How to stop being shy about your body: Pixabay How to find happiness and harmony if, in pursuit of beauty standards, you are embarrassed about your body? You don't have to be like Kim Kardashian or Angelina Jolie. It is important to learn to appreciate the individual characteristics of your body. Experienced psychologists suggested how to do this.
Look at yourself in the mirror
Embarrassment and complexes about the body go away in the process of self-acceptance. Looking at yourself in the mirror helps with this. Psychologist and body-oriented therapist Olesya Ponomarenko recommends doing this:
- Take 10 minutes every day to look at yourself carefully in the mirror.
- During the exercise, focus on the positive aspects of the body, on those parts that you like. For example, don't think about weak biceps or short legs. Pay attention to the color of the eyes, hair, beautiful shoulder line.
This technique affects self-perception and helps to form an internal attractive image of oneself.
Why should you stop being shy about your boyfriend and how to do it?
At any moment, the calm and measured life of a young representative of the fairer sex can be interrupted, and the reason for this will be meeting the guy of her dreams. At first, the girl is unlikely to trust him 100%, but excessive embarrassment will also not bring any benefit - in this case, the relationship between the young people will end before it even begins.
You shouldn't be shy about guys for the following reasons:
There is a chance that the guy is shy too, and this is another obstacle in the relationship. Most likely, the young man already has experience communicating with girls, against the background of which an overly timid chosen one will look at least stupid. So as not to feel awkward. If the same guy were the girl's cousin, would she be shy in front of him?
How to get rid of shyness in front of a guy: general tips
In order for the excitement to begin to go away little by little, you can imagine that the first acquaintance has already passed. But when you begin to eradicate shyness, you should not get too carried away, because this trait is an indicator that the girl has a subtle and sensitive nature that is capable of empathy and love.
You can overcome shyness in front of a young man in stages, in four steps:
First of all, the young lady needs to think: how would she like to see herself next to a guy; What traits would she give to the main character if she were writing a novel about herself? Having decided on the image, you need to find out what will be required to bring your plan to life? Perhaps these are neat low-heeled shoes, thanks to which their owner will not feel like a “giraffe”. Or maybe it’s about a stylish hairstyle that can give a girl self-confidence? The list of options for getting rid of shyness in front of a guy is endless, so you need to approach this issue depending on your circumstances. What about an act that previously seemed completely fantastic to our heroine? For example, you can, without waiting for a guy’s initiative, invite him for a walk, and during the walk also offer him a taste of a pie that the girl herself baked according to her grandmother’s recipe. A young man is unlikely to refuse such an offer, because guys are also lovers of sweets! By following the first three points, the girl will become much more confident in herself. And then, calling on his imagination to help, he will begin to experiment. If your thoughts are busy with new ideas, and your time is busy with their implementation, then there will be no time to be shy!
Write a letter to the body
To change your attitude towards your body deeply, try the writing technique. Write a detailed letter to the body:
- First, describe all the grievances and accusations that are associated with your body and appearance.
- Then write words of gratitude and encouragement to your body.
Compose a second letter from the body to you. Write it with your left hand. This technique will help turn off rational thinking and make the presentation of thoughts more emotional. Think about what your body might have to say about you and what it might be grateful for.
Keep your comments to yourself
“How can people be so rude? Everyone knows that I have gained weight in my life. I gave birth to two children, so it's inevitable. Do I understand that I am overweight? Yes. Do I want to be smaller? Yes. But am I okay with the way I look now? Yes!" Charlie Stevens.
The Russian Ministry of Construction has authorized the construction of an aluminum automobile bridge
Strict and romantic: trendy multi-tiered skirts for spring 2021
30-40 million have suffered from Covid: the doctor spoke about herd immunity among Russians
Speak affirmations
Silhouette of a girl: Pixabay
Affirmations, that is, positive statements in the present tense, help you accept and love yourself, your body, increase self-esteem and achieve many goals in life.
Sexologist and marriage therapist Natalya Rusetskaya advises the following:
- Choose two short and meaningful phrases related to the installations you would like to purchase. For example, “I look luxurious” and “I am loved and in love.”
- Twice a day, go to the mirror, look at your reflection and repeat these phrases out loud for 5 minutes.
Phrases such as “I fully accept myself and my body”, “Each person is unique and beautiful in their own way”, “I have my own magnetism and sexuality” help in overcoming embarrassment and complexes.
