Good day, dear readers of my blog! Recently, the word perfectionist has begun to appear frequently in everyday life, and many are wondering - who is this? Today I will reveal in detail the definition of this word and talk about the positive and negative traits of this type of personality. In the article you will also see several photos that illustrate figuratively speaking “Hell” and “Heaven” for a perfectionist.
The meaning of the word perfectionist
The word perfectionist comes from the English perfect, which means perfection. But since there are no perfect people, perfectionists simply strive for this.
Perfectionism can be either an adequate personality trait or a deviation from the norm; in this case, it is a neurosthenic form. In Tal Ben-Shahar's book “The Perfectionist Paradox,” these types are called adaptive and maladaptive perfectionism.
There are several types of perfectionism:
- self-directed: the desire to be ideal;
- directed towards others: high demands on others;
- peace-oriented: the belief that the world should conform to certain rules and laws.
Some people believe that perfectionist and idealist are synonyms, but these are concepts from different areas and there is not much in common between them.
Myths about introverts you should stop believing
Introverts are unfriendly
Because introverts tend to avoid large gatherings and generally don't have as wide a network as extroverts, some people believe this is due to their unfriendliness. However, this is not at all true! Quite the opposite - since they prefer communication in small groups, their relationships often turn out to be deeper than those of extroverts.
Introverts can't be leaders
Although, when imagining a collective image of a leader, people often attribute to him the qualities of an extrovert, introverts also cope well with the role of a leader. What helps them do this is the ability to listen to subordinates and the ability to stay focused on long-term goals.
Introverts are difficult to get close to
Yes, it’s true that introverts prefer more thoughtful and close communication with a small group of people to superficial acquaintance with everyone. They may not like to open up to everyone who wants to chat about “nothing”, but the people they are close to know them very well and form strong friendships with them.
A perfectionist's paradise
There are many photographs on the Internet on the topic “heaven and hell for a perfectionist.” Here I have selected the most striking examples. Perhaps this name is somewhat exaggerated, but there is, of course, some truth in this.
In the “perfectionist’s paradise” pictures, everything is neat and harmonious. Each item is in its place, everything must match in shape, size and color.
Who are pseudo-intellectuals
To understand this issue, you must first understand who is called an intellectual. According to Ozhegov's explanatory dictionary, this is a person Ozhegov's Explanatory Dictionary online with a highly developed intellect. Not to be confused with an intellectual Ozhegov's Explanatory Dictionary online - a mental worker in the fields of science, technology and culture. The word “intellectual” itself came Historical Dictionary of Gallicisms of the Russian Language into the Russian language from French in the 90s of the 19th century.
Accordingly, a pseudo-intellectual is someone who wants to be known as a person with developed intellect and extensive knowledge, but is not a Pseudo-intellectual. Merriam-Webster.
Pseudo-intellectualism is often talked about in cases where people use knowledge as a means of self-affirmation, especially on the Internet. This may refer to demonstrative reading of books, ridiculing the “narrow-minded” majority, mocking mistakes in writing, and inappropriate use of foreign words. In general, we are talking about a kind of snobbery of individuals who aggressively prove their point of view even when no one asked about it.
It is worth mentioning here that intelligence by definition is Intelligence. Large psychological dictionary. - M., 2007 can only be a criterion for assessing a person by other people. That is, only those around you can recognize you as an intellectual, and not you yourself, which, obviously, pseudo-intellectuals do not agree with.
Hell of a perfectionist
If an ordinary person looks at photographs of the “hell of a perfectionist,” he may not notice anything, or some obvious disharmony will slightly hurt the eye. But for a perfectionist, this is truly a nightmare.
Causes of perfectionism
Perfectionism develops from early childhood. If parents show love and praise to a child only during his successes, then most likely he will grow up to be a perfectionist. At school, such children are afraid of getting a bad grade, as this may cause parental disapproval. Sometimes even a B can instill horror in them, which is why perfectionism is often called the “excellent student syndrome.”
As a rule, men are more at risk of becoming a perfectionist, since high expectations are placed on them from childhood. A man is the future head of the family, which means he is responsible for his wife and children. Therefore, from childhood, the stronger sex becomes demanding of itself and others.
