“People meet, people fall in love, get married. I’m so unlucky in this that it’s just a disaster,” is sung in a famous Soviet-era hit. The song was sung a long time ago, but the problems remained the same: “How to develop a relationship with a girl so as not to break up immediately after meeting?”
The first thing guys need to know is that no relationship begins without mutual sympathy. Yes, a guy may like a girl more than she likes him, but the basis - mutual attraction - is still there. This means that such relationships can be made strong and lasting. How to do it right?
The key to good relationships
In fact, the best way to develop a relationship is to act naturally. No matter how inexperienced a guy or girl is, they instinctively know what to do with the person they like. But when a partner begins to play a role that is unusual for him (the role of a good girl or the role of a passionate male), alas, this will lead the relationship to a dead end. Behaving in an unnatural way for a long time will not work, and when the truth is revealed, you will regretfully realize that you are not the person your partner needs. Or it is possible that you will simply get tired of your acting activity and decide that this girl is not worth the moral and physical effort spent on her. Remember, the most important rule of a good and long relationship is that the relationship should be easy and comfortable for you!
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How to behave on a first date
If a girl agrees to go on a date with you, it is important to consider five basic rules of behavior so as not to disappoint her.
- Find a comfortable place. The meeting should take place without obstacles, calmly and naturally. You can ask the girl’s preferences, but also take into account your own characteristics. For example, if you don't like going on extreme rides, then you won't be able to relax and perform your best at a meeting.
- Help your companion get rid of anxiety and embarrassment. You can compliment her on her appearance and add a sense of humor to the conversation. It is important to choose topics for conversation that are interesting to the girl, and in which she understands no worse than you.
- Act confidently without showing inner anxiety. You can prepare for the date in advance and think through topics that will be interesting to both of you.
- If suddenly the conversation reaches a dead end, it is important to quickly find your bearings and switch to another topic. You can ask about the girl’s occupation, what she is interested in, how she spends her leisure time. It is important not to bring up deeply personal topics on the first date, such as family matters or past relationships.
- Show the girl your interest, be courteous, tactful and gallant, do not use rude words or ridicule in the conversation. The interlocutor will like the kindness, politeness and smiling nature of the gentleman.
You can follow these rules of conduct if you want to transform your relationship with a girl from friendly to romantic. When you meet, surprise your chosen one with a small gift so that she appreciates the generosity of your soul and the seriousness of your intentions.
A bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates or a small souvenir is enough. The main thing is that the gift is inexpensive and non-committal, otherwise the girl may feel awkward.
Distance is not a hindrance
However, with the development of information technology, more and more often young people meet on the Internet in online games, forums, chat rooms, dating sites, etc. Such relationships have their own specifics: often people are in different cities at a great distance from each other, they do not have the opportunity for frequent meetings and dates, and do not have mutual acquaintances.
But even such difficult relationships have a good chance of becoming successful. They also have one significant advantage - often the basis for starting such a relationship is not physical attractiveness, but the presence of common interests. By the time a couple is actually ready to meet in real time, they already know each other’s interests and preferences well, and rare meetings only fuel interest in their partner.
What to talk about on a date
Many men do not worry in advance about how to conduct a conversation with a girl, and often encounter difficulties in communication. I highly recommend coming up with a list of neutral topics to prevent awkward pauses in your meeting. The main topics that both understand include:
- favorite music and films;
- hobbies with which you can surprise your interlocutor and show yourself at your best;
- the girl’s hobby, based on this information you can figure out how to conduct the next meetings;
- the type of activity of each;
- funny stories from childhood that will touch your interlocutor and make the dialogue relaxed.
If a guy notices interest on the part of a girl and sees that they managed to establish contact, you can superficially touch on love topics. For example, find out what character traits are important to her in a man, her views on family life, whether she likes romance, what male habits are unacceptable to her, and so on.
It is forbidden to ask questions of an intimate nature or touch on the topic of former relationships at the first meeting. This can make her angry or put her off.
Relationship stages
Scientists have been trying for a long time to understand what happens between a man and a woman in love. And although not all the secrets in this area were discovered and studied by them, they described the path that absolutely all relationships go through.
- Sympathy. You cannot build mutual love from scratch; already at the initial stage of dating, you should feel sympathy for each other, a desire to be friends and to get to know the person better. Usually, after a month of dating, it is quite easy for young people to answer the question: do you like this person?
- Close acquaintance. At this stage, lovers gradually begin to see each other in a real, earthly light. They get to know their partner’s temperament, character, and behavior patterns better and get the opportunity to think about whether they are ready to come to terms with these characteristics of their other half. Be very careful at this stage: do not deceive yourself with hopes that you can fix something or re-educate your loved one. If you are not ready to accept him completely for who he is, do not expect a bright future in this relationship.
