Self-knowledge: stages, essence and the very goal for a person

Self-knowledge in a person’s life begins almost from birth. This process is quite complex in its structure. It is present in every age period of a person, but the degree of its severity varies. Self-knowledge most often intensifies during adolescence and youth. But in old age it declines, but there are exceptions.

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Results of self-knowledge and the process of self-knowledge

In the course of self-knowledge, a person gets to know himself. This knowledge can be divided into groups. For example, emotions, character traits, behavioral characteristics, intellectual properties. They are also called constructs. They form a self-image, on the basis of which the self-concept is formed.

If we highlight the general results of self-knowledge, then this is a sense of personal competence. What does it consist of? The first is the feeling that we are all similar, i.e. identical. And the second is that we accept ourselves entirely and completely, with pros and cons, positive and negative qualities. A person does not resist himself, while he has a desire to grow, develop and change something in himself, but this happens gradually.

As feelings of identity and self-acceptance emerge, self-esteem emerges. This feeling expresses the degree of sympathy a person has for himself.

And, identity, self-esteem and self-acceptance contribute to a sense of self-competence. How does it manifest itself? In the fact that a person accepts himself, his characteristics, he can make important decisions himself and determine his destiny.

Self-knowledge

Yu.M. Zenko

  • Difficulties of self-knowledge
  • Remedies for difficulties in self-knowledge

The Apostle Paul urged: “Pay attention to yourself and to the teaching; do this constantly: for by doing this you will save both yourself and those who listen to you” (1 Tim. 4:16). This delving into oneself, self-knowledge is developed gradually, it does not exist in people in a ready-made form:

  • “Man does not know himself. To know yourself, you need a great habit of distracting yourself from feelings, concentrating the soul and keeping it within itself” / Christian: Augustine. About order. 1992, p.115/; “No matter how extensive a circle is, there is one middle point in it, towards which everything inclines, called by geometers the center, and although the parts of its circumference can be infinitely divisible, there is no other point in the circle from which all the others are at an equal distance and which would dominate over all... Go out from here into any part of the circle, and you will lose everything by which the multitude is held in unity. So the soul, having poured out of itself, is scattered in a certain infinity and exhausted to the point of complete poverty, since its nature forces it to seek one thing in everything, and multitude prevents it from finding it” / ibid., p. 116/;
  • “we are far from ourselves, and we have little desire to get closer to ourselves, but we keep running away so as not to meet ourselves and exchange the truth for trinkets and even think: I would be glad to do spiritual work or prayer, but there is no time, troubles and worries about life they don’t give time for this activity” / Christian: Candid stories. 1991, p.93/.

Meanwhile, the relevance of self-knowledge for every person and all of humanity can hardly be overestimated: “This is not a luxury... it is an urgent necessity of life. Because if a person today does not know himself, then perhaps this century or the coming century will be the last in the millennia-long history of people” / Ch. 1: Men. 1993, p.83/.

Such a great importance of self-knowledge and knowledge in general presupposes the presence of the right approach to them: on the one hand, it is necessary to pay due attention to them, on the other hand, there should not be an obsession with them. The latter, for example, happened in Gnosticism, which exaggerated the role of knowledge (“gnosis”). In addition, incorrect cognition is also possible. For example, knowledge without thanking God or knowledge without love.

The first was characteristic of the pagans, about whom St. Paul wrote: “But because they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God and were not grateful, but became futile in their speculations, and their foolish hearts were darkened; calling themselves wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man, and birds, and four-footed creatures, and creeping things - then God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to uncleanness, so that they defiled their very bodies. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature instead of the Creator...” (Rom. 1:21-25).

Knowledge without love is assessed no less negatively from a Christian point of view: “If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries, and have all knowledge and all faith, so that I can move mountains, but do not have love, then I am nothing” ( 1 Corinthians 13:2).

Self-knowledge is often talked about in non-Christian religious traditions: ancient Greek religion, Taoism, Buddhism, Islam. "Know yourself!" – read the famous ancient Greek inscription. “Whoever knows his soul knows his Lord,” says the Sufi tradition /add.: Zhukovsky. 1895, p.20/. But, of course, there are sufficient differences between different religious movements in the approach to self-knowledge.

This especially applies to Eastern religions, which are based on the concept of the emptiness of the self. According to this view, there is no self, no human soul, no personality. It is clear that self-knowledge in this form, as knowledge of the illusory nature of one’s “I,” is diametrically opposed to Christian self-knowledge, as knowledge of one’s substantial and immortal soul.