#TheySaid campaign
Anyone who has experienced being bullied because of their appearance knows that it always starts with someone deciding to open their mouth and say something unpleasant, inappropriate, and even indecent. Most often, these words remain only in the head of the person who heard them. That is why the #TheySaid campaign was founded, in which people share similar statements.
Allow yourself half an hour of nudity a day
Many people are embarrassed to expose their bodies in front of other people, including partners. In such situations, Olesya Ponomarenko advises spending at least half an hour a day naked, periodically looking at yourself in the mirror:
- Do this technique when no one can see you.
- Create the right lighting to highlight your best features, such as lighting candles.
- Don’t just stand and look at yourself, but do face masks, take care of your body, or drink tea, sometimes looking at your reflection.
If you experience discomfort even when alone, start with shorter sessions and dimmed light. Over time, you will notice that such an exercise affects both your sense of self and your communication with others.
How has body fashion changed throughout time?2
Beauty standards are constantly changing. And to date they have already gone through more than a dozen stages. But the most memorable ones over the past 100 years are the following:
- 1910s. The lady should be thin, have a small waist, large breasts, and wide hips. Most often, girls wore corsets and also emphasized the length of their necks.
- 1920s. There was an androgynous figure present, which very often resembled the body of a boy.
- 1930s. The teenage girl was replaced by beautiful curves, large breasts, and a thin waist.
- 1940s. Most often in the post-war years, large shoulders prevailed, the figure was dense. And it was considered attractive.
- 1950s. The image of Marilyn Monroe can perfectly describe the image of the standard girl. Long and slender legs, big hips, beautiful breasts. The hourglass figure has returned to fashion.
- 1960s. Here fashion returned again to the 1920s, but much worse. Girls practically did not take care of themselves and raised protests against beauty standards.
- 1970s. An athletic body, an elastic butt, health and strength came into fashion.
- 1980 The general trends are maintaining proper nutrition, regular exercise, and a toned, beautiful female body.
- 1990s. This is the era of Kate Moss, when tall height, a boyish figure, and also a certain thinness came into fashion.
- 2000. The fashion for beauty standards is completely changing. The figure should be slim and athletic. No big breasts or butts.
- 2010. Curvy figures have come into fashion, but here there is still an emphasis on an athletic body.
Play some sports
To overcome self-consciousness, it is important to feel like a woman who takes care of her body and loves herself. Playing sports or dancing or visiting the pool will help you gain this feeling and make your body healthier and more athletic. Fit and confidence will come from outside and help you gain self-confidence.
Look for motivation in future results:
- Imagine what you want to achieve, what you will look like after, for example, a month of classes.
- Mentally transport yourself to this time and imagine your feelings.
Wear nice underwear and clothes
Firstly, seductive lingerie and beautiful clothes help you feel desired and sexy. Secondly, with the help of clothes and accessories you can successfully emphasize all the advantages of your figure.
Think over a basic wardrobe taking into account your lifestyle, make a shopping list and gradually bring it to life. Shopping and trying on will become a source of pleasure and a great mood. Kim Kardashian has the same opinion.
Take care of your body
In system-vector psychology there is the following thesis: when a person does something that brings pleasure, he opens a source of a powerful energy charge. Life seems to start anew, a person likes himself, including accepting his body. Life becomes interesting and joyful.
Make caring for your body a pleasure to get to know and love it better:
- Do regular body treatments yourself or at a salon.
- Eliminate junk food from your diet.
- Give up bad habits.
Ways to solve the problem
If you want to enjoy your intimate life, learn to feel yourself and your partner, then you should act immediately. Advice will help you, thanks to which you will relax in bed and stop being shy, you will notice how you begin to enjoy a full act of love.
We create an environment that helps you not be shy in bed
You should prepare for a love event. In order not to be shy with your loved one in bed, you need to create comfort for yourself, which consists of three components:
- Convenience. Prepare a romantic place: fresh linen, a wide bed, a clean room, towels, and protective equipment at hand. You can use various romantic things - candles, aromatherapy.
- Privacy. To create the appropriate atmosphere, nothing should disturb you: neither parents nor children sleeping outside the door. To be calm and give yourself 100% to the caresses, you need to be sure that you are alone.
