Disappointment is a natural reaction of the human psyche when life does not go according to the desired or planned scenario. Any reason, even a minor one, can cause disappointment: disagreements with colleagues, unsuccessful romantic relationships. And even more so when plans collapse or efforts do not bring results.
Destroyed plans spoil people's mood for a long time, unsettle them, and provoke depression.
Few people know how to effectively deal with this feeling. Here are some tips on how to deal with disappointment and move from a bad streak to a white one.
Where do the black streaks in life come from?
A person’s life depends not only on his personal efforts, but also on external influences. For example, a salary was delayed - a person worked regularly all month, but is sitting without money. Here's a black streak for you.
And then troubles pile up like a snowball. When depressed, people make wrong decisions, become distracted, and inattentive. They make mistakes, and as a result - major and minor troubles.
It is important to remember that getting into a black streak is much easier than getting out of it.
What to do?
A woman needs to know that disappointment causes the development of stressful conditions, apathy, anxiety, and decreased self-esteem. All these negative feelings have a bad impact on your overall health; wrinkles and dark circles appear under the eyes.
To survive frustration and begin to enjoy the little things, psychologists recommend adhering to the following rules:
- Think about the problem. It is not recommended to fall into a panic state until the causes of the situation are discovered. Psychologists strongly advise that you first study the problem, look for reasons for overcoming it yourself, or consult with a loved one.
- Get rid of emotions. Accumulating anger and resentment is fraught with a huge scandal and a loud break in relationships. You can avoid such consequences if you find a good way to release negative emotions. Physical activity helps well - fitness, morning jogging, gymnastics.
- Idealization of a man. Every person has disadvantages, regardless of gender, race, or age. You cannot make your partner ideal, because if the relationship breaks up it will be very difficult.
- Sincere conversation. A good habit of happy families, which helps eliminate misunderstandings and problems. By talking to each other, people find solutions to many problems, because they think about them together, and not alone.
- Compromise. Both spouses must give in, then problems will be resolved amicably, and the family will become stronger. You need to learn to find a middle ground in relationships at the very beginning, so that family ties and the birth of a child do not become a burden.
- Self-love. Selfless love for a partner is good, but you cannot deify him. A woman must love herself, her appearance, her body, and then she can easily endure even parting with a man, stress and depression will bypass her.
Why don't all people strive to get out of the black streak?
No matter how strange it may sound, not all people strive to quickly get out of the black streak. There are several reasons.
- The sympathy of others. We are always pleased when people give attention, show interest, and sometimes even help.
- There is always a topic for discussion. Most of us are people who like to talk about problems.
- Possible concessions. For example, a person did not receive his salary on time, was late for work and explained that he had no money for travel.
However, we should remember: in this state we often attract even greater troubles. Against their background, attention, sympathy and a topic of conversation are rather dubious benefits.
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
The life around us gives many reasons for disappointment. Dreams are shattered, plans crumble under the pressure of daily problems, and in the end it begins to seem that disappointments and failures are a normal state of our lives.
Disappointment is a feeling of complete helplessness when you realize that you are not in control of your circumstances, but they are in control of you.
Symptoms of disappointment are easy to notice in the behavior of other people, but much more difficult to notice in your own life .
For example, at an early stage an anxious feeling appears, you begin to get nervous, and anxiety appears.
These are the first symptoms on the road to disappointment, and they are a signal to correct our reaction to the situation. During difficult periods, the desire to escape from a critical situation can lead to bitterness, resentment, withdrawal from reality, or loss of faith in the future. When this happens, it is important to properly evaluate our bitter experience of disappointment. No matter how hard it is, you need to pull yourself together and rise above the circumstances and stop feeling sorry for yourself. It is very important that any life experience makes us stronger, tempers us, and not vice versa.
Properly resolved personal disappointments can become stepping stones to personal growth, the setting of more realistic goals, and a deeper understanding of other people. What to do if you lost your job
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
Different situations can happen in life. Almost no one is immune from job loss. This is a life situation that takes place. If this happened to you, then do not despair and become despondent. Use the period while you are not working as productively as possible for yourself and your rest. To make it easier to cope with a bad mood, we suggest considering the main psychological conditions that arise during this period and how you can cope with them.
- Dejection and disappointment.
You may ruminate about the reasons for leaving, engage in self-flagellation, or feel angry, but none of these states are beneficial for you. These are unproductive states facing the past. Focus on achieving new goals that will only lead you to good things. - A feeling of inadequacy
and lack of faith in one’s own strength. This condition often occurs if you have been fired. But is work the only place where you can realize yourself? Don't limit your life only to your professional sphere. - Feelings of helplessness and passivity.
After being fired or laid off, many describe their uselessness and helplessness. Don't give up! If you didn’t manage to realize yourself in one area, then you should try to do it in another. - Pointless actions.
For many who have lost their jobs, it is typical to carry out absolutely incomprehensible activities that take energy and time, but do not have any result. There is no need to try to “do anything.” Set yourself specific goals and objectives to achieve them. - Pessimism
does not allow you to normally search for a new job and ways to realize it, so there is no need to give vent to this feeling. Set yourself up for success and that all your planned goals will be achieved.
