How to interest a girl via correspondence on VK, dating sites: topics, examples

If someone knew how to make a girl fall in love by correspondence, this sacred knowledge would most likely be carved in stone and hidden in a secret safe.

We hope that you, like us, understand perfectly well that there are no universal phrases that will help make anyone feel feelings for anyone. But there are secrets of productive and successful communication that we will now share with you.

With them, your chances of the match turning into dating, and then into a relationship, will increase significantly.

How to pick up a girl by correspondence

Correspondence is a unique way of communication. You can think through every word in advance, get advice from a friend before sending a reply, or take a break to think about your next SMS.

At the initial stage of communication, we advise you to adhere to some rules that will allow you to achieve quick contact:

Be polite. Wish the girl good morning or evening. At the end of the dialogue, when saying goodbye, wish you a good day or good night.
Write an original compliment or an offer to communicate. Indicate the reason why you singled out the stranger online.
Don't stretch the rubber. Say right away that you want to meet and have a nice conversation.
Don't be rude, don't be rude. Don't confuse assertiveness, which girls like, with rudeness. Choose polite expressions, a calm tone and rhythm of conversation.
Carefully inquire about your marital status and whether you have a boyfriend. Don't ask the question directly. A girl can lie to show her popularity with the opposite sex.
Ask about hobbies.
Do not write as carbon copies or stamps, avoid clichés.
Forget about the phrases: “Hi, how are you?”, “Yesterday I met an angel...”, “Does your mother need a son-in-law?” A cute girl receives hundreds of such messages and has long stopped responding to them. It's cheesy and boring. You must be an original person.
Give compliments. Beautifully praise the appearance of the interlocutor, her photo, interests.
Try to evoke positive emotions and a smile. You can joke, but in moderation, tease, play pranks, if the girl has a good sense of humor. Give virtual gifts with comments, emoticons, and upload funny videos.

Fifth stage. Show you care

This should be done after all stages of seduction have been completed. You showed that you can be interesting, funny, brutal. But if you went too far in something, then she may perceive you as an ordinary sociopath. Show her that you can take care of someone too.

If it’s winter, then write: “You know, it’s so cold outside, I need to go and buy you gloves and a scarf.”
If she asks how you are doing, then you don’t need to tell all the details of the past day. She's not interested. With such questions, she hints that she is bored and you should cheer her up.
Find out what country she wants to go to and start dreaming: what would you take, how would you go there, what would you do there. Such a conversation will evoke positive emotions and a romantic mood.

Successful themes

It is useful for guys to know what topics they can talk about with a girl. There are quite a lot of them, choose one from the list presented and don’t be afraid to make mistakes. You can change the topic in the chat at any time, the girl herself will tell you what interests her more.

Psychology of relationships
Hobbies, interests of a woman
Achievements in life, at work
What is love and does it exist?
Films, actors
Art (painting, music)
Rest
Questions about the past: when I first fell in love, school friends
Flowers: which ones you like, which ones you don’t?
Travel dreams
Books
Life goals
Dreams, their meaning
Favorite cafe, club

As soon as the topic has exhausted itself, switch the dialogue to another. At the same time, you should not show boredom in discussions or answer in monosyllables. Show real interest, ask questions, react violently to the girl’s emotional outbursts or stories about her secret past.

Who has more chances

When the desire arises “I want to win the most beautiful girl in the city,” and you are an ordinary guy, then most likely there is no chance. In addition, it is worth considering that a young man who stands out above the gray mass, is more attractive or wealthy, or simply has a big heart will achieve greater success.

If we consider the situation in general, then the opportunity to conquer any girl will be greater for the following categories of men.

Smart

Educated gentlemen attract the attention of successful ladies more. They want to see such a man as a husband. Interesting

Guys who are easy to spend time with and who might interest you. Attractive. Men who take care of themselves, have good hair, dress nicely, and take care of personal hygiene. Cheerful. Young men with a great sense of humor who are optimistic about the future have an advantage over other guys. Wealthy and successful. Girls will also be interested in the possibility of material wealth and well-being. Strong. A woman will begin to look for a man behind whom she can feel safe, like behind a stone wall. Self-confident. Women are attracted to goal-oriented men. They are not interested in whiners who are incapable of normal action.

