have to do this.
- Do not smoke while shaking hands. If you can't throw away your cigarette, apologize for it.
- If your hands are busy with something, a handshake is inappropriate. Greet people with heavy bags or a baby in their arms with a smile and a nod to avoid awkwardness and fuss.
- in the restroom .
- Only married women kiss their hand as a sign of greeting and only indoors. It is not customary to kiss women's hands at business meetings and official events.
- When kissing a woman's hand, lean in rather than pull your hand up towards you.
- If you are walking with someone and your companion says hello to a stranger, you should say hello too.
- On the street, a man should walk to the left of a woman. Only military personnel can walk on the right and must be ready to perform a military salute.
- When going down the stairs, a man walks one or two steps ahead of a woman, and when going up, he walks one or two steps behind.
- No matter who you are, always hold the door for those following you.
- Never turn around when someone calls you “Hey, you!”
- Never point your finger at a person.
- When talking with someone you don’t know well, you shouldn’t touch on personal topics: “How much do you earn?”, “I heard your wife is sick?”, “Do you believe in God?” Good topics for casual conversation: sports, weather, cooking, pets, art, science, travel and the like.
- In an effort to show off your erudition, do not overdo it. Phrases like “I’ve known this for a long time,” “We found something to surprise you with,” and the like will only alienate your interlocutor.
Changing lives
What is happiness?
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Do you think that happiness is an expensive car, a bank account or a high position? No, this is far from true. The feeling of happiness is completely unrelated to these factors. How many rich people are actually very unhappy, they give up their business and go to live far away in the outback. Or some tramp who walks through the park in simple and inexpensive clothes may feel like the happiest person in the entire Universe.
Therefore, the main thing is how to change yourself from the inside. It is impossible to become happy if you simply move to another city or change your occupation, since your old problems will not go away. This will continue until you want and begin to change, until you feel harmony and joy within yourself.
Conclusion
- Modern etiquette, as we understand it today, is a set of unwritten rules.
- They are not mandatory, but they contribute to both respect from others and increased authority in one’s own eyes.
- With some degree of convention, the rules of conduct are divided depending on the place of residence of a person, the type of his professional activity or status.
- Currently, many of the rules of etiquette are questioned or simply not followed, which becomes a reaction to the rapid change in social norms.
Rules of business communication
Respect the other person's time
Time is the most important resource. The day of many entrepreneurs is literally scheduled by the hour; even a minute late can shift the entire schedule of a business person. Therefore, never be late! It is better to come to the meeting early and wait than to come up with ridiculous excuses. If you have trouble with this, learn the basics of time management, it should help.
Learn to listen and hear
Do you know what the most important rule is taught to future psychologists at the institute? The ability to listen and hear the interlocutor. This rule can be applied in any other field of activity. Whether you're negotiating a contract, meeting a new partner, meeting with a supplier for the first time, listening to a dissatisfied customer, or reprimanding a careless employee, always include these two skills. Remember that, by and large, every person always talks about himself - his desires, plans, dreams. Give him a chance to speak, don't interrupt. As a result, you will definitely hear something that will help you find the further direction of the conversation and understand your interlocutor.
Learn to listen to your interlocutor
Speak competently
Who would like to listen to a speech peppered with endless “uh”, “well”, “in short”, “as if”? Verbal garbage is found even among the smartest educated people - these are more likely habits than illiteracy. A business person simply needs to get rid of this shortcoming.
Competent speech will also be needed when writing business letters. It is clear that this mission can be entrusted to a secretary or deputy - but sooner or later you will have to master written communication yourself.
Train your diction
Remember the movie “The King’s Speech” about how the English King George VI got rid of his stuttering? Even the monarch understood that he needed to fight his disability and hired a speech therapist. If you have diction defects - burr, lisp, stuttering - get rid of them with the help of a specialist and live in peace.
Telephone Ethics
Oh, this is a whole layer of business etiquette! Despite the development of Internet negotiations, telephone calls still remain the most popular method of communication. Let us recall the basic rules of communication:
- say hello, call the interlocutor by name and patronymic, introduce yourself;
- say what company you represent;
- ask if it is convenient for your interlocutor to speak;
- if convenient, briefly describe the purpose of the call;
- arrange a meeting or other development of events;
- end the conversation.
Rules for telephone conversation
If telephone conversations are important to you, we advise you to prepare for them in advance: think through the main points of the conversation, options for the development of events. And, of course, it is unacceptable to indulge in lengthy arguments or empty chatter : this will create an unfavorable impression of you.
Ethics of business correspondence
A business letter (electronic and regular) must meet certain standards. First of all, it must be written on company letterhead (or with an appropriate header at the beginning, which indicates the company name, logo, sender’s details and contact details). Next is to match a certain type. Business letters are divided into the following types:
- request letter: you ask something from a partner, client or other organization;
- letter-message: carries an informational load, it is not necessary to respond to it - just take note;
- cover letter: usually an explanation or addition to other documents;
- reminder letter about pending and expected actions;
- invitation letter - to a meeting, conference or any event;
- letter of gratitude: well, everything is clear here.
Experienced entrepreneurs do not confuse the types of letters: they do not start extensive correspondence in response to message letters and, on the contrary, do not respond to reminder letters.
Another rule is to respond to emails as soon as possible. The acceptable time frame for responding to electronic correspondence is 1-2 days. For a postal letter - no more than 10 days.
And, of course, you need to follow the rules of politeness:
- addressing you by name and patronymic;
- no slang words;
- no complicated terms: speak the recipient’s language;
- precise formulations of the purpose of the letter, do not let your thoughts wander;
- mandatory number and signature.
Structure of a business letter
Rules of communication on the Internet
Have you noticed that business communication has partially moved to instant messengers and social networks? Many people find it more convenient to communicate this way: it is more informal and convenient for both parties. Despite the myth about freedom of communication on the Internet, business people must still follow a number of rules:
- don't be familiar. Even if your interlocutor is registered on the social network as Kostyan the PR man or Murochka Anyutochka, address him by his first name and patronymic, as expected;
- There is also no need to overuse emoticons: one or two are quite enough;
- Even if you want to highlight especially important thoughts with a capslock, don’t do it! Large letters are perceived on the Internet as a shout and often cause a negative reaction;
- study the information on the person’s page. This is what’s good about social networks: you can understand a lot about a person by what posts he posts on his wall, what he reposts, and what he talks about.
Many people are concerned about the question: what is the best way to communicate in the 21st century? People are so different: some people find it more convenient to call, while others hate telephone conversations and consider them a violation of personal boundaries. There is only one way to find out what type your interlocutor is: ask him directly. At the first communication (no matter how it happened), ask how he is comfortable communicating. And the question will be closed.
Rules of communication on social networks