How NOT to THINK about a MAN

Ivan Vdovin

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Most likely, having visited this page, you feel very bad at heart and are looking for a solution to your problem, how to stop thinking about a man who doesn’t need you and what to do in such a situation, right? Most likely, you have already exhausted your nerves and want to find peace by letting go of all emotions in your soul.

Let's figure out why you even think about a man? Most likely, you like him, but there is no answer from his side. This means unrequited love or sympathy. But why did you decide that this particular man should be with you? What's good about it? Or maybe it’s for the best that fate doesn’t bring you down?

And you yourself want to stop suffering, many people want to be in such a state themselves, so that they would feel sorry for them, see how they suffer and inflict even more emotions on themselves. If the answer is YES, then of course read on, if you want to continue to suffer, then close the page.

The more you think, the less you think

A paradoxical way to get rid of thoughts is to force yourself to think about a man more and more, just screw yourself up with thoughts so that images only about him come out of all the cracks. You need to get over it, get enough of it.

This is the example of my sister, who as a child loved strawberries very much, and at the age of 15 she ate a lot of them, to the point of nausea. Since then she has been indifferent to strawberries. Here the meaning is the same, we just need to let our psyche get over it, experience it, and re-realize all the thought processes aimed at a man.

But don’t think badly of a man; there is no need to attribute something that is not in him. The goal should simply be thought stronger and more consciously, and not overshadowed by bad thoughts about it. This way you will harm yourself even more, but we love ourselves, so let’s treat ourselves the same way.

Psychologists would NOT want you to know these secrets about yourself

—Imagine this situation...
What if, instead of paying for years for useless consultations with a psychologist, in 21 days you can work with yourself? Get rid of negative thoughts and states forever. And instead live a calm and happy life? Stop living in stress due to relationships or constant lack of money?

Tell me this is impossible?

I thought so too, until I started working with myself

LIVING HAPPY IS EASY

My name is Ivan, I am 35 years old, and I have been practicing psychology for 15 years. I have studied all the basic methods and techniques through which I help people find happiness. NLP, hypnosis, body-image therapy. I was invited on television as an expert.

And it was... just a nightmare!

I lived in a state of depression for 7 years (constant stress exhausted me). I had a lot of low self-confidence (my self-esteem was below 0). I could not calmly communicate with people, it seemed to me that I was not worthy of them.

The relationship did not work out (because I was very negative, jealous, a doormat). I’m generally silent about decent earnings; I earned 15,000 rubles a month and thought that was the limit. I didn’t want to live... Envy.

The worst thing is, I thought I would have to live like this forever, and I don’t deserve love and happiness.

But it only got worse, negative states fell on me like a snowball. It felt like I was sitting in a deep, black hole from which there was no way out. Hopelessness, despair, pain, resentment.

My life has turned into endless torture. But then a miracle happened...

I FOUND THE KEY... EVERYONE HAS IT...

One day my father came home from work, a little drunk, although he never drank much.

He came into the kitchen..., looked at me with a dissatisfied expression and began to say with anger how worthless I was, how I couldn’t do anything, and in general, how sorry he was that he was my father.

At first I felt severe mental pain (this is very painful to hear from my family). Then I got offended (does that mean I’m not a favorite son?!) And then an insight came to me...

I received that magical kick that I had been waiting for all my life. It changed my thinking, my life and my relationships with my environment.

I had already forgiven my father simply because he told me the truth and I was happy about it!

But then the most interesting thing began...

Literally 5 minutes later I was already sitting at the computer and writing out all the psychological (!) methods of working with myself.

I was even confused, because my plans were to continue to suffer all my life.

It was such an incredible feeling of freedom and desire to do something that I burst into tears of happiness.

THE MAIN SECRET OF HAPPINESS

If you think that you cannot change your life, become rich or successful, or create a happy relationship - you are mistaken!

You can change your life by changing your thinking and the main thing is to do it EASILY!

• 5 simple and powerful methods of working with yourself (they work even if you use them incorrectly) - You don’t have to turn to psychologists, you are your own psychologist.

• “The secret method” of working through any negative state. This will allow you to eliminate the negative and switch to the positive in 5 minutes.

• 15 minutes a day - Just 15 minutes a day to change your life 180 degrees. Become happier and more joyful.

• Saving up to 100,000 rubles in 1 year - You will save on trips to a psychologist, and spend the saved money on a vacation by the sea.

• 21 days – It only takes 21 days for you to see changes in your life. You will start smiling. Wake up with joy.

DOWNLOAD THE “GUIDE TO CHANGING YOURSELF” FOR FREE

For 7 days, access to the “Guide to Changing Yourself” will be free, everyone can download it from Telegram using the button below.

PS If you want to say “thank you” to me, just download the guide and start using it every day.

PPS How about becoming happy today? =)

Most common mistakes

After breaking up with a man, women often make a lot of mistakes. Common options include:

Threats, including suicide. Impressionable guys, out of fear for a girl, can resume a relationship, but such a relationship will not bring happiness.
Gifts should not be required to be returned. A man should not give away what was accepted in a relationship. You shouldn't make a guy feel obligated in this way.
Attempts to exert influence through mutual friends and acquaintances. You should not involve third parties in disputes. Such behavior will cause aggression in a man.
The pursuit. You shouldn’t track down a guy, call, write on social networks and look for meetings. Obsession will push you away even more.
Ladies often turn to black magic and conspiracies. A love spell is a sin that will not bring peace of mind and love. The guy still won't be able to live with a woman.
There is no need to invent a non-existent pregnancy. The man will not marry anyway; his opinion of the girl will worsen after such an act.
You should not agree to maintain friendly relations. The offer to remain friends is often caused by the desire to maintain a “backup airfield.” Some guys feel like they owe it to them out of guilt. Friendship will not help you return your lover, but it will provoke the emergence of love addiction.
You should not try to relieve pain with alcohol, drugs or promiscuity. Such behavior will worsen health, quality of life and worsen already low self-esteem.

