Rules of speech communication article on the Russian language on the topic

Speech etiquette is an important part of any community. It helps maintain a balance between the informative and emotional components of communication, making communication understandable and acceptable for representatives of different cultures and social groups. Norms of verbal behavior apply both to everyday life and to the business sphere; they prescribe communication scenarios for special occasions and mournful situations.

The relationship between culture and speech

A cultured person stands out from the crowd with his demeanor, courtesy, awareness and communication skills. Such a person knows how to behave in society, makes contact easily and can carry on a conversation.

The speech of a cultured person is distinguished by semantic accuracy, grammatical correctness, expressiveness, richness and versatility of vocabulary and logical harmony.

Such speech is called standardized - in its oral form it corresponds to the currently existing pronunciation standards, and in written form - to the rules of punctuation and spelling.

The relationship between culture and speech is obvious here. A person who does not have an idea of ​​moral and ethical standards will not be able to observe speech etiquette for the following reasons:

• lack of any education and literacy;
• narrow outlook;
• lack of communication skills;
• an abundance of “weed” words in speech;
• use of profanity.

Important! In some cases, knowledge of etiquette does not guarantee decent communication. Sometimes it is a question of the personal qualities of the interlocutor.

Rules of invitation, offer, request, consent and refusal

When inviting someone to take part in something, you should also follow the rules of speech etiquette. The situations of invitation, offer and request are somewhat similar; in them, the speaker always slightly reduces the status of his role in communication and emphasizes the importance of the interlocutor

A stable expression of invitation is the phrase “we have the honor to invite,” which notes the special importance of the invitee. For invitations, offers and requests, the words “please”, “please”, “please” are used.

In the invitation and proposal, you can additionally say about your feelings towards the invitee: “we will be glad/happy to see you”, “we are pleased to offer you.” A request is a situation in which the speaker deliberately reduces his position in communication, but you should not overdo it; the traditional form of a request is the words: “I ask you,” “could you please.” Consent and refusal require different verbal behavior. If consent can be extremely laconic, then refusal must be accompanied by softening and motivating formulations, for example, “unfortunately, we are forced to refuse your proposal, since at the moment ....”

Formation of a culture of communication

You can communicate in very different ways. Within the walls of a department at a state university and, for example, a public canteen, radically different vocabulary is used, but the rules of speech etiquette are generally the same.

This happens because the formation of a culture of communication begins in infancy. Children in different conditions receive different quality of training in social behavior, but according to the same principles (excluding marginalized groups).

The minimum standards of communication culture include the ability to maintain a verbal distance, refuse insults and discuss shortcomings out loud, and the inadmissibility of rudeness and aggression.

To function successfully in society, a young member of society must learn loyalty and a minimum of respect for others.

Since humanity is no longer in a tribal system, respect and goodwill are expressed through speech and its expressions - intonation, words, gestures.

The formation of a culture of communication begins from an early age. Along with the rules of behavior, the child is also taught the postulates of speech etiquette. Direct and indirect influence on the formation of speech culture is exerted by:

• family;
• entourage;
• educational institution.

A child learns his first communication skills in the family. As soon as he begins to speak, he begins to copy the manner of speech of his household, using the same words and intonations - the child’s speech becomes a reflection of the speech of the parents and their task is to convey to the child the basics of a culture of communication.

In families where a lot of attention is paid to raising children, children from an early age know the “magic words” and their meaning.

At the second stage, others intervene in the process of mastering speech rules:

• neighbours;
• random people on the street;
• friends and their parents.

The child’s social circle becomes wider, new words appear in speech, and the manner of speaking changes. And what she will be like now depends not only on the parents.

If a child spends time among well-mannered, cultured people, it means that his speech will become richer and brighter, but if those around him are unfamiliar with the culture of communication and “litter” with profanity, then the child will certainly take on some turns.

Kindergarten, school and other educational institutions teach reading and writing without spelling and punctuation errors, as well as correctly expressing thoughts orally and in writing.

Moreover, the child receives the necessary knowledge from the lessons of the Russian language and literature, but also from other disciplines. The entire educational process is aimed at developing speech etiquette, and the goal is the following points:

• develop sociability and social activity;
• establish communicative relationships with others;
• improve academic performance
• develop rapid adaptation to a variety of activities.

Internet writing etiquette

In modern society, it is common to share news, meet new people, and get a job via the Internet. There are no specific prescribed standards for talking via email, but there are recommendations that are recommended to be followed:

• do not delay your response - you should respond as soon as you see the message;
• You should not write to the addressee during free time - it is preferable to contact them during working hours or apologize if it is impossible to postpone the question;
• speech must be understandable - be sure to write unambiguously to avoid misunderstandings;
• correct content - the text must be free of spelling, grammatical and punctuation errors;
• You can’t demand an immediate response - you should show respect - the interlocutor may be busy or thinking about a response to the message.

What is speech etiquette?

Speech etiquette is a set of requirements for the content, nature, form, order and appropriateness of statements in a given situation.

Interesting read: Speech etiquette in China.

These are certain rules of speech behavior, a system of specific stereotypical, stable communication formulas that are accepted by society for mutual contact between interlocutors, its maintenance and interruption in the chosen tonality.

Speech etiquette involves the use of certain words and expressions in various situations:

• during greeting;
• at the moment of farewell;
• upon request;
• during treatment;
• at the moment of apology.

The necessary words and phrases are pronounced with a certain intonation, which, together with the sayings, characterizes polite speech.

Mastery of speech culture helps in developing personality, gaining authority, trust and respect. By observing speech etiquette, a person feels confident and at ease in any situation, and also avoids ridicule and awkwardness in an unfamiliar environment.

It is a set of rules that are unique to different races and social groups in some respects. Most of the rules of speech etiquette are considered unspoken and are normally taught to children along with all other social skills.

For example, there is no need to explain the reasons why you should not raise your voice at another person - this is a violation of personal space and rudeness.

It is also obvious that familiarity is not polite with a person of higher social status or simply not familiar.

