Ex-husband wants to come back: what to do and how to behave

During the process of divorce, a man and a woman, as a rule, ask questions: why is this happening, where did they take the wrong step, where did the trust go, why did the partner betray. After a breakup, a difficult stage in life begins, which is associated with adaptation to new conditions and the organization of one’s personal life. But it happens that you are faced with a choice whether you need to enter the same river twice. Is it good? How to behave and not repeat past mistakes if your ex-husband wants to return?
From this article you will learn:

• What are the signs that your ex-husband wants to come back?
• What to do if your ex-husband wants to come back
• What to do if your ex-wife wants to return to her husband
• Why do you dream of an ex-husband who wants to come back?

Signs your ex wants to get back together

There are several basic clues that will make it clear that your lover wants to return. But one of the most important things that you need to keep in mind and answer honestly is how positive the relationship was. If you are sure that they were positive and you parted very stupidly, then most likely your loved one will return.

Below is a list of signs that will indicate that your ex-boyfriend still loves you and wants to get back together. So, 12 signs:

• after several months of silence, he wrote you one or two messages;
• you broke up because of the distance between you. Perhaps you had to move to another city or leave for certain reasons. But if you really have feelings, then distance will not be a problem and you will be able to reunite;
• his relatives called you and said that the faithful misses you;
• a handwritten letter of love came from him;
• your chosen one has not removed you from friends on social networks;
• the separation passed calmly, without quarrels and mutual insults;
• it is possible that the lover had too many problems, so he needed to focus on solving them. So, most likely, he will want to return;
• he is jealous of you, so he cannot allow you to date someone else;
• mutual acquaintances and friends tell you what he remembers about you;
• your ex-boyfriend is trying to meet you by any means;
• leaves statuses on social networks that confirm that he misses you;
• your beloved gets nervous and angry when he sees you next to another representative of the stronger sex.

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Sign No. 2 – he involves mutual friends

Even if spouses separate, they still have common acquaintances: friends, relatives, colleagues. Often an ex-boyfriend or husband uses them to convey messages. He asks them to tell you that he wants to return and give gifts: flowers, sweets, jewelry.

Psychology calls such mutual acquaintances who force you to return to your husband “flying monkeys.” This is a reference to the fairy tale "The Wizard of Oz", where the witch ordered her servants, the flying monkeys, to deliver the main characters to her.

How to behave if your ex wants to come back?

If you still love this man and have been waiting for him to return, in this case you need to accept his apology and get back together. Talk to him about your breakup and the conclusions you have drawn from past failures so that the relationship becomes stronger and more harmonious.

But if you are sure that you no longer need to have any communication with him, then do not make contact and try not to meet him anywhere. Move on with your life. In addition, you need to know that your ex wants to get back into the relationship for a number of reasons, which include:

• he feels guilty towards you;
• wants to ask for forgiveness in order to remain friends;
• wants to give the relationship another chance;
• just wants to know how you live, without changing anything;
• he wants to know if he can manipulate you again;
• There are only failures in his life, he needs money, so he wants to make peace.

Psychologist's advice

1. You need to understand that your current life together will be different from the previous way of life . But if you don’t agree on some points, you won’t be able to let go of the negative. Spouses need to understand how they will resolve disputes, whether they are able to change their views and forget about the past.
2. We need to build new relationships together. If only one side puts in the effort, nothing will come of it.
3. When agreeing to take a man back, you should not remember his mistakes . Expecting constant apologies can turn into a scandal.

Why does your ex want to come back?

Every man who wants to reunite with his former passion has certain goals. Psychologists identify several main reasons that encourage exes to return:

1. He realizes that he made a mistake. Sometimes people make rash decisions, driven by emotions, and then regret their actions. Representatives of the stronger sex with high moral qualities most often return to ex-girlfriends. They believe that the chosen one will have a difficult time without him, and her life will become worse.
2. He was tired of loneliness. Having been a bachelor, the guy notes that delicious food does not appear on the table, the house is not cleaned on its own, and shirts are not washed or ironed. Being lonely, a man is forced to solve all everyday problems on his own. If the couple shared all expenses in half, then the desire to return may be due to commercialism.
3. Disappointment in other women. Some men are accustomed to seeing certain qualities in their life partner that they expect from new passions. However, not every woman wants to be a cook, mistress and cleaner all rolled into one. As a result, a person begins to suffer from a lack of attention and care. Therefore, guys often express a desire to return to their former passions.