In addition, we must keep in mind that the concept of self-knowledge is often used in a variety of different contexts. This, for example, happens in analytical or depth psychology, founded by Carl Jung. Here is a quote that praises his contribution to the cause of self-knowledge: “When considering Jung’s contribution to the development of our culture, one merit, it seems to me, becomes obvious to me. Jung gave a clear answer to the most pressing psychological need in our culture for self-knowledge, which exists from Oedipus to Socrates, Hamlet and Faust. Jung not only took the maxim “know thyself” as the leitmotif of his life, but also gave a method by which each of us can answer the basic question of self-knowledge. It is in Jung that we can find the answer to the question that is the main stimulus of any psychology in general - how to know yourself...” /add.: Hillman. 1997, p.65/. But in fact, everything is quite the opposite, and this is a fundamental point: self-knowledge is not an epistemological, but an ontological problem. Psychological self-examination without purification and without the gracious help of God is not true self-knowledge, or even self-knowledge in general. Psychological methods of analysis are not enough to illuminate the depths of the human soul in which negative spiritual entities reside. As a result of this, such “self-knowledge” turns into self-deception and indulgence in one’s sins and weaknesses, and, ultimately, into communication with demons. This is clearly demonstrated by the example of Jung himself.

Some of this is no secret to Jung's followers. Hillman himself writes a few pages later: “there are multiple answers to all the basic archetypal questions depending on the god and the mythological system that determines our answer, dispassionate and Apollonian, abstract and Saturnian, in the form of Dionysian discharge or divine love, heroic deeds or Hephaestus artifacts . Apparently, there is no single way of self-knowledge...” /add.: Hillman. 1997, p.70/. It is not surprising that in his long enumeration Hillman forgot Christianity, only hinting at it with a phrase about divine love - between “Dionysian détente” and “heroic deeds.” Ultimately, he “puts religious introspection apart” /ibid., p.71/ and in fact does not consider it at all.

Let us now dwell on the Orthodox Christian tradition of self-knowledge. The first and most important duty of a person in Christianity is the duty to love God, to know Him correctly and to honor Him worthily / Christian: Solyarsky. 1892, p.88/. Duties to oneself and to one’s neighbors are inextricably linked with duties to God. And just as in the duties of a Christian to God, the first place is occupied by the knowledge of God, so in the duties to oneself, the first place is occupied by self-knowledge, without which no other duties to oneself can be properly fulfilled / ibid. p.190/.

Therefore, self-knowledge is certainly very important, as many Christian authors have written and are writing about:

  • “The most beautiful and most important of all sciences is undoubtedly self-knowledge. Because he who knows himself will come to know God” / Christian: Clement of Alexandria. Teacher. 1996, p.213/;
  • “Why do you measure water by a handful, the sky by a span, and all the earth by a handful (Ps. 40:12) - do you measure the great elements, measured for the Creator alone? First of all, know yourself, consider what is in your hands, who you are” / Christian: Gregory the Theologian. T. 1. 1994, p. 477/;
  • ““Be attentive to yourself” so that you can distinguish between what is harmful and what is salutary” / Basil the Great. In words... 1911, p.92/; ““Pay attention to yourself,” that is, pay attention not to what is yours and around you, but to yourself alone; for we ourselves are different; the other is what belongs to us, and the other is what is around us” /ibid., p.93/. Why “search into yourself with all possible care”? To give to each part of the human being what is necessary: ​​“for the flesh - food and coverings, and for the soul - the dogmas of piety, decent behavior, exercise in virtue, correction of passions...” / ibid., p.93/;
  • “All the saints were distinguished by strict, accurate and correct psychological analysis (analysis, knowledge): apostles, saints, martyrs, saints, unmercenaries, holy fools for Christ’s sake, pillars...” / John of Kronstadt. 1997, p.51/;
  • “Without self-knowledge, true moral activity in relation to oneself, other people and God is impossible...” / Nikanor (Kamensky). 1898, p.3/.

Self-knowledge of a Christian consists in correct knowledge of our human nature, its various dispositions, powers and properties and their various developments and states in general, in knowledge of all this in oneself in particular. Such self-knowledge is an important and necessary duty of every Christian. As the famous Christian ascetic of the 6th century Abba Isaiah writes: “Know yourself, and run away from what is destructive for you” / Christian: Isaiah Abba. 1883, p.51/.