But sometimes women put an unbearable burden on their fragile shoulders and try to be perfect in all areas of life: family, career, appearance, etc. This often happens because of movies and magazines. After looking at beautiful images, a woman has a dream to live up to these ideals in everything. But in real life, unlike on television, it is impossible to be perfect in everything.
Sage
In a time when there was no Internet, telephone, telegraph, and books were “written” on cave walls or wooden tablets, there lived one man who knew the answers to all questions. People came to him from all over the earth and asked and asked... Why does the earth rotate? How many stars are there in the sky? What is the legal limit of blood alcohol for a driver? Although no, they probably didn’t ask about the latter, but it doesn’t matter. It is important that this man answered all the questions thoroughly and intelligently and never said: “I don’t know.” People were amazed and called this man a sage, that is, not just smart, but possessing the highest wisdom. In fact, the man was not a sage, he simply had knowledge.
Personal qualities of perfectionists
Like any personality type, perfectionists have their positive and negative sides. The following are the most common signs:
- the desire to do everything perfectly;
- meticulousness;
- increased attention to detail;
- painful perception of criticism;
- excessive demands on oneself and others
Positive traits
The main positive trait of a perfectionist is hard work and self-improvement. Such people painstakingly hone their skills in their chosen field and do not stop until they achieve the best results.
Many famous people have achieved success precisely because of this quality. For example, Steve Jobs. He was demanding of his employees and the quality of work performed. According to his instructions, even hidden microcircuits were given an aesthetic appearance. This list also includes Leo Tolstoy, Nietzsche, Kant, Alexander the Great, etc.
Perfectionists are good workers. If you entrust him with a task, you can be sure that it will be completed efficiently. But you should not give him work that needs to be done urgently, since due to excessive care, the completion may take a long time.
Perfectionists are neat and clean. Their desk is always perfectly tidy; you won’t see creative chaos on it, like many workers. Their home is always in impeccable order, everything is in its place and arranged on shelves.
Negative qualities
Perfectionists have a very difficult time in family life. In their subconscious there is an unattainable ideal of family, and if suddenly something does not correspond to this image, then attempts begin to remake their household members. This is where the problems begin, since it is practically impossible to re-educate people, they become frustrated and irritable.
Another negative impact of perfectionism is the fear of not being able to cope with the work or doing it poorly. A person who is overcome by such fear is called a procrastinator. The life credo of such people is: “Either everything or nothing.” As a rule, perfectionist procrastinators do not even start work if they know that they cannot do it flawlessly.
Due to the constant desire to achieve the highest success, such people stop enjoying even good results. They always feel like they need to do even better. This causes emotional exhaustion and often leads to stress and depression.
Ambitious smart guy, subspecies “snob”
In the 19th century, snobs were people who wanted to belong to high society and followed the currently popular “fake it 'till you make it” attitude. They led a lifestyle corresponding to high society, were interested in elite art, communicated on high-secular topics and distanced themselves from everything common and worldly to the best of their ability. It was precisely attempts to move away from the simple, mass and worker-peasant culture, as well as a disdainful attitude towards the “lower class” that made a person a snob and the butt of jokes.
Examples of snobs:
Becky Sharp ("Vanity Fair" by W. Thackeray) - used her French origin to appear superior to her surroundings in the girls' boarding school.
Ellochka the cannibal (“The Twelve Chairs” by I. Ilf and E. Petrov) used her last money to buy furniture to furnish her apartment in accordance with the pictures from fashion magazines.
Jourdain (“The Bourgeois in the Nobility” by Molière) tries to imitate the noble class in order to impress his beloved, the Marquise Dorimena.
A modern snob, as a rule, is indignant at the poverty of taste, narrow views and low level of erudition of ordinary people. Sometimes he obsessively, in a condescending manner, tries to instill in those around him a taste and interest in the “high”, be it art, fashion or leisure options.
How to stop being a perfectionist
People whose lives are marred by excessive perfectionism are interested in the question: how to become less demanding of yourself and others? In this regard, psychologists give the following recommendations:
- Set your priorities. It should be understood that it is impossible to succeed in all areas. Choose the most important goals, and do not waste your nerves and energy on unimportant things.
- Learn to enjoy any results. The world is not only black and white (success or failure), but also in-between. Even if the result does not meet your expectations, you can simply enjoy the rewarding experience.
