Don't be alarmed if you suddenly like someone else while you're in a relationship... unless you're a completely immoral monster, of course. Even the most monogamous partners pay attention to the attractiveness of other people - and this is normal. The main thing is to remember that you are not entering into a relationship to cheat (whether out of resentment or boredom), since cheating is a sure-fire way to destroy trust and ruin everything.
Some people cheat on any partner they have, while others remain faithful throughout their lives, even in the most toxic relationships. By the way, you may think of yourself as the most reliable person, but you never know what exactly might lead you to cheat.
If you're wondering how susceptible you are to temptation, take this test to help you quickly figure out your weaknesses. Look at the image and capture the first thing that catches your eye.
Physical signs
On women's forums they often discuss how to tell if a guy is cheating on you by his testicles. This ancient test is indeed very effective, but it is extremely difficult to carry out without the man’s consent. You need to do it like this: the guy lies down in a bath of water. If he has recently had sex, the testicles will lie on the body under their own weight. If there was no sex, then the male “balls” will float freely in the water. Unfortunately, this folk method does not confirm the accuracy of infidelity 100%, so we advise girls to pay attention to other physiological signs of infidelity:
- Decreased libido. The lover not only avoids going to bed with his girlfriend, but actually does not want sex with her. Libido decreases due to the fact that he has enough pleasures on the side.
- Increased attention to your appearance. A man begins to lose weight, go to the gym, and is interested in fashionable new items in clothes and perfumes. This is due to the fact that he wants to look better for his mistress.
- Asymmetrical face during quarrels, a woman’s attempts to sort things out. Psychology has recognized the fact that sincere emotions are displayed on all parts of the face, but false ones are not. If a husband wants to hide a deception, he will try to lie, smooth out the conflict, and evade the answer. At this point his face will be asymmetrical. An example of this is a crooked smile.
- Straight back, chin raised up. If before the guy was hunched over, walking, looking at his feet, now his posture and head position will change. He is pleased with himself as a man, a male, he is filled with pride. His new love gave him confidence.
- Sight. Becomes wandering, secretive. If a guy does not want to part with his beloved, but started an affair out of boredom, then he is afraid that his eyes will give him away. He tries not to look at his deceived girlfriend, avoids talking face to face.
The most important reasons for cheating in married couples are getting used to each other and the desire for adventure and risk.
Reasons for betrayal
Many women know how to identify betrayal, but wives are in no hurry to understand its reasons, and even more so to admit that sometimes they themselves are to blame for it. But still, why do husbands cheat?
There may be several reasons, let’s consider the main ones. Very often, the love boat crashes in everyday life, and everyday problems become the cornerstone of the relationship. Then men begin to be drawn to places where there is no need to solve them.
Men cheat due to dissatisfaction with intimacy. A woman refuses sex, or is too cold. Then the spouse begins to satisfy needs on the side.
Sometimes the reasons lie much deeper. Falling in love gradually fades away, and the person dreams of experiencing euphoria again. Or a man wants to increase his self-esteem and again feel that he is popular with the opposite sex.
Leaving “to the left” can occur under the influence of relatives, friends, or when changing life guidelines. Frequent business trips also do not promote fidelity. In other cities and countries, husbands cheat most often.
According to statistics, more than 60% of men have cheated on their wives at least once, but at the same time, only 3% of husbands are ready to marry their mistresses. The rest prefer to stay married. If a wife, having learned about the affair, files for divorce, 97% of husbands have a negative attitude towards this.
Psychological signs
Women's intuition helps you find out if a guy is cheating. Take a closer look at the behavior of a potential liar, talk to him. Signs of infidelity will be the following:
- Indifference to sex. His heart and head are occupied with something else - new relationships, experiences. There is not enough mental strength for a friend.
- Increased attention to the legitimate girl. This is the other side of lying. Sometimes cheaters feel guilty for what they have done and become more attentive, caring and affectionate. If a guy begins to often give unexpected gifts, is too active in bed, and tries to improve your relationship for no reason, there is a reason to think about cheating.
- Often talks about the need for rest. It’s hard for a man to be torn on two fronts, he gets tired, so he complains to the woman about fatigue. If a man doesn’t have rush jobs or health problems, check his phone book for new female names.
- I fell in love with work and going for walks with the dog. If this has not been observed before, you should be wary. Probably, his new passion is where he wants to get to faster.
- Unclear expenses. The man stops bringing home his entire salary and spends the money on unknown needs. Your loved one will try to hide this fact, so keeping his wallet under surveillance will be very useful.
- Phone related anxiety. He does not leave the room if his smartphone is charging, he always carries it with him, he has set a password for his personal pages on the computer, and hides messages and calls.
- Frequent business trips, trips outside the city. It takes time to meet your lover. If a man is sent on work trips more often, there is a reason to call his boss and clarify the purpose of the business trips.
One sign from the entire list of signs cannot be fundamental and confirm betrayal 100%. There should be several of them. Therefore, do not start a major quarrel with a breakup right away, take a closer look at the behavior of the man over a longer period of time.