Many other Christian ascetics and modern theologians also agree with this:

  • “Self-knowledge is the correct concept of one’s spiritual age...” / Christian: John Climacus. 2001, p.175/; “he who knows himself is never scolded to undertake a task beyond his strength” / ibid., p. 177/;
  • “That is why we are gifted with intelligence, so that we know what we should do; and the admonition “Know thyself” in this case means nothing more than the following: “Know for what end you were all created.” We were created and placed in this world in order to be faithful fulfillers of the commandments, if we want to inherit salvation” / Christian: Clement of Alexandria. 1892, p.20/;
  • “Let us continually examine ourselves, in relation to all passions and virtues, in order to find out where we are: whether at the beginning, in the middle, or at the end” /Christ.: John Climacus. 2001, p.193/;
  • “Find out what is hidden in your heart. Look there often, and you will see that in him there is pride, arrogance, pride, love of money, anger, envy, love of glory, uncleanliness, desire for revenge, and all kinds of sinful abomination” / Christian: Tikhon of Zadonsk. T. 11. 1837, p. 160/;
  • “self-knowledge is necessary; it is knowledge of oneself and especially the limitations of one’s abilities, one’s shortcomings and lack of art” / Christian: Nazarius. 1885, p.72/;
  • “The first step is to know yourself. Sin is division within ourselves and division in relation to others... / Christian: Metropolitan Anthony. Surozhsky. 1997, p.7/.

Sober self-knowledge leads a person to very sad conclusions: “Carefully turning my gaze to myself and observing the course of my inner state, I became experimentally convinced that I do not love God, have no love for my neighbor, do not believe in anything religious and am filled with pride and voluptuousness.” /christ.: Frank stories... 1991 p.24/.

Self-knowledge is connected with conscience: “examine yourself, not in the exaltation of false knowledge of external wisdom and not under the accumulation of vain thoughts, with fear and trembling” / Christian: Simeon the New Theologian. T. 1. 1993, p. 409/; “If you want to know what your life is like and what your condition is, ask your soul and tell it: soul, have you fulfilled all the commandments of God or not? And she, having opened the mouth of her conscience, will certainly tell you the real truth” /ibid., p.409/.

True self-knowledge is impossible without humility:

  • “Of course, we do not think that a person is able to know himself through the methods of discrimination, inference and dissection, unless through difficult repentance and intense struggle he first expels pride and guile from his own mind. Because whoever does not lead his mind in this way and to such a structure will not even see his ignorance, but only with this does successful self-knowledge begin” / Christian: Gregory Palamas. 1995, p.73/;
  • “Everyone who knew himself, rested from all his work... and entered the sanctuary of God, into the mental worship of the Spirit and into the divine refuge of dispassion and humility” / Nikita Stifat. 1900, p.122/. “Know yourself; and this is truly true humility, teaching one to be humble and contrite the heart...” / ibid., pp. 121–122/. “When someone comes to know himself, and this requires a lot of outside guarding, abstinence from worldly affairs and a strict examination of conscience, then immediately and suddenly a divine kind of humility comes into the soul, something more than a word, bringing contrition to the heart and tears of warm tenderness: so that then the one experiencing it action within itself considers itself earth and ashes...” /ibid., p.122/.

From self-knowledge comes the prayer: “Only the one who has seen his Soul with his inner eyes and knows its dignity, only he, with the help of God’s Power, sees and knows his terrible fall. And what a mysterious vision this is - to see your disembodied soul, God's Intelligent Beauty, and see it in the mantle of passions, to see it in the stinking rags of lust and sin. This vision can be amazing, indescribable, divine. This vision gives birth to an unceasing cry: “Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me!” / Christian: Zhuravsky John. 1996, pp.75–76/.

True self-knowledge leads to humility, kindness and mercy, for whoever knows the full depth of his sins will not be exalted above others. This destroys the reason for such an important sin as judging others. Therefore, “everyone should take care of his own mental illnesses, and everyone should mourn his sins, not despising his neighbor” / Christian: Isaiah Abba. 1883, p.62/; “Therefore, Christians themselves must use every effort, but not condemn anyone at all, neither an obvious harlot, nor sinners, or disorderly people, but look at everyone with simple-minded will, a pure eye, so that a person turns into something natural and indispensable - no one not to humiliate, not to condemn, not to disdain anyone and not to make distinctions between people... For this is the purity of the heart, so that, seeing sinners or the weak, have compassion for them and be merciful” / Christian: Macarius of Egypt. 1998, p.113/.

This is an important difference between Christian self-knowledge and pagan self-knowledge. St. Gregory Palamas writes: “I will reveal to you the monstrous depth of the deceit of external philosophers. The evil one and those who learned from him to philosophize craftily have stolen one of our most useful commandments and present it as some kind of crafty bait thanks to the similarity of the expressions “Listen to yourself” and “Know yourself” / Christian: Gregory Palamas. 1995, p.18/. This refers to the comparison and contrast of the ancient Greek principle of “knowing yourself” and the expression “take heed to yourself” (Deut. 15:9), often used in the patristic tradition, as it sounds in the translation of the 70 and in the Slavic translation (Synodal Russian translation of this place sounds like this: “Beware lest a lawless thought enter your heart”).

