What is determination and how to develop this quality in yourself

What should a woman be like? Feminine or purposeful?

This question arose one morning while talking with my eldest daughter. I even had to take a pen to write down the thoughts that arose! I really wanted to delve deeper into this topic. Perhaps, after reading the title of the article, you ask: “Why feminine or purposeful ? But can’t purposeful woman be feminine ?”

Of course it can! The possibilities of a woman, I believe, recently, are generally limitless! But the question is, what price does she pay for her own choices, her goals and how to achieve them?

Definition

If we look into the encyclopedic dictionary, we will see the following definition.

Purposefulness is a positive moral-volitional quality of an individual, which manifests itself in the form of the ability to set clear and achievable tasks and goals.

That is, determination is the concentration of feelings, thoughts and actions on persistent movement towards one’s goal and its achievement.

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In your own words, a purposeful person is someone who:

knows exactly what he wants;
understands how high the probability is that the goal will be achieved;
knows how to keep the final goal in mind and not switch to something else;
has strong convictions that he will not give up even under pressure from circumstances;
systematically moves towards the realization of his task, regardless of obstacles.

Quotes from famous people

Many researchers talk about determination. The most striking quotes from writers and scientists are:

“The main stone of any success is determination” (N. Hill);

“A purposeful kid is able to defeat a weak-willed giant” (N. Hill);

“Clarity of goal and an ardent desire to achieve it are the key to victory” (N. Hill);

“The basis of determination is the ability to abstract from secondary things” (M. Dreyspitz);

“A goal-oriented person seeks means to achieve a goal. If they don’t exist, he creates them himself” (W. Channing).

Qualities of a purposeful person

When they talk about determination, they mean a number of psychological qualities:

Discipline. This is a character trait that gives a person the ability to plan his activities and strictly adhere to this plan. Ability to set priorities and consistently resolve emerging issues.
Determination. Carries the skill to independently, timely and competently make responsible decisions and persistently implement them.
Hard work. A trait that manifests itself in a person’s positive attitude towards the work process.
Self-control. Allows you to achieve goals by taking control of your emotions, thoughts and behavior. The ability to not succumb to momentary temptations, keeping the true goal and values in mind.
Persistence. The ability to overcome all difficulties and not stray from the intended path when faced with possible obstacles. This quality can be compared to the first steps of a child who falls and gets up every time to continue his attempts.
Strength of will. Consciously activated energy within the individual, which is directed towards achieving the desired result.
Mindfulness. This is the perception of reality here and now, the ability to notice and recognize what attention is directed to.

Eliminating Fears

With the advent of wealth, many fears go away. The person understands that the difficulties were artificially inflated. This is not surprising, because many problems arise under the influence of financial difficulties. It is difficult to think soberly when there are not enough funds to pay off the debt for rent, pay for utilities in the apartment and solve other problems. In fear of hunger, the most terrible thoughts arise in your head and have to be driven away. With the advent of money, reality becomes more rosy, confidence appears, and fears automatically become a thing of the past.

Examples from life

Determination can manifest itself in any area and undertaking: business, sports, education, etc. This character trait helps to quickly achieve results and improve your standard of living, for example:

a purposeful person achieves great results in his professional activities, quickly climbs the career ladder, receiving recognition from management and material incentives;
in sports, such a person quickly achieves good results and takes prizes in competitions;
determination helps to maintain motivation in studies and master new material more effectively;
in creativity, this quality helps to bring the work started to the end: complete a painting, write a book, a piece of music, etc.

Determination is often confused with fanaticism. But it's not the same thing. I will explain the fundamental difference between them with an example.

Imagine two people going to the gym to gain muscle mass. One is raving about the results and doesn’t get off the exercise machines all night long. Another clearly set a course for getting himself in order for the summer season, regularly attends training, not forgetting about other areas of his life - family, work, leisure.

What is the difference? A fanatic limits himself to any pleasure and cannot think about anything other than his goal. For a purposeful person, his task is also important; he keeps it in his head and gradually moves towards it, but at the same time maintains his sanity and can make adjustments to his route if circumstances require it.

Examples of determination can be seen in the autobiography of any successful person. Let's remember the story of Li Ka-shing - the richest man in China and one of the most influential investors in Asia. At the age of 12, he was left as the only breadwinner in the family and was forced to quit his studies and put up with any hard work.

The only thing the father left behind to his son was a love of learning and determination. Ka-Shing set himself the goal of becoming a rich man and did not stop studying in his free time. Now we can see the fruits of his perseverance.

Is it possible to develop this quality?

In psychology, determination has a dual nature. To a certain extent, this personality quality can be inherent in us from birth, just like temperament. In this case, one would assume that goal-oriented parents would have similar children. But this is not entirely true.

If you do not make some efforts and do not use the right methods of education, the necessary inclinations will remain untapped potential.

Purposefulness is fully acquired with experience, environment, education and self-education.

Let's consider how to develop it in yourself and what methods there are for this.

