Incredible facts
An insecure man is a headache for any woman.
Many women whose relationships started out great eventually discovered that their man was completely insecure.
Such a man not only begins to squeeze you into his vice over time, but also threatens your mental well-being.
Of course, it's nice when your boyfriend constantly pays attention to you, but if his love begins to suffocate you, the relationship can turn into a complete nightmare.
There are several signs that allow you to recognize an insecure and overly complex man.
Causes
Any effect must have a cause. If a man is unsure of himself, it means that someone inspired him that such behavior is considered normal. Why is a man unsure of himself? Here are the main reasons:
- Parental overprotection. The boy grew up under the strict control of his mother and never made decisions on his own.
- Strict parents. If in childhood a mother scolds a boy for any offense, in adulthood the person will not take the initiative, since he will know that she is punishable.
- Constant criticism. Unfounded criticism from parents and teachers could seriously affect a child's self-esteem, reducing it to zero.
- Narrow social circle. The less a person communicates with people, the less friendly he is. Closed individuals are more likely than others to suffer from low self-esteem.
Collecting anamnesis or why is it like this?
Of course, we all come from childhood. Upbringing in a family, the first successful or unsuccessful experience of making an independent decision, the first blow to the nose... Receive it, sign it, now it’s all yours.
The relationship between mother and child determines the degree of self-confidence of the future man. For a child, a mother is the image of the world. If a mother accepts a child and gives him warmth and joy from the first days of life, then, as he grows up, the boy will take the feeling of security and comfort into adulthood.
An overly caring or despotic mother can cause a number of complexes and defensive behavior patterns, which the wife will have to fight.
Attention to appearance
This may surprise some, but insecure men try to look very stylish. A person wants to show his own individuality with his appearance. The person acts like a peacock, which opens its beautiful tail in front of the females.
Men with low self-esteem follow fashion, decorate their bodies with tattoos and have trendy haircuts. External gloss helps them feel important. But behind the outer shell hides an insecure person. A person with high self-esteem will not attach much importance to clothing. He will dress neatly and tastefully, but he will not blindly follow all fashion trends.
Fear of expressing your opinion
The psychology of an insecure man is this: I won’t say anything, no one needs to know what I’m thinking about. Guys with low self-esteem are never the life of the party. They look like gray mice that hide behind the backs of the merry fellows. They often do not have their own opinion. They can think whatever they want, but they will speak out in the way that is customary to do in their society. Such guys will not go against the system and defend their interests. They will accept any development of events, as long as they are not personally touched or forced to change anything or argue with someone.
Traits of an insecure man
So many epithets have been given to them - the mighty of this world, but even among them there are those who somewhat do not correspond to the proud “name”. How do you understand that this is a man who is insecure and is it worth trying to re-educate him?
Let's start from the end
Whatever your companion is, do not try to act as a mother or nanny. Before you is an adult, with an established character and “tamed cockroaches” for a long time. Why try to change it, adjust it to suit yourself and break a system in which a person is simply comfortable living?
Believe me, for everyone there is a mate who will accept him with all his fears, concerns, inability to stand up for himself and other traits that are atypical for a man.
If it is a priori unacceptable for you to communicate with this type of man, then try to recognize them at the initial stages of communication, and successfully complete it without causing discomfort to yourself or him.
Character of an insecure man
1. He differs from his “compatriots” in appearance: he is, more often than not, a nondescript guy, with a very modest appearance, thin (or, on the contrary, excessively obese).
Dressed not fashionably, more often than not, not at all in shape. Overall, it looks pretty shabby. Although there are exceptions to any rule, appearance is not the most reliable indicator.
2. Such men have real problems in terms of oratory.
Most often, they are completely unsuited to dialogue: not verbally, not in writing. At the moment when they want to express their thoughts, put them into beautiful words, only platitudes come to mind - which are issued at that moment.
Again: this point also does not exclude the presence of self-doubt in guys with a well-spoken tongue. Sometimes men try to compensate for their insecurity with talkativeness and feigned cheerfulness.