According to Gregory Palamas, pagan authors used the call to self-knowledge as a bait: “But if you figure out what the meaning of this commandment is for them, you will discover the abyss of evil teaching: professing the transmigration of souls, they believe that a person will achieve self-knowledge and fulfill this commandment if he knows what body was associated with before, where he lived, what he did and what he studied; he will find out this, obediently surrendering to the insidious whisperings of the evil spirit” / ibid., pp. 18–19/.

Self-knowledge is also necessary in the matter of knowledge of God and worship of God. He who does not know himself cannot correctly know God and, therefore, cannot fulfill his duties to Him:

  • “Whoever knows himself knows God. He who knows God renders him proper worship.” /Christian: Anthony the Great. 1826, p.165/;
  • “Do you want to know God? Know thyself first” /Christ.: Nile, teacher. 1827, p.171/.
  • “Accurate observance of yourself will give you sufficient guidance to the knowledge of God. For if you “pay attention to yourself,” you will not have the need to look for traces of the Creator in the structure of the universe, but in yourself, as if in some small world, you will see the great wisdom of your Creator” / Basil the Great. In words... 1911, p.98/;
  • “But, oh, my brothers and fathers! I beg you, may each of us strive to first know ourselves, so that later we will have the opportunity, sometimes from what is within our limits, to know what is above us. For whoever did not first know himself so that he could say with David: I am a worm and not a man (Ps. 21:7), and with Abraham: I am earth and ashes (Gen. 18:27), he will not can cognize anything of the spiritual and divine spiritually and worthily, and as befits the supernatural and wise Spirit” / Christian: Simeon the New Theologian. T. 2. 1993, pp. 342–343/;
  • “Through this knowledge of himself and nature, a person must know God...” / Mikhail (Desnitsky). 1819, p.4/;
  • “Before anyone desires to know God, he must know himself: for it is not possible to know the Highest Being unless we recognize our own humiliation” / Christian: Kandorsky. 1798, p.10/.

It is from within, through his soul, that a person comes to God: “How the bodily senses, since the body is mortal, see the mortal; Thus, the soul, contemplating the immortal and thinking about the immortal, must itself be immortal and live forever. For the concepts and contemplations of immortality will never leave her, remaining in her and serving, as it were, as an incentive to maintain immortality. Therefore, the soul has the concept of contemplating God, and it becomes a path for itself, not borrowing from outside, but drawing within itself knowledge and understanding of God the Word” / Christian: Athanasius the Great. T. 1. 1994, p. 170/.

True self-knowledge is not just some kind of abstract self-deepening, but the knowledge of Christ in oneself: “The Son of God came down and received a soul, not so that the soul might know itself in Christ, but so that it might know Christ in itself. For the danger threatens her not from ignorance of herself, but from ignorance of the Word of God: In Him, says [the apostle], life was revealed to you (1 John 1:2), and not the soul, and so on. “I came,” He says, “to save a soul (Luke 9:56),” but He did not say “show”” / Christian: Tertullian. 1994, p.175/.

True self-knowledge is so important that it is necessary for the correct knowledge of others and the correct love and respect for them. He who does not know himself will never learn to know and understand them correctly, treat them properly, love and respect them. Self-love, pride and other similar vices that remove a person from God and his neighbors are always based on an incorrect concept of oneself, or ignorance of oneself (Luke 18:11; Rev. 3:17). On the other hand, knowledge of oneself can occur not only through self-research and self-contemplation, but also through self-disclosure in deeds and actions, that is, in relation to other people /add.: Kulikov. Psychology of mood. 1997, p.184/.

The main forms of self-knowledge are realized through introversion, turning to one’s inner world. This is not so easy to do: “we spend our entire lives, from childhood to old age, for the most part outside ourselves, chasing after material benefits, now after external splendor, now after acquisitions in the field of sciences and arts, now even after the most empty and fruitless pleasures; but we don’t want to go home and see what we have and what we don’t have, what is being done and what is not being done, what is required in internal life for external life, and how to acquire these conditions” / Karpov. 1860, pp. 18–19/. Usually a person knows not himself, but his own, which he takes for himself /ibid., p.20/

St. John of Kronstadt urged: “Look more carefully, deeper into your inner, mental or spiritual world, full of the greatest mental and moral interest, and do not get carried away by the external, material, transitory and disappearing world... In that inner world you have much, much to do and efforts due to the perversion of our spiritual order or the laws of creative and mental and physical corruption” / John of Kronstadt. 1991, p.57/.

From external asceticism - to internal thought of God, from silence of the lips - to silence of the mind, from solitude - to unity with God, from external activity for the good of humanity - to internal enlightened love for people: this is the path of the Christian ascetic / Christian: Hilarion (Alfeev) . 1998, p.95/.