The history of speech etiquette originates from hierarchical rules, where the elder automatically rose above the younger, women were allocated to a separate social group, and the gap between social classes was incredibly huge.

Humanity has kept most of the rules of speech etiquette unchanged or slightly modified.

Greetings

With the help of GREETING, interlocutors have the opportunity to express their affection to each other, show a sign of attention or respect.

General greeting rules:

1. The greeting begins with the words “Hello”; the expressions “Good morning”, “Good afternoon”, “Good evening” are acceptable.
2. The first to greet: a man when meeting a woman, who entered the room with those who are there, the youngest with the elders in age, position, status.
3. When greeting, it is not allowed to have a cigarette in your mouth or your hands in your pockets.
4. When greeting a woman, men take off their gloves and raise their hat (this rule does not apply to hats, caps and berets).
5. When greeting each other, men may not take off their gloves, but if one does take them off, then the opponent responds in kind.
6. Women respond to the greeting with a smile and bow their heads slightly. They may not take off their hats or take their hands out of their pockets.

Rules for greeting handshakes:

1. When meeting, men shake hands and at the same time say a greeting phrase, then inquire about the health of their family and loved ones. For example, “How is your father’s health?”, “How are the children doing?”
2. The man who is older in age or status offers his hand first.
3. Men do not shake hands with women, but sometimes it is acceptable if the lady wishes to show special respect. Only she can be the initiator of such a handshake.
4. Women can shake hands with each other; the married lady extends her palm first.
5. When entering a room where there are several people, you are required to shake hands with everyone if you extended it to at least one person present there.

Rules for kissing a lady's hand:

1. When meeting, only married women kiss their hands.
2. You can kiss a woman’s hand when meeting only if you are indoors; you should not do this outdoors.
3. To kiss, the man himself leans towards his hand, without raising it too high.

Basic rules of speech etiquette

Speech etiquette prescribes certain standards of communication for an individual, which are mandatory and have the nature of recommendations.

The following speech rules are mandatory:

• compliance with rules and literary norms in conversation;
• absence of profanity;
• avoidance of tactlessness, rudeness and disrespect;
• compliance with the required stages of speech - the beginning of the conversation, the main part of the conversation and the conclusion;
• absence of errors and distortion of terminology.

Speech etiquette recommendations require:

• speak to the point, avoiding empty, meaningless words.
• conduct a conversation, taking into account the level of development of the interlocutor - express yourself clearly for him;
• do not interrupt your opponent, listen completely;
• be polite and tactful;
• do not get personal during a dispute;
• maintain a calm tone.

Since it will not be possible to completely structure such a large concept - too many cultures and social groups use its principles, there are only basic rules that are acceptable for most modern communities:

1. Smooth, neutral intonation. Raising and lowering your voice is a deviation from the norm in standard conversation. The interlocutors should hear each other well, but those around them, if there are any, should not experience any inconvenience from someone else’s conversation.
2. Greetings and farewells. Every conversation must begin with a greeting (the type will depend on the situation) and farewell.
3. Introduction if there are more than two people in a conversation and someone does not know someone. It is very impolite to start a conversation with others without introducing yourself. Anyone who brings a new person to the company is obliged to introduce him. If there are no acquaintances in a dialogue between several people, the rule is not strictly observed.

The main principles are calmness, exclusion of conflict situations and a friendly (neutral) atmosphere. During a business conversation or any other formal meeting, expressing your emotions and attitude towards others is strictly not recommended.

Getting rid of surzhik

Unfortunately, this problem is relevant for a considerable number of residents of Ukraine - the speech culture of many people suffers from the use of elements of surzhik in communication, and for some, their speech consists entirely of this hybrid of Ukrainian and Russian languages. Analogues of surzhik also exist in other countries where people live in a mixed linguistic environment.

Constantly working on your speech, reading books and even dictionaries will help you overcome this obstacle. You can also ask your friends to correct you during a conversation if they notice that you have used the wrong word.

When dealing with verbal garbage, it is important to first determine which words are superfluous in your vocabulary, and then carefully monitor your speech. Record yourself and analyze what is said

Think about what words can be used to replace unwanted vocabulary, work with synonym dictionaries. Start studying speech styles - you must know these features in order to communicate culturally in different situations without contaminating the corresponding vocabulary in any way.

Types of speech etiquette

Speech is the main mechanism of verbal communication. Verbal communication can be internal, when words are spoken silently, and externally directed - oral (dialogue and monologue) and written.

Oral speech is constructed in the form of a dialogue or monologue. In dialogue, people exchange information, emotions or experiences with each other. The monologue comes from one person, but is directed at the audience or at oneself.

Conversational ethics is less formal than written ethics. Here omissions of words, replacement of phrases with an action or gesture are allowed.

The written form of ethics is limited by strict boundaries - stylistics, spelling and punctuation rules.

Since this is a broad concept, there is no single speech etiquette that ideally suits all social requirements. Specific people or social groups modify the rules to suit their needs without changing the main principles - this is how the classification of speech etiquette by type is born:

1. Formal or business. This is the etiquette that is usually meant by this word by the average person. It is used at events where guests do not know each other, at exhibitions, in the service sector, and at business negotiations.
2. Everyday. The easiest to learn and most common type. Applying the rules of everyday etiquette does not require effort; a well-educated and socially integrated person automatically follows most of the rules and norms of speech etiquette in the process of communication. Applicable in any situation where official etiquette or more rare forms of speech etiquette are not suitable.

Also, for non-standard situations that most people do not encounter, there are unique units of speech etiquette.

For example, religious - it is studied within the clergy of denominations or simply among believers and is practically not applicable in secular society. The same can be said regarding diplomatic and military etiquette.

In general, verbal communication is classified according to content and is:

• material - exchange of products of activity;
• cognitive (cognitive) – exchange of data, experience and knowledge;
• conditional (emotional) – exchange of mood;
• motivational – exchange of intentions;
• activity-based – exchange of skills as a result of joint activities.

Types of speech etiquette are divided according to interaction techniques and tasks.