Message templates

How to write to a girl on VK, Instagram to meet her. Use the following unusual phrases and ready-made message samples:

I look at your photo and don’t understand why you are so sad. I can help you with something, want to have some fun?

I noticed your account and couldn’t pass it by. May I give you a few compliments?

You probably have a lot of fans, can I join them?

I noticed that you are interested in the same music as me. I have a recording of the latest album (name of artist, group), should I share?

I enjoy traveling. Judging by your photos, you do too. Where were you last? Will you tell me?

You have so many friends on social networks! Surely you are a wonderful person.

Looking at your photo, it seems to me that we knew each other in real life? Where we could see each other, let's remember together.

I want to make an unexpected proposal: let's be friends!

Third stage. Make her think only about you

"Hello! I don’t ask what you’re doing, because I already know. You're thinking about me, right?" This question implies that the girl has fallen head over heels in love and thinks only about you all day long. She will be hooked, and she will definitely answer that this is not so.
“Today you were able to cheer me up, it’s not that easy. You're witty. Keep up the good work." By doing this you will show your sympathy, set her apart from the crowd of others and program her to try even harder to be interesting to you. If you like her behavior, praise her. If you don't like it, scold it. Know the value of your time and be confident in your own abilities.
Response to a negative message (refusal, unpleasant words): “Okay, I’ll take away ten points from you.” Questions will immediately arise: “What kind of balls? Are you exposing them to everyone?” This will clearly show her that you are the one giving her an assessment, looking closely at whether it is worth further courtship. This means she should try to be better, and not vice versa. You tell her what exactly you didn’t like, and she will try not to repeat it again. Another plus of this message is that, unlike others, you don’t worry about any nonsense.
If a lady is frozen by the meeting, write: “You know, one beauty doesn’t want to see me. Of course it’s strange, but I like her.” In one phrase there is immediately humor, a compliment, a desire to meet and no pressure. This will melt the ice and she will become more accommodating.

Errors

When starting to communicate with a nice person via the Internet, many guys want to seem more brutal, more experienced and make a lot of mistakes. We list the most common of them:

The first message is written banally, like everyone else. Phrases: “Hello!”, “Let’s get to know each other!”, “How are you?”, “What are you doing?” cause women to be rejected, and they ignore SMS.
For dating on VK, WhatsApp and other social networks, they use fake pages and someone else’s ava. Starting a conversation with a lie is in itself absurd. And girls are very sensitive to deception. Even if you manage to intrigue a stranger now, nothing good awaits you in the future.
They talk sadly about past love relationships, exes, failures in life. It’s definitely not worth causing tears of pity from a stranger during the first conversation; your task is to hook the lady, to interest her in an original way, to arouse feelings of sympathy in her.
They write too long, flowery letters without a clear meaning. This is how you can communicate with an old friend, girlfriend, mother, but not with a girl you are supposed to like. There is no need to quote poets, talk tediously about trifles, or answer questions at length. Otherwise, it seems that you are a narcissistic macho, looking for an object for recognition of his beauty or intelligence.
They use slang that is completely incomprehensible to the interlocutor. It’s good if you have a common circle of acquaintances and similar interests, then special words and jargon will be clear in the dialogue. And if not. Then the girl will be confused, she will have to ask again what you mean. This makes it difficult to get to know each other and get used to each other.
They become familiar without permission, become familiar, and forget to say hello. Respect the boundaries between being off-hand and being intimate. You shouldn’t address an almost unknown girl as “Kisulya, Lapulya, Irishka, Marinochka” until the lady gives permission. A sharp reduction in distance frightens young people and pushes them away.
They write SMS with emoticons. Emotional faces are a great invention, but don't go to extremes. For love correspondence, words and hints are much more important. A real compliment will make a much more impression on a lady than 10 kisses and 5 braces.
They get bored with messages and impose themselves on you. End communication if the girl clearly refuses to meet you or does not respond to SMS for several days.
They don’t know what to write to a girl on VK and use standard phrases. Learn to flirt, get acquainted, practice more on Tinder, on Mamba. Then it will be interesting to correspond with you.
Hints of intimacy, virtual, invitation to a real meeting in the first correspondence. Be careful with compliments. “Your breasts are so big, wow!” — decent girls respond to such an enthusiastic message by blocking the interlocutor’s account.
Mat in speech. Girls don't like poorly educated, uncultured guys. Your messages should be beautiful and pleasant to read.
Grammatical and spelling errors in SMS. Illiteracy is easy to hide during oral conversation, but in correspondence 2 and 3 in the Russian language at school become visible to everyone. Brush up on your humanitarian knowledge, it will be useful not only in correspondence with beauties.