Expansion of consciousness

Often, in order to calm the mind, we fence ourselves off from human passions in life and books. We want not to think in order to catch the voice of infinity in the ensuing silence, which will tell the truth. But the flow of thoughts does not stop and cannot be controlled, leading to madness.

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We experiment with mantras, meditation, yoga, bioenergy, breathing and bodily practices in order to change perception, shift the assemblage point, and expand consciousness.

But you can expand your consciousness only by reading classical literature.

Our consciousness is the words with which it was filled as we developed. Each carried its own meaning, emotions, intertwined images and associations. So consciousness expanded, filling the storehouses of vocabulary. The more words, the wider the consciousness.

As a rule, a person with a sound vector has read a lot since childhood. All literature is reflections on where the animal nature in a person ends and where the human, spiritual nature begins. The characters in the books are openly or covertly trying to find the meaning of life. Evgeny Onegin spent his entire life searching for his purpose in Pushkin’s novel. Pechorin does not find it in Lermontov’s “Hero of Our Time” either.

Brilliant classic writers of the 19th and early 20th centuries reveal the human soul. Give precise psychoanalytic meaning. Books help us not to isolate ourselves. They redirect our attention to the feelings and thoughts of others. Don’t be horrified and throw it away, but discover how people work. We are filled with grief, we are tormented, we find words about ourselves. Psychoanalysis occurs through works of classical literature because they accurately correlate with the psyche.

The key to our existence is hidden within us, in the psyche. But not in the psyche of each individual, but in the general psyche of all people.

How to become purposeful

One of the main reasons for undeveloped determination is banal laziness, which, in turn, is born from a lack of motivation. Why are we not motivated enough? Most likely because we chose our target incorrectly.

This is where a frequent problem arises when we give up on something we started halfway through and become disappointed in the task at hand and in ourselves.

Therefore, the first milestone that is important to pass on the path to becoming purposeful is making the right choice. He will set you up for a long and persistent struggle for your goal.

To understand what is true for you and what is false, that is, imposed by society, you should listen to yourself more often, study yourself, your thoughts and desires.

You can read about how to set goals correctly in the article.

Thus, choosing the right goal is already half the battle on the path to determination. But what to do next?

Believe in yourself. Often, self-doubt prevents us from achieving results. Obstacles and competition frighten you, you give up and the initial passion disappears. Remember that there is no victory without struggle, and the one who walks will master the road.
Learn to prioritize. In order not to scatter your energy, you need to be able to distinguish the important from the unimportant, the urgent from what can wait, and also get rid of activities that can be called a waste of time.
Plan. It is difficult to achieve a goal when there is no clear action plan. Break big tasks into smaller ones and allow yourself breaks.
Learn to concentrate. This means reacting less to irritating factors and constantly keeping the main goal in mind. Don't waste time on things that don't fit into the master plan.
Come up with ways to motivate. Some people are helped by visualization, others imagine the moment of achieving the goal and their feelings at the same time. Try rewarding yourself for taking small steps.
Overcome your own weaknesses. Not everyone is ready to develop. Many strive to be better than others, but the one who can surpass himself always wins. Test the boundaries of your comfort zone and go a millimeter beyond its limits. And so on step by step.

How to raise sense of purpose in a child

Earlier I mentioned that determination is largely determined by proper upbringing. Regardless of what genes are in the child and what environment will shape his personality in the future, the primary criterion in upbringing is always the parents.

How to make sure your child grows up purposeful? He should see a similar example of behavior. If a parent spends hours lecturing about how important it is to reach a goal, but at the same time retreats from completing their tasks at the first obstacle, there will be no point.

The child must not only know how to do it, but also have before his eyes the practical application of this knowledge using the example of his main authorities - his parents.

So the advice is simple. To raise a purposeful child, develop self-control and willpower, make specific plans and always achieve them. And the child will follow your example.

Useful books and courses

I suggest you read books on self-development that will help maintain motivation in difficult times:

"To hell with all of it! Go ahead and do it!”, Richard Branson;
"Drive. What really motivates us”, Daniel Pink;
“Try it - it will work! When was the last time you did something for the first time?”, Seth Godin;
“The subconscious can do anything”, John Kehoe;
“Atlas Shrugged”, Ayn Rand;
“Whatever you choose. Decisions that affect your life”, Tal Ben-Shahar;
“Strategy for happiness. How to determine your purpose in life and become better on the way to it,” Jim Loehr.

I recommend reading other books about achieving goals.

List of interesting self-development courses:

Emotional intelligence from the online platform Vikium;
Critical Thinking by 4brain;
Your course to success from Advance;
Personal Future Design on Udemy.

You can learn about other useful courses and trainings on achieving goals on our blog.

We are engaged in visualization

In short, we can say that it is a mental representation of the desired goal as if we had already achieved it. Before practicing visualization, it is worth mastering muscle relaxation, proposed by the American doctor E. Jacobson - it will help relieve emotional and muscle tension that prevents you from focusing on visualization.

In addition, pictures and photographs with objects of our desires depicted on them or reminiscent of them, which can be hung in a visible place, will intensify our actions.