1. A sense of ownership. In such a situation, even after breaking up, they continue to monitor the lives of their exes, because they do not want to put up with the loss of power. Realizing that the girl in whom he invested his time and resources may end up in the arms of another, the man returns.
2. If he quit on his own. Men rarely return to women they leave themselves. But if the girl who initiated the breakup beckons, then in almost all cases they return, despite the fact that they may have a new relationship.

1. We have common children. Many women wonder whether their ex-husband will return. If they have children, then this is a common story of husbands returning to their wives. However, without feelings for a woman, children cannot always become a decisive factor in the return of a spouse to the family.
2. Emotional pressure. There is a category of girls who can achieve anything they want with their tears. They begin to put moral pressure on their boyfriend, acting through his friends, relatives and acquaintances.
3. He managed to compare. The young man sees some shortcomings in his chosen one, and therefore decides to break up with her. But having started a relationship with another girl, he becomes convinced that his previous passion was much better. However, this does not always mean that the relationship can end with a happy ending. If on his life's path he meets a girl who meets his ideals, he will go to her.
4. Real love. It’s hard for people together, but bad for people apart. And the lovers once again quarreled and decided to separate. They start a new relationship, but at one point they break off all ties with new passions and return to their exes. This can only be explained by true love.

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How to speed up the reunification of spouses?

To quickly restore relationships, a special attitude is important, namely:

• try to forget everything;
• let it hurt, but forgive;
• understand yourself and get rid of uncontrollable complexes of anger, indignation and other unpleasant emotions;
• prepare for change. For reunification, a different personality is needed;
• follow the rule: the more deeply and gracefully a woman changes, the faster her husband will be drawn to her;
• maximize self-esteem, supported by regular physical exercise in the gym or at home;
• become really attractive. Every woman knows how to do this; she just has to want it.

The algorithm for accelerating the psychological impact on the ex-spouse may be as follows:

• call and schedule a business meeting, preferably in a week, in a cafe or restaurant, warning that everyone pays for themselves;
• call back in a few days. Reschedule the meeting for the next day in the evening and only for half an hour no more;
• be at least five minutes late and come in a new tight outfit with charming makeup and a good hairstyle;
• greet. Report some far-fetched decision and the need to never meet again. Smile. Kiss me on the cheek and leave. The decision depends on your own imagination, where the environment serves as a resource.

The order of the actions themselves is small, but quite effective. The proposed algorithm in 95% of cases guarantees the awakening of the ex-spouse’s powerful interest in his abandoned wife and the generation of his early desire to return home.

Don't rush to accept your ex-boyfriend

In any case, the ex will make attempts to restore the relationship. They usually do this via SMS, calls or messages on social networks. If he calls or writes, try not to show your feelings, get offended or throw a tantrum. Since the decision was not easy for the beloved and it took him a lot of courage to contact you.

Therefore, be calm and try to communicate positively. Do not remember the past and mistakes of your loved one. You should have done this during the separation period. And if you rub his nose into his unsuccessful past again, you will only indicate to him that you do not believe in his sincere desire to make peace.

Sign #6 – He shows (or pretends to) care.

He constantly calls to ask how you are doing. Shows that he still cares and cares about your health and mood. If he knows your bank card number, he will send you money regularly. If you suddenly get sick, he becomes the most caring nurse and brings you medicine and honey in jars.

If you don’t mind making contact with him, perceive him as a friend and share your problems and concerns with him, he listens carefully and asks questions. So before you know it, you discover his active participation in all areas of your life.

Why your ex will never come back

And although you want to believe that your ex-lover will someday return, this is not always the case. If he does something from the list, then most likely he will never return:

• the man stops any communication with you, does not call or write;
• blacklists on social networks;
• starts an affair with another woman;
• speaks poorly of you among friends and tells how you ruined his life;
• you parted hard, it’s likely that one of you cheated.

Sign #3 – He is abusing your common cause.

If the spouses were engaged in a common business before the divorce, then they are forced to continue meeting, this time on work issues. In business negotiations, your ex may abruptly change the subject and bring up past events.

Common children are also at risk. According to the law, the ex-wife has no right to prevent the children from communicating with their father, who uses them as puppets. Makes them persuade you to return, makes them part of your conspiracy, turns them against you.

What does a woman need to do to get her ex back?

A young lady who has broken up with her lover and wants to return him should not provoke scandals. Psychologists recommend adhering to the following tips:

• do not write angry messages;
• do not pester your loved one with endless calls;
• do not push for pity;
• avoid discussing relationships during a chance meeting with your loved one;
• show that you are independent and positive;
• Organize a date yourself if your spouse does not offer it;
• think over your image, the main thing is that it is natural.

Take the test and find out what your chances are of getting your husband back

What to do next?

