Why a guy doesn't respond to messages: the main reasons, what to do and how to behave

In this article we will tell you:

1. 10 reasons why a man doesn’t respond to SMS
2. 7 tips from a psychologist on what to do if a man doesn’t respond to SMS
3. SMS options for a man to respond

When communicating, situations sometimes arise when a man, for no apparent reason, begins to ignore you. Perhaps this does not happen suddenly, but over a period of time. Of course, you are asking a logical question about the reasons for this behavior. Or you just become curious why a man doesn’t respond to SMS. Especially if you write to him, and he, being online, either does not read the messages at all, or reads them, but does not react to them in any way. Looks strange.

The very first thing you need to understand is that women and men have different views on communication. If the former think that the answer is a manifestation of interest, then the latter do not attach any importance to the correspondence. Understanding the psychology of representatives of the stronger sex is not as difficult as it seems. And then the reasons for their silence will become obvious to you.

What does it mean if a guy doesn't respond to messages: 5 reasons

Reading a message and sending a response takes a couple of minutes; you can find them even in the super busy schedule of a hero saving the world:

1. Lack of time. The banal truth. A working man does not always have the opportunity to speak or immediately respond to a letter received, especially if the message implies a lengthy, detailed answer. His thinking is of a tunnel type; at the moment when his head is busy with the task of raising indicators to the level required by his superiors, thoughts about the upcoming weekend are firmly blocked. The lover of a dedicated workaholic will have to come to terms with the fact that loving moments during work hours lose priority.
2. Manipulation. Gaming is no longer a woman's preserve; narcissists, abusers and other nasty types you should stay away from are deliberately creating a pendulum effect. At first there is normal communication, then the guy stops writing or answering messages, the girl gets angry, nervous, starts calling, again she is ignored or has a weak, inarticulate reaction. Then everything suddenly becomes good, it’s clear, communication improves. By allowing herself to be drawn into such a game, the lady automatically loses, taking the position of a subordinate. Gradually, cat and mouse become more interesting for the manipulator and sadder for the “victim”. Having noticed such a swing, it is right to say goodbye on the stratum, preserving your personal mental health. Loving a manipulator is the shortest path to neurosis, the murder of self-esteem.
3. Indifference . Lack of interest in a woman is a good reason for a man to remain silent in response. The lady is simply not the focus of attention. Perhaps a man will take the initiative (write, call) when He needs it, boredom sets in.
4. What exactly did you mean? Without understanding the meaning of the message, the person “freezes”, thinking about the message or response options that allow him not to look stupid, revealing a lack of ingenuity. Relevant for complex topics when you need to comprehend an answer expressing a position on a “slippery” issue.
5. Secret love. A man who hides his married status periodically disappears from communication. During working hours, communication occurs without a hitch, but in the evenings and on weekends it becomes problematic to quickly respond to messages; you can’t run to the toilet for half an hour at the first signal in the messenger. The wife will quickly figure out the reasons for the “diarrhea” against the backdrop of changes in the family and the behavior of the husband. The gentleman will clearly explain the delays, but by putting the value “married” instead of the X, it will become clear that these are excuses.

A man does not respond to SMS: further behavior 12+

Often it is the man who initiates such silence. A woman quickly gets used to regular SMS with wishes for a dear morning or good night. Having sent the message again, she may not receive anything in response. How to behave in such a situation?

1. Firstly, do not panic ahead of time. Perhaps your boyfriend simply ran out of money on his phone or has not yet seen the message. If you receive a delivery report, then you need to wait a while, and not start writing endless SMS to it. Such obsessive behavior will push the man away and his desire to respond to you will disappear completely. Think about the fact that during working hours it is quite difficult for him to concentrate on two actions at the same time. This is the essence of male psychology. The reason why you don’t receive a response to an SMS could be because you’re simply busy at work.

2. Secondly, if you are an emotional person, then calling immediately and sorting things out will not be the best way out of this situation. Men do not tolerate hysterical women, so you will only worsen his attitude towards you. It is better to wait for the meeting and find out everything frankly and calmly. But such a conversation is possible only if there are deep and sincere feelings for each other. At the same time, do not be afraid to take the first step that will contribute to the correct construction of further relationships. Analyze your behavior the day before, as a woman can easily offend and quickly forget about it. Perhaps your man harbors a grudge and therefore does not respond to SMS. He can also check in this way how serious you are about him.

Reasons for the pause

If the silence lasts for several days: this is an alarming sign. Obviously, the man decided to take a break from the relationship or break up completely. The first option is less harmful for you, since in such a situation it is worth giving the opportunity to think . After some time, he will definitely call and explain his behavior if he really has serious intentions. A woman is prone to making quick emotional decisions, but for a man the opposite is often true. He needs twice as much time in order to adequately assess the situation and make a final decision.