Christian saints teach Christians self-knowledge by their example. Self-knowledge was primarily the task of holy hermits and desert dwellers. Having retired from the world, they monitored their every thought, every movement of their soul, they were able to distinguish the most subtle shades of their thoughts, in the desires and movements of the heart; Through this they themselves achieved high spiritual perfection, and were able to lead others to this perfection. As Bishop writes. Ignatius (Brianchaninov): “The holy monks, having achieved, in the light of Divine grace, a self-view to which self-delusion can no longer give the incorrectness and darkness that it imparted to philosophers, led by the spirit of this age, the spirit of lies and delusion, became the only true psychologists” /Christ. : Ignatius (Brianchaninov). T. 3. 1993, p. 295/.

From the depths of his spiritual experience, St. fathers advise:

  • “Pay attention to yourself and recognize the actions that took place in you from humility and crying, and notice what benefit they bring you every hour” / Christian: Simeon the New Theologian. Creations. T. 2, p.525/;
  • “Be always attentive to yourself... Constantly enter into yourself and see: which passions, according to your observation, have become exhausted before you, which of them have disappeared and completely retreated from you, and which of them have begun to fall silent due to your spiritual health, and not as a result of removing what troubled you, and which ones have you learned to overcome with your mind, and not by depriving yourself of what serves as a reason for them? Pay attention also to whether you really see that in the midst of the festering of your ulcer, living flesh, that is, the spiritual world, began to grow. Which passions are gradually and which are promptly compelled, and at what intervals?” /christ: Isaac the Syrian. 1993, pp. 189–190/.

Self-knowledge in our time is important not only at the individual, but also at the national and even global human level. God's providence extends to individual people, to all humanity, and to individual “kingdoms and nations” /Christ.: Macarius (Bulgakov). T. 1. 1999, p.582/. Therefore, everything that we said about self-knowledge in relation to an individual applies to the entire people, who must, through self-knowledge, carefully study the ways of God’s providence in relation to him /additional: Krasin. 1917, p.848/. Self-knowledge of the people is a reliable way to prevent nationalism and national selfishness, for a people who have recognized their weaknesses will not highlight their merits and exalt themselves above other peoples.

The process of self-discovery

The process of self-knowledge is a complete awareness of oneself, character, and essence. By the way, it is self-knowledge that distinguishes a person from other inhabitants of our planet, for example, animals. In all beliefs and religious movements, self-knowledge is defined as a means of recognizing and understanding one’s community with God. This is especially evident in Eastern religions.

It is quite simple and clear that a person determines his life path. Chooses between several options, sets a goal, performs actions, interacts with others. Thanks to this, he begins to be an interesting person, both to those around him, and he begins to enjoy spending time with himself.

Ways of self-knowledge

  • Self-observation is considered the beginning of the entire process of self-knowledge. During it, a person observes himself. Using this method, a person increases his awareness. Here you must focus on what is happening inside you, on what feelings you are experiencing.
  • Introspection. When you analyze yourself, you look at your behavior and reactions. You are trying to understand why you did what you did and nothing else. Psychologically, self-analysis is considered the most difficult.
  • Comparison. Here a person, willy-nilly, compares himself with others. This is their nature. As a result of comparisons, a person gets to know himself better.
  • Self-acceptance. Here a person accepts himself completely and without reserve. He is aware of his strengths and weaknesses and is ready to improve himself.

What methods of self-knowledge exist and how to apply them

Self-discovery is a lifelong process. Therefore, it is important to learn to enjoy it yourself. And having realized who you are and where you are going, you need to continue to rethink and improve your knowledge about yourself and the world. In this article we will look at several methods of self-knowledge, describe their advantages and show how to apply them.

Self-knowledge is the study by an individual of his mental and physical characteristics, comprehension of himself. It is formed gradually as we learn about the world around us and our own personality. This is a very slow, but at the same time exciting process. At some stage, a person may realize that he was mistaken about himself and rethink, clarify his values ​​and goals. This is also part of the job and should be treated with understanding.

Why do you need to know yourself at all?

The short answer is that self-knowledge will allow a person to find happiness and peace of mind. It’s sad when a person spends several decades doing something, and then realizes that he wasted his time and that he was actually interested in completely different things. But if these regrets are not uttered on your deathbed, then there is time to make things right.

If you answer in more detail, this gives the ability for self-improvement, personal growth and self-actualization. A person who is at arm's length from understanding himself feels the fullness of life and realizes its meaning. We talk about arm's length because, as stated in the first paragraph, this process lasts a lifetime. And there is no problem with that. We can be in an eternal search and at the same time feel the world as it is, enjoy every moment of our life.

