The behavior of some men seems very strange. Just yesterday he confessed his love to you and today he plays a silent game? Although this behavior is more common among girls, some men are also prone to similar behavior.
If you have no luck in relationships with almost all men, and you find a lot of strange things in their behavior, we recommend reading this article. Most likely, any woman will find the answer to her question here. These situations will probably seem more than familiar to you:
- You met a man and a seemingly strong relationship begins. But suddenly the man begins to treat you coldly and distance himself. It is quite possible that he then begins to avoid meeting you, hiding behind work or illness, and then disappears altogether.
- You love a man, do everything to please him, try to please him. However, he is indifferent to this and is interested in something completely different, sometimes in other women.
- It happens that you are often visited by thoughts about your unattractiveness. You think that men see you only as a shell and do not feel any attraction to you because of this.
- Many of the people you meet are not right for you. You think that you have met absolutely the wrong men.
- After a sufficient period of time, they remember about you only if the man needed something.
- In the end, thoughts come to you that you will never find your man.
There have been many women who gave up and grew old with these unhappy thoughts. However, if you found this article and decided to read it, then you are one of those who is going to solve this problem in the struggle for their happiness and, most likely, have already asked the question: “Why do men behave this way?” Let's try to figure it out.
Riddle 1: HE avoids meeting
Let's assume this situation. You met somewhere at a party, you struck up a conversation, a spark flew, you chatted all night, exchanged phone numbers, started texting or on social networks. Your communication is very interesting to both of you, this is clearly visible from the long correspondence and various topics discussed. And so you decided to invite him to finally meet again. But he suddenly began to evade all your proposals and hints, that is, to evade the meeting.
There is no need to rush to conclusions that he has someone else or that he is not interested in you. Most likely, he doubts himself, that is, that he might be interesting to YOU. And if you met on the Internet and haven’t seen each other at all, then he may well be ashamed of his appearance and some shortcomings. It is possible that he simply does not know how to communicate with girls, even if you have had a whole night of dancing behind you (alcohol and a free environment can temporarily overcome embarrassment). In such a situation, you need to continue to periodically playfully pester him about the meeting, try to make unobtrusive compliments in conversations, and talk. that you are having fun and interesting with him . If this is the reason, then you will definitely finally meet, and he will be grateful to you for not leaving the distance and helping him overcome himself.
But if your correspondence gradually fades away, and it is he who stops responding to your messages, then his interest in communicating with you has disappeared and it would be better to leave him alone, forget about him.
Mistakes in female behavior
Women who are tormented by the question: “My husband is ignoring me, what should I do?” often seek psychological help. The spouse cannot understand on her own what led to the deterioration of the relationship, what was done wrong and alienated her loved one. What features of female behavior provoke ignorance from a man?
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- The young lady dissolves in her beloved, lives by his interests and loses her individual zest.
- A man ignores the woman he likes if she constantly interferes in his affairs, gives out unnecessary advice, doubting his partner’s competence.
- The girl allows the guy to behave inappropriately, forgiving all insults and insults. Over time, such relationships become the norm, and the individual allows him to simply not notice the fair sex.
Riddle 2: HE doesn’t think about serious relationships, but only flirts
There are situations when he can surround you with attention, care, affection, but he cannot cross the line of flirting. From his advances you feel that you are about to start a relationship, but there is still like an invisible wall between you. Time passes, but he still does not take steps towards real rapprochement. He will most likely suppress attempts to talk about this topic and constantly evade the answer, turning everything into a joke. A question is brewing in your head: what does he want from you then? Nothing but flirting?
Do not rush to draw conclusions; it is possible that he has not yet fully learned to show real frankness and tenderness, or that he has had unsuccessful relationships in the past, so he is not rushing things. If he's not playing with you and he really likes you, then you just need to wait a little while continuing to get closer to his heart. If you are really interested in him, then try to just enjoy the communication that you already have . At the same time, no one is stopping you from captivating him, teasing him and even seducing him, but just don’t make this a priority goal. If your interest is mutual, then no matter the walls and restrictions in your head, at some point he will not be able to resist and your communication will turn into a relationship.