- Adoption. When a couple decides that they are comfortable being together, despite some of the peculiarities of being together with each other, this means that they no longer doubt their choice and are ready to build strong relationships, start a family, and raise children.
- Service. At this stage, the couple is ready to give up their self-centeredness in favor of their partner. Moreover, such an act is not perceived by the victim, but is implied by itself, because now not only one’s own comfort, but also the comfort of the loved one comes to the fore.
- Confidence. By this stage, partners go through many life difficulties, conflicts and trials. They know each other as well as they know themselves. They trust and respect their partner without demanding anything in return.
- Love. The long-awaited fruit of all the efforts that were made to cultivate it: patience, understanding, trust, care. This is not only physical unity, but a connection of souls, bringing peace and harmony to the personality of each partner. All desires and thoughts can be read as if in an open book, and in order to be understood, you don’t have to speak, you can just keep quiet about it and be heard.
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How to behave with a stranger
Guys often have difficulty meeting a woman. Not everyone can immediately make a good impression. Many guys wonder how to approach the girl they like in the subway, cafe or right on the street. For this, psychologists have developed a number of simple rules.
- Finding the right moment. Wait until the girl leaves the restaurant to get some fresh air, you can invite her to dance at the disco, get off with her at the subway stop and start a conversation there.
- Confident behavior. The guy should overcome his inner agitation, speak confidently and act calmly.
- Originality, but without going too far. Not every girl likes phrases like “Does your mother need a son-in-law?” It's much better if you compliment her, introduce yourself and start a simple conversation.
- Deed. You can offer your help, for example, carry a heavy bag, or show your attention and send a cocktail to her table.
- Invitation to a meeting. If a woman is in no hurry, then invite her to a cafe for a cup of coffee or ice cream. Indecisiveness can lead to you losing your only chance to meet this particular woman.
If a girl gave her phone number when meeting, then the guy should clarify when it is convenient to call and keep his word. If your attempts to get acquainted are unsuccessful, do not get angry or upset. Learn to maintain composure, then next time you will definitely be lucky.
Don’t despair and don’t be afraid to make an effort to get acquainted, so as not to regret your inaction later.
What negative male character traits attract girls?
Men can use negative character traits and some bad habits for good and attract women with them.
Selfishness
Women usually like healthy male egoism. They like it when their partner is self-confident, proud, and knows what he wants to achieve in life. A woman thinks that such a man will be able to protect, take care of her and will always achieve any of his goals.
Brutality
Ruthlessness and heartlessness, determination and masculine strength often conquer women's hearts. A man's rudeness does not always tell girls about bad upbringing. Sometimes it seems to them that a rude partner can achieve a lot in life and will never stop halfway. And successful men are always popular with women.
Cunning
Some women like resourceful and cunning men who can emerge victorious from any situation. These ladies are not at all embarrassed that on the way to achieving their goals, their chosen ones will be cunning and manipulate people. Perhaps someone will consider this wrong and stop communicating with the cunning man, but there are women who will immediately trust the leader and will sincerely admire his successes.
Narcissism
A man who admires himself may attract a woman because he exudes confidence. She will be pleased to be in the company of someone who knows her strengths and is not afraid to tell others about them. However, you should not constantly talk only about yourself, otherwise the woman will soon become bored.
How to start respecting yourself
In order not to experience awkwardness and uncertainty when communicating with the opposite sex, I recommend paying attention to six important aspects.
Your achievements
Every man should have achievements that he is proud of. If you doubt the success of something, remember your achievements; they will motivate you to move on. It is important to achieve your goals in order to enjoy a positive result.
Nutrition
To feel your best, eat right. It’s better to cook yourself a salad and steak rather than heat a semi-finished product in the microwave. Try not to eat cheap and low-quality products. This way of eating will negatively affect your mood and health, and take away your strength and energy.
Goals and their implementation
It is important to plan your affairs for the day, month, year and implement your plans. You can break one large-scale goal into several small points and gradually implement them. Set simple goals for yourself, but implement them every day.
Money
Men with small salaries do not feel confident; they cannot even give a bouquet of flowers when meeting a woman. They often consider themselves losers who cannot achieve anything in life. If you are not satisfied with your current income, be sure to change your job. Try something new, don't stick to your usual but low-paying job.
Sport
It is important for a man to pump up his body. To do this, you need to go to the gym, pool, and play your favorite sport. Never miss a workout, achieve results. When a man sees the fruits of his efforts in the mirror, he begins to respect himself.
Beautiful women
Surround yourself only with beautiful women, try not to waste your time. You should admire the person who is next to you. It should be interesting and cool to be with him.