1. Mask contact. This is formal communication, without trying to find out the character of the opponent.
2. Social communication. This form of verbal communication is pointless, since at such moments people talk about general topics, what they should talk about in this situation.
3. Formal role-playing appearance. The rules and content of communication are important here, and the social status of the interlocutor and his position in society are important.
4. Business conversation. This is interaction for the purpose of exchanging data and messages that are required to achieve the desired result.
5. Interpersonal communication. This type of speech etiquette is also called intimate personal communication, because it consists in revealing the deep personal qualities of the interlocutor.
6. Manipulative communication. This communication is aimed at obtaining benefit from the opponent.

Important! Any form of conversation is subject to certain regulations, which must be strictly observed.

Rules of speech.

Rules for the speaker:

The speaker is prescribed a friendly attitude

to the interlocutor.
It is prohibited with your speech to cause any kind of damage to the addressee
: offense, insult, neglect. Direct negative assessments of the interlocutor’s personality should be avoided.

politeness that is appropriate in a given communication situation (necessarily appropriate, “appropriate and proportionate,” and not exaggerated)

. This means that it is necessary to take into account the age, gender, official or social position of the addressee and his other social positions and roles and to compare one’s own social characteristics with these indicators of the partner.

The speaker is not recommended

to put one’s own “I” in the center of attention, one is instructed to be modest in one’s self-assessments, not to stubbornly and categorically impose one’s own opinions and assessments on the interlocutor (but this does not mean not to convince!), to be able to take the partner’s point of view, to be imbued with empathy.

The speaker is instructed to place the listener at the center of attention, taking into account his social roles, his personality and awareness of the topic, the subject of speech, and the degree of his interest. You should not skimp on linguistic means of addressing, constantly maintaining contact with attention, understanding, and interest.

The speaker needs to be able to choose a topic for conversation that is appropriate in a given situation, interesting, and understandable to the partner.

The speaker must follow the logic of the text, ensure that the conclusion does not contradict the premise, and that the consequences follow from the causes.

The speaker must remember that the threshold of semantic perception and concentration of attention of the listener is limited. Research shows that the most favorable length of an oral utterance is seven words plus or minus two words (i.e., 5-9 words), and the time of oral communication without a pause can last from 45 seconds to one and a half minutes and not significantly exceed this time. This means that it is recommended to use short phrases and not exceed the average length of continuous (without pauses) speaking.

The speaker must constantly select linguistic means in accordance with the chosen stylistic tone of the text, focusing not only on the addressee, but also on the communication situation as a whole, on the formality or informality of the situation.

The speaker must remember that in oral contact direct communication, the listener not only hears, but also sees him, therefore, receives from him many signals of non-verbal (non-verbal) communication: gestures, postures, facial expressions, general demeanor. the entire culture of behavior and culture of speech. First of all, it is necessary to maintain the distance between oneself and the partner accepted in a given national and social culture (unless, of course, the speaker is separated from the audience by a lectern).

Rules for the listener:

If someone addresses you with a speech, you need to stop what you are doing and listen carefully to what he is telling you. When listening, you must treat the speaker kindly, respectfully and patiently. Listen kindly and respectfully to your interlocutor, try not to interrupt him, not to confuse his thoughts, not to insert inappropriate or caustic remarks, and not to turn the listening into your own speaking.

When listening, focus on the speaker and his interests. Let him express himself in speech. Emphasize your interest in him, in his words - with glances, facial expressions, gestures, interjection and gestural “assents” (nodding your head), confirm the contact of attention and understanding.

In the role of a listener, you must be able to timely evaluate the interlocutor’s speech, agree or disagree with him, answer the question posed, and the urge to react with action and verbally. In other words, it is necessary to combine the role of the listener with the role of the speaker, skillfully entering into dialogue, but at the same time do not forget that one should not occupy the entire time space of the conversation with one’s own speaking.

If there are more than two listeners, you should not answer a question asked to another interlocutor, or generally respond to speech that is not directed at you. But if the one to whom the words are directed does not react, which, of course, is outside the rules of speech, then another, as if an outsider, listener can take upon himself the answer, thereby saving the situation in the general conversation.

The basis of speech etiquette is speech formulas

, the nature of which depends on the characteristics of communication.
Any act of communication has a beginning, a main part and a final part. In this regard, speech etiquette formulas
are divided into 3 main groups:

1) speech formulas for starting communication,

2) speech formulas used in the process of communication,

3) speech formulas for ending communication.

Functions of speech etiquette

Speech etiquette has certain functions that are very important for a person.

1. Establishing contact. Speech etiquette attracts the attention of the interlocutor, encourages him to make contact and possible acquaintance.
2. Maintaining contact. In this case, ethical communication helps maintain contact without delving into any topic of conversation. It is necessary to form an impression of the interlocutor and maintain a friendly connection.
3. Showing respect and positivity. To some extent, this is the main function of speech etiquette, which is carried out with words of greeting and farewell, apology, sympathy, request, etc.
4. Regulation of behavior. Compliance with speech norms makes people's behavior predictable and understandable for others, and also clarifies the social role of each interlocutor and determines the procedure for action in a given situation.
5. Conflict prevention. Speech etiquette promotes normal communication between people. A timely apology and politeness help to avoid sharp corners in a conversation, and if a conflict has already begun, to get out of it with the least losses.

Important! Etiquette communication is a prerequisite for conversation with others, which guarantees normal relationships between people. It gives a person positive qualities and facilitates interaction with society.

The main function is to establish positive contact with another person or group. Changes in Russian speech etiquette in recent years are just echoes of rituals created by ancient people as a universal constant of communication.

Many parts of them can be traced even now, for example, in handshakes, bows among Asian nationalities, and smiles.

All these seemingly insignificant mini-rituals have accompanied humanity for centuries. They help to show on a conscious and unconscious level that the interlocutor is respected and will be treated well.

Etiquette standards are a universal language in which you can agree with everyone.

