Man is a social being, but not everyone and not always want to talk to people. If you avoid public places, new acquaintances, and try to spend time alone as much as possible, then this article is for you. Here you will find out why you don’t want to communicate with people and what to do about it.
Causes
If you have no desire to communicate with people , then it’s worth understanding the reasons, let’s look at the most common ones.
- Constriction
There are many shy people who are simply embarrassed to communicate with people, especially strangers. They are not confident in themselves, so they are afraid that they will not like them, they are afraid of criticism and comments.
- Unpleasant interlocutors
If there are no people around you whose intelligence and life principles are close to yours, then it is not surprising that you have no desire to communicate with people. Few people enjoy communicating with a person with completely different views on life.
- Burnout
If you have to communicate a lot with people at work, sooner or later this leads to emotional burnout.
- Introversion
Introverts are people who gain energy not from communicating with other people, but from being alone. They feel comfortable alone and have no need for communication. They are interested in thinking, dreaming, and their own inner world comes first.
- Lack of social skills
Since childhood, we develop social skills when we begin to communicate with other people. But, if at an early age there were problems with socialization, then with a high probability they will continue into adulthood. And even if you are a confident and interesting person, you may simply not be able to carry on a conversation.
Three things you can do
Now that we have sorted out the reasons, a few words about what you can do.
- Write him one message.
I have repeatedly mentioned the so-called (or rather, what I call) One Message. Read more about it here.
Here is a possible version of One Message:
- Take into account the following settings:
- All relationships are temporary.
- All people are replaceable, and so am I.
- I can't change anyone's behavior.
- I am 100% responsible for my emotional reactions.
If you intend these attitudes, it will be much easier for you to cope with any breakups.
- Work through your grievances.
You are on this site for a reason. It's not about your friend. The point is your emotional reaction to the fact that he stopped communicating with you, and even did not explain the reason.
I explained to you what could be the reason for the cessation of resentment. Gave you a recommendation on how to further build communication with your friend. I gave you a couple of instructions that will help you cope with the pain of parting.
But ultimately, the best thing you can do for your emotional balance is not to restore a relationship that has most likely outlived itself, but to change yourself. Stop automatically reacting to other people's behavior. Eliminate your emotional addictions. Stop clinging to relationships that you no longer need.
How to change and stop reacting to everything like that? Start by working through past grievances.
All your past grievances have, to one degree or another, influenced how you react to people's behavior in the present. Past grievances are the key to automatic emotional reactions in the present. They have created a whole set of limiting beliefs, as well as a victim mentality, which can lead to resentment well into adulthood.
The idea that the past is in the past is false. The events are in the past, but the emotional burden of those events has not gone away. All your grievances continue to be stored in your subconscious, causing an automatic emotional response.
Therefore, it is necessary to take on the contents of your subconscious and eliminate all kinds of mental garbage from there - limitations, past grievances and traumas, fears, anxieties, etc.
Read about how exactly to work it out here.
What to do
If you don’t understand why you don’t want to communicate with people and leave the house , then you should understand whether you have apathy and depression. If, in addition to the lack of desire to communicate, you have no desire to do anything at all, then it is worth taking action. This condition can lead to real depression and suicidal thoughts.
If you have never been a sociable person, and you are comfortable being alone, then you should not try to change yourself. You probably have close people with whom you sometimes communicate, and if you feel so comfortable, then you shouldn’t make a problem out of it.
Also, don't worry if you don't want to interact with certain people. This is absolutely normal, and if you are unpleasant or not interested in a person, then you have every right not to communicate with him. If you don't want to communicate with relatives , then you need to know how to behave . It is problematic to completely cut off communication with loved ones, but it is worth minimizing it.
If you avoid communication, but this interferes with your life, and you would like to communicate and meet people, then it is worth taking action. If you realize that it is difficult for you to communicate with people, and you are hampered by embarrassment or lack of social skills, then you need to work on yourself.
The most important thing is practice. You must not miss the opportunity to communicate with someone. It must be remembered that to develop any skill, practice is necessary. At first it will be difficult for you, you will experience anxiety and fear, but over time you will become more and more confident in yourself.
You also need to become an interesting conversationalist in order to feel calmer and more confident. You need to read books, watch films, expand your horizons. This will help you carry on any conversation.
Depression
I don’t want to communicate with anyone... To figure out what the cause of this condition is, you can ask a psychologist for help or try to figure out the situation on your own. To do this, you need to answer a number of questions related to depression and consider its symptoms.