Love addiction will not bring happiness. With or without a man by your side, constant addiction deprives you of vitality and destroys your personality. If you lack the strength to cope with the problem on your own, it is better to seek help from a psychologist or psychotherapist. By working together we can destroy destructive feelings.

Main danger

How old are you? Do you want to live longer and younger, full of energy in your body? You need to learn how to quickly change your thinking from negative to positive. Negative thoughts pump all the juices out of us and the stronger the negativity, the faster we become empty. I used to envy people who were not susceptible to negativity, I considered this a genetic feature of a person.

But delving into myself, I realized that negative thoughts are just our life experience, the environment taught us to think this way. Parents, relatives, the media, we absorbed all this since childhood. It’s good that there are tools to clear your negative emotions forever and acquire positive emotional states in their place, which will bring happiness and love into your life.

Exercise

Sit more comfortably or lie down on the bed, the main thing is not to fall asleep, relax all parts of the body in turn, just thinking about them and imagining how they relax from your attention. Relax your head, face, tongue. You should be completely relaxed, like a bag, but your head collected and clear.

Read more: How to start enjoying life?

Start imagining the man you are thinking about, just imagine, let your thoughts themselves lead you wherever they want, they will show everything that is important to know. Just watch what is happening like on TV, don’t make any efforts to direct the process, there’s no point.

Speak deep into yourself - “I take full responsibility for my thoughts, words and actions.” Strengthen your thought process, start thinking harder, eat it like my sister did with strawberries to the point of nausea, as described above. And I repeat once again, the more you think, the less you want.

Repeat this exercise as much as possible, if you are not a lazy person, then 2-3 days will be enough to extinguish the emotions in your heart and find peace and comfort in your soul.

Love or Addiction

Sometimes, enjoying the state of love, women become so focused on their chosen one that they become somewhat emotionally dependent on their feelings for this person.
In psychology, love dependence is called addiction. Doctors do not call for urgent treatment, but they warn that sometimes addiction, which continues for a long time, leads to obsessive states. Often women pay for their long-term love affair with the loss of their own self, health and position in society. Addiction differs from love in the following ways:

Frequent mood swings, directly dependent on contact with a specific person;
A disregard for one's own desires for the sake of satisfying the needs of a partner;
Willingness to endure unpleasant sensations in order for the object of your attention to be constantly nearby;
Erasing interpersonal boundaries, perceiving oneself as one with a partner;
Irritability from comments and advice from loved ones and relatives who call your behavior obsessive;
The desire to meet the requirements of the chosen one, to be worthy of his expectations;
Total control of the thoughts, desires and actions of another person;
A vision of the purpose of life in an effort to make a partner happy by any means;
“Pushing” your interests into the background;
Low self-esteem, a feeling of worthlessness and meaninglessness without a certain man;
A state of constant stress and, as a consequence, the manifestation of somatic diseases;
Clear mental health problems visible to others.

Oddly enough, the predisposition to build such painful relationships begins in childhood. Therefore, in order to promptly understand that a harmful passion threatens to develop into a serious mental state, you need to contact an experienced psychotherapist who will help and teach you how not to constantly think about your lover.

In practical psychology, there is the technique of neurolinguistic programming (NLP). If you feel emotionally dependent on your lover and are seriously concerned about your mental health, try applying NLP to your specific situation. Perhaps this is the technique that will teach you how to forget and not think about your lover.

So, let's begin: choose a secluded place so that no one will distract you, relax and imagine the object of your adoration. Try to mentally examine your man in detail, touch or hug him. Feel how exactly you are connected to him. It can be a strong rope, rope, stretched cord or a thin but strong enough thread. Try to break this connection. This will certainly cause discomfort, pain, and discomfort. You may feel insecure.

Admit what you want to see yourself as. What prevents you from becoming free and confident, independent of your partner? Visualize yourself renewed a little away from yourself, attached to a man. Imagine yourself, able to cope with your problems on your own, successful and bright in appearance. Try new intonations in your voice, project your gait and body movements. Like yourself!

Now turn to your partner, once again feel your visible connection and sharply try to interrupt it. You can mentally use a sharp knife, large tailor's scissors, chop it with an ax or set it on fire. The connection has been broken, but for some reason you feel at ease! Now connect your end of the rope to yourself with a new one, feel how you are filled with new strength and emotions, how pleasant and comfortable it is to feel free and independent!

Why do you need it?

There is an old proven method: take a sheet of paper and write in a column the positive and negative qualities of a man. Describe everything honestly, how a judge at a meeting cannot decide according to his heart, he needs evidence and proof, so you too be honest with yourself.

What happens is that if there are more minuses, then everything is obvious and your psyche will soon decide to give up thoughts about a man and go over to the side of “Good”, doing everything good for you.

If there are more advantages, then try to think, do other people have all these qualities? Is it possible to meet an even better person with the same characteristics? I understand perfectly well that you cannot order your heart, but you can re-realize all this and make a decision in favor of your emotional peace.

Each person is individual

Photo by Ivan Samkov: Pexels
In fact, this topic is as old as the world, and people have discussed it hundreds of thousands of times and will never be able to come to one correct decision. Why the betrayal of a man and a woman is not equal, why there is more demand from a woman than from a man, all these questions are relevant today.

Despite the fact that many institutes of family, sociology and psychology are working to study this “problem” and sometimes present very interesting assumptions and hypotheses to society, it is worth remembering one thing: each person is individual and it is simply impossible to equate everyone to one template.

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