Frequent violations and errors

Anyone can encounter errors in speech behavior. The most common of them include:

1. Use of inappropriate language, foul language, use of profanity.
2. Violation of rituals (did not say hello, did not thank, did not apologize, etc.).
3. The presence of jargon in speech (“finally”, “crazy”, “fly away”, etc.).
4. Sarcasm, commanding tone, rudeness, ignorance, lack of empathy towards the interlocutor.
5. Referring to a person present in the third person.

Thus, the norms of speech etiquette are applicable in any situation: from everyday routine to the exchange of experience at international conferences or diplomatic negotiations. Basic rules require the use of a calm tone, a friendly attitude, generally accepted vocabulary and maintaining subordination between interlocutors when speaking.

Linguistic and behavioral means

Speech is mostly words and other sounds, of course, but there are other means of expression. For example, gestures and position in space relative to your interlocutor.

All this is also very important and has significance both from the secular side and in terms of national characteristics, which are also taken into account.

The clearest example of a behavioral tool can be considered gesticulation. This is a completely normal phenomenon - gestures are used by a person as “amplifiers” that complement speech.

They are used to express emotions and send super-fast signals. There are quite strict rules regarding gesticulation, mainly they involve restraining it.

There is nothing wrong with pointing your palm to your interlocutor for a conversation or with a gesture inviting him to enter the room, but waving your arms and closing the distance with a person without his consent is unacceptable.

Linguistic and behavioral means are inextricably linked, but the former exist without the latter, and vice versa - not.

In speech etiquette, the first assistants are linguistic and behavioral means. These include:

• moderate gestures and facial expressions;
• communication distance;
• expressed goodwill and restrained emotionality;
• demonstration of interest;
• avoiding controversial situations;
• non-categorical nature of one’s own statements;
• exclusion of disapproval;
• avoidance of excessive interest in personal details;
• participation in general conversation;
• brevity and uniformity of communication with everyone;
• minimum information about yourself;
• discussion of neutral topics - children, animals, weather, travel;
• helping your interlocutor in a delicate situation;
• expressing disagreement by remaining silent, asking a question, or switching to another topic;
• moderate use of humor;
• ban on sarcasm;
• exclusion of rude and colloquial expressions;
• positive mood;
• compliance with time frames and frequency of communication.

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Speech etiquette formulas

At any stage, communication is accompanied by speech etiquette formulas - cliches and fixed expressions.

These are words of politeness that are intended for all occasions:

• words of greeting and farewell - “hello”, “I greet you”, “see you”, “goodbye”;
• apologetic phrases - “sorry”, “please forgive me”, “sorry for...”;
• address – “can I contact you?”;
• words of sympathy - “I sympathize”, “I sincerely sympathize”;
• begging phrases - “be so kind as to pass...”;
• invitation words - “I will be glad to see you”;
• compliments and encouragement - “you are a wonderful specialist”;
• gratitude - “I thank you from the bottom of my heart,” “thank you,” “I am very grateful to you.”

These formulas tell you how to behave in any situation and facilitate communication.

Speech etiquette and business communication

After everyday communication, business communication is the most common. This is logical - the level of medium-sized businesses is growing, more and more people are employed in creative professions or prefer to work for themselves.

It is acceptable to adhere to the standard rules of everyday etiquette at a business meeting, but in this way you will be able to gain respect from your interlocutor only if he himself adheres to a similar approach in business.

IMPORTANT! Depending on different life situations, business etiquette can also be divided into conditional groups.

Rules for successful formal communication

The main thing is no familiarity. Flirting between business partners is also excluded. Interlocutors must find the perfect balance between polite detachment and polite involvement. The first should not turn into arrogance, the second into obsession.

You should not adhere to the picture's officialdom. At a business meeting, there may well be appropriate jokes and conversations on abstract topics. Getting personal is taboo, it’s rude and can offend your interlocutor.

Punctuality, commitment and honesty. When creating a first impression, there are no trifles - don’t be late, don’t be rude to the staff.

Business communication is different in that it does not contain fragments that hint at personal topics. This communication is to the point - polite, courteous and impartial, but at the same time inviting. It is aimed at achieving mutual understanding and contact.

Official communication provides for the following rules:

• manners and speech in accordance with the specific situation;
• extreme clarity of speech - clear pronunciation, clarity of presentation;
• reliability of information;
• correctness;
• moderation;
• attentiveness;
• maintaining distance.

Principles of effective speech behavior: description of the relationships between the subjects of interaction.

The “return of rhetoric” in the second half of the 20th century, accompanied by the emergence of linguopragmatics and neo-rhetorics, prompted scientists to attempt to rethink the principles of effective speech behavior. Analyzing the conditions for mutual understanding and adequate interpretation of speech messages by conversation participants, H. Grice, in his 1975 work, again postulated a central principle common to the success of communication - the principle of “communicative cooperation” (cooperative principle).

The principle of cooperative cooperation obliges the participants in communication at each stage to make the contribution required by the course of the conversation, its goal accepted by the communicants. This principle is implemented in a number of more specific requirements that are followed by the subjects of speech interaction - the “Gricean maxims”. It is clear that these maxims go back to those rules of speech behavior of a speaker who wants to make his speech effective, which were formulated by Aristotle in “Rhetoric” as a generalization of the rhetorical practice of previous and contemporary eras:

The principle of “communicative cooperation” formulated by Grice reflects the quintessence of classical rhetorical thought and the essence of the rhetorical ideal (harmonious orientation of speech communication), so relevant for modern speech culture, especially pedagogical culture.

In research in this direction, some special categories were developed, the system of which turned out to be very effective as a tool for describing and analyzing the relationships between participants in verbal communication and the corresponding features of discourse, in particular pedagogical. In fact, this categorical system is now a generally accepted conceptual basis for describing the living matter of speech communication in the aspect of relations between its participants.

In her 1973 work, R. Lakoff formulated three principles of speech behavior, which she initially called “rules of politeness” (in the scientist’s later works they appear under the name “rules of contact” - Rules of Rapport). Let us note that the category “politeness” as part of this concept has a different content than the word “politeness” in a non-terminological meaning and the corresponding term of ethics and the theory of speech etiquette.