What to write to a girl - 250 phrases for all occasions

What does the ideal start to dating look like? It’s enough to say or ask something interesting or pleasant from your new interlocutor. Believe me, the right phrase will help start a dialogue even with the most unapproachable lady. If your imagination produces only the most banal options for communication, then the TOP popular phrases will come to the rescue. Today we will find out what you can write to a girl.

What thoughts do you have before going to bed?
It seems to me that you have some kind of zest. Can you tell me which one exactly?
What character trait are you proud of?
Can you be a bad girl sometimes?
How about compliments addressed to you?
What reckless act do you dream of?
Name just three words that can describe you.
Your photos have settled on my desktop. When will I see you live?
Do you often embellish events in life?
What does your ideal vacation look like?
Do you have a vulgar touch?
What alcoholic cocktail can I treat you to when we meet?
Wow! You look simply stunning! Will you share the secret of your attractiveness?
Describe the man of your dreams. I would like to claim this title.
What do you prefer to remain silent about when talking?
What profession have you always dreamed of?
If I become a goldfish, what wish will you make for me?
Tell me, how do you maintain such an appetizing figure?
What do you mean by “love”?
What is your deepest dream?
What do you like to watch on YouTube?
You have amazing shape. Is this a gift of nature or the result of the work of a plastic surgeon?
Is it possible to be so beautiful?
I would like to hear some kind of confession from you.
What country would you like to live in? Can you explain your choice?
How often do you have indecent fantasies?
What do you value most in men?
Would you like to kiss me?
Tell me how can I win your heart?
What are your plans for this weekend? I have a tempting offer for you...
What kind of pets do you love?
Do you love lace lingerie?
Have you ever wanted to perform on stage?
What is your favorite holiday? Maybe we can celebrate it together?
You are so beautiful and sociable. I think you have a blog on the Internet. This is true?
How do you feel about plastic surgery?
Will you be a jealous wife?
What's the most curious thing that happened to you?
What do you pay attention to when you first meet?
What advice would you give to yourself?
Do you remember your first love?
What is the first thing you will tell about yourself when you meet someone?
What does “happiness” mean to you?
What people inspire you?
Your eyes can seduce any man. How many hearts have you already broken?
Do you trust your intuition?
What action have you ever been ashamed of?
What movie can I give you a movie ticket to? Only condition: let's go together.
Which movie or cartoon character are you most like?
Judging by your audio recordings, you have good taste in music. Can you send me a link to your favorite song?

Were you able to choose what to write to a girl when you met her? No? Let's move on!

How do you like to spend your weekends?
What do you think about most often on a first date?
What do you want to become in your next life?
What kind of life do you dream about after marriage?
Can you keep secrets?
How do you feel about morning jogging? Maybe I'll keep you company?
How do you feel about bad guys?
Have you ever looked through a keyhole?
Are you an active person?
Do you have ridiculous dreams?
I'll just say a few words: you are a very beautiful girl. I dream about a date with you.
What can always make you smile?
Do you have strange fantasies?
What time of year do you love most?
How about living without the Internet for a week?
What are your plans for the next 5 years?
What can I do to make you smile?
Do you have strange habits?
What is the most important goal in your life?
What are you dreaming about at the moment?
Which writer or musician's work do you prefer?
Do you like to dress up?
Have you ever been wooed by a secret admirer?
How do you feel about women's initiative in relationships?
What show do you like to watch?
What do you like to sleep in?
Don't plan anything for the evening. I'm inviting you on a date. You agree?
Do you like jokes and humor?
Is there friendship between a man and a woman?
It seems we met somewhere. Would you answer? I've been trying to remember for several days now.
What good and bad habits do you have?
What would you like to change about yourself?
Can lies bring good?
What decision in life was the most difficult for you?
Are there places where you feel most relaxed?
What are you ready to talk about? What topics are best taboo?
Do you have a lot of friends?
What was the most worthy act in your life?
What funny story do you remember most often?
How often do men court you?
Can you seduce me?
What dreams do you see most often?
Do you have photos from the “18+” series?
Do you think miracles happen?
Do you like to show off in front of the mirror?
Describe your appearance and character in a few words.
Can you be called jealous?
How do you like to spend your evenings?
Do you have a favorite activity?
What games do you prefer?