By this point, you should have already understood whether the ex-boyfriend wants to return, at least in general terms.

In fact, this knowledge is a double-edged knife. On the one hand, if you doubt whether he still has feelings, then you cannot start a new relationship. On the other hand, if you know 100% that he misses you, you will want to speed up the process of getting back together as much as possible. What, as mentioned above, cannot be done.

We have dealt with the first case, but what should we do with the second? How to behave correctly?

The secret here is to keep your emotions in check.

If you want him back, the only thing you need to do is not make contact and keep your distance.

Lack of contact reinforces what the partner already has. If he is truly bored, then some constant lack of communication will fan the spark into a real flame. Depriving attention, the ex will need it more and more. The moment you finally get in touch, these feelings will overwhelm him.

Here are the recommendations:

• Don't be the first to contact. Let the ex do it himself, especially if the initiative to break up came from his side. Do not rush to call or write if very little time has passed. Let him think about what happened.
• No sex together if it continues after the breakup. This behavior may cause problems in the future.
• Don't write to him more often than he does.

The main rule is to keep a little distance all the time. Let him take the initiative himself.

Why men come back after a breakup - men's opinion

Initially, it all comes down to the fact that they are interested in how his former passion lives. And if there is nothing interesting in her life, then he may not appear in her life soon.

And if her personal life has improved or career growth has occurred, this arouses interest and indignation at the same time that he did not become a participant in such cardinal events in her life.

If a couple has children, then the man considers it normal to appear regularly in the life of his ex. Sometimes such appearances can cross boundaries when he expresses a desire to stay overnight or asks to borrow money. Some even consider themselves entitled to kick out their ex’s new boyfriend, citing the fact that he is the father. On a subconscious level, they try to protect their offspring from the influence of another man.

Sometimes gentlemen decide to return because he does not want to start a new relationship and pursue another woman. With the ex, everything is simple, he knows all the approaches to her. In addition, some spiritual closeness pushes men to write or call their ex-lover when difficult life situations occur.

Should I take it back?

Reviving a marriage is always a difficult process. Most often, the reason for the breakup was the man’s misconduct. When the ex-husband wants to go back, the wife faces a serious choice. Let's speculate.

For example, a couple reunited.
At first everything goes perfectly. But suddenly an event occurs that caused the breakup. Maybe the breakup was due to male infidelity. And now betrayals are happening again. In such conditions, a new separation is inevitable, only this time it will be much more difficult to survive.
Most likely, the woman does not want to experience torment again. Therefore, before agreeing to revive the union, you need to figure out why the partner wants to return.

Important ! It is necessary to categorically refuse a man to return if the feelings have not yet subsided, the woman experiences aggression and hatred towards her former half. You also cannot agree to a new relationship if the spouse intends to repay her partner in the same coin.

How does a man feel after a breakup?

For women who are used to taking decisive action, it is difficult to understand why men often return after a breakup. Male psychology has certain characteristics. The guys who initiated the breakup are relieved.

Tired of endless scandals and misunderstandings, a person wants to be left alone. If there were no good reasons for the separation, the man may soon feel devastated and regret what happened.

As a rule, a man’s pride does not allow him to express emotions openly, which does not have the best effect on his nervous system. To suppress his mental suffering, a person can do the following:

1. He goes on a drinking binge. Often, after a breakup, men begin to abuse alcohol. This behavior can have negative consequences. But most often, after some time, the man is forgotten and returns to his previous life.
2. Immerses himself in his work. Parting with your beloved can provoke an attack of workaholism. In such a situation, a man devotes all his time to work and tries to avoid any communication with the female sex. Thanks to this, he distracts and increases his self-esteem.
3. He is interested in extreme sports. He learns to fly a hang glider, conquers mountains or takes part in fights without rules. Thus, he tries to avoid depression by releasing adrenaline.
4. Frequently changes sexual partners. By changing his ladies every night like gloves, he asserts himself and emphasizes his own importance.
5. Starts a new romance. Most men are not ready for a new serious relationship immediately after a breakup. But the care of a new lover helps to survive the separation.

Take the test and find out what your chances are of getting your husband back

Drunk calls and messages

There is a good saying: “What a sober man has in his head, a drunk man has on his tongue.” Alcohol has the ability to intensify whatever is being felt at the moment. So if you're upset, drinking is not a good idea.

In this regard, how to understand that your ex misses you can be because he starts writing and calling while drunk. But there are 2 options:

1. He thinks about your relationship and misses you, but is still in a state of pendulum, that is, he doubts whether it is worth renewing the connection.
2. Hopes for a reunion, but doesn't know how to do it.