Well, in the end, when you understand who you really are, there are no deep and painful conflicts within you. Household problems will arise every day, but you will cope with them because you have resolved the main ones. You will take actions only because you clearly know that they fully fit into your system of values ​​and self-understanding. You will not take meaningless actions and be in unconscious states when a variety of situations lead you, and you do not manage your life yourself.

The prospect is tempting, and every person understands that he needs to strive for this. He feels he needs it. Let's look at effective ways of self-knowledge and learn how to use them.

Ways of self-knowledge

Before we begin to analyze the tools, it is worth saying that by using them, you can learn not the most pleasant things about yourself. Therefore, be prepared in advance to evaluate yourself objectively. If it helps, imagine that you are evaluating a complete stranger to eliminate increased emotionality and self-flagellation.

1

Introspection

This is the first step on the path to self-knowledge. As has already been said, you must evaluate yourself completely objectively. You observe yourself, your behavior and your reactions to external stimuli. Self-observation involves constantly increasing your level of awareness.

There are several ways. For example, you could hang sticky notes above your desk (or wherever you spend the most time) with questions like these:

  • What am I doing now and why?
  • What am I thinking about now?
  • How do I feel now? What can you call this feeling or sensation?
  • What makes me feel alive and real?
  • When do I act hypocritically?

You should focus on five points: feelings, sensations, thoughts, images and actions. Remember that you should not judge yourself, you are only getting to know yourself. You need to see the real picture, not the one you want. If you often feel insecure, admit it. Remember that this prevents you from achieving understanding of yourself and your goals.

You can write down everything you are doing now or have done today. If possible, you should keep such records at least once every 2-3 hours. After some time, you will realize that you are monitoring your emotions and actions and are no longer reacting on autopilot. This is a sign that the first step has been completed successfully. However, it is worth returning to again and again, as over time you will change or gain a deeper understanding of your motives and values.

2

Introspection

You are now ready to analyze your observations. With this method, you begin to reflect more on your behavior and reactions. You see the consequences of actions and try to determine their causes. This stage is very important and psychologically difficult. You may realize that more than half of your reactions come from childhood and also from your subconscious.

And you have a serious choice - to do it yourself or turn to a specialist. If you feel like you can handle it yourself, start taking notes.

Focus on the negative emotions and thoughts that arise day after day. This may include resentment, a desire to criticize others and people’s rejection of this, increased irritability, anger and apathy. If you, for example, dealt with your grievances, this will greatly change both your understanding of yourself and your life. Surely there were periods when you were not offended by anyone and you were in a great mood, and on other days it was the other way around. Want to know why? You will realize how much better you will feel and understand yourself if you learn not to be offended by the words and actions of other people.

Most of us simply do not have sufficient experience and knowledge to correctly assess our personality. Therefore, we recommend that you read more books on this topic. In addition to giving you a framework for assessing your personality, they often contain a list of questions whose answers will help you get to know yourself better.

3

Comparison

People love comparisons by nature. Both comparing oneself with others and categories (“best” - “worst”). But this can either hinder you from getting to know you or help you.

Comparing yourself to other people is not an unambiguous evil. If this leaves you feeling frustrated, worthless and jealous, then yes, you need to change your ways. If comparison with other people inspires you and forces you to become even better, then you are doing everything right. As has been said, self-knowledge helps you determine who you really are. However, this does not mean that you do not need to develop and become better. The biography of a successful person will help you understand and perhaps even identify hidden talents and resources in yourself that you were not aware of.

Comparing categories is likely to lead to bad consequences. By calling one person lazy and another hardworking, you impair communication and criticism, which can result in internal conflicts. After all, by such standards, you are lazy if you wake up in the morning and don’t want to get to work. This leads to unnecessary stress and the development of complexes.

So we can give you two pieces of advice. First: comparing yourself to other people is good if you do it in the right way and are inspired by other people's actions. Second: since comparison by categories is sometimes unavoidable, use all points of view, or at least do not judge yourself or other people. If your friend cannot get down to work, this does not mean that he is lazy. Just like in your case.

4

Self-acceptance

At this stage, you accept yourself for who you are. This does not mean that you should be content with this, because self-development is necessary for any person. But now you know what to start from. You understand what your weaknesses and strengths, aspirations and motivations, values ​​and goals are. It's also important to look for strengths in your weaknesses because it makes them less painful to perceive.

At this stage, you cannot do without self-testing, because you can be wrong about yourself, and besides, you are constantly changing. Therefore, you should not be satisfied with the picture that you have. Develop, change, but constantly watch yourself and try to understand yourself and the changes that are happening inside you.

In conclusion, I would like to advise you to study psychology, in particular such sections as social psychology and personality psychology.

For a more detailed understanding of the topic, take a course on self-knowledge, which will help you analyze more than 50 characteristics of your personality and learn how to apply this knowledge in life.

We wish you good luck!