You will intuitively feel if a man decided to end the relationship in such an unpleasant way as ignoring him. In this case, you should not be upset or worried , since this is unworthy behavior for a real man. Draw objective conclusions from the current situation.

The periodic repetition of abrupt termination of relationships with many men may indicate that the problem is in your character. First, try to absolutely rationally analyze your behavior at different stages of the relationship.
It will be useful to consult with relatives and close people, as they will be able to help with irreplaceable advice. If you think that the reason for the silence is not in you, feel free to delete such a man from your life. Don't let him disrespect you.

How to behave if a man does not answer SMS and calls

A woman, noticing the lack of response messages and calls, begins to get nervous, inventing terrible cases, trying to explain the silence. The ladies, who are prone to panic, are sure that the gentleman lost his phone, ended up in the hospital, died a brave death on the battlefield, and was urgently sent into space.

By overthinking herself, she forgets that men are savvy and purposeful when they really need it. Of course, one case in a million may indeed be an incredible coincidence of circumstances in which there is no way to contact, in the remaining 999,999 there is a backup option to send a message.

Having noticed that the second or third message remains unattended, you need to stop bombing and take a break. Before doing this, you should ask something like: “Are you okay? I’m worried” or “Please call (text) me when you are free.” That's it, the ball is in his court, we exhale and go about our business.

For especially sensitive natures, it is permissible to inquire about the life and health of the object of interest from mutual acquaintances, colleagues, and look up the time of the last visit on social networks.

What to do?

The very first thing you need to do when sending a man an SMS is to be patient. There is no need to look at your phone every five seconds, and if you don’t receive an answer a few minutes later, send him a follow-up “Why don’t you write?” If he doesn’t write, then, as we figured out, there are always reasons for this. Yes, not always pleasant. But quite objective.

In order not to get on the nerves of either yourself or your boyfriend, always write to the point, especially during working hours. Because if a man is really busy, then your messages about anything can bother him, distract him and even make him angry.

It also happens that a man, through his silence, wants to let you know that your relationship is over. Humiliating and unpleasant, I agree. But if this is so, breathe a sigh of relief - such a coward and loser has no place next to you.

What to do if a guy doesn't respond to messages

A young man interested in a girl will be able to find a way to warn his chosen one about the lack of communication, clearly, honestly, understandably explain the reason for the inability to answer messages, calls, and will announce the time frame for resuming communication. The worst thing a young lady can do in case of silence is to start firing machine-gun bursts of messages, expressing resentment, threatening heavenly punishments, and starting a one-sided scandal over correspondence.

You shouldn’t sit cuddling with your cell phone, waiting for news. It’s better to remember how many interesting, important things, meetings, events you can organize in your free time. This will allow you to be distracted and dispel gloomy thoughts. When a subscriber appears on the line, it is advisable to refrain from immediately expressing grievances, claims, or indignations.

His reaction and explanations can tell an attentive, self-possessed girl a lot. Perhaps the guy really experienced force majeure. Or does he not consider it necessary to comment on the action? Throws accusations onto her side, accusing the lady that she herself provoked him to go to the bottom? Time to draw conclusions.

Why doesn't he write?

STOP! Don’t rush with your meaningful “Everything is clear.” Believe me, everything is much simpler than you used to think. And not everything is as scary as you sometimes think. Here are some reasons.

• He's really busy. I understand that you want an answer immediately. But the circumstances may be different - he’s stuck at work, important negotiations, or he’s solving some problems for friends or relatives. He really can’t drop everything and rush to answer you immediately after reading a simple “Hello, how are you?” It is likely that he postponed the answer to a more suitable time for him.

• He is married. Yes, it’s unpleasant, but this happens if you meet and he hides his marital status. And he simply cannot answer you at this moment, because he is at home, with his wife. Therefore, try to find out on the shore whether he has someone or is free.

• He ignores you. An elementary consequence of the fact that when you met, you didn’t hook him. Think about whether you need a man who is not interested in you, but writes to you and meets only when it is convenient for him or to pass the time.

• He doesn't know what to answer. It happens that you girls write with some hints. But we, men, have a very specific mindset; we don’t like and don’t want to read between the lines. Therefore, it often happens that we do not know what to answer, since we cannot immediately decipher your messages. This delays the response time.

• He thinks about the answer. If a man is not indifferent to you, then he will not respond “fuck off.” Sometimes, we really need to think about what and how to respond and carefully go over it in our heads. And this also takes some time.

• He's playing with you. Remember, “The less we love a woman...”? There are men who do not answer for a long time in order to show that they are needed, they test your strength, and artificially tie you to themselves. And then your patience can no longer stand it, and you start calling him. And then that's it, he won. His manipulation worked.

What could be the reasons for men’s silence on SMS?

You should not immediately “cut in the shoulder” with your suspicions and mistrust. Try to figure out the reasons first, and rest assured, there will be reasons.