Three principles of R. Lakoff underlie politeness in the linguo-ethological sense, understood as the conditions for the implementation by language of its social function; They are the ones who determine the logic of human speech behavior. In linguoethology, politeness is defined as the speaker taking into account the results of the impact of his speech behavior on the addressee, constant monitoring and adjustment of speech behavior in order to optimize communication and make it successful.

At the same time, the essence of politeness consists of the habitual, practiced use of traditional techniques that have developed in a particular culture, allowing one to balance two opposing tendencies of communication in each speech act: 1) the desire to show friendliness, to get closer to others and 2) the desire to preserve one’s individuality, “sovereignty”, a certain distance.

Linguistic ethologists and sociolinguists proceed from the assumption that in communication a person is driven by both the need to gain approval from others and the need not to become completely dependent on them. Therefore, it is believed that the semantics of politeness has two main aspects – “positive” and “negative”.

Positive politeness uses an arsenal of all the techniques and ways of demonstrating a desire to get closer to the interlocutor accepted in a given speech culture (means of maintaining the so-called “positive face”); negative politeness is a system of means of maintaining the required distance: showing respect, i.e. recognition of the unequal status of members of a given social group.

Thus, politeness, like a two-faced Janus, turns to the participants in communication either its “positive” or its “negative” face. Thus, in languages ​​with the tradition of addressing “you” and “you”, the first formula is a manifestation of positive politeness, the second – negative.

The means of implementing “two-faced” politeness are varied; One of them may be silence as a significant absence of speech. In certain situations, silence implements negative politeness (cases of avoiding certain topics, pointedly ignoring negative facts: let us remember Chekhov’s remark about a well-mannered person who “will not notice” that sauce has been spilled on the tablecloth; silence can also be used as a manifestation of unobtrusiveness).

On the contrary, in a number of communication situations, silence can act as a demonstration of mutual understanding “without words,” i.e. a greater degree of intimacy, closeness, then becoming a positive trait (positive politeness).

So, there are two systems for the implementation of opposite tendencies operating in the complex phenomenon of politeness - positive and negative. These systems are called two politeness strategies. The terms “positive” and “negative” politeness have a disadvantage: they can be perceived as evaluative, although they are completely devoid of evaluative meaning. However, they are quite widely accepted.

“Rules of Politeness” by R. Lakoff can also be accepted as rules-recommendations, if they are taken together as “milestones”, denoting, as it were, segments of a continuous “various strategies of the human scale” of various strategies of human social and communicative behavior (in particular, speech behavior) .

These principles are:

1. Don’t impose (distance).

2. Give the right to choose (respect).

3. Be friendly (friendly simplicity, spontaneity).

Everyone can determine which “pole” they are usually closer to or which one they prefer in a particular communication situation. If we consider the “rules of politeness” as segments of a continuum of speech behavior strategies, then each of the principles determines one of the main such strategies: the preference of principle 1 characterizes the “distance strategy”, principle 3 – the opposite “proximity strategy”, principle 2 – following the “intermediate” , “uncertain” or “wait-and-see” communication strategy, when the right to choose (define) a speech strategy is given to the partner.

2. Fundamentals of effective communication in the tradition of foreign linguistics (G.P. Grice, J. Leach).

The basis of speech communication, according to G.P. Grice, constitutes the principle of cooperative cooperation (the principle of cooperation), which presupposes the willingness of partners to cooperate and obliges them to make at each stage of verbal communication the contribution that the current communicative situation requires of them. In his work “ Logic and Speech Communication ” he writes: “Your communicative contribution at this step of the dialogue should be such as is required by the jointly accepted goal (direction) of this dialogue.”

Next, the author identifies a number of specific postulates, the observance of which corresponds to the implementation of this principle. He divides these postulates into 4 categories: Quantity , Quality , Relationship and Method . Quantity category is associated with the amount of information that needs to be transmitted. This category includes the postulate: A statement should contain no more and no less information than required.

This statement is illustrated by the example of analogies in the field of non-speech interactions. If you help me fix a car, I naturally expect that your contribution will be no more and no less than what is required. For example, if at some point I need 4 nuts, I expect to receive 4 from you, not 2 or 6.

To the Quality G.P. Grice refers to the general postulate Try to make a statement true

and 2 specific ones: 1.
Don’t say what you think is false.
2. Don't say anything for which you don't have sufficient grounds. This situation is illustrated by the following example. It is natural for me to expect that your contribution will be sincere and not false. If you are helping me make a cake and I need sugar, I don't expect you to serve me salt. If I ask for bread, I do not expect to receive flint, etc.

with the Relationship is the postulate of relevance - Don't deviate from the topic.

At each step of joint action, it is natural for me to expect that the partner's contribution will be relevant in relation to the immediate goals of that step. When I knead dough, I don't expect you to hand me an interesting book or even a kitchen towel (although the same action might be an appropriate input in one of the later steps).

The category of Method is concerned not with what is said, but with how it is said. This applies to the general principle - Express yourself clearly.

and several private ones:

Avoid unclear expressions.

Avoid ambiguity.

Be brief (avoid unnecessary verbosity).

Be organized.

This is realized in the following nonverbal analogy. It is natural for me to expect that my partner will let me know what his contribution is and that he will carry out his actions with due speed.

“I formulated the postulates in this way,” writes G.P. Grice, as if the purpose of verbal communication is the most effective transmission of information; Naturally, this definition is too narrow, and the entire structure must be generalized in application to such general goals as influencing other people, controlling their behavior, etc.”

The author emphasizes the advisability of observing the principle of cooperation: “...anyone who strives to achieve the ultimate goals of verbal communication (this can be the transmission and receipt of information, influencing others and subordinating oneself to someone else’s influence, etc.) is expected to he is interested in this communication; verbal communication can be beneficial and useful only if the principle of cooperation and postulates are observed” (Grice G.P. Logic and speech communication // New in foreign linguistics. Issue 16. M., 1985, p. 226).

