Self-realization is the realization of an individual's potential. How to realize yourself in life

October 10, 2018
Psychology of Personality
Denis Dmitriev

Any personality that is mature in a psychological sense has unique distinctive features that give it individuality. The question of a person’s self-realization lies in successfully completing the path of self-acceptance and self-knowledge, the ability to reveal one’s own capabilities and potential, finding one’s own field and satisfaction with the result obtained.

However, not every person has a need for self-realization. Some are not at all looking for ways to improve themselves and discover their talents, but live for momentary pleasures, that is, they “waste” their lives. Others still try to reveal their potential, but for the entire period allotted to them they never find purpose and peace, and do not achieve personal identity in adulthood.

The concept of human self-realization

This concept can be interpreted slightly differently in different areas, but the main essence remains the same in any of them. In a general sense, self-realization is the activation of the full potential and abilities of the individual, the active life position of the individual to realize their capabilities in various areas of activity and relationships within the framework of individual potential.

This process involves the realization of one’s own abilities, skills, knowledge and talents, regardless of whether they were innate or acquired. It is permissible to implement both prosocial and antisocial elements of implementation. Actions must always be purposeful and conscious, perceived by the individual as important components of his existence.

What ways can you realize yourself?

There are 4 main ways to show your potential:

Creation
Personal development
Professional growth
Social interaction

Each of them must be present in a person’s life. How a person tries to express himself in them is influenced by his childhood and adult behavior patterns.

The need for self-realization

Psychologists say that the needs for self-expression and self-realization of the individual are set by a person above all other needs. One way or another, most people constantly want to prove themselves in society, which is, in turn, one of the main drivers on the path of self-realization. A person, to one degree or another, strives to fully reveal himself and society, demonstrate his personal qualities, use knowledge and skills, carry out his desired plans and realize his talents.

Everyone strives to achieve what they want most. The need to become the best at something is as great as the desire to feel the satisfaction of being a winner. Society calls such people accomplished individuals. The modern world offers a greater number of ways to realize the potential of an individual, because hard physical labor and forced backbreaking activity are a thing of the past, however, ample opportunities are not always identical with easy achievement of the goal.

What does it mean to “realize yourself”?

Self-realization means two things. First, we must perceive ourselves as a kind of container of possibilities. As philosopher Martin Heidegger wrote, “I am the promise of possibilities.” In other words, I have potential. It consists of abilities and motives, of inclinations and desires. I am simultaneously shaped by what I am capable of doing and by what I want to do. Self-realization also implies that this potential should not be wasted. The reserve of possibilities that I feel in myself must be involved, it must be used.

It is important not only to perceive yourself as a person with opportunities, but also to translate them into actions; the transition from words to deeds is important. Let us remember the saying of Friedrich Nietzsche: “Become who you are.” The process of self-realization involves efforts aimed at self-improvement. I have to make an effort to do the best I can.

Stages of self-realization

Traditionally, this process involves two successive stages:

The formation of a general mechanism of self-realization.
Maintaining the functioning of the mechanism and improving it through self-management and self-knowledge.

The first stage of self-realization is the struggle between individualization and socialization. The outcome of this confrontation is marked by the formation of personality, the formation of certain abilities and skills, and the emergence of value guidelines. The end of this stage coincides with the period when a person managed to make some contribution to society and somehow realize himself in it.

At the second stage, the created mechanism is improved in every possible way, allowing you to achieve new goals and continue to hone your chosen skills, talents and abilities. The transition from the first to the second stage usually occurs with the end of schooling, while the first self-realization of students in society is typical for the preschool and school periods.

It is worth noting that some individuals never move to the second stage due to a lack of need for self-realization. They follow further by inertia or, as they say, “go with the flow.” Such people do not achieve their goals (or do not set them at all) and live exclusively in their own comfort zone, without leaving it unless absolutely necessary.

How to find yourself and your path to self-realization

Your life is going pretty well, but you still have the feeling that there is something important and necessary for you missing from it? In this case, you most likely have not yet found your life’s work, have not understood what your purpose is and how to properly implement it. It's never too late to start finding yourself!