Your partner is unkind
It is very difficult for men to openly show their affection. As we already know, society does not encourage this. Only a limited circle of guys manage to cope with stereotypes. If your man was raised in strictness, he is unlikely to want to publicly demonstrate his love for you. Come to terms with it and accept it as a fact that you can’t do anything about. Most likely, his parents taught him to protect a woman and take care of her. Love and affection were not on the list of priorities. If this depresses you greatly, you may not have found your happiness yet. If you look at this strangeness with understanding, then your couple has a chance for the future.
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Riddle 3: With friends HE changes
When you are alone with him, he behaves like a real gentleman: he looks after you, gives compliments. At such moments you really feel loved and desired. But as soon as you cross paths with his friends, all the romance evaporates. For example, he starts teasing you, making witty jokes, or even pretending that you are not dating at all.
Of course, you will immediately be shocked! But don't panic ahead of time. Such behavior is indeed difficult to immediately accept and forgive, but you can try to understand it. You may think that he is embarrassed by you in front of his friends. But the matter may be different: perhaps he could not find a compromise between two models of behavior. That is, by the behavior that is accepted in his circle of friends, and by the behavior that occurs in private. In such a situation, it is worth hinting to him that if he does not want to lose you, then let him put your relationship as a higher priority . After all, friends are friends, and you are his beloved, who has the right to count on the fact that he should be proud of you and not be embarrassed to show his feelings for you in front of his friends.
There is a second option, when a guy has low weight in the company of his friends and tries to rise in their eyes at the expense of you. Since this behavior is subconscious and goes unnoticed by him, the easiest way to change it is with an ordinary calm conversation in private. Tell him what a strong and real man he becomes when he behaves like a man with you: caring, respectful, gentle . That all your girlfriends and friends notice his behavior and respect him, and they envy you. Explain to him that he will rise in the eyes of his friends when he behaves in the same way with you in their company. If you speak calmly, confidently, without accusations, he will understand and gradually change his behavior in front of his friends.
He ignores arguments or gives up quickly
When it comes to conflicts, women, as more emotional natures, find themselves in their native environment. They can argue and sort things out for hours, but men don’t like it at all. Representatives of the stronger sex are more rational; they do not lay out trump cards on the table in the form of reinforced concrete arguments, but prefer to quickly forget about the conflict. Men will not remember the essence of the dispute and will prefer to move on without bringing up the bad experience. Be reasonable and don’t get hung up on sorting things out. Understand that your partner does not like to play these games.
Riddle 4: HE doesn't tell anything about himself
Girls believe that they have the right to know everything about their loved one. And this is justified: after all, you are trying to become family to each other, why hide something from each other? But not all guys think the same way.
Your boyfriend may pass over some episodes of his past in silence, change the subject when you ask him questions about his life. An inner voice tells you that he wants to hide something from you. And this is the correct answer. However, what is important here is why he is trying to hide something. Most likely, he does this not because he doesn’t trust you, but because he wants to look better in your eyes. Or he’s afraid of hurting you with his memories. Or maybe there were tragic moments in his past, and you touched a nerve with your question. Remember: complete frankness is not always a sign of true love. Everyone should have personal space, including their own little secrets and inner mystery. Everything you really need to know about him, you will find out in due time , so you shouldn’t put pressure on him and rush things: if he wants, he’ll tell you himself.
Powerful woman
There is another explanation why a young man may begin to distance himself and avoid communicating with the woman he likes. Take a closer look at yourself. Perhaps you are too self-sufficient, domineering and strong? Having gotten to know you better, the man simply realized that he would never reach your level, so he began to avoid meetings, then conversations, in order to finally break off the relationship.
If this is the man you want, try to change. Let him feel your weakness, not your power.
Riddle 5: HE suddenly disappears
Let's say that everything is fine in your relationship, you have become one, you were thinking about living together, when suddenly... he suddenly disappeared. He doesn’t pick up the phone, doesn’t respond to SMS, doesn’t get in touch in any way. Or, if you managed to get through, he breathes into the phone for a long time and says that he cannot meet yet.
