Other people's opinions are like viruses. They infect. And it doesn’t matter how strong a person you are: other people influence your emotions and behavior. Such feelings and actions are actively circulating on social networks, and in terms of the nature of the actions, this is very similar to the flu epidemic, to its model of the spread of viruses.
A 2010 study published in the Proceedings of the Royal Society states that every positive person you let into your life increases your chances of being positive by 11%, while every negative person doubles your chances of being positive. you will become negative.
But the majority let almost everyone into their lives indiscriminately. Most people are too free-spirited about who they include in their social circle and what they take away from live interactions with these people when they listen to them chatter.
Most people passively allow detractors to share their very limited beliefs and opinions. For example, like this: “Your goals are unattainable. Only a fool would try to do such a thing.” Or: “Your goals are too easy. Anyone can do this."
It seems absurd, but most people make better decisions when they don't care what others think.
Do you understand? This is the key point. You will achieve more if you listen to your own inner voice. And period.
Because what you want to achieve in life is greatly influenced by what others want to achieve in life. Even if you just see or hear that someone wants something, you will want it too.
Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology shows that it is quite likely that people who observe someone striving for a certain goal will also strive for the same thing themselves. These same studies show that just reading about how someone is striving for a certain goal increases the likelihood that you will start striving for it too. It's the same with other people's advice about what they want for you: hearing that advice makes you more likely to want the same thing for yourself. Their recommendations influence your desires. This can change your motivation, often for the worse.
You are biologically programmed to imitate others.
You cannot solve a personal problem by applying someone else's solution to it. You cannot measure your capabilities using someone else's yardstick. But most people, when faced with difficulties, immediately rush to friends and family for help.
And they ask: “What should I do?” Or worse: “What do I really want? Who am I?" But others cannot answer these questions. You need to find the answers yourself.
The problem is that you were raised to value the opinions of others above your own. You have been trained to be like others, to think like them. Not only have you been taught to listen to others, but your very biology is designed so that you copy their behavior.
Your brain's mirror neurons make you automatically imitate what's around you.
For decades, experts have studied the powerful psychological factors that motivate you to fit in and fit in with those around you. These factors include groupthink, negativity bias, and the chameleon effect. You end up becoming a walking imitation. You are a natural follower.
Our tendency to move with the herd can harm us. Scientific research shows that people who are lied to are more likely to lie and cheat themselves [hereinafter, the author’s statements are based on scientific articles and books, a list of primary sources is contained in the notes to the book. — Approx. ed.].
Similar work shows that if your friend is obese, your chances of becoming obese yourself increase by 171%; If someone in your family smokes, then your chances of becoming a smoker yourself increase by 61%. The influence of others can have the same impact on your brain health.
HOUSEHOLD NEGATIVE
Household negativity - what is it? Is this type of negativity associated with damage, the evil eye or curses?
A publication about everyday negativity is long overdue; I constantly receive clarifying questions about what kind of dirty trick this is, where it comes from and how to deal with it. The explanatory article will be short, clear and understandable. Of course, I could pour a bucket of verbal “water” here and, pouring from empty to empty (as all hired copywriters do), produce a long and boring publication, but do you really need it?
POSSIBLE SOURCES OF OUR PROBLEMS
Every day I receive a lot of requests for diagnostics using photos in connection with the presence of certain problems in the areas of physical and mental health, finances, personal life, and family relationships. As a result of the diagnosis, it turns out that sometimes the causes of problems are of a certain “natural” nature: a consequence of incorrect personal decisions and environmental choices, illnesses and incidents of a “non-magical” nature, etc. Some problems have a karmic origin: tests and lessons sent down from above in response to misdeeds committed by us in this life or in previous incarnations of the soul. Other situations are really caused by magical negativity: damage, curses, stealers, evil eyes. But it happens that a person has accumulated a critical mass of so-called “everyday negativity.” That's what we'll talk about in this article.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE OF HOUSEHOLD NEGATIVITY FROM DAMAGE, CURSE AND Evil EYE?
Everyday negativity is fundamentally different from witchcraft damage in that any damage is done consciously and purposefully, by performing special ritual manipulations. Curses start their action when clearly expressed curse wishes are spoken accompanied by a high emotional background, with natural hysterical anger. The evil eye happens involuntarily, most often due to envy, and at certain moments of “peak envy.” But everyday negativity is a collection of ordinary (“everyday”) emotional garbage.
WHERE DOES HOUSEHOLD NEGATIVE COME FROM?
Firstly, this garbage comes from people who experience feelings of envy, hatred, contempt, and rejection towards you on a constant “sluggish” basis. For example, from an envious neighbor, a bitchy employee or an anecdotally harmful mother-in-law, regular vibes of everyday negativity emanate towards their energy victims. Secondly, especially large portions of energetic dirt accumulate when situations of mutual intolerance lead to serious quarrels, scandals, and verbal altercations. And finally, thirdly, we ourselves accumulate everyday negativity as a result of our negative emotions: worries, fears, attacks of anger and surges of bad mood.