Your task is to realize what inspires you and gives you joy, what opportunities you have not yet realized, where your skills, abilities, talents and aspirations can still be useful.

The following practices help in finding the right solutions:

Write down in your notebook 10 activities that bring you pleasure, that you are always happy to do, and that you are generally good at. Now look carefully at the resulting list and cross off from it the activity that you least want to do.
Gradually cross off activities from the list according to their priority and importance to you. Leave only 1-3 points and carefully analyze what these things are. In most cases, this is what you love to do, which you should do, and on which it is quite possible to build your own profitable business.
Think about how much money you need to feel like a happy person and allow yourself everything you want? Name the required amount per month, week, day. Now answer, what would you first spend the available money on, how much would you invest in the development of your ideas, and what would these ideas be?
Imagine that you were given 3 lives to live, or even 5. What would you do in each of these lives? What job would you choose?
Make a list of your significant goals for the next 5 years. Now imagine that you only have 2 years to live. What will you do first? If it turns out that your list of goals for 5 years is different from what you would do if you only had 2 years, then you are not doing what you would like to do now.

After you have completed all the exercises described above, you will have at least a rough idea of what you want to do in life, what you should do first, and what tasks you should focus your existing resources on.

And then the choice will be yours: do you want to follow your destiny, become a happy and fulfilled person, or is it easier for you to remain in the shadows, be content with what you have, continue to live according to the usual pattern in your comfort zone. If you still choose to act, then working methods for self-realization will be useful to you. Read about them further...

Ways of self-realization

Ways to realize oneself and one’s potential are, as a rule, available to a person from the very moment of birth. For the first time, children discover new skills, the use of which makes their lives more comfortable, interesting and happier. The first seed of self-realization is sown in early childhood, when the personality is just being formed and is not so much influenced by society.

During the period of growing up, society interacts more and more closely with the individual, saturating the only emerging picture of his world with an increasing number of different stereotypes. Subsequently, they become the foundation for a barrier in consciousness, which in all ways will block the path to self-realization of the individual and the discovery of his talents. Without overcoming social stereotypes and dogmas, human self-realization in any form becomes impossible.

What advice would you give to a young person to help them realize themselves?

I would tell him: your self-realization is a rocket with two engines. One depends on your abilities, talents, inclinations. The other works from motivation, from desire. Engines have different power and are not equally important. Mainly, what matters is the second engine – your aspirations and desires. Therefore, stop anxiously asking yourself: can you, do you have the ability to do anything. Better ask yourself if you want it. Listen to your deepest desires, that’s what matters most.”

Based on materials from //www.psychologies.ru/

Science's opinion on self-realization

The representative of humanistic psychology, Dr. Abraham Maslow, in his work noted a number of individuals who achieved self-realization. Among them were Albert Einstein, Eleanor Roosevelt and Abraham Lincoln. The psychologist's opinion was that achieving complete self-realization cannot be achieved without satisfying some basic human needs.

Examples of such needs are given in Maslow's hierarchy of needs. According to the specialist, these needs must be satisfied before embarking on the path of self-realization. It is also worth noting that Maslow used a slightly different term instead of the word “self-realization” - “self-actualization”. However, this term satisfies the basic definition of self-realization.

The reality is that most of the population of our planet cannot satisfy their own basic needs within the framework of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. This leads to the impossibility of activating self-realization mechanisms in many people. The psychologist classifies as such individuals those who cannot, for example, pay rent or buy food for themselves and their family. Lack of money leads to endless worries about how to pay off the next payment or pay for essential goods at the store. In this mode, a person begins not to live, but to survive. Accordingly, in such a situation, only a few are looking for an answer to the question of how to realize themselves in life and apply this to solve existing problems.

What prevents you from finding your way?

Confusion prevents you from finding your way, creating mental clutter. Mental trash includes negative emotions (anger, fear, anxiety, jealousy, resentment, etc.), complexes, limited ideas and beliefs, addictions and much more. There is so much such garbage that many are simply mired in it and have nothing left in life except problems.

Here's what you should think about: someone may say that they don't have education, income, or many other things, and therefore they can't find their way. However, history knows many cases when people, having nothing, achieved everything.