- Even if you are still far from an ideal image or your loved ones do not meet your expectations, everyone has good qualities and successes, even small ones. Don't just focus on the negative, don't forget to celebrate when you see something good.
- Get plenty of rest. Perfectionists are susceptible to overstrain and exhaustion, as they work and work on themselves almost without interruption. Set aside at least 1 day a week that you dedicate to rest. Try meditation or yoga to relieve nervous tension.
Probably everyone could recognize someone they know in this description, or perhaps you yourself are a perfectionist. I hope you were able to learn something useful from this article, then add it to your social networks and share with friends. Sincerely, Ruslan Tsvirkun.
20+ items that people have found better uses for (23 photos)
Author: White Fly
04 December 2021 08:30
Community: Idea Factory
Tags: design ideas unexpected non-standard use new life of old things conscious consumption witty style
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Our grandmothers used torn stockings as storage for onions, and our grandfathers filled a shoe polish box with sand and played hockey with it like a puck. Now our standard of living is much higher, but the trend for conscious consumption is in fashion, and we still come up with non-standard methods of using familiar objects. And some of these methods turn out to be very smart!
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Many needlewomen use tin boxes made from butter cookies to store small items for sewing and knitting.
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Virtual reality systems are well known to reduce phantom pain in amputees. The illusory component of a virtual reality system is similar to mirror therapy, but more effective.
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Sugar-free gummy bears will sell even better as chewable laxatives: it turns out that the drug's effects include one.
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Tampons were invented to cover bullet wounds and bleeding noses. Only then did women come up with another way to use them. By the way, nurses were the first to invent it.
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Cheap shaving foam cleans tiles, fixtures and shower glass better than any specialized product.
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“I was prescribed diabetes medication even though I didn’t have diabetes. But this drug helped me get pregnant after almost a year and a half of infertility.”
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Botox. It was originally used to combat strabismus, then to combat spasms of the facial muscles. Then doctors noticed that it smoothed out wrinkles. Botox is now also used to treat migraines. Who would have thought that a toxin that temporarily paralyzes muscles would find such widespread use?
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“I very rarely use flathead screwdrivers for their intended purpose. But they never lie without work. They are useful in a variety of ways - as chisels, scrapers, punches, research tools, very small crowbars, inconvenient but still chopsticks... Their possibilities are endless!”
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“The doctor prescribed her prostate medicine for kidney stones. It relaxes the ureter, allowing the stones to pass, making surgery or other procedures unnecessary. She was also prescribed another blood pressure medication, which almost immediately reduced her anxiety. She instantly became a different person. This is amazing!
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Once upon a time there was a rat poison that, when taken, caused the rodents' blood to stop clotting and cause them to literally bleed to death from internal bleeding. The drug washed away vitamin K, which is what its effect was based on. However, over time, rats and mice became resistant to this poison: the smart ones learned to avoid it, and the adapted ones had more complex forms of vitamin K. And after some time, a certain Navy officer tried to commit suicide by taking four packs of this poison, but after taking the vitamin K, which stops the blood thinning effect, he instantly returned to life. As a result, its creators chose a different route for this now ineffective rat poison, creating the heart drug Warfarin based on it.
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Ketchup cleans copper and gold better than most toxic chemicals sold as cleaning products.
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“In an Asian home, dishwashers and empty ovens serve as shelves for storing dishes.”
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“Sticky notes were invented by accident when the glue used in them was rejected as an adhesive because it was not strong enough. The inventor had a musician friend who liked how easy it was to attach notes to a music stand using this glue, and how easy it was to remove them later. As a result, now we have stickers.”
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Talcum powder is great for removing excess sand from your feet when leaving the beach. It will help you put on your shoes and avoid walking around with socks and shoes full of sand for the rest of the day.
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“I used to be in charge of cleaning cars at a rental company. We didn't have time to thoroughly clean every car, and sometimes dogs were carried in cars. We had a rubber brush to remove dog hair, but it barely worked. But if you put on a regular rubber cleaning glove, you can get hair out of the seats and carpet the first time.”
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An old safety razor will remove pills from knitted clothing without any problems.
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“Hairspray is great for removing baby paint scribbles from the couch.”
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“The half-sphere spoon is designed for balling melons, but works great for coring apples and pears.”
