How to become an extrovert if you are an introvert, and vice versa: useful tips

  • September 15, 2018
  • Psychology of thinking
  • Raisa Bogacheva

Each of us is unique. However, many people share the same personality traits. And, for example, one person can have traits of both an extrovert and an introvert. Most often, one of these qualities predominates in a person. Can an introvert become an extrovert? The answer to this question follows.

How to become an extrovert if you are an introvert?

Often a person can become an introvert for a while based on some events in his life, the same thing happens with an extrovert. Everything can depend on the mood or the people around you. Many introverts believe that they are different from other people, that life is much more difficult for them. There is also a common myth that introverts hate people and avoid interacting with them. In fact, such statements are far from the truth. In this article, we’ll look at simple tips on how to slightly change your character and acquire new qualities for yourself, and also learn about the advantages and disadvantages of introverts and extroverts.

Pros of each type

Extroverts have an easier time living in society; this is their main and undeniable advantage. For them, their type of temperament is beneficial for the following reasons:

  1. They can be leaders who will be followed.
  2. Extroverts find it easy to speak in front of large numbers of people.
  3. They are the center of attention, so they will always find someone to talk to.
  4. Extroverts have a lot of friends and acquaintances, they know who to turn to in difficult times and with whom they can have fun.
  5. People with this type of temperament are not afraid to take risks, so many opportunities open up for them in choosing professions. They can be leaders.

An introvert finds it easier and more pleasant to be with himself; his advantage is that he can easily and happily endure loneliness. This type of temperament also has a number of advantages:

  1. Introverts are non-conflicting.
  2. These people are calmer and more balanced, which helps them endure life’s troubles much easier.
  3. They accept themselves and other people as they are, without trying to fix the whole world.
  4. Introverts find their resource in self-development.
  5. It is important for them to be in harmony with themselves, and not with the whole world (which is very reasonable, because you cannot please everyone).

Introverts

Identifying an introvert is not that easy. Very often, such people put on an extrovert mask in order to simply appear sociable, but as a rule they say little in large companies. Many people think that such people do not like people and resist communication. But this is not true. Introverts carefully choose their social circle and love to talk about topics that interest them.

Introverts love solitude. This definitely won't scare them. They can calmly be alone and pay great attention to their inner state. They do not like noisy places with a lot of people. Introverts love small social circles and quiet places to relax. They quickly get tired of the hustle and bustle and feel emotionally exhausted.

This is why people with such qualities spend more time alone, thus restoring their emotional state. They choose a job where there are few people, or get a job with friends. They often plan everything in advance and love predictability; they schedule their day completely.

At first

Extrovert – directed from within, active from the outside.

Introvert – directed inward, passive from the outside.

These are very brief characteristics, do not find fault.

We are all different: different appearance, character type, upbringing, hobbies, habits, intelligence... And it is almost impossible to say that “you are an extrovert, and you are an introvert.” Believe me, a tired, overworked extrovert is much more passive than a rested, fresh introvert. Also in one situation, the extrovert fades away like a match, and the introvert will show all the power of a still pool. You've probably noticed people who seem to be so extroverted and super active, but when it comes to a specific stressful task, they wither before our eyes. This is imaginary extroversion - it is important to take this into account. And vice versa, if you are considered quiet and calm, but you are attracted by extreme sports, the thirst for success, social activity, to be always and everywhere, but definitely not to be in yourself - then this is imaginary introversion. In these situations, you can change yourself.

Let's get down to the real differences between an Extrovert.

Behavior with others

Introverts do not like empty chatter, prefer to discuss only important points and do not pay much attention to strangers. From the outside it may look arrogant, but introverts are very simple by nature. They just choose their social circle carefully. Such people look like hermits.

An introvert may indeed be reserved, but he has a very rich inner world. These are the people who direct their energy inside themselves and practically do not show their emotions in front of strangers. However, among friends, these are most often very sociable people who can tell interesting and funny stories. They perceive this or that situation in life more acutely, which means they worry more than extroverts. But since they don’t show it outwardly, those around them don’t try to support them.

Extroverts

Now let's talk about extroverts. This is the complete opposite of introverts - very active and sociable people. They love to be in large companies and attract attention. They love making new acquaintances and do not see any obstacles to this. They find a common language with almost every person and make friends very easily.

Extroverts become mentally exhausted if they are alone for a long time, without communication. They love to work in a large team, share their experience and make new acquaintances. Such people can usually communicate all day long. Leaving the workplace, they do not feel morally tired; they can still meet with friends and spend the evening in a noisy company. Extroverts are always looking for adventure and crave innovation in their lives.

Choose what you like

You need to learn to live the way you yourself want, and not the way it is accepted in society. Don't be afraid to turn down meetings if you're not interested. Do you like spending holidays at home more than going to a restaurant with a crowd? So celebrate them at home. You need to be able to live for yourself, and not for the world around you, so that you don’t have to look for how to recover after a noisy company. Choose a job where you don't need to interact with other people often, this will give you more strength to develop.