If a person has not yet managed to realize himself, this is not a reason to consider himself a failure. Many of the already famous and rich people were able to find their calling only in adulthood.

Religion's opinion on self-realization

Various world religions consider the problem of human self-realization from a different angle. The central role in the process is played by the human soul, which is not attached to the physical body and space, is a kind of ephemeral supreme being and completely occupies the body and consciousness of the individual. In order to reconnect with your present self, you need to leave the confines of your own body and consciousness.

In fact, in religious teachings, self-realization is the answer to the main question of the entire universe, the fundamental question: “Who am I?” The meaning of this answer through the realization of one’s own potential is that one’s own “I” is not the emotions experienced or the thoughts that arise, not the body or consciousness, but only the experience acquired over time.

People who are too closely connected with false manifestations of their own “I” waste all their energy and potential on negative experiences such as anxiety, fear and constant stress. As a result, thoughts, feelings, emotions and the physical body change, but the person himself remains exactly the same as he was at the very beginning of the path, that is, he does not develop and does not self-realize.

Difficulty levels

By analogy with a computer game, each participant in the game is assigned his own role, his own unique abilities-talents (his own unique equipment, his own type of weapon, his own tools). Each game has difficulty levels. For example: easy (light), medium (medium), hard (heavy). Anyone can overcome the first level of difficulty. At the second difficulty level, there is already a much greater return, but it is also more exciting. Very few pass the third level.

These levels of complexity are assigned to a person even before birth in accordance with his potential, as they say, “everyone is given according to his shoulders.” Of course, everyone has the opportunity to try to play on the most difficult level, but this is doomed to failure. The player will always lose in the very first minutes of the game. In this case, he can spend his whole life trying to take someone else's place. But if he had played his role, he would have been able to successfully complete all stages of the game, getting maximum pleasure from it.

Creative self-realization

Throughout all eras, the basis of any creative impulse has always been an attempt at self-realization of specific individuals. Creativity best reveals individual talents, embodies plans, and allows one to reach heights in social activities. Realization of potential is achieved by combining activities under the influence of society and personal beliefs. There is an opinion that only creative activity can expand the limits of the potential of an individual.

A creative approach is applicable to almost any field of human activity, be it cleaning the territory or playing the piano. This means that showing creative potential for personal self-realization is equally available to both the director who conducts business meetings and the worker working in a steel mill. Each type of creativity reflects, to a certain extent, the worldview of its author. Any creative beginning is an experience, which subsequently begins to be expressed in the individual’s own position.

The problem of personal self-realization in the professional sphere

The genesis of difficulties in personal self-realization in the professional sphere manifests itself at every stage of this process.

The stage of self-determination corresponds to high personality development. Consequently, a barrier in this situation may be the inability to determine one’s place in the system of social relations.

At the initial stage of professional development, the decisive role is played by the conformity or discrepancy between the expectations of the individual and the external conditions of life. If intrapersonal contradictions arise, dissatisfaction with the level of professional growth, self-development, this can lead to the search for new ways of performing professional activities or to a change in the type of activity.

During the transition from one stage of development to another, crises arise, on overcoming which the further prospect of self-realization depends. These processes can be caused by external circumstances - dismissal, retraining, graduation, etc., as well as internal psychological barriers.

The transition to the stage of professional growth may not take place, especially if the individual’s motive is “I want” rather than “I can” and “I must.”

At the stages of career development and growth, the following barriers most often arise, causing difficulties in professional self-realization:

Incorrect positioning – inappropriate reaction in the process of communication with the team and when performing assigned tasks (excessive emotionality, resentment towards colleagues, rejection of constructive criticism, etc.)
Lack of need and desire for self-development - the development of professional competencies requires constant self-education and self-improvement.
Lack of resources – unsatisfactory emotional and physical state.
Comparing yourself with more successful specialists leads to a decrease in self-esteem and a reluctance to strive for something.
Unjustified expectations of recognition of one's achievements - lack of praise for work done leads to stagnation of actions.
Lack of confidence in your professionalism - even with a high level of development in your field, you can be unsure of yourself.
Incorrectly set priorities - personal matters are more important than work interests.