Another researcher J.N. Leach postulated another leading principle of communication - the principle of politeness (the principle of ethics ), which is a set of a number of maxims (Klyuev E.V. Speech communication: A textbook for universities and universities. M., 1998). Let us briefly describe them.

Maxim of tact . This is the maxim of the boundaries of the personal sphere. Ideally, any communicative act provides for a certain distance between participants. The rule should be observed: “Making the communicative goal of the interlocutor the subject of discussion is permissible only if this goal is explicitly (openly) indicated by him.” You should not touch on potentially dangerous topics (private life, politics).

Maxim of generosity . This is a maxim of not burdening the interlocutor; it protects him from domination during the communicative act. For example, the assumption should be formulated in such a way that it can be postponed; the partner should not be bound by a promise or oath. A good communicative act should not be uncomfortable for the participants in communication.

Maximum of approval. This maxim of positivity in evaluating others - do not judge others. The atmosphere in which verbal communication occurs is determined not only by the positions of the interlocutors in relation to each other, but also by the position of each in relation to the world and whether these positions coincide. If the assessment of the world (positive or negative) does not coincide with the assessment of the interlocutor, then this greatly complicates the implementation of one’s own communication strategy.

Maxim of modesty. This maxim of non-acceptance of praise addressed to oneself. One of the conditions for the successful deployment of a communicative act is realistic, as objective as possible, self-assessment. Severely overestimated or underestimated self-esteem can negatively affect the establishment of contact.

Maxim of consent. This is the maxim of neopositionality. It involves abandoning a conflict situation in the name of solving a more serious problem, namely, preserving the subject of interaction, “removing the conflict” through mutual correction of the communicative tactics of the interlocutors.

Maxim of sympathy. This is a maxim of benevolence that creates a favorable background for promising substantive conversation. Unbenevolence makes the speech act impossible. A certain problem is posed by the so-called indifferent contact, when the interlocutors, not being enemies, do not demonstrate goodwill towards each other. The maxim of benevolence gives reason to expect a positive development of the speech situation with the emerging conflict.

Grice's principle of cooperation and Leach's principle of politeness form the basis of the so-called communicative code, which is “a complex system of principles regulating the speech behavior of both parties during a communicative act and based on a number of categories and criteria” (Klyuev E.V. Speech communication: A textbook for universities and universities. M., 1998, p. 78).

The basic categories that form the communicative code are communicative (speech) goal and communicative (speech) intention.

The most important categories within the communicative code are the criterion of truth (fidelity to reality) and the criterion of sincerity (fidelity to oneself).

When considering the communicative code and analyzing the possibilities of its use in the practice of verbal communication, it should be borne in mind that the formulated maxims do not have absolute meaning, none of the maxims by themselves ensures successful interaction between interlocutors, compliance with one maxim may lead to a violation of another. Critics of the theory of speech acts draw attention to the isolation of the proposed schemes of speech communication from real social conditions and the failure to take into account many parameters of their possible use. However, it cannot be denied that the use of the principles described above allows us to optimize communication and make it more effective.

4. Principles of effective speech communication.

Effective speech communication is understood as its effectiveness while maintaining a balance of relations between communicants, achieving adequate semantic perception and adequate interpretation of the received message. The correct interpretation is considered to have taken place if the recipient interprets the main idea of ​​the text in accordance with the communicator’s intention. If the recipient has learned for what purpose the text was created, what exactly its author wanted to say with the help of all the linguistic means used, we can assume that he interpreted the text adequately. Inadequate understanding of the message can be a serious barrier to communication.

As researchers note, “the linguistic given “speech communication” is largely formed by non-linguistic factors and constructs extra-linguistic entities: relationships, actions, states, emotions, knowledge, beliefs, etc. Therefore, both the success of verbal communication and failures do not always depend on speakers’ choice of linguistic forms” (Culture of Russian Speech. M., 19998, p. 68).

Extra-linguistic conditions for the success of verbal communication, independent of the actual linguistic factors, include communicative interest (the need for communication), attunement to the inner world of the interlocutor, the ability of the listener to penetrate into the communicative intent of the speaker, and the external circumstances of communication. Let's look at these factors in more detail.

“Interest in communication cannot be fully characterized in linguistic terms, since it is in the sphere of action of the forces of social harmony and rules of behavior” (Culture of Russian speech. M., 1998, p. 59). With interest, there is always an agreement to listen, solidarity.

A very important condition for successful verbal communication is the attunement to the world of the interlocutor, the closeness of the worldview of the speaker and the listener. L.P. Yakubinsky defined this as the proximity of the speakers' apperception base. Past life experiences, similar interests and cultural canons give rise to rapid mutual understanding.

The main condition for successful verbal communication is the ability of the listener to penetrate into the communicative intent of the speaker. “Since communicative intention is formed at the preverbal level of speech-thought, and comprehension of the meaning of what is said occurs parallel to the linear development of the utterance, the listener does a great job of interpreting the speech flow and “reconstructing” the speaker’s intention, rethinking what was previously said and understood, and correlating his model of what is understood with real facts and the interlocutor’s line of behavior. This “work” is as instantaneous, simultaneous and biological in its essence as the process of speaking, so individual differences are natural here” (Culture of Russian Speech. M., 1998, p. 60).

With all the subtleties of individual perception of speech, the speaker and the listener proceed from the following fundamental factors of the theory of speech activity: a) logical structures and linguistic constructions are not completely correlative and not equal to each other, that is, there are laws of non-expression of the structure of thought; b) there are explicit and implicit ways of expressing meaning. This can be illustrated by the example of so-called indirect messages (metamessages).

- Dad, can I go to Lenka today? – asks the almost adult daughter.

“As you wish, Natalya,” the father answers.

