Flirting between a man and a woman is generally considered to be a form of courtship used by one or both of them to demonstrate sexual behavior. There is a common point of view that flirting is not communication or words with hints, but primarily non-verbal communications: glances, gestures. It all comes down to flirtatiousness, that is, to a person’s desire to please a member of the opposite sex.
How can you tell if a person is flirting? How to learn to flirt? The answers to these and other questions are presented in the article. We have also given several interesting examples of how you should not behave, but how you should behave in order to become a successful person in flirting.
What is flirting from a psychological point of view?
In psychology, flirting as a form of behavior is considered primarily as a set of signals associated with the courtship of one partner after another. These signals are a way to show interest in a partner, including a potential one. It is generally accepted that flirting is closely associated with the expectation of sexual relations or with a hint of them. Flirting has a place both in relationships and outside of them. The sympathy of one subject for another often manifests itself in flirting.
Compliments, explicit jokes, “accidental” touches - all this can mean that a person is flirting. Even ambiguous phrases, the subtext and context of which may be obvious but veiled, even a sly smile - all this is what can be flirting.
The article discusses flirting in general, without reference to sexual relationships, without restrictions in terms of non-verbal signals only. We do not consider the classical definition to be valid in all situations.
Do you support the view that flirting is always about sexual relations?
No, it seems to me, like you, somewhat limited.
37.5%
Yes. Otherwise, why bother flirting with someone?
50%
Can not say. I still don’t fully understand what we’re talking about. I will read the article further.
12.5%
Voted: 8
Touch
They are used for tactile contact, which gradually brings you closer together, breaking down the wall between you. Touching can be special or random. If there are no accidental touches, try to touch him on purpose: as if accidentally touch his hand with your hand. It is thanks to such timid touches that further touches develop.
Sit closer under some excuse. Remember an interesting incident and invite your companion to watch a video or photo on your mobile phone. Under the appropriate pretext, you can also look at his photographs. Looking at photos on your mobile phone is a great excuse to naturally put your hand on his shoulder or lean your head on him.
Signs of flirting
How can you tell if a person is flirting? Just. There is an opinion according to which flirting signals are divided into 2 groups. They are described below.
- The first group includes signals associated with verbal and non-verbal acts of human behavior. Flirting, for example, if we consider it in the context of flirting, in this case it will be expressed by gestures, touches, and glances. A detailed example is “playing” with the eyes. You understand what we're talking about, right? This is when, for example, a woman looks at a man, waits for him to notice, and then immediately looks away. If this gesture is accompanied by a smile, we can definitely talk about flirting.
- The second group includes signals that a person expresses through his own appearance and smell. It's about a woman choosing an attractive outfit for a date with a man. This is about the fact that, while getting ready for the same date, the man remembered that he has perfume that smells very tasty.
There are also uncontrollable reactions of the body.
Here are some specific examples:
- a woman straightens her hair, pointing her face down and exposing her neck without protection;
- dilated pupils of a man;
- woman licking lips;
- short glances at the object of sympathy;
- copying each other's body position and gestures when flirting.
Flirting can express serious intentions, but sometimes it is just a way to attract a partner as a one-time activity, for example, just for personal pleasure. Pleasure and joy during flirting are tied to the fact that during any of the cases listed in the list, adrenaline begins to be produced in the body of either a man or a woman. The level of hormones increases, which gives people not only joy, but also pleasant excitement.
What do you think are the most understandable signals displayed by a flirting person?
Verbal. The verbal expression of something will always be the most understandable.
0%
It seems to me that they are non-verbal. Body language is sometimes much richer than words and phrases.
40%
I think our body gives us away. All these dilated pupils, slight trembling, uncertainty and excitement - this is what best speaks of intentions or feelings.
60%
Voted: 5
How to flirt to get someone interested?
Do you know the feeling of tightness in your stomach, dry mouth, sweaty palms? If you are worried about expressing sympathy to a man, then you need to practice flirting. Fears and internal complexes exhaust both partners.
Some general useful flirting tips:
- turn on a positive attitude. Flirt with enthusiasm, not fear! Aren't you interested in how it all ends? ;);
- smile at your interlocutor. It is contagious and makes your face more attractive;
- Make eye contact immediately. Make sure your gaze is gentle and friendly;
- use accessories that will “include” you and your partner: delicious perfume, a bright shawl, unusual jewelry;
- Don’t forget about your appearance: well-groomed hair, lips and nails. If you have serious intentions, take care of your outfit;
- move gracefully and smoothly, leave sudden movements for later.
Sight
Eye contact is very important. You can flirt with your gaze and use it as a powerful tool. After all, you can look from under the eyebrows, long and persistently. You can glance over your shoulder. You can look at a man embarrassed, with interest. If you look down, a man will pay attention to his lips. They should have a slight smile and red lipstick (but the latter is not necessary ;) ).
Max Liss, author of the book “Flirting: Secrets of Easy Victories” writes: “Looking into a man’s eyes, mentally say: “You are so wonderful!” This move will count.”
Talk
Learn to keep the conversation casual. Flirting is not about discussing scientific research or the latest technology. General topics that are pleasant to both companions will do. Talk about your latest travels, favorite music, movies. Don't talk too much and chaotically, let the man speak. But don’t arrange an interrogation either. Let everyone open up as much as they see fit.
Arguments, aggression and criticism are not the allies of flirting. And compliments - yes! Don't underestimate nice words. Men like to be praised. Nice words will help the ice between you melt faster.
It has been shown that 87% of men are aroused by a woman's slightly open mouth, especially with her head tilted towards the interlocutor. You can use this technique when you listen to him!
