Everyone has faced a situation where big goals never became something tangible and real. Enthusiasm fades away - and it’s very difficult to force yourself to continue. It's a matter of internal resistance. A new look at this phenomenon and recommendations for combating your own stubbornness are offered by Danielle Laporte, author of the book “Live with Feeling.”
Any undertaking requires not only time and effort, but also quite strong motivation. As a rule, rarely does anyone experience problems with this at the start, but as you move forward, the desire to change something in your life becomes less.
This can also manifest itself in a sharply negative form (“Nothing worked out! I won’t try again”), and be disguised as a lack of time and constantly arising obstacles. An elementary example is playing sports. In the first days of training, you literally fly on the wings of a healthy lifestyle, not love, you feel great and full of energy, and two weeks later you find yourself a victim of a huge portion of pasta and a glass or two of dry wine, reclining on the sofa and peacefully reading the next business novel. What happened?
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Setting a goal
Without goals, a person's life becomes boring and uninteresting. After all, it is setting tasks and solving them that help us wake up and move forward, despite all the difficulties and obstacles along the way. Goals may not be particularly significant or, on the contrary, serious and difficult to achieve. But in order for all of them to be achieved, the correct goal setting is needed. And how to do it?
Every day we set ourselves certain tasks and fulfill them. But sometimes people tend to confuse concepts such as goal, desire and dream. In some ways they are closely related to each other and may be dependent on each other, but nevertheless they are different. Sometimes a desire develops into a goal, but it may remain just one phrase “I would like to...”. A dream is something magical and abstract. But as for the goal, it is always supported by certain actions and has a specific formulation. But in order to realize what is planned, it is necessary to correctly define the goal setting. As a rule, without a clearly formulated goal, it is difficult for a person to move forward. Thus, his life path becomes meaningless and empty.
Also, a given goal may not lead to the expected result. Achieving results directly depends on setting goals. This is explained by the fact that specific attitudes influence the subconscious, thereby attracting the right decisions and the right people into a person’s life. There is a certain system for achieving results, which includes a number of stages.
Perseverance and achieving goals
A personality trait that helps here is perseverance, that is, a strong-willed quality that allows you to achieve the desired results by following the decision made. Perseverance allows you to work even when a person has a complete lack of motivation. This path can be long and thorny, and the tasks can be overwhelming; however, when the desire to move on disappears, these personal characteristics allow you to maintain concentration on the task at hand.
No matter how strong-willed a person is, he can always become a little more persistent. To do this, it is necessary not only to correctly define the task, but also to organize your work properly. It must be performed using different methods and not cause exhaustion. To develop persistence, and therefore focus, it is also useful to choose a role model for yourself. These could be people who managed to overcome obstacles and achieve what they wanted: scientists, athletes, politicians, musicians.
Choosing goals
Think and write down your most cherished goals. It is important that they are not imposed by friends or relatives. To achieve the planned results, first of all, you need to choose a long-term goal. This may be what you desire most and with all your heart. Your dream should evoke feelings of slight excitement and inspiration. Once you've written down your main goal, write down at least five more life goals related to finances, family, hobbies, health or community. The model for assessing the achievement of the planned results of mastering this skill includes questions of the following nature:
- Who I want to be?
- What do I want to do?
- What do I need to feel completely happy?
- Will I get satisfaction from achieving my goals?
- What will happen when they come true?
Each goal should be recorded on a piece of paper, otherwise there is a chance that they will remain just a dream. Also pay attention to the wording. Replace the phrases “I want” with “I will” or “I have.” For example, instead of “I want to lose weight,” you should write “I will be slim.” “I want to avoid poverty”, “I don’t want to live with relatives”, “I want to get rid of extra pounds” - these are all incorrect negative formulations. It is important that your goals are clear and specific. For example, if you dream of a brand new car, then write down what brand, color and even equipment you would like.
What is success?
To talk about what kind of human qualities are necessary for success, first let’s figure out what success is?
Beauty, wealth, fame, talent, influence, luck. Any of these or all of them? Everyone has their own image of a successful person. Can an ugly or poor person be successful? Are there losers among the rich? What qualities does a successful person have?
First of all, successful people have an inner core that consists of values and certain character traits.
These are not always harmonious personalities. For example, Nikola Tesla was a brilliant scientist; many of his inventions still remain a mystery to us, although he created them at the beginning of the last century.
However, he was obsessed with his ideas and had no personal life, and he was not a “salesman” and much of what he did was not appreciated. Therefore, he often did not have enough money to finance his research and purchase equipment for it.
Or let's take a closer example - Steve Jobs. Only babies don't know about it. Successful? Definitely! Harmonious? No sir! He had huge health problems, not least due to excessive perfectionism.
He was also very difficult for both family and colleagues to interact with. But the man wanted to leave a “mark on the Universe” and, damn it, he left it!
Where does success come from?
Only our actions make us successful. We do them based on our values and character.
We have the power to strengthen character, develop qualities to achieve success in life, and also get rid of mental weeds: despondency, victim position, laziness, unconscious existence, apathy...
“A lucky person is a person who has done what others were just about to do.”
Jules Renard
But, if we do not take real action, then success can, at best, be a dream. Well, or we can watch how others achieve it.
Answer yourself the question, what is success for you? Take your time, think.
Do you want to achieve results in business, in relationships, in sports, or perhaps in spiritual practice? The qualities needed to achieve success, which you will read about in the article below, are universal. By developing them, you will ensure success in any business.
Buckle yourself to a chair! We begin
