Many modern people are in constant procrastination mode and are frustrated due to their inability to cope with their laziness. This hits especially hard for those who have a lot of ambitions and very little space to realize them.
If you think that all this is partly about you, now we will tell you how to force yourself to do what you don’t want and finally get off the couch. Don't worry, we won't offer violent solutions to this problem. The methods we have described should help you really want to act and awaken interest in previously unattainable matters.
Focus on the reasons
Instead of quitting things you don't like, stop and think. Why do you need to complete this task and why don’t you want to do it?
You must do it because it is useful: for health, finances, your home or for other people. There is some benefit to what you do, and by doing it you are making the world a better place.
Doing small things is boring and sad, because they have no high meaning. If you know that you are doing a good deed, it is much more interesting.
No matter how small your task may seem - washing dishes, doing laundry, working out at the gym, you are making yourself better. And because you are part of the world, it becomes better too.
How to do something when you don’t want to, but you have to
I really don’t like the expression “force yourself.” In my opinion, you cannot force yourself - you can only come to an agreement with yourself. Well, or deceive - but this is not the best way. So, how do you agree with yourself to do something that you clearly don’t want to do? And it is just as clearly necessary. Some time ago, I read on the blog of psychologist Heidi Halvorson about three simple reasons that prevent us from doing something, and the same (well, almost) simple solutions to these problems. And since time has shown that the solutions (at least for me) are suitable, I hasten to share them. So, why is the deadline approaching, but there is still no solution? Reason #1: You put things off because you're afraid you won't be able to handle them.
Solution: Instead of “achievement fixation,” use “loss prevention fixation.”
Explanation: Every problem can be looked at from two perspectives. It’s usually customary to look at it this way: “I’ll do this and I’ll become better/cooler/richer/healthier.” This is “achievement fixation,” where you anticipate how you will feel better once you achieve something. The problem is that if you are afraid of not being able to cope with a task, there is no point in completing it - you will not achieve anything. If you want, for example, to play sports, but subconsciously imagine the great sporting achievements that lie ahead of you, you are at the same time afraid of not achieving them. Psychological research shows that one of the common reasons for postponing tasks is precisely the fear of not completing it.
But you can look at the task from the other side: what will happen if it is not done? You will probably lose something. If you don't do the work, you'll lose your salary, or maybe a bonus. You don’t have to win a gold medal at the Olympics, but if you don’t play sports at all, you’ll ruin your health. Set yourself up for “loss prevention” and it will be a good motivator.
Of course, it’s not that easy or simple, but it’s better to motivate yourself this way than to worry about what might go wrong and end up doing nothing.
Reason #2: You put off a task because you are “not in the mood.”
Solution: ignore your feelings and moods, they only bother you.
“I just can’t get up early”, “I can’t go to the gym” - such excuses are used too often. But in reality, no one chained you to the bed. There are no bouncers blocking your way before entering the fitness club. There is nothing stopping you physically - you just “don’t have the right mood.” Ok, who said that in order to do something you need to be in the right mood?
Think about it. For some reason, it is believed that to achieve success you must have inspiration or mood. We must be determined to do what needs to be done. Isn't this nonsense? In general, of course, you need to more or less desire something - to become healthier, richer, stronger. But you don’t need to be in the right mood all the time to do this.
All successful people in creative professions - artists, writers (and many programmers also like to consider themselves creative people) - they all achieved success by simply working several hours a day. Regardless of your mood. As Chuck Close (an artist and photographer who continued to work even after being partially paralyzed) said: “Inspiration is for beginners. Everyone else just comes and works.”
So, if you are not in the mood, this is not a reason. Nothing is stopping you.
Reason #3: The task is too difficult, boring or unpleasant.
Solution: plan its execution in advance.
As soon as the time comes to do something very difficult and unpleasant, doubts come. “Maybe I’ll do it next time. Or maybe it's not so necessary. Now there’s something else to do.”
The problem is that if you start thinking about whether to do or not do something when the time has come to do it, you set yourself a double task. And decide to do it, and then do more. And making decisions is a difficult task in itself. You have to use willpower every time - and, as you know, it is not iron.