Trivial connection problems

Sometimes there may be simple reasons:

• technical: the battery is dead, accidentally damaged, water gets in, etc.;
• no access to the network: out of town, on a business trip to a remote area, etc.;
• lack of phone: left in the car, was lost or stolen, had to be given to someone for a while.

Basic employment

A lot of work that requires constant concentration: I didn’t hear the call, for certain reasons I couldn’t answer.

Important matters: partner meeting, business meeting.

Corporate ethics: during working hours, mobile phones are kept in a designated place.

Relaxation with friends and family.

Other reasons

• The notorious male forgetfulness is to blame: I didn’t answer right away due to being busy, and then it slipped my mind. Do not be nervous! For men this is almost the norm.
• Not in the mood for communication: problems in the professional sphere, quarreled with loved ones, got sick or simply got on the wrong foot. Be patient and let him figure out the problems himself.
• He answers in the same coin: sometimes girls themselves set a negative example, and then get angry when guys show them how difficult it is to withstand the long silence of their loved one.
• The lady’s excessive intrusiveness: on his part, this is just friendship, and the woman believes that “romance” has developed between them. Then the man makes it clear to her that he does not want the love story to develop further.
• The chosen one is bound by marriage, and the beloved does not even suspect it. Perhaps it is inconvenient for him to answer, because his wife or children are nearby, or maybe he is visiting his mother-in-law. The lies will stop as soon as you know the truth.

• They ignore you and consider you a “toy.” Such dishonesty leads to the frequent “disappearance” of a man. The signal will be meetings solely at his request.
• It operates on the principle of a swing: push away and without effort you will gain an advantage for further manipulation of the victim’s consciousness, keeping it, as they say, on a short leash.
• The meaning of the message is not clear: women’s logic sometimes defies any explanation. But the man is used to specifics, that’s why he remains silent.
• He was offended because in a recent quarrel you unwittingly offended him with something. For a woman, this fact may be insignificant, but for a man it made an “indelible” impression.
• He takes a pause, or maybe prepares to break off the relationship: the emotional background of the male half of humanity is fundamentally different from the female half. And yet, it is better to discuss your decision with the girl, and not torment her vulnerable soul with the unknown. Better be patient. Respect your partner's choice.

And, of course, it is very unpleasant to receive a break signal in this way. Dont be upset! Let this remain on his conscience.

Why doesn't a man call first, but always answers?

It’s so easy to pick up the phone and, through simple manipulations, dial a number in order to hear your native or not so familiar voice. Then why do men say “call” instead of calling themselves? Why do some male individuals respond to calls almost instantly, but never call first, so as not to disturb the girl’s peace? Is it really so important who dials those ill-fated digits of a phone number first?! When a young lady misses communicating with her friend, she doesn’t hesitate to dial her number. So why do women have doubts when it comes to the opposite sex? All this is because this particular gentleman is a stranger to the girl. Their relationship is still at the stage of acquaintance or first meetings. After all, the wife never has any doubt whether to call her husband first today or wait until he remembers that his other half is waiting for news from him. The exception is the situation of temporary confrontation, which arose, for example, on the occasion of the disappearance of a pair of socks after washing. Here, married ladies are tormented by questions of a slightly different kind: why the man doesn’t call first after a quarrel.

So, why do beautiful women doubt the need to take the first step? First of all, because to this day it is considered wrong to call your first stronger half. Most ladies, brought up on heroic novels, are accustomed to waiting for initiative from men. However, one should not miss that the age of knightly valor is long gone. Modern gentlemen are rather inert and expect the initiative from girls. This happens because supply exceeds demand. After all, many young beauties have completely forgotten about dignity. Today girls are easily accessible and quite intrusive. One won't call, but others will. Therefore, there is no point in men straining themselves. However, if the girl really hooked him and really liked him, then he will always find an opportunity and set aside time for a telephone chat with his passion. A girl who has won a guy’s heart will not hear from him the phrase: “Well, if you need anything, call me.” This is the explanation why men say “call”?

There is also a separate category of males, which includes males who prefer to respond to calls rather than be the first to give news. This could be a character trait, an established habit, or a unique quirk.

It doesn’t matter what reason prompted the interested young individual not to attempt to communicate. It is important to behave with dignity. You need to love your own personality and not allow so-called males to play with your feelings.

The guy is trying to manipulate you to tie you to him

There is a small category of guys who, in fact, in order to get attention, create the feeling that you are interesting to him, but at the same time he has a lot of other things to do and exciting meetings. This is done so that the girl does not get the feeling that he is at her feet. They also use this method to immediately lower the girl’s standards. They believe that if you are interested in a guy, then you yourself will start looking for meetings with him or at least try to remind him of yourself.

But that rarely happens. This method is less common for guys, but it is quite possible.