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  • How to get to know yourself better?
  • Exercises for self-knowledge

Key words:1Self-knowledge

Types of self-knowledge

There are several types of self-knowledge. Among them:

  • Analytical – has a connection with the activities of our mind;
  • Creative – connected with our feelings;
  • Spiritual – associated with our religion, faith.

There are also indirect self-knowledge (when a person analyzes his own behavior) and direct self-knowledge (self-observation).

Analytical self-knowledge

Analytical self-knowledge occurs as a result of knowing oneself and observing oneself. A written analysis during self-observation helps to get to know yourself better. For example, keeping personal diaries. Another way is self-confession. In this case, you need to tell yourself about yourself. Sometimes this can be quite difficult, because defense mechanisms come into play. A psychologist can help here. But reflection is different from confession, because you will simply observe the process, without any assessment of yourself.

Human creative self-knowledge

Such self-knowledge allows you to get to know yourself better through games, going to the theater, general activities and social events. For example, playing in the theater. It has a positive effect on the psyche because internal resistance disappears. After all, this is a game, and the person there is an actor. This is where deep self-knowledge occurs.

Spiritual self-discovery

In this type of self-knowledge, a person chooses a certain method of spiritual self-knowledge. This could be yoga or spiritual practices. And using this method he begins to get to know himself, to analyze his own actions.

Self-knowledge

The process of knowing yourself is called self-knowledge. It is formed throughout life, transforming depending on circumstances. A person’s self-knowledge is influenced by various factors, such as a person’s social status, his social roles, character and temperament, creative and physical abilities, and much more.

Personality formation occurs throughout life. A person is born, begins to explore the outside world and comes to realize himself as a separate person. In infancy, the child becomes aware of and accepts himself through his mother. Subsequently, he begins to understand that he is a separate person from her, begins to learn to accept and study himself, his body, behavior, and the reaction of others to him.

Psychologists argue that the influence of various factors on the process of self-knowledge is irreversible. Therefore, the more positive examples a child sees in childhood, the more thorough the process of self-knowledge will take place in his life.

Psychological dependence on various circumstances may also be associated with some difficulties in childhood.

With the process of personality formation, a person begins to understand what surrounds him, what reality he is in, how society influences him and how he himself influences social processes.

Stages of self-knowledge

A person gets to know himself throughout his life. At each age stage, corresponding stages of self-knowledge occur.

  1. Self-recognition

Self-recognition is the initial stage of knowing yourself. It begins almost from the moment of birth. The child understands that he lives as a separate person. Look in the mirror, he recognizes himself.

  1. Self-concept

Self-concept is a person’s very stable understanding of himself and his characteristics. This concept is formed in the process of various life events.

  1. Self-esteem

Self-esteem determines how significant a person is to himself, how important his activities are, recognizing all the pros and cons. Here, the achievements of the person himself and his assessment by the people around him occupy a significant position.

Values ​​in self-knowledge through yoga practice

Thanks to yoga and various spiritual practices, people can understand their inner world and become more aware of themselves. In yoga there are several steps that you need to go through. Thus, a whole list is formed, thanks to which a person has his values ​​in order; a special place there is occupied by spiritual values, to which he strives throughout his life.

Need for self-knowledge

People often ask questions about the meaning of life and true values. How can a person understand himself and those around him? Such questions are the basis for the need for oneself. This need is inherent in every person. People are in an eternal search for the meaning of life; it comes first for them. After all, until we understand the meaning of life, we will not learn to understand ourselves.

Inner peace and self-knowledge

Where is the meaning of life? It is logical that it is inside us, not outside. When we understand this, our lives begin to change. From here appear monks who sell their Mercedes and say goodbye to their past life. It's not that simple here. Such people choose the path of spirituality, not because they feel like it right now, but in a week they will return back to their normal life. Here we are talking about the fact that they follow the path of spirituality throughout their lives.

Personal growth as a stage of self-knowledge

As a person develops, his or her level of self-knowledge increases. For example, at the beginning the child learns to distinguish himself from other people. Further, as he grows up, he develops beliefs about himself. And then he finds motivation that encourages him to improve his life and develop.

The path of self-discovery

The path of self-knowledge is so close, and at the same time its horizons are boundless, that a person sometimes does not know where to begin his journey on the path to himself. But you just need to start, awaken the desire for self-recognition, internal growth of yourself as a person, and at the same time a passion for self-improvement will appear. They are like twins: they are similar to each other, the development of one implies the inclusion of the other in the work. Self-knowledge cannot live without self-improvement.