What to do if your ex doesn't come back?

Breaking up with a loved one is not easy. But no matter what's going on between you right now, stay strong and stay positive. Whatever happens, move on with your life. You may even be grateful to him for leaving you.

Don't worry or wonder if your ex-boyfriend will come back. Better focus on your own life. Many women claim that as soon as they began to live their old lives, it was at that moment that the ex expressed a desire to return.

Now you need to focus on self-love. Don't blame yourself for your emotions, which may overwhelm you. Instead, listen to your heart. At the moment, the best idea would be to take some time for yourself, remember your hobbies, meet with friends and take care of yourself.

To get help and specific recommendations from a professional psychologist, watch this video right now. Click on the screen below:

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How and what is the conversation going on?

It is very important to pay attention and be aware of the pitfalls that will or already occur during conversations. What or how the conversation goes is not necessarily reality; sometimes there is something more hidden behind it.

So, let's look at several options:

1. Neglect. He speaks to you in a dismissive tone, but this does not mean erasing you from your life. The ex tries to keep his distance, making it clear that resumption is impossible. This is 100% true if the desire to separate came from you. If he took such a step, then neglect is not an accurate sign; perhaps he is simply very nervous, and therefore hides behind a mask of arrogance.
2. Talks about himself. Quite selfish, don't you think? But don't rush to conclusions. If he talks about himself, it means he is quite comfortable sharing personal things with you. However, keep in mind that staying as your ex's friend is a bad idea if you want to get him back.
3. Talks about meetings, trips with other people. Most likely, you are already in the friend zone and there is no way to return the relationship. The ex is already moving forward and there is no room for you as a soul mate.
4. Asks about your life. It is likely that he is trying to understand whether you have someone in mind. And he doesn’t like this idea, which means he has doubts about breaking up. He may even ask about it directly.

How to return your husband to your family

Many families experience difficult times in their relationships.
The reasons for this can be completely different. Some families survive this difficult period and remain together, others become completely confused and ultimately separate altogether. Quite often, men leave the family, believing that such a decision is the only right one. But if a woman is not ready to come to terms with this and be left without her beloved husband, then she must fight for her happiness. The reasons for divorce can be very diverse.

It is much easier when the problem is of a domestic nature, or a misunderstanding arises in the family, then a simple conversation may be quite enough to improve relationships and eliminate the cause of the disagreement. It is much more difficult when a rival appears, or when a woman cheats. Then you will need a lot of perseverance and resourcefulness to return the other half to the family.

First steps to return to your husband's family

Quite often it happens that, after expressing all the complaints to the spouse, he packs up his things and leaves the family. Often the first thing a woman experiences is bewilderment, she is simply confused, and sometimes she feels relieved, believing that this will be better for everyone.

But as time passes, the realization of what happened comes, all the shortcomings of the other half do not seem so serious as to destroy the family because of them. Now the more important problem is: what does the spouse think about the separation, and does he have a desire to go back?

The most correct thing in this situation is not to be nervous, but to calmly think about the current situation. First, every woman needs to understand herself and decide how strong her feelings for her husband are and the desire to be with him. If an affirmative answer is received to both questions, and further life without a spouse is simply unthinkable, then it is urgent to begin an operation to return him to the family.

Ways to bring your husband back to the family

The most effective is a frank conversation. It must be remembered that men are reasonable and low-emotional creatures. Consequently, it is simply unacceptable for the dialogue to take place in a raised voice with a vivid display of emotions and an outburst of feelings. You need to calmly and clearly explain your desires to your spouse.

Letting a man talk is also equally important. Don't interrupt him or make comments. If necessary, you can even give in, but in no case should you hurt your husband’s pride. His consent to the conversation should be appreciated, because if this happened, then the probability of bringing the husband back is quite high.

In family matters, you should not listen to the advice of others, even if they are close friends. After all, no one can know the relationship between spouses better than themselves. In such a situation, advice can only do harm. Also, you should not try to return your husband with the help of jealousy: this will not give a positive effect, but it can aggravate the situation.

My husband has a mistress: how to get him back

When attention from your spouse decreases, as well as when you learn that your other half has a mistress, the main thing is to remain calm. And then try to soberly assess the situation: how serious their relationship is, and whether it threatens the marriage.

Some of the first reasons that push a man into adultery are: lack of sex with his wife, a constantly dissatisfied wife and a psychologically difficult atmosphere in the family.

Therefore, in order to prevent a final break, a woman needs to try to eliminate these causes.