The daughter’s question in this situation contains meta-messages that can be deciphered approximately like this: “Although I am already an adult and could not ask permission, I do it: I love and respect my father, I want to warn him about where I will be and get official permission." The father’s response also contains meta messages: “I understand why you are asking me this. You know that I don’t approve of Lenka or her company and I don’t want you to spend time there. I worry about you. I want to keep you safe. Still, I don’t want to forbid you anything. Choose Sami what is more valuable to you – my opinion or dubious pleasures.” By the way, the full form of the name Natalya is intended to convey another meta-message: “the answer must be taken seriously, this is important.” How can this situation be resolved? The daughter is free to “ignore” the metamessage and “understand” her father’s response in the literal sense. The answer seems to give her freedom of choice. That's a plus. For the father, this form of answer is also “beneficial” - if the daughter still goes to Lenka, this will not mean that she directly disobeyed him. There may not be an open conflict.

When using metamessages, real misunderstandings are possible. This can lead to hidden grievances and the accumulation of misunderstandings. Learn to differentiate between messages and meta messages. By the way, many cases of violations of understanding between men and women are explained by the fact that men tend to be guided primarily by the direct meanings of messages, while women, on the contrary, live in the element of indirect (indirect) messages, a woman more often looks for subtext, thinks about hidden meanings, which may not be present in a man’s speech be. Representatives of the stronger sex can rarely “unravel” those subtle nuances of meaning, those meta-messages that the representatives of the fair sex strive to convey to them with their speech behavior.

Thus, the expression “A thought expressed is a lie” fully corresponds to the actual situation when the content of verbal communication is broader than the meaning of all linguistic elements and knowledge of their meanings is not a guarantee of successful understanding.

The success of verbal communication is also influenced by external circumstances : the presence of strangers, the communication channel (telephone conversation, note, letter, face-to-face conversation), mood, emotional state, physiological state - all this can determine the fate of the conversation. Communication will be most successful if it occurs orally, the interlocutors are alone. But even favorable circumstances are not a guarantee of success. A conversation is “created” by speech segments, pauses, tempo, gestures, facial expressions, glances, postures; the conversation develops over time, and each subsequent remark “layers” on everything said previously, interacts with it, and the result of this interaction is unpredictable.

Intralinguistic (intralinguistic) parameters of successful communication include the speaker’s ability to vary the way of linguistic representation of a particular event. This is manifested, for example, in the fact that the topic of conversation “dictates” to the speaker the ways of presenting it in speech. Thus, the themes of patriotism and duty require special vocabulary, means of subjective authorial modality, different from those that can be used when discussing culinary recipes or in a story about a feast.

Mutual understanding, a correct interpretation of the speaker’s position on some issue, is possible only if the speech is the embodiment of a feeling-thought, if it is figurative, emotional, and resonates with the interlocutor.

Let us recall Tolstoy's thought: no words can ever force humanity to understand the world through boredom.

For successful verbal communication, the speaker should not strive to tell the interlocutor only the facts, the “naked truth,” the objective truth: he will still reveal his opinion. On the contrary, one should consciously combine “direct” communication (information) and “indirect”, putting the message in a “shell”, a “fleur” of one’s own understanding, which seeks sympathy from the addressee. It could be irony, humor, paradox, symbol, image. Such speech is always a search for agreement.

An important component of successful verbal communication is the speaker’s knowledge of the norms of etiquette speech communication. Regardless of politeness formulas, a language has a certain set of statements, fixed by the tradition of language use, which “prescribe” a certain form of response to the addressee. For example, for people who speak the language, it is not difficult to interpret the question How are you?

There is a response stereotype, speech etiquette behavior as a reaction to the expression
How are you?
Etiquette speech behavior is strictly predetermined not only by “traditional” questions, but also by the tone of the conversation, its style, and external circumstances. The basic rule for responding to an address: the remark must fit into the context of the conversation, that is, be appropriate. To do this, every speaker of the language needs to know the meaning of “non-literal expressions”, the meaning of which is not derived from the meaning of their constituent word forms. To the request Could you please pass the bread?

or
won't you pass the bread?
The addressee must answer:
“Yes, please
,” but not “
I can
.”

4. Causes of communication failures.

Communication failure can be defined as “the failure of the initiator of communication to achieve the communicative goal and pragmatic aspirations, as well as the lack of interaction, mutual understanding and agreement between the participants in communication” (Culture of Russian speech. M., 1998, p. 68). Extralinguistic reasons for communication failures include the following:

— differences in pictures of the world and in their fragments; discrepancy between assessments of reality phenomena;

— violation of the conditions of place, time and environment of communication; violation or incorrect choice of behavioral stereotypes (including etiquette);

- emotional incontinence of the speaker and his failure to take into account the emotional state of the partner;

— incorrectly chosen communicative role;

- misreading or ignoring the partner’s communicative intentions;

— inadequacy of the communicant’s mental state to the communication situation;

- acoustic deficiencies in speech pronunciation, etc.

an alien communication environment greatly influences the success of verbal communication , since in such an environment disharmony reigns and the interlocutors are not attuned to each other’s inner world. In dialogue communication in front of strangers, the interlocutors feel discomfort, which prevents them from realizing themselves in a given situation and determining the tone of their speech behavior. A low degree of familiarity can aggravate discomfort and make it difficult to find a “common language.” A student who comes to visit his fellow student in the dormitory may find himself in such an unfavorable situation; a friend visiting a friend at her work. Regardless of the communicative intent, social interaction is difficult. The situation can be complicated by distractions: interference from third parties, forced pauses, distractions from the conversation for various reasons. With polylogue in an alien communicative environment, it is impossible to achieve agreement in a conversation on any topic due to social, psychological differences, differences in education, understanding of moral standards, due to different interests, opinions, assessments.

A serious reason for the alienation of communication participants may be a violation of the parity of communication. This manifests itself in a violation of the rules of cooperation, solidarity between interlocutors, and is expressed in the dominance of one of the participants in the conversation. Starting from the initial remark, the same person chooses the topic of conversation, asks questions, interrupts the interlocutor, without waiting for a signal of perception and correct understanding, turning the dialogue into a monologue. In this case, the determining role is played by such factors as the psychological traits of the participants in communication, social status, emotional relationships, and cultural canons.