What to write to a girl? 250 working phrases

Have you still not decided what to write to your girl? Then we continue our TOP phrases for dating.

Which member of your household is closest to you?
If you were told that the world would end in 24 hours, how would you spend that time?
Which celebrity would you like to marry?
Is luck on your side?
Do you read the horoscope? Who are you according to your zodiac sign?
How many children would you like to have?
What can ruin your mood?
Do you believe in true female friendship?
Do you have any tattoos on your body?
What topic can you talk about for hours?
Did you laugh about pistils and stamens in biology class?
Do you consider yourself a shopaholic?
Do you prefer to command or live by someone else's rules?
Did you do well at school?
What are you most afraid of in the future?
Would you agree to become a kept woman?
What book have you read recently?
Do you remember your first love?
What about your appearance are you most proud of?
Are you for stability or dynamism?
Where do you dream of going in the near future?
Could you survive on a desert island?
What advice do you remember most often in life?
Do you think there is life after death?
Who do you take your example from in life?
Do you have a nickname or pet nickname?
Have you ever gone out without underwear?
How do you feel about dancing?
What quote do you remember most often?
What would you not do even for a lot of money?
What is your proudest moment?
Would you like to see your photo on the cover of a magazine?
Can you recommend what I can watch or read?
Do you often pamper yourself?
Have you ever been a volunteer?
What is your most vulnerable spot?
How often do you become the object of funny situations?
What plans do you have for your life?
There are five senses: smell, touch, sight, taste, hearing. Which of these feelings would be easier for you to let go of?
Do you remember your most rash act?
What does an ideal family life look like?
What's the meanest thing you've ever done? I promise I won't judge you.
What do you love to do most? I'd like to keep you company.
Have you been having an affair with your friend's boyfriend?
Would you like to fly in a hot air balloon?
You have a great figure. What sport do you do?
What has upset you lately?
Do you like sweets? I can make awesome ice cream.
Would you like to spend the next weekend with me?
Can you be called the queen of flirting?

We hope you have already chosen at least a couple of options for what to write to a girl? Let's continue! There are still many interesting questions ahead.

Do you have unique abilities?
What are you most afraid of?
What's the worst thing you've ever done in your life?
Ever made a wish list?
Do you like active or passive recreation?
Can you give me any advice?
Who do you share your deepest thoughts with?
Are you talking to yourself?
What can always lift your spirits?
Who has an easier life - a man or a woman?
What stupid things do you always find time for?
What urgently needs to change in the modern world?
What would you spend your huge winnings on?
Do you cry at movies?
Do you like to get up early?
How do you feel about bearded men? Or do you prefer to cuddle up to a man's shaved cheek?
What have your past relationships taught you?
What superpowers would you like to have?
What adventure or trip do you still remember?
What do you mean by sin?
What's the craziest thing you've done after a wild party?
Have you ever received unusual gifts?
Can you forgive betrayal?
Do you like to plan everything or do you prefer improvisation?
What clothes will you choose for your first date?
Do you have personal rules that you never break?
Have you swum in the sea or river at night?
Would you like to get into show business?
What is your dream movie role?
How do you feel about unequal marriages?
Are you afraid of your future?
What are your positive character traits?
Would you agree to kiss a stranger?
Do you need romance in a relationship?
Do you think about the meaning of life?
Who will be in charge in your future family?
Do you have phobias that you are embarrassed to tell your friends about?
Do you use profanity?
What holiday are you looking forward to the most?
What to write to a girl when meeting her, in your opinion?
Do you love taking selfies?
What is your fondest memory from childhood?
Could you dance a frank dance for the man you love?
What gift would you like to receive?
Where did you study after school?
What smell do you enjoy?
Do you have determination and perseverance?
What mistakes in life would you like to correct?
What gift of fate do you dream of?
Does your wardrobe easily fit into one closet?