By correspondence
The question of how to understand that a guy is cheating by correspondence is often asked by teenagers to psychologists. Their communication comes down to sending each other messages; in reality, they see each other much less often. So, in SMS you can find the following signs of infidelity:
- He writes less often, more coldly.
- Stopped wishing good morning, good night.
- Doesn't send nice gifts or surprises.
- Doesn't like photos and doesn't respond to messages for a long time.
- He often sits online on social networks, but does not write anything to his beloved.
Family or divorce: so that your husband does not cheat
If betrayal occurs, it often leads to the collapse of the family. Therefore, women do not always want to know the truth and find out where their husband actually was. But then make sure that the family maintains a reverent, trusting relationship.
- Look for common interests. Visiting theaters and exhibitions, cycling, country walks will enliven your life and make it more interesting.
- Be an individual. Your husband should be interested in communicating with you. Therefore, communicate more, go to work, and do not turn into a nanny for your husband.
- Watch your appearance. Be a regular visitor to beauty salons and follow fashion. Always be beautiful and attractive.
- Reconsider your intimate life. Make it more diverse, don’t be afraid of unusual ideas and bold decisions.
- Don't limit a man's freedom. Let him meet with friends and have hobbies. Remember that prohibitions can have a negative impact on your relationship.
As you value your relationships and family, be considerate of yourself and your spouse. Don't let your relationship become a routine, find a way to bring something new into it.
On distance
Often men have affairs on the side when they are on business trips, go on shift, or serve in the army. It is impossible to look into the eyes of a sweetheart and detect a lie, so it is quite difficult to find out whether a guy is cheating on you from a distance. However, several signs of infidelity can be noticed even when thousands of kilometers apart:
- Talking on the phone. The unfaithful guy will change his intonation. If feelings have cooled down, he no longer misses his soul mate, he is distracted by another, he will speak dryly and use fewer affectionate words.
- Change of time for communication. If earlier you called a friend at strictly certain hours, for example, at 22:00, before bed or early in the morning, now he will free up this time for someone else. And you can talk to your beloved during your lunch break.
- New interests. This is an indirect sign of adultery, but it can also be used to understand that the guy is cheating and deceiving. Especially if the man is very lazy and does not like change. Perhaps his new girlfriend persuaded him to do such feats.
Test
If observations of your significant other do not yield anything, and anxiety and suspicion do not leave you, take the test for free. Answer simple questions and count your points. This will help you understand whether the guy has changed or whether his soul and thoughts are pure.
- Your boyfriend's daily routine has changed a lot lately: A. Yes, quite a lot. B. There are no changes. Q. Something has changed.
- Does the husband (boyfriend) leave his phone unattended: A. No, he carries it with him all the time. B. The smartphone is lying around freely anywhere. B. The phone is nearby, if he is driving in the car, sleeping.
- How can you characterize your relationship lately: A. We have grown apart, we don’t understand each other. B. We still spend time together, talk about everything. V. He is very busy, he is often not at home, I miss him.
- What is your relationship with sex: A. Intimacy has changed a lot. The husband is either cold or too passionate. B. There is no passion at all. V. Everything is stable.
- He often deceives you: A. Yes, I catch him in petty lies every day. B. I know everything, he doesn’t try to hide anything. V. It seems to me that he is lying, but I can’t prove anything.
- Do you know what his ex does and how she lives? A. Yes, she still pines for him. B. No, her husband does not remember her, they parted as enemies. V. Yes, this is my friend.
- How will he answer the question, can you cheat on me? A. No, never. B. There is a possibility. V. It depends on how you treat me.
The test results are deciphered as follows:
- If the letter A predominates in the answers, then the likelihood of betrayal is very high.
- Most of all, answer B means that your husband is as pure as a baby. There is no need to suspect him of treason.
- Frequent answers marked B indicate that the spouse or boyfriend is looking to the side. Try to prevent betrayal, pay more attention to your loved one.
How to recognize your husband's cheating on a business trip
Business trips are one of the main reasons that men go “to the left”. Up to 40% of husbands cheat on their other halves when they go on business to other cities or countries. Why? Away from his wife and family responsibilities, the man begins to feel like a bachelor again.
After a busy day, signing a contract in a restaurant or bar, a man meets an interesting woman, and under the influence of alcohol enters into a relationship. It is likely that in the morning he will regret what happened. But at the moment of the meeting he feels like a hero.
It happens that frequent business trips to another city entail the creation of another family. It is difficult to convict a husband of treason. First of all, finances can give it away, but not necessarily. You can't do this without a detective.
Psychologist's advice
To experience betrayal, namely betrayal from a loved one, means suffering, torment, and worry. To prevent despair from turning into psychological self-destruction, follow this path:
- Do not waste time on suspicions, even if they are obvious and do not require proof. Have an honest conversation with your loved one. It's better to hear the truth from him than to guess.
- Come to terms with what happened.
- If you decide to continue a relationship with a traitor, take his nature for granted. Be prepared to constantly be on the warpath with your significant other.
- Stop controlling your spouse if you have ever forgiven him for cheating. Don’t remember the insult every time you quarrel.
- Take a break from your relationship. You need to move away from stress and make an informed decision.
- If it is impossible to live together or date after cheating, break off the relationship completely.
- Seek help from a psychologist.