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“I work with children and I smoke a pipe. So I know from my own experience: pipe cleaners are great for children’s creativity.”
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Play dough was invented as a wallpaper cleaner, but in this capacity it did not gain as much popularity as it did as a children's toy.
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“I've been using a climbing carabiner as a keychain for 10 years. Try it, it’s much more convenient than a regular keychain.”
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“Superglue was invented by accident when engineers were unable to separate sheets of glass after trying to make clear plastic. Later it was used on the battlefield to temporarily protect wounds from infection.”
Source: - translated specifically for
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Pros and cons of a pragmatist
Let's understand the psychology of pragmatists together in order to better understand this type of people. For convenience, I have divided their characteristics into pros and cons. However, it is important to understand that this division is very arbitrary. With moderately expressed pragmatism, the advantages significantly outweigh the disadvantages. If this trait becomes hypertrophied, the shortcomings bloom in full bloom.
Let's start with the positives.
- Self-sufficiency. Pragmatists prefer to rely only on themselves. They are 100% confident in themselves, but not so much in those around them. They do not expect support and approval from anyone, do not become dependent, and provide themselves with everything they need.
- Rationality. In their actions they rely on reason - it almost never lets them down. Pragmatists have developed critical thinking, they perfectly analyze incoming information and draw the right conclusions. They are very difficult to deceive and confuse.
- Thrift. These people treat money very carefully. They do not allow themselves to buy unnecessary things, spend money on expensive leisure activities and live beyond their means. They take out loans only in extreme cases and feel uncomfortable doing so. They strive with all their might for financial stability and independence.
- Ability to value time. Pragmatists realized the value of time in childhood and learned to manage it wisely. They always carefully plan their daily routine and spend every minute to their advantage. They also respect other people's time, not allowing themselves to distract people from important matters.
- Freedom from other people's influence. It is impossible to impose ideas, values, and moral principles on a pragmatist. He himself forms them on the basis of life experience and acquired knowledge. He easily recognizes manipulation and resists it.
- Strategic thinking. A pragmatist's thoughts are focused on the future. He knows that if he works hard now, he will get the life he dreams of. He easily gives up immediate pleasures in the name of future results.
- High level of self-control. The pragmatist has excellent control over his emotions. He will think 10 times before expressing them openly. In this matter, he is also guided by considerations of personal gain. If in a certain situation emotionality plays into his hands, he will not restrain the expression of feelings, and vice versa.
We've sorted out the pros, now let's turn to the cons.
- Greed. When frugality gets out of hand, it turns into greed. It happens that a pragmatist feels sorry for spending money even on necessary things. He tries to save on everything and save the money he saves.
- Excessive prudence. It's the same story with rationality. Sometimes it turns into cold calculation. A person completely suppresses his feelings and relies only on reason. Even in situations where this is inappropriate - when choosing a love partner, for example.
- Cynicism and criticality towards others. Pragmatists often look down on other people. They are irritated by people's lack of restraint and inconsistency. What ordinary citizens live with seems to pragmatists to be meaningless vanity.
- Lack of excitement and adventurism. Pragmatists do not know what it means to be “on fire with an idea.” If they do not see an opportunity to benefit from their actions, then they will not perform them. Because of this, they miss out on many opportunities.
- Emotional coldness. People close to pragmatists complain about their isolation and coldness. They don’t want to put things off to communicate with family, they rarely give gifts, and they are stingy with pleasant words. In fact, this impression is wrong. But it still has a negative impact on relationships with people.
- Pettiness. Pragmatists can be meticulous bores. What an ordinary person will not notice or quickly forget, a pragmatist will ruminate in his head. For example, he can remember a friend that he borrowed 100 rubles from him in the canteen a month ago and ask him to return the debt.
- The desire to benefit from everything. Sometimes pragmatists seriously go too far and begin to behave inappropriately. For example, in an effort to monetize their knowledge and skills, they begin to ask friends for money for advice or some minor help.
How your interlocutor greets you
A strong handshake indicates an extroverted person who likes to clearly express his feelings. If someone, greeting you, puts his hand on your shoulder, then this is a sign that he loves or is trying to manipulate you. If the other person grabs your palm with both hands, then this is a sign that he needs something from you, which he will tell you later, or that he has something important to tell you.