What to write to a girl when meeting her to make her like you right away

And the TOP phrases for dating don’t end there! There is also a whole list of options for what to write to a girl.

How many children would you like to have? Do you dream of a son or a sweet daughter?
What topics do you not like to discuss?
What will make you forget about everything?
What's your favorite dessert? If you answer honestly, then I will treat you.
Have you ever kept a personal diary?
What is your main weapon when conquering a man's heart?
Are you easily offended?
Do you trust people?
How do you feel about social networks?
Where do you like to spend your free time?
Do you often use cosmetics? It seems to me that you don’t need it, you have natural beauty.
What talents could you boast of?
Can you cook?
Do you sometimes show insolence?
Do you like to be photographed? Maybe you can send me a couple of your best pictures?
Do you know how to ask for forgiveness?
Who do you think you were in a past life?
Who do you always remember with a kind word?
Do you like to stand out among people?
What do you need to be happy?
What can you do with all your free time?
What profession did you dream of as a child?
How do you see your old age?
Is there a story about you that your friends always talk about?
Where can I kiss you?
What attracts you to men externally and internally?
How do you feel about creativity?
Would you like to know what people are talking about behind your back?
Would you like to change your name?
Are you able to change for the sake of your loved one?
Are you naturally sentimental?
What animals or phenomena are you afraid of?
What would you like to change in your life?
Do you have any enemies?
Do you have a self-development plan?
What song do you like to sing in a karaoke club?
What would you do with the 25th hour of the day?
Do you have real friends with whom you can go through fire, water, and copper pipes?
What composition makes you move right away?
Which celebrity would you like to meet in person?
What will improve your mood even on the cloudiest day?
What do you often remember from the past?
Do you order food at home?
Have you ever been in a fight?
What kind of person knows almost everything about you?
Can you lie to a loved one?
What do you value most in people?
What was the reason for your last tears?
Do you know how to take revenge?
What is your spirit animal?

Preparation of the questionnaire

Before writing to a girl, prepare a profile on a dating site:

There should not be a lot of personal information.
Please indicate your real age.
Don't hide your marital status. Marriage, a relationship with another girl cannot be hidden. This will definitely come out during communication, so why ruin the beginning of the relationship, it will be difficult to regain trust. So write that you are disappointed in your soulmate and are in search, but have not yet broken off past ties.
Real photo on the avatar. At the same time, remove photos from your profile that create a negative image (drunk, with a sloppy background, with a naked torso).

Why tackles and pickups no longer work

If you type into Google “how you can interest a girl,” you usually come across a bunch of resources that teach pickup. This trend arose a long time ago, but all kinds of tackles became widespread just a few years ago. I went to such sites and studied basic pickup tips. Let me briefly tell you what the problem is here.

Essentially, any pickup is manipulation. It is based on template phrases, NLP, psychological tricks, a clear sequence of steps... In general, everything in order to make a girl run after you. But we are not robots, and naturally we immediately notice that you have prepared phrases even before meeting us. Any person generally reacts sensitively to falsehood and immediately recognizes it.

This is not to mention the fact that before you, three more guys could have approached this girl with the same “strategy”. Agree, this is tiring and discourages any desire to communicate - even if the sequence of your steps makes sense.

In short, it’s 2021—a time when sincerity and naturalness are valued in every sense. And if you want girls to stop manipulating with tears and complaints, it would be fair for you to remove any “schemes” from communication.

Personal page on social networks

A social media account can say a lot about its owner. If you want to meet a girl online via VK correspondence for a serious relationship or flirting, put your personal page in order.