The situation is not easy, a lot of things could really fall on him, which you obviously have a hard time believing. Perhaps your intuition does not let you down, because he could be scared of the long-term prospects of your relationship, and the thought settled in his head that his youth is passing, and he has not yet worked up. Most likely, in such a situation, he cannot find a place for himself, because he feels guilty in front of you for his actions and all these thoughts, and he is afraid to meet you, to look you in the eyes. These are the tricks the male psyche sometimes produces. In such matters it is very difficult to predict the outcome: whether he will return to you or not.
Perhaps you yourself will need to reconsider your vision of your relationship . Maybe you want too much from your loved one at this stage and put too much pressure on him. But for some reason he is not yet ready to force things. You need to “let go of the reins,” but try to stay in touch with him, try to understand him, show tact and attention. It would be best to give the guy the opportunity to make a decision himself , letting him know that you will be happy to build a further relationship with him. In this case, the chances that you will be able to return everything will increase significantly. And only later, when your communication becomes stable, you can try together to figure out what scared him so much and how to overcome it.
Psychology and reasons
Can a person ignore a lover on purpose? To a greater extent, this behavior is typical of men and is due to a number of reasons:
- His heart is not free. Women often mistake simple displays of gallantry and good manners for courtship. And even if a man offered his hand when exiting the vehicle and let him pass ahead at the entrance to the office, this does not prevent him from being an exemplary family man who loves his wife immensely. And realizing that the woman then begins to build illusions and flirt, hoping for reciprocity, the man radically changes his behavior so as not to deceive her expectations.
- He is not ready for a serious relationship. As long as there was only a light affair with a romantic overtone between you, he was fine with everything. But as soon as he began to notice unambiguous hints about the development of a more serious relationship, he immediately changed and began to avoid you. Such behavior arises because he is afraid of not being able to resist the onslaught from a woman, or simply does not want to traumatize her with a sharp refusal and inspire empty hopes.
- He is afraid of being rejected. Unsuccessful experience in past relationships, innate shyness and timidity are what force a man in love to avoid any contact with his chosen one in every possible way.
- His feelings cooled. Even if just recently everyone considered you a wonderful time and predicted a long family life, at one fine moment a man may realize that next to him is not the woman with whom he would like to connect his destiny. “Ignore” in this situation is just a way to end a relationship that has reached a dead end.
- He lost interest. This happens to those ladies who “And a galloping horse... and into a burning hut...”. Excessive initiative and assertiveness of a woman leads to the fact that a man ceases to feel like a “hunter”, becomes inert and instantly loses the fuse that pushes him to new victories and achievements.
- He has his own strategy of behavior. It is quite possible that by moving closer and further away, a man pursues a specific goal: to intrigue a woman, to make her fall in love with him, and even, in some way, to bind her.
- He is traumatized by his past relationships. A painful breakup or an unsuccessful relationship in the recent past can lead to the fact that a man is simply afraid of a new feeling and tries in every possible way to “stop” its development.
Why does a man begin to ignore a woman when there is mutual sympathy?
A man often lacks just one small step: approach his chosen one, say a few words, after which the romantic story will continue. But he either does not understand this or cannot cope with himself, and therefore does not take action. A girl who watches a young man will notice the shyness that he carefully hides. Here you need to show your imagination and try to help the man get out of the impasse. A woman can act as a voluntary assistant in a situation that he himself cannot do. The result will not be long in coming; the girl will soon understand that she behaved correctly in this situation, so she will receive gratitude and see special warmth from the guy.
It happens that a man values his freedom too much. A sense of personal independence makes him wary of persistent female attention, since he sees a threat to freedom, this is also one of the reasons why a man is not ready to get married.
Riddle 6: HE constantly makes comments
Your relationship is ideal, but suddenly he changed dramatically: he began to constantly snap, something constantly doesn’t suit him about you, either the clothes are wrong, or your manners are bad, or you did something wrong.
You shouldn’t immediately think that he is dissatisfied with your relationship and with you personally. Most likely, he still loves you, but he feels that he is slowly starting to dissolve in you. In other words, he’s a little tired of the relationship and the fact that you’re around so often. Men value a sense of freedom much more than women . It is this that allows the strong half of the planet to create something new, create, do things - in general, move and change this world. You will have to accept this masculine quality and this need of your lover if you want him to continue to feel like a man next to you and do masculine things for you. You need to force yourself to part ways at least sometimes in order to have time to miss each other. It’s better for you to take a little break from each other : take a short break in the relationship, because nothing will strengthen your relationship (if it still exists) like a joyful meeting after a long separation.