First of all, do not make a scandal or quarrel with your husband, be kinder to him, praise and compliment him more often.

It is necessary to look at your relationship from the outside, and also to organize fun activities together more often, such as trips to your husband’s favorite entertainment venues, interesting games and entertainment.

A man must again feel and realize how good and fun he can have time with his wife.

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You can try to discuss this situation without scandals and accusations. A woman must show a man that she is ready to forgive him. Don't break down and show your feelings. The husband will definitely appreciate the ability to control himself and perhaps agree to a second attempt to build a relationship.

Ways to win over your mistress

The situation is much more difficult to resolve when the spouse has already left for a rival. Here you should also try not to give free rein to your emotions. If you have the opportunity to forgive your unfaithful spouse and want to return him to the family, you need to start fighting for your personal happiness. You must try to meet, even if your spouse tries in every possible way to avoid it.

You can come up with a date to discuss any issues that do not relate to your relationship, for example, an issue related to children. The meeting is simply necessary in order to understand whether there is any point in trying to get him back. Looking into his eyes, his mood, feelings and emotions will become clear without words.

And if there is at least a small chance that the spouse can be returned, you should take active action.

First you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself, hating your husband’s mistress and trying to take revenge on her. You need to forget about this situation for a while and take care of your appearance.

An impeccable appearance will certainly awaken faded feelings in a spouse who once met and fell in love with a young, attractive and sexy girl. It's time to become her again, raise her head high, showing everyone around her respect for herself.

Excellent helpers in achieving your goal will be: playing sports, visiting the pool, going to the solarium and visiting a cosmetologist.

Ways to get your husband back using astrology

The stars say that if the husband's zodiac sign is Aquarius, Pisces or Aries, then family reunification largely depends on whose fault the breakup occurred.

If the spouse is at fault, it will be quite difficult, since it will be very difficult for people who were born under these zodiac signs to tolerate next to them a person who has offended them.

Therefore, you will have to make a lot of effort so that feelings flare up with renewed vigor, and resentment fades into the background.

If the reason was the spouse leaving for a rival, then the most effective way would be to make him jealous, since all these people are owners, and they will not be able to calmly accept the fact that their wife might like another man, and also react to the manifestation of sympathy for her on the part of men.

If a man of these signs spontaneously and thoughtlessly leaves the family, after a short period of time you should let them know that you will be simply happy with his return to the family.

This will be a fairly smart move, since it will not cause a blow to the man’s pride, and will also demonstrate the sincerity of this act.

For the homecoming of Capricorn, Taurus and Sagittarius,

it is necessary to awaken in them memories of those times when you were happy. Representatives of these zodiac signs are greatly influenced by the mood that reigns in the house.

You can also bring them to a frank conversation and openly express your feelings. And then don’t remind yourself for a while to give you the opportunity to think about what you heard.

You should not be persistent and intrusive, since men of these signs do not tolerate pressure on themselves at all.

Once they realize that you are ready to accept them, they will calmly return home. After all, communication is very important for them, and it is with the help of it that they can establish contact as quickly as possible.

To renew relationships with Cancer, Libra or Scorpio

you need to catch their eye as often as possible. After all, these zodiac signs are characterized by rapid mood changes. It is not surprising if they change their decision several times about whether to return to the family or not. You can talk with their friends, and in the conversation, as if in passing, say that they would be happy to reunite with their other half.

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvwNrVKIkLU

A certain amount of time will pass, and the husband will return to the family again, since people of these particular signs change their spouse only in extreme cases. The speed of his return will largely depend on the frequency of the wife with reminders of herself, and of those times when the family was happy.

If the husband is Leo,

then most of the conflicts and disagreements occur due to his desire to demonstrate his dominant position. Often, his departure from the family is associated with the same thing, as well as with the desire to achieve submission from his wife. For his return, it is enough to demonstrate that he really is the head of the family, and his wife agrees to obey him in everything.

your Virgo husband openly that you want to be with him again. In any case, in order to return your spouse home, you must try to at least outwardly remain calm; in any situation, remain outwardly attractive, friendly and not making a lot of claims.

If your spouse has left, then you shouldn’t bother him. It is much better to ask about health and success over the phone, thereby demonstrating interest and concern for it.

In the meantime, a calm psychological atmosphere, comfort and peace should reign in the apartment, so that he feels his significance and importance for this house.

Then, most likely, he will have a desire to return here again, or he will not want to leave anywhere at all.

This article was written without a call to action, but only for reflection and is not the ultimate truth.

Source: //lifeshen.biz/blogs/post/921-Kakim-obrazom-vernut-v-semyu-muzha-v-semyu