Professional self-realization

A person’s career success is directly related to the realization of his potential in the eyes of modern society. The majority opinion is that a high status and position at work can be equated to successfully embarking on the path of self-development and self-realization. With the simplification of living conditions in the developed countries of the world, people began to devote more time to realizing their own potential in the professional field in search of the so-called place in the sun.

To begin with, a person must certainly find the right field of activity that is suitable for him, and then determine his own capabilities and potential ways of development in it. Creating conditions for self-realization within the boundaries of the chosen professional competence allows the individual to achieve the desired social status and level of well-being. Success in development will lead to the formation of the necessary abilities and skills in the individual, as well as to the development of the special thinking of a professional worker. The distinctive features of such thinking are the following:

awareness of one’s own importance for the profession;
understanding the belonging of one’s personality to work;
building a clear plan for self-realization in your future career and life in general;
a fair assessment of the importance of recognition of the individual by society;
the ability to find your weaknesses and strengths, which in the future will become a fulcrum for achieving new heights.

What is self-realization

According to the “pyramid of needs” by the popular American psychologist Abraham Maslow, the desire for self-realization is at the very top of human desires, being the highest measure of personal development.

A. Maslow's pyramid of needs

By the way, A. Maslow, having analyzed the character of people who have achieved something in life, identified the main signs of self-actualized individuals:

- They know how to determine reality from fantasies better than others - They perceive themselves as they are - They love simplicity, naturalness, they have no need to play in public - Very responsible people who know how to make the necessary decisions - They have a high degree of self-sufficiency - They can withstand trials and blows more easily than others » destinies - They regularly re-evaluate their life guidelines - They never cease to be surprised by the world around them - They feel their fullness and inner harmony - They study without problems - They have their own views on the world, on the concepts of good and evil - They are restrained, friendly, value a sense of humor - They regularly generate new ideas, love creativity - Tolerant of others, but if necessary, show courage and determination - Loyal to their family, friends, ideals, principles

Need for self-realization

These are spiritual needs. The expression of these needs is based on the satisfaction of all previous needs.

New dissatisfaction and new anxiety appear until a person does what he likes, otherwise he will not find peace of mind.

Spiritual needs find self-expression through creativity and personal self-realization. A person must become what he can be. Every person is amazingly rich in ideas, but he must be convinced of this.

Firstly, the needs of the lower levels must be satisfied first, and only after that is it possible to address the needs of the highest levels.

In other words, a person experiencing hunger will first seek to find food, and only after eating will he try to build a shelter. You can no longer attract a well-fed person with bread; bread is only interested in those who don’t have it.

Living in comfort and security, a person will first be motivated to activity by the need for social contacts, and then will begin to actively strive for recognition from others.

Only after a person feels inner satisfaction and respect from others will his most important needs begin to grow in accordance with his potential.

But if the situation changes radically, then the most important needs may change dramatically. For example, at some point an employee may sacrifice a physiological need for the sake of a safety need.

When a worker whose lower-level needs have been satisfied is suddenly faced with the threat of job loss, his attention immediately shifts to the lowest level of needs.

If a manager tries to motivate workers whose safety needs (second level) are not yet met by offering a social reward (third level), he will not achieve the desired goal-oriented results.

If at the moment the employee is motivated primarily by the opportunity to satisfy safety needs, the manager can be confident that once these needs are satisfied, the person will look for opportunities to satisfy his social needs.

A person never experiences the feeling of complete satisfaction of his needs.

If the needs of a lower level are no longer satisfied, the person will return to this level and remain there not until these needs are fully satisfied, but when these needs are sufficiently satisfied.

It must be taken into account that the needs of the lower level form the foundation on which the needs of the higher level are built.

Only if lower-level needs remain satisfied does the manager have a chance to succeed by motivating employees through satisfying higher-level needs.

In order for a higher level of the hierarchy of needs to begin to influence human behavior, it is not necessary to satisfy the need of the lower level completely.

For example, people usually begin to seek their place in a certain community long before their security needs are met or their physiological needs are fully satisfied.

The key point in the concept, Maslow's hierarchy of needs, is that needs are never satisfied on an all-or-nothing basis.

Needs overlap, and a person can be motivated at two or more levels of needs simultaneously.