Reasons for fears of the girl you like
Even if he meets the ideal option, a guy may give up, especially if he notices the following characteristics in a woman:
- Success. Next to a strong girl, a man can feel incompetent and weak. There are many examples around where successful and wealthy ladies live alone.
- Independence. This property overlaps with the first point, but concerns not only economic well-being. If a woman is able to independently perform male duties (screw in a light bulb, fix plumbing, carry bags from the store, raise a child), then the gentleman will feel useless.
- Stubbornness. It is important for a man to feel the strength of his opinion. When it is infringed upon or regularly questioned, a guy may not be able to withstand such severity and pickiness.
- Security. A man strives to protect his chosen one, expecting to see her tender and fragile. When a girl herself is used to achieving everything in life, then the need for guardianship disappears.
How to avoid being ignored by a man
Often girls are the culprits of such male behavior. To avoid such a situation, you must remember the following rules:
- You should always be open and honest with your partner.
- You should not show your chosen one the negative sides of your character.
- Try to avoid scandals, quarrels, misunderstandings in relationships, because this will further aggravate the situation.
If a relationship is built on love and mutual understanding, there is no room for neglect. Try to understand the feelings and desires of your chosen one in order to make your life together cloudless.
He copies your gestures and mimics you
A man in love with you will imitate your gestures, movements and postures. This way he can feel closer to you even though your relationship is not deep yet.
Mimicry can be conscious or unconscious. If you watch older married couples on the street, you will see that they are usually perfectly in sync.
This behavior helps establish rapport. A person may do this on purpose to let you know that he is attracted to you. To test this, during a long conversation, change your position and watch the man for a few seconds.
A man can copy not only your movements. He may start wearing the same colors that you prefer, or wear a similar bracelet, etc.
He may also start using the same words or expressions that you often use, or make similar gestures. This is how he subconsciously signals that he is in love with you.
How to make peace after a quarrel
The situations described above were when a couple either has not yet formed, or in general they do not have problems as such, but only issues with personal space. But what if your significant other turns on ignore after a quarrel?
If you want to smooth out an unpleasant state after a quarrel, then do not rush to talk and apologize. Let your opponent cool down, calm down, and comprehend what happened. Otherwise, you can run into rudeness and a continuation of the scandal.
After waiting for some time, try to talk calmly, carefully choosing your words, get into a position, demonstrate understanding. Choose your time to communicate wisely. Don’t leave out text messages in the middle of the workday, and if you do write, do it once and wait patiently for an answer.
Don’t let them ignore you, tell them that this is unpleasant and you don’t need to behave like that with a loved one.
Try to be offended to a minimum, and never demonstrate indifference in response. Think not only about your own feelings, but also about your other half. If a person does not make contact, continuing to ignore all efforts on your part, then it is worth raising the question of the advisability of continuing such a relationship.
What is ignoring
Ignoring is, unfortunately, one of the most common methods of psychological protection from any circumstances or from any person; it is the deliberate manipulation of another person through silence, inattention, neglect or other methods.
Recently, ignoring has become one of the most common reasons why couples are forced to consult a psychologist. Most often, women come to this problem when they begin to feel that a man has begun to move away from them. However, ignoring occurs not only in married couples who have been living together for some time, but also at other stages.
He looks at you intently and seeks eye contact.
Making eye contact is the first way a man shows that he likes a woman. This behavior was practiced by cavemen.
Experts explain that eye contact helps people remember you better. Therefore, when a man wants to make a good and lasting impression on a woman, he will try to hold her gaze. A gaze combined with a charming smile can push a woman to a positive answer.
Experts also note that men develop strong feelings for a woman they look at for at least 10 seconds. So “love at first sight” is not the fantasy of writers.
Eye contact is a powerful way for a man to show a woman that he is attracted to her. But this is only the first step for a closer acquaintance.