It is much easier to do planning based on a simple algorithm. “When Saturday comes, I will clean the apartment.” “When I get up in the morning, I immediately do exercises.” “If the boss forgets about my request to increase my salary, I will remind him at the meeting.”
By making decisions in advance, you are already doing part of the work. All that remains, when the right moment comes, is simply to carry out your decision. You’ve already made up your mind – well, there’s no room for doubt.
I would like to add one more trick that I use. Usually a person is too lazy not only to do something, but usually he doesn’t want to change his state or switch to another task. I know that once I start doing something, it's much easier to just continue. Therefore, every time I am faced with an unpleasant task or task, I agree with myself - if I suddenly really don’t want to continue it, I will finish it right away. “I’ll start cleaning the apartment from this room - if something happens, I’ll give it up.” Almost always, as a result, the task is completed - “I’ve already started, why quit halfway.”
Well, finally, I’ll note - if when you wake up in the morning, you are smilingly anticipating what you will do all day, if time flies unnoticed in your work, if you are surprised that only a month has passed, and you have already managed to do so much - congratulations, you are happy Human!
Good luck to you in all your endeavors, and may the willpower be with you.
A little work and then a break
If you are not drawn into the matter right away, you can do differently. For example, you decide to write something. Sit down and write one sentence, then get up and walk around the room for a few minutes. At this time, you will already be thinking about the following sentences. Then sit down, write a paragraph, and pause again.
During a break, do not occupy your mind with anything else, do not go to sites not related to your topic. Instead, do a couple of push-ups, stand on the balcony, or make yourself some tea. Thanks to breaks, you will very quickly find yourself in the flow and will be able to write without interrupting your work.
How to force yourself to do something: popular practices
| Practice | Description |
| Do the cleaning | Your desk or the room in which you are going to do some work should not be cluttered with papers, garbage, or cups. Simple cleaning and putting everything in its place will start the mechanism, and you won’t even notice how the reluctance to work has disappeared. |
| Small matters | Write 3 simple things to do on a piece of paper. For example: call your mom, go to the grocery store, start the laundry. Once you complete this, check the box next to each item. This will immediately improve your mood, and you will be ready to take on more difficult tasks. |
| Important matter | Write down one important thing on a piece of paper. You must complete it immediately. Glue this paper on the most visible place (computer monitor) so that it is always in front of your eyes. Until you finish the task, do not switch your attention to anything else. By the way, a timer will help you in this case. Turn it on for 15 minutes and concentrate on the task at hand. |
| Change your workplace | Take your laptop or work notepad and head it to the nearest coffee shop. Drink tea or coffee, allow yourself a piece of chocolate. Look around, breathe some fresh air. This will cheer you up a little and give you strength to cope with the task that you have been putting off or simply did not want to do. |
| Leave your phone or tablet in a distant room | This technique will help you stay focused on what you're doing without getting distracted by the notification sounds that constantly pop up on your phone. |
As you can see, you don’t have to do anything complicated. It is important to repeat the presented practices as often as possible. This way they will become a habit and become an integral part of your life.
Self-discipline
In order to correct the situation and force yourself to act, you need to trust your spirit. The body wants to smoke and drink, the mind wants to get stuck on social media. networks, only one spirit cares what is happening here and now. And everything must be done to help him pacify these animals.
The spirit grows stronger when a person accepts austerities, goes against his habits and takes on more restrictions and obligations.
If we take my case, it was:
- Quitting alcohol
- Quitting cigarettes (with varying success)
- Sexual abstinence
- Refusal of unconscious use of social media. networks
- Early rise and fall
- Workouts (running and calisthenics)
- Daily meditation for an hour and the desire to live every moment mindfully
- Isolation from the outside world and unnecessary stimuli
- Information diet
Reason: I wait until I feel like it
Synonyms:
- I don't feel like it's time to do this yet
- I'm not in the right mood for this
- I should feel a surge of strength and desire to do this
- I have no motivation, it will appear, then I’ll do it
- I'm too lazy to do this