Conditions for self-realization

In order for a person to make the most of his abilities in life, it is necessary to observe some important points. It is worth noting that all components are closely related to each other.

You cannot cultivate one thing and completely ignore the other. The conditions for personal self-realization are simple and complex at the same time. The most important thing, perhaps, is the inner attitude.

If the goal is set clearly enough and you find out what you really want. What you want will come into your life faster than you expect. This will happen so naturally and calmly that not everyone will be able to recognize happiness.

Creating conditions for personal self-realization allows you to successfully achieve the desired activity and begin to develop it.

Possibility of self-realization

Also, traditions, foundations, and stereotypes accepted in the social environment have a separate influence on the possibility of self-realization for an individual, which often turns out to be the strongest.

The biggest enemy of self-realization are stereotypes imposed by society. Therefore, the first step on the path to personal self-realization will be getting rid of the standards and templates imposed by society.

As a rule, the opportunity for self-realization appears in an individual in several different types of activity, and not in one.

So, for example, in addition to professional fulfillment, most individuals strive to create strong family relationships, have true friends, entertaining interests, hobbies, etc.

Based on this perspective, a person plans an appropriate life strategy, i.e. general aspiration of life's path. Such strategies should be divided into several main types.

The first type is a strategy for life well-being, which consists in the desire to create favorable conditions for life.

The second type is a strategy for success in life, which consists of striving for career growth, conquering the next “peak”, etc.

The third type is a life realization strategy, which embraces the desire to fully develop one’s own abilities in selected activities.

The process of personal self-realization

This process involves the implementation of one’s internal resources and abilities, congenital and/or acquired, regardless of whether these abilities are pro or antisocial.

The individual, first of all, is required to actively make volitional efforts in the context of specific activities.

There are a number of factors, in the absence of which the process of self-realization is in principle impossible. These include the upbringing and culture of the individual.

In addition, each society and each individual social group, which includes the family system, develops its own standards and levels of personal development.

Ways of self-realization

In order to understand the ways of self-realization and understand exactly how, in what area you can reveal and realize yourself, first of all, you need to understand yourself.

How to understand yourself? Only through relationships with other people, only in interaction with people, only in activities.

Understanding yourself, revealing your talents, realizing all your strengths and weaknesses, you need to accept and love yourself for who you are.

The next step towards self-realization is intensive work on yourself and your internal positive qualities, your talents that need to be developed.

Determine your values in life, what is important to you and what is secondary. Answer the questions about who I am and what I am like at 30 years old, 40 years old, 50 years old, etc.

You need to determine the area of activity in which you like to engage. Setting your goal is a fundamental point in realizing your potential. Answer yourself the questions: “What exactly do I want?”, “When exactly do I want to achieve this?”

Believe in yourself. If not, develop through actions. As soon as the goal is determined, you must immediately begin to take action to realize your goal, do not hesitate, doing your job in the best possible way, with maximum impact.

Be devoted to your dream, do not stop there, always strive forward. A strong desire and need to do what you love. When you believe that you will do what you love no matter what, you know that you are close to self-actualization.

Make as many mistakes as possible, just remember one thing. Don't make the same mistake twice. And you will grow. Osho.

The problem of self-realization

The problem of self-realization was an aspect of the studies of the American psychologist A. Maslow. The scientist believed that a person’s need for self-actualization, self-expression, self-realization of inherent potential is at the highest level, “decorating” the pyramid of needs.

Maslow believed that satisfying this highest need is the most difficult task in comparison with overcoming the initial levels: needs of a physiological nature (the need for food and water, for rest), for safety and social aspects (friendship, love, respect).

According to the psychologist, no more than 4% of the human population manages to reach such a high “bar” of the pyramid, while satisfying even 40% of the thirst for self-realization, the individual feels happy.

On the path of personality development and its ultimate goal - self-realization, serious psychological problems often arise caused by a clear discrepancy between energy potential, intellectual capabilities, the level of acquired skills and knowledge and the degree of actualization of skills in reality.

Due to various circumstances: intractable or ineradicable interference from the external environment (for example: living in a zone of a protracted military conflict), interfering internal factors (for example: poor eyesight with a natural talent for drawing), a person’s true abilities do not coincide with the desired end result of the activity.