If you lose your job, you shouldn’t get angry and offended by the whole world around you. The people around you have nothing to do with the fact that you were fired. And you are not the only one in such an unpleasant situation. Treat people kindly. This will not only give you pleasure, but will also make receiving help from other people much more realistic
What to do if you had to break up
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
Breakups are an inevitable part of life. It is very difficult to recover after breakups or divorces. Some never manage to fully restore their mental strength, and they carry the pain within themselves for the rest of their lives, while others “close themselves off” altogether, fearing new separations and new pain. So, how can you get over a breakup easier?
- Give yourself time to heal
. Don't push yourself, don't rush - it may take quite a lot of time. There is nothing wrong with tears and bitter memories, but don’t let them turn you into a hermit who constantly sits at home and grieves over unfulfilled hopes. - Try to keep yourself busy with something all the time.
There should not be a minute of free time in your daily schedule. In order to survive a breakup, anything will do: another job, volunteering, a favorite activity. - Make an effort and start meeting new people
. Take a walk in the park, go to a concert, a movie, a wedding. Let your social circle expand - this will give you the opportunity to spend time with new people. - Seek help from professionals.
There is no shame in seeing a psychologist or psychotherapist. - Surround yourself with family and friends.
If your relationships with family and friends have suffered significantly, now is the best time to restore old connections. - Focus on yourself
. If previously most of the energy went into the furnace of relationships, now is the time to focus exclusively on yourself. - Strengthen yourself spiritually.
For some, visiting a mosque, talking with a friend, or getting help from a psychologist helps. Communication should benefit you, and not aggravate your condition. Remember this!
How to cope if you are disappointed in people
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
The feeling of disappointment always leaves behind a bitterness of emptiness - because that part of the consciousness where our ideas, hopes and dreams were stored is suddenly replaced by a hole into which resentment, a feeling of helplessness and despair seep. The biggest disappointment is, as a rule, our biggest misconceptions. In our dreams we climb too high, and falling certainly hurts. How to deal with disappointment in people?
- Stop idealizing people and events
. Most of the disappointments come from this habit. - Talk and listen.
How much disappointment in people is due precisely to the fact that we do not know how to speak and, most importantly, listen. Be respectful of other people's thoughts and feelings, communicate what you expect from them, and listen carefully to their response. Don't replace their answers with the attitudes that were already in your head. Listen - and you won't be disappointed. - Give others the right to be different from you
. Realize that a different way of thinking does not mean “wrong.” - Complete disappointment is fraught with deep depression
. Distract yourself by setting new goals and opportunities. Again, analyzing your own thoughts will help with this. For example, having realized that you are disappointed in a friend, you should not project the emotion onto the concept of friendship as a whole. - Trust people and life.
If you want something, don't expect it from others, but trust them. By limiting yourself in trust, you make your life poorer
What to do if you are betrayed by a loved one
How to Deal with Your Deepest Disappointment
Betrayal can be different: someone breaks a promise to you, or maybe a friend spilled your secrets to strangers, or a loved one lost your trust, family members did not support you when you were having difficulties - the list of possible betrayal options can be endless. But the most severe pain comes from the betrayal of loved ones. What do you need to do to survive betrayal? And is it possible to restore faith in future relationships?
- Think.
Try to find out all the details in order to understand what exactly and how led to the betrayal. When you sort everything out in your head, it will be easier for you to decide what to do next. Try to find out if this is actually true. Maybe this is an accidental absurdity, and there was no betrayal at all. - Sorry
. Don't let the pain of betrayal take over you. Don't drown yourself in your grievances and worries. What happened cannot be changed, and the accumulated anger will slowly destroy you. So, no matter how difficult it is, forgive me. Sometimes forgiveness is the most terrible weapon against offenders. - Find inspiration
. Approach your condition constructively: do what makes you feel better, no matter how pointless it may seem to you, do it if it makes you feel better. Look for something that will lift your spirits and make you want to move on. - Face your fears.
Take risks, build new relationships, despite your fears. Avoid loneliness during the period when you are experiencing betrayal. Talk to people you trust, don't isolate yourself. - Personal development
. Focus on developing further: take care of your education, career, and so on. - Think about the future.
Make plans that motivate and inspire you. You still have a sea of events and achievements ahead. Think carefully about your future, about old and new relationships. - Patience.
When experiencing betrayal, be patient: the pain will not go away as quickly as you want. Treat yourself patiently, do not scold yourself for bouts of despondency, but methodically pull yourself out of them. - Think
and analyze your actions towards this person. Perhaps you yourself hurt him and did not notice it. We don’t notice our mistakes, because in such cases it hurts not us, but the other person. Then, probably, you shouldn’t be offended by him.
It is difficult to survive the betrayal of a loved one. But we must remember that life does not stand still. We change, the world around us changes. And no matter how hard it is, the pain will subside, you just need to wait a little. And then life will find its colors again, you will be happy again.
Alina Matyeva
With love COLOR BLOCKING @colorblocking_ru