The actual linguistic reasons for communicative failures include the following: unresolved polysemy of linguistic units; non-distinction of paronyms; incorrect or inaccurate word usage (incorrect word choice); use of incomprehensible (foreign) vocabulary; inappropriate occasionalisms; incorrect word order; unnecessary verbosity; use of invective and many others. other.

Thus, the reason for breaking contact with the interlocutor and ending the conversation may be an inappropriate remark addressed to the listener about his actions or personal qualities, which can be interpreted as an unfriendly attitude of the speaker.

Inappropriateness can be caused by the speaker’s inability to grasp the mood of the interlocutor, determine his train of thought. This is typical for conversations between unfamiliar people. In the initial remark, there are often cases of using personal and demonstrative pronouns in the hope that the listener knows what is being said: He always does this after the course

(fellow passenger on the bus
) - Who?
— The drivers, I say, are inexperienced. It jerks from its place, the turn is not worked out. – Ah... It’s clear that the listener’s train of thought was not the same as that of the initiator of the conversation. Hence the misunderstanding.

A discrepancy between the sociocultural characteristics of the participants in communication can also lead to inappropriate phrases leading to communication failure. Wed. humorous ending to the dialogue given in the article by N.N. Troshina: “The businessman Meisl comes from Chernivtsi to Vienna. In the evening he wants to go to the Burgtheater. He asks at the theater box office: “Well, what do you have on stage today?” - "As you wish". - "Great! Let there be a "Queen of Csardas"

(Troshina N.N. Pragmastylistic context and perception of text // Pragmatics and semantics. Collection of scientific and analytical reviews of INION. M., 1991, p. 89). If you know that the Burgtheater is a drama theater, and As You Like it is a play by Shakespeare, then the communicative failure of the businessman will be obvious.

Failure of communicants to reach agreement and misunderstanding of each other can be caused by a low level of language competence. Wed. dialogue between a daughter and mother who came to Moscow from the suburbs. Daughter: It’s good that I didn’t go to technical school in Moscow, otherwise we would have been going back and forth every day

.
– Mother: And in the evening I would arrive on eyebrows.
– Daughter:
Why on the eyebrows
?
– Mother: Well
,
I would be very tired.
The mother does not know the meaning of the expression on the eyebrows - “about a drunk: with difficulty, barely, barely getting there” (Ozhegov S., Shvedova N., 1992, p. 58), so she uses the expression inappropriately. It seems to my daughter that she has never heard this expression at all. Here we see a typical case of a low level of language proficiency: the use of set expressions is inappropriate, ignorance of the exact meaning of the word.

Another type of misunderstanding or misunderstanding involves the lack of clarity to the listener of many words with abstract meanings, term words, or borrowed words.

Communication discomfort, misinterpretation and alienation arise when the linear organization of an utterance is incorrect. Syntactic errors in agreement, stringing of cases, truncated sentences, lack of understanding, jumping from one topic to another - all this causes tension in attention, failure to fulfill the communicative expectations of the listener. If the speaker informs the listener on a topic known to him, then the listener has to do a lot of “work” to figure out the overall picture, and if the topic of the message is unknown to the addressee, then the speaker risks being misunderstood. An illustration of such communication failures can be a dialogue between two schoolchildren, when one of them tells a friend about his impressions of the action movie he saw:

- He’s so hungry for him... Well, in general...

- Who? Whom?

- Well, this one, which is at the beginning.

- And that one?

- What about that one? He didn't climb anymore...

Or the use of personal pronouns in a comic miniature by A.P. Chekhov "You and You".

- Why do we need to intervene? His wife, he teaches... Two are fighting, the third don’t interfere... Abramka began to calm him down so that he wouldn’t disgrace him in the tavern, but he hit Abramka in the ear, Abramkin is his worker... And he grabbed him, lifted him and brought him to the ground... Then he sat on him on horseback and let's drum on his back... We pulled him out from under him by his legs.

- Whom?

- It is known who... Who was sitting astride...

- Who? - Yes, this is the one I’m talking about.

Lecture No. 6

Stages of business communication

Like any communication, a business conversation is divided into stages:

• greeting – the first person to say the greeting is the one who is younger in age or rank;
• dialogue, observing canons and politeness;
• resolving controversial situations - the ability to avoid sharp corners, constructive dialogue;
• daily interaction – solving daily issues;
• nonverbal communication – attentiveness and cordiality, expressed in gestures and facial expressions;
• farewell is the final stage of communication, on which the mutual impression depends.

Performance

PRESENTATION is an important component of successful dialogue. Correctly introducing yourself or others creates a positive impression on your opponent and allows you to establish business contacts.

Submission rules:

1. Those junior in position, rank, rank, status, age are introduced to seniors.
2. Unmarried and unmarried people are represented as married.
3. Men are introduced to women; if a man is sitting, he should stand up and bow slightly.
4. Those leaving are not introduced to those arriving.
5. The submission includes the first name, patronymic, last name, and, where necessary, indicates the type of activity, profession, and status.
6. It is acceptable to introduce yourself; in these cases, they extend their hand for a handshake and clearly identify themselves.

Etiquette for business conversations on the phone

Telephone conversations also have their own rules:

• they begin with a greeting and introduction with the name of the speaker's organization and position;
• the conversation should be concise and to the point;
• it is necessary to maintain the sequence of the conversation;
• negotiations are conducted politely, slowly, in a calm voice;
• diction must be clear;
• After the conversation, you need to say goodbye words.

Important! Before starting business negotiations, it is better to write the essence of the issue on paper so that during the conversation you do not jump from one point to another.

Speech etiquette of different social groups

Speech etiquette is established within each social group. Its features depend on the following aspects:

• age;
• gender;
• education;
• level of education;
• professional direction;
• level of income;
• hierarchical affiliation.

The desire to master speech etiquette is the key to personal development and an indicator of education.

Compliance with the norms and rules of speech improves the culture of a person and society as a whole. That is why the educational process pays maximum attention to this issue.

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