Comfort zone

First you need to understand that their life is some kind of large comfort zone. No unnecessary acquaintances, new adventures, no spontaneity. You need to understand that some things in life cannot be familiar and it is worth, for example, making new friends or finding a new hobby that can help you develop.

The main thing is not to overdo it. It's important to start small. If, for example, in the morning an introvert likes to drink coffee and read a book alone, you should not immediately go to work in the morning and start meeting people passing by. It is better to replace morning reading with a run and say hello to your neighbor when you meet. You can read a book in the evening.

More seriousness

The next way to become more self-confident is to take responsibility. If at work an introvert politely refuses to perform some important task or raise funds for a colleague’s birthday, then it’s worth trying yourself in this matter. By performing some unusual tasks, you can become more confident and earn the respect of your colleagues.

It is important to understand that leaving your comfort zone may not make you feel very good. But that's the goal. You need to try yourself in something new and gradually get used to it.

It was natural! A little about chemistry!

Everything here is both simple and complex: psychostimulants. Moreover, true introverts need small dosages. After all, they react more sharply to norepinephrine. And if an extrovert easily dances in a club, but rather jumps with his arms and legs, then a true introvert will get a blood pressure of 170 and a pulse of 120, first blush and then turn pale, not to mention in parachutes or other extreme sports.

To better understand what psychostimulants are, we recommend the issue “Legal Amphetamine Replacements” and “Doping in E-Sports”. Adaptogens that may also work include Leuzea, Eleutherococcus, and Schisandra. Of course, you need to read the contraindications.

Unpredictability

Another way to become an extrovert is to do spontaneous things. There is no need to immediately buy tickets and fly to the island. You can, for example, invite a friend to go for a walk and not plan the place of the walk, but just go where you want. Or surprise your loved one, improvise. Break away from your plan for the day and do something that you have really wanted for a long time.

For girls, changing their hairstyle is suitable; such actions sometimes change their lives radically. For guys, a radical wardrobe change can be effective. Sometimes your mood and outlook on life also depend on your clothes.

Before an important meeting, you can think through the dialogue in advance and be prepared for any outcome. This will help you worry less and not say stupid things, and behave confidently. You can read books about developing social skills. People think that extroverts communicate better with other people and are more sociable than introverts. But this is not true.

An introvert who gets used to a person can talk to him for hours on end. Therefore, at a party or in a large company at work, you can chat with at least one or two people on interesting topics. Don't worry that they might not be interested. As mentioned above, you can come up with a dialogue in your head in advance so as not to feel insecure. Such a spontaneous conversation with a stranger can be the beginning of a new strong friendship.

Useful advice from a psychologist

What to do if you are an introvert, but want to be an extrovert? Psychologists have several methods to help make the possible transition. But you should know that it is not possible to completely change a person’s disposition. It will take many years of work to achieve a positive trend. It is believed that there are no pure species in nature, so it is just as possible to make a partial transition from an extrovert to an introvert, as well as vice versa. It is difficult to change radically on your own, but a professional psychologist will always help you find the most effective ways that will allow you to change quickly and less painfully.

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More sincerity

Be sincere with other people. Tell them directly that you are a little shy and indecisive, which is why it is difficult for you to carry on a conversation with a stranger. This will relieve tension; sincerity can be adequately appreciated by another person. Ask other people to talk about themselves more when talking, this will increase loyalty to you. Visit places where you can meet interesting people. Locations similar to your interests are perfect. When meeting a new person, there will be even more topics to talk about.

Before going out with friends, you can ask them to bring strangers with them. This will increase the chance of meeting new people and overcoming self-doubt.

Be more restrained

Extroverts, in turn, have a lot to learn from introverts. For example, how to drown out your emotions in time. Learn to understand where they should be shown and where not. Overly emotional people are not always pleasant in company; in some cases it is better to just remain silent. You need to be able to control your social circle and be able to say “no” where necessary. Many psychologists say that it is impossible to change an extrovert, but it’s worth a try.

You need to try to focus on your energy and direct it inside yourself. Think about something important, plan your future and be more serious. In large companies, don’t be an upstart and don’t try to attract attention only to yourself. Most often it looks vulgar and intrusive. It's better to talk about yourself when asked. You should attract attention with interesting stories and tact. Among the many acquaintances, there are not very good people who may not have the same interests.

Extroverts often boast about their many acquaintances, but there are hardly any real friends among them. Both extroverts and introverts have their pros and cons. It is important to monitor your emotions, not give in to them and at the same time live life to the fullest, enjoy every day you live.

Know how to find compromises

It often happens that two different types of people decide to create a couple. In this case, frequent misunderstandings and, as a result, resentment may arise. Simply because the needs are different. You need to be able to find a compromise and an optimal solution in everything that concerns these differences. For example, spend your free time in different ways: some weekends at home with a movie, others - outdoors with a bunch of friends. This way you can meet each other's needs without causing yourself too much discomfort.

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