Set photo. Girls do not respond to SMS from invisible accounts in 99% of cases.
Create several albums with photos and notes. Organize information by interest or date. For example, create an album “My Hobby”, “My Friends”, “Family”, a folder with quotes from books, wisdom. Girls are attracted to men who engage in sports and intellectual self-development.
Use a recent image as your main photo. It is better if you are alone in the photo, in a decent place (theater, park, at a social gathering).
Clear the like history on your wall. If you constantly comment on photos of women in nude style, vulgar jokes of friends as a status, the girl will see this in the story and is unlikely to want to communicate with such a young man.
Get out of groups that teach seduction. Participation in communities like “Pickup School”, “Dating Masters” on VKontakte, on mail will not add advantages to you. The stranger will feel like a guinea pig for practice.

The result should be a profile that will help you win over a girl, get her on a date, and start a long-term relationship.

Guys in a macho style, wearing sunglasses and with a bare torso look like pickup artists. Posting one photo with family and friends is better than posting a whole album of pictures prepared specifically for online dating.

Anton Glamozda, a trainer for personal growth and comprehensive training of men, gives advice on how to interest a girl in VK and on dating sites and where to start correspondence:

How to interest a girl in order to attract her attention?

In this block we talk about the qualities that need to be improved in order to attract attention and interest. First, understand one simple thing: if you can’t get girls interested now, then you’ll have to change something. These changes may not be easy - the result depends on your persistence and level of self-knowledge. We will provide a complete list, but you are free to choose the appropriate items yourself.

Another important point: remember that women are people too. Accordingly, in order to become more attractive to them, you will need to become, in principle, a more interesting and communicative person. This does not mean that lines of gays will follow you. This means that first of all, universal personal qualities and communication skills are improved, and only then behavioral strategies regarding girls appear.

So, here's what you need to take care of:

Appearance. They always greet you by their clothes - remember? The first opinion about a person is formed in 7 seconds. You may not even have time to speak, and during this time the person is already deciding whether he is interested in at least saying hello to you. Appearance should be neat, well-groomed and attractive. To achieve this, take care of three aspects:

Cloth. It should be clean and ironed, modern and stylish. Being confident in casual wear is often enough, but you are free to experiment with your look if you are confident in your sense of style.
Body type. It is not necessary to have the figure of a seasoned athlete or bodybuilder. But the absence of excess weight, a muscular corset and posture will make absolutely any person more attractive.
Skin and hair. A couple of decades ago you didn’t have to worry about this at all, but now more and more men are trying to take care of themselves. To withstand the competition, get a stylish haircut, tidy up your beard, if you have one, and choose facial products that suit your skin type. This is not as difficult as it might seem, and the requirements for the appearance of men are still much less than for the body of girls. Remember hygiene, take care of your hair, facial skin, hands and feet.

Mind. Intelligence and outlook are important things for communication. Looking good but not joining the growing ranks of smart people won't give you much of a chance to have long, enjoyable interactions. In the era of Google, not studying is at least suspicious. It doesn't matter what exactly you are passionate about. It's important to be passionate about what you do and be curious about current social trends.
Confidence. Another important parameter, without which communication is not impossible, but difficult. You can choose a lively girl who will be touched by shyness. But everyone loves healthy self-confidence.
Communication skills. Active listening, the ability to remain silent at the right time, speak at the right time, flirt masterfully, ask at the right time or tell a story will make you more attractive, even if you missed the first points. But manners and communication skills most often go hand in hand with intelligence. Develop them together: it will be easier and more effective.
Respect. To yourself and the people around you. Without respect for yourself, you will not begin to like yourself - you don’t have to think about girls here for now. To feel your value to others, you must first believe in it yourself. Respect for others protects you from rudeness and meanness, which is also an undoubted and very big plus.
Determination. This is a little more than self-confidence: you not only realize your right to different actions, but also successfully implement it. Not a critical parameter, but determined people usually achieve more.
The desire for self-development. It is not enough to read ten or twenty books and scour the last months of news from scientific sources.
You should always be interested and strive for more. Try it and start with an interesting area. You will like it yourself