HOW TO GET RID OF HOUSEHOLD NEGATIVES
Negative energy of this type can dissipate over time without any special manipulation. Usually it is replaced by positive emotions, meditation, work on one’s character, pleasant impressions, communication with nature, relaxation, the sea and everything else like that. But it happens that too much everyday negativity has accumulated, and then a person has quite tangible problems: he begins to get sick, becomes depressed, his affairs and relationships decline. The principle is the same as in the famous school mathematical problems about two pipes and a pool: if more dirty water comes in than goes out, the pool will overflow. And in this case, it may be reasonable to do professional cleaning of household negativity using special magical techniques. The word “professional” implies an appeal to a professional master, and not some simple rituals for oneself at home. But how can you understand what nature your pressing problems are: is it damage, karma, something “natural” or that same everyday negativity? The answer is at the very beginning of this article: diagnosis is done using a photo (or at a personal appointment, when the coronavirus saga ends).
Details about correspondence diagnostics using photos in the article:
«CORRESPONDENT MAGIC«
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Negative opinions can rot your brain.
The first step to a real breakthrough in life is to start ignoring other people's opinions. You must learn to take friendly advice more carefully. This is especially true in cases where the advice is negative.
Stanford University News reports research showing that when you're exposed to negativity for 30 minutes or longer, neurons in your hippocampus, the problem-solving part of the brain, die off.
Yes, negative opinions can literally rot your brain.
You may think you are doing a good deed when you allow people to vent to you or try to make them feel better. But that doesn't really make you
better. This reduces your mental energy levels and reduces your effectiveness.
In one study, 120 people were asked to either communicate with an unpleasant person or ignore him. Four minutes after the interaction, each subject was given an exercise that required unflagging mental concentration. Those who refused to communicate with unpleasant people showed better results than those who did talk to them.
Other experiences show that the desire to make others happy is always incredibly destructive. This can lead to burnout, reckless behavior, and even suicide. There is no virtue in listening to uninvited guests, especially their unexpected unpleasant thoughts.
Are you not convinced by all this?
Then here is a short list of how negative opinions and negativity in general can slowly destroy your life:
— With each new ill-wisher you let into your life, your chances of increasing your own negativity increase by 100%. However, each kind person you let into your life only increases your chances of increasing positivity by 11%.
- One bad friend will double your chances of becoming unhappy.
— The risk of dying at a young age increases by 50%. Those who give in to worries and the impulses of negative relationships are one and a half times more likely than others to die prematurely.
— The risk of developing heart disease increases by 34% in hostile relationships.
— Negativity has a direct connection with poverty and decreased brain activity.
— If you listen to an ill-wisher for at least half an hour, the neurons of your hippocampus, the part of the brain that is responsible for solving problems, begin to gradually die off.
— Working with a boss who is unfriendly to you significantly reduces creativity compared to those who work under a friendly person.
- Depression and anxiety. The risk of their development increases if you constantly complain about your problems.
- Low self-esteem. Listening to or observing unpleasant people interact will lower your self-esteem and increase your overall neuroticism.
Become aware of the false beliefs that shape your life
No one becomes an adult without “scars.” We live in a chaotic world that is beyond our control. Parents are getting divorced. Friends betray us. People often judge solely by their appearance: having acne or being overweight can be a reason for people to hate you. There is death, loneliness and internal scars that never fully heal.
Some start using alcohol and drugs. This is the only thing that can give them a shake and make them feel at least something. They call it “adjusting to an unjust world.” But in reality it is a form of escape. They will run, hide and be in the company of other people as little as possible.
Another version of the development of events is also possible: you enter adulthood and the countdown begins. Test results. University. Relationship. Interview. Fight for the best place in the office. Marriage. Children. Mortgage. Expectations. Depression. And, of course, eternal fear. You are hiding from life. All the “main action” begins to take place in your head, because it is safe there and no one can disturb you. This causes you to form a ton of false beliefs that snowball.
The above are two of the most categorical examples, however, if you do not find yourself in them, this does not mean that there are no false beliefs in your life. Here are the most common examples of common misconceptions.
I will never do anything great. I will never fall in love. I'll never be happy. I'm worthless. I owe everything to my parents. I can't. I will always have problems. I'm a victim. I'm not strong enough. If I'm not rich, no one will love me. I'm unattractive. If I don't earn this much money or achieve a certain status, I won't be able to become a good husband, dad, person, etc.
All false beliefs are directly manifested in our behavior. They determine the choices we make in work, relationships, how we communicate with parents, friends, colleagues. False beliefs influence every decision we make in life. They block many of our aspirations by telling us that we are not worthy.
Think about what your false beliefs are about love, work, people, your body, creativity, life in general? What can and cannot you actually do? What do you think you deserve?
Repeat again all the false beliefs you just listed. Now think about how your life would change if you got rid of them? Who would you be? What kind of people would surround you? What would you do with your life? Would your life be different from what it is now?
Life story
I remember once in the community of an online store selling baby strollers, I published a post where I indicated an additional 3% discount for subscribers. In fact, there were no discounts for the model discussed in the post. It so happened that one girl decided to order this particular model of stroller and was extremely outraged by the lack of a discount.
Oh, do you think the dialogue was constructive? Unfortunately no. The girl wrote a huge negative review in A4 format, where she described in great detail all the negative emotions she experienced and published this review on all our resources, in all social networks, under almost every post... Apologies in the comments, in messages, a call from the head of the company - nothing could not resolve the conflict.
Conclusion : content worth monitoring closely