This discrepancy between possibilities, aspirations, and desires with the actual situation in life leads to a feeling of dissatisfaction, and in some people it potentiates pathological mental deviations.

Social self-realization

This type of realization of personal potential correlates more than others with the spiritual growth of the individual. Why? Social self-realization is, first of all, a person’s dedication, the ability to do something selflessly and voluntarily for others.

Often people realize themselves through society through various volunteer activities. Social workers, for example, provide physical and mental assistance to those who are below the poverty line or have experienced a natural disaster. From helping others, the individual receives spiritual rewards and personal development in this direction. In this case, material reward is not a priority for the individual, a goal of self-realization.

Ways for women to realize their potential

If creative, professional and social self-realization is not sufficient or interesting for a woman, then she can choose another path of personal development. Then representatives of the fair sex ask a completely logical question: “How can a woman realize herself in the modern world?” Many girls see themselves in the role of a loving wife, homemaker and good mother. Family happiness and care for loved ones are put at the forefront.

Psychologists consider female self-realization to be the only true and inherent nature as the main purpose. Most girls do not feel happy, complete and fulfilled without realizing their own potential in love, creating a family and caring for children. Each of the listed components of self-realization for girls is an integral link in the difficult task of building a strong and happy personality.

Components of success in self-realization

Psychologist S. Maddi conducted extensive research and built on their basis a theory of personality that has the makings of realizing one’s own potential. Among the characteristics of a fully functioning individual, he cited the following:

Availability of creative potential.
Feeling of independent control of life.
Possession of free will and action in all life situations.
Spontaneous decision making in different environments.
High level of adaptability, increased mobility.

These characteristics in themselves do not guarantee self-realization. According to many psychologists, it is not so much innate qualities that are important as acquired ones. A special role in setting on the path to realizing an individual’s potential is played by self-confidence, purposefulness, determination, healthy passion, love of work and awareness of the goal. In addition, such a person must be able to quickly select, change and supplement strategies, adapt to changing conditions and change tactics if necessary, but at the same time remain sober and calm.

Some look at the problem of self-realization from the point of view of humanistic psychology, while others rely on religious dogmas about the presence of a soul in every person. What support and basis to choose for starting to move towards realizing your own potential is a strictly individual question. Nevertheless, it is known that regardless of the fulcrum, the successful application of knowledge and skills in the areas chosen by the individual for self-realization is an invariable component of finding happiness in life.

Internal obstacles to self-realization

Some of them are psychopathological in nature; neuroses and depression pump energy out of us and prevent us from realizing ourselves. It happens that “limiting thoughts” become an obstacle. Some of us are filled with fear, timidity, fear of failure, and lack self-confidence. Sometimes negative thoughts are added to this, which destroy the desire itself, which ultimately leads to the fact that we voluntarily give up our aspirations and cross out our dreams. “It’s too late” is an attitude that interferes with self-realization. Conversely, our self-realization may be hindered by the too majestic picture that we mentally draw. Inordinate ambition, a thirst for fame, a desperate desire for brilliance can paradoxically lead to defeat. Just like the idea of “overcoming oneself”, the symbol of which was Nietzsche’s superman. I am opposed to such a romantic vision of self-realization, the goal of which is necessarily exclusivity, genius, heroism and superiority. It is within our power to achieve self-realization in the field of everyday life. You don't have to do extraordinary things to realize yourself. Another obstacle is solipsism, which proudly declares: “I will make myself.” But self-realization, whether we like it or not, occurs in connection with another person. She needs friendly support, tenderness, love and trust in others. At the beginning of Victor Hugo's novel Les Miserables, there is a wonderful episode in which Jean Valjean, returning from hard labor, is saved thanks to the kindness of Monsieur Bienvenu. In order for Valjean to become a different person, it was necessary for someone to believe in him. Hugo's entire narrative, in essence, is the story of personal transformation, accomplished by the magical magic of mercy and trust. And finally, the last trap: hyperactivity, unrestrained activity. Of course, action is necessary for self-realization, but it is still important to ensure that you do not turn into a hyperactive fidget.