Self-improvement - the desire to achieve the Absolute, getting closer to the ideal

The process of self-improvement is immanent in human nature to the same extent as self-knowledge. The pursuit of ideality is what we live for. Perhaps this is said loudly, and yet every person has a thirst for self-realization, we cannot underestimate this. Due to the desire to realize oneself through various aspects of life, a person constantly strives to improve his knowledge and skills. On this road, he also reconsiders his goals, which are based on values.

Changing value categories leads to transformation of the personality itself. Often the process of transition, finding oneself, is accompanied by changes in a person’s external life: his environment, friends, place of residence, and occupation change. One thing remains unchanged - the desire for self-improvement through self-knowledge.

Methods of self-knowledge

Self-knowledge occurs at the moment when a person begins to realize that he is different from others. What methods does the person use?

  • Personality modeling. This method detects emotions. Positive and negative emotions and feelings towards people that contribute to successful cooperation or provoke conflicts. This method allows you to assess your position in the world around you.
  • Method of unity of antipodes. Thanks to this method, a person understands that he has a positive attitude towards someone and a negative attitude towards someone. You definitely notice that you behave differently with different people.

Primary self-knowledge

The process of self-discovery begins in infancy. Throughout life, it changes and takes on more and more defined forms. Primary self-knowledge begins to develop in early childhood. Trust in the world and in oneself depends on it.

The very first stage in self-knowledge is primary. The child forms an idea of ​​himself and other people, begins to explore the world, gets acquainted with the reactions of people and with his own. The process of self-knowledge is embedded in the brain. From birth, a person begins to learn to accept himself as he is.

Thanks to properly organized help from parents, the process of primary self-knowledge will be easier. Due to the great influence of parents on their child, part of his ideas about himself and the world around him will be inextricably linked with the parents’ idea of ​​him. As a result of praise or, conversely, conflicts emerging in the family, the child begins to know himself and learns to accept the world.

Despite the fact that primary self-knowledge begins at an early age, the crisis of this stage occurs in more mature years. When encountering any obstacles along the way, a discrepancy with one’s expectations, the changed world begins to seem different from what it was in early childhood. Teenagers often tend to idealize the surrounding reality, however, at some point a crisis occurs. This is called a crisis of primary self-knowledge, when one’s own ideas began to undergo some changes that must be come to terms with.

Means of self-knowledge

Knowing the methods of self-knowledge, a person begins to use means of self-knowledge that help him develop his spiritual world. Such tools help you better begin to understand yourself.

  1. The first means is self-report. You can start a personal diary or blog where you can analyze the changes taking place in your life.
  2. Cinema, books, theater. It is necessary to read, go to shows, developing spirituality.
  3. Attending social and psychological events. Trainings help you to know yourself better.
  4. Don't be afraid to consult a psychologist. This is not a doctor, he will simply help you understand yourself better.

Self-knowledge and self-esteem

Self-esteem is one of the components of self-knowledge. A person evaluates himself and builds his own value system. Self-esteem can be normal (adequate), underestimated or overestimated.

It's no secret that arrogant people are too self-confident and have low self-criticism. Low self-esteem causes timidity, making a person withdrawn and shy. And adequate self-esteem allows a person to be confident in himself and evaluate his capabilities and strengths without distortion.

Self-concept theory as a stage of self-knowledge

When a person has formed an idea of ​​himself, it is called self-concept. It includes: the personal “I” and the social “I”. The first shows how a person sees himself. And the second is how other people understand it.

This theory is based on two aspects: the desire to come into harmony with oneself and the opportunity to raise one’s self-esteem.

Self-concept has 2 vectors:

  • objective is how we perceive ourselves in our lives;
  • aspirational is a desired image of how we want to be perceived.

A person will always strive for the desired image in his life. This image can be based on a person in the past and at the present moment. Now the person has achieved significant results. Over time, the distance between the desired and the actual will shrink until it disappears.

Self-discovery exercises

These exercises allow you to better understand yourself. Thanks to them, a person improves himself.

For example, you can perform the exercise “4 squares of the psychology of consciousness.” You need to divide a sheet of paper into 4 squares. In the first you need to write your positive traits and qualities, in the third you need to write what you think are negative qualities. Then you need to write in the adjacent squares the antipodes of these qualities, completely opposite. You need to be as honest with yourself as possible and understand that there are no absolutely ideal people and personality traits. You should improve yourself and focus on the positives while working on the negatives.

Books for self-knowledge

In conclusion, we invite you to get acquainted with a selection of books about self-knowledge. They will help those who are already engaged in the study of self-knowledge, as well as those who are just starting.

  1. Colin Tipping "Radical Forgiveness";
  2. Jen Sincero "NOT SY";
  3. Eric Berne "Games People Play" People who play games";
  4. John Gray "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus";
  5. Viktor Frankl “Say Yes to Life!”;
  6. Kate Peterson “Live and Learn”;
  7. Richard Bach "Illusions".
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