- Mood. To have relaxed sex, you should feel your partner and be in a good mood. If you are haunted by bad thoughts or events of the past day, then you cannot start sex in this mood.
READ A girl doesn't want sex: in search of physiological and psychological reasons
Admit that he likes you
Psychologists say that a man will communicate with a woman only when she is sexually attracted to him. When he finds himself in your bed, understand that he is not just attracted to you, but sexually attracted to you.
A man perceives a woman as a whole, along with all her shortcomings and body features. If he started a relationship with you, then he definitely examined the size of your breasts and waist size, he is satisfied with everything. When there is a naked girl in front of a man who is inclined to be intimate with him, he does not pay attention to the little things.
Looseness in bed and appearance
If you want to know how to not be shy with a man in bed, then you should take action. A woman needs to accept herself and love every piece of her body. It is necessary to understand every day that you are unique and unique.
Before the upcoming act of love, you need to prepare for it. This applies to appearance: tidy up your body, get a manicure, pedicure, put on beautiful underwear, take time to do your hair and makeup. When a woman knows that everything is perfect for her, she can get rid of tension.
Underwear
To make a girl feel confident, be sure to pay due attention to her underwear. Choose a suitable set that will highlight your strengths and hide your weaknesses. You will be able to increase your sexuality. This outfit will help a woman to relax and a man to experience maximum desire for her. It has been proven that a woman in beautiful lingerie is much more of a turn-on than just being naked.
If a man wants to liberate his girlfriend and make her not feel shy, he should give her several sets of underwear and negligees. When she puts them on, he will admire her beauty.
Cosmetics
Even if your boyfriend claims that he loves you without makeup, believe me, makeup won't hurt. But avoid flashy evening makeup with bright scarlet lips. It will be unpleasant for your partner if your lipstick remains on his face. But when it's a nice scent that makes your lips moist and delicious, he'll happily lick them. Makeup can help a girl when she is shy in bed, emphasize a woman’s passionate gaze, and make her face more sophisticated and attractive. To look charming, pay attention to beautiful makeup.
Perfume
Smells attract people on a subconscious level even before they are in the same bed. If you learn to control aromas, you can liberate yourself. It is recommended to use a small amount of perfume with a light, unobtrusive scent. Under no circumstances should you douse yourself with perfume, because if it remains on your body, then the taste of your skin will be unpleasant. When a woman knows that she smells good, it will help her become more relaxed during sex and give a man the opportunity to smell her body.
READ How to politely refuse a nice guy without offending him
Trust and sex
If you understand that you cannot feel free in bed with a regular partner, then first you need to become more relaxed in communication and actions. You need to sincerely trust the person you are planning sex with. You can directly talk about your feelings, desires, talk with your partner about sex, his interests and your desires. There is nothing shameful in this, it is normal for adults.
Sex is an integral part of life, which you can discuss, like any other things, such conversations will bring you closer.
Liberation through sports
When a girl has flaws, it seems to her that she is not fit and slim enough, then she needs to take care of herself and fight her complexes with the help of sports training. It is important for a woman to be flexible and graceful, so it will be useful for her to take up aerobics, fitness, swimming or oriental dancing. She will improve her emotional state, become relaxed with her partner in bed and will not be shy.
Contact a psychologist
There are many reasons for not accepting your body, and it is not always possible to figure them out on your own, as psychologist Olga Agafonova emphasizes. Thus, excess weight can be a protection from the outside world, give weight in society and even serve as a protection from intimacy, a ban on romantic relationships.
In such situations, diet and exercise alone will not help. You need to start with your inner world, which can be difficult to deal with on your own, so you should consult a psychologist.
Relationships with the body are multifaceted and consist of different aspects. It is important to start with taking care of the body, gradually developing acceptance in order to say goodbye to complexes and embarrassment. Each person is unique, including in terms of body, the main thing is to love yourself.
Original article: https://www.nur.kz/family/self-realization/1648820-kak-perestat-stesnyatsya-svoego-tela/
"Healthy" is the new "thin"
“Every time I post a workout video, I get comments like, 'You'll never be skinny, so stop trying,' 'Don't train too hard, you'll become skinny,' 'You need to be fat to be a model.' and “Why do you want to get rid of what made you famous?”, to which I answer that I exercise to be healthy, to feel good, to cheer myself up, to clear my head, and so on.” Ashley Graham.