3. These men do not like to take responsibility; it is difficult for them to take basic steps that fall on men’s shoulders when they try to charm a lady.
Everything will be difficult: both the acquaintance itself and the development of relationships. Insecure men are more likely to wait for initiative from a woman.
4. Most likely, he will lie to you from the very first minutes of communication.
In order to present himself in a favorable light, he will have to somewhat distort the facts about himself, for the better, as it seems to him.
5. From a man who suffers from insecurity, you may never hear the most important words.
And at hints of romance and other tenderness, he will blush like a boy. Actually, uncertainty is a problem of an immature personality in a physically adult man.
source
Source: //zhiznistori.com/i-takoe-byvaet/cherty-neuverennogo-v-sebe-muzhchiny.html
Closed gestures
The behavior of an insecure man is appropriate. In any society, he will try to isolate himself from people. And since it is not in his power to build physical barriers, the man will fence himself off with gestures.
Taking closed poses, crossing arms and legs, a person will demonstrate uncertainty and tightness with his whole appearance. And if inspiration suddenly hits him and he decides to tell something, then his gestures will be too constrained and angular. The viewer will not be able to notice any broad movements.
Low self-esteem
It is not surprising that an insecure person will have low self-esteem. He is too modest and shy. He is afraid to talk to a stranger, even if he needs to ask for directions. Low self-esteem does not allow a person to correctly perceive himself and his activities. Such a man will unintentionally belittle his talent and say that he is mediocrity, even if this is not the case at all. And such thoughts will ultimately lead to the fact that a person will not do his job to his full potential.
The essence of self-esteem and its importance
The question “How to increase a man’s self-esteem” is relevant at all times. To answer it, you need to figure out what it is, self-esteem? So, self-esteem is the sum of all a person’s ideas about himself, his own value both for himself personally and in relationships with other people, an assessment of himself, his qualities and feelings, advantages and disadvantages, and their open or hidden expression. Relationships in family and society, with friends and foes are built on the basis of self-esteem. It is this that helps or hinders achieving the desired results in your main activity and hobby, allows you to become a financially prosperous person or bankrupt, satisfy or not your own needs in different areas.
Unfortunately, there is often an undeniable connection between self-esteem and the opinions of loved ones or strangers, as well as the influence of various life situations. But it is much better when a person’s opinion of himself is based solely on personal judgments about himself. This gives serious advantages:
- A man acts of his own free will, is free to choose his actions, and is independent of other people’s comments.
- The man feels protected. He is confident in himself, regardless of other people's opinions and mute.
- A man has the opportunity for development. In modern reality, constant development and self-improvement are the key to success.
Self-esteem comes in different types (distorted, adequate and mixed) and levels (high, low and normal). It should be noted that the combination of extreme options has a negative impact on a man’s life. In the case of low self-esteem, a man cannot self-actualize, is not aware of his talents and abilities, and suffers from increased anxiety and various complexes. When self-esteem is inflated, a man does not adequately perceive criticism, therefore, the opportunity to draw the necessary conclusions is closed, and the man is not capable of compromise. In addition, the sense of danger is lost.
But adequate self-esteem, unfortunately, is the least common thing. It is expressed in understanding and complete acceptance of oneself, all one’s shortcomings and advantages, and the ability to focus on positive qualities. And these are the people, according to psychologists, who should be chosen for communication and relationships. You should abstain from men who are unsure of themselves, especially from close relationships with them.
Closedness
One of the signs of an insecure man is the lack of friends. And if he has comrades, then they are few. People who are insecure cannot communicate normally with others. Strong individuals will use weak ones to achieve their goals. That's why insecure guys think they can't trust anyone. They develop such a policy not only in relation to their peers, but also in relation to the older generation.
A trouble-free person is easy to exploit and will not resent. Over time, under the pressure of society, even the most good-natured, modest guy will turn into a closed individual, gloomy and taciturn.
Signs that indicate an insecure man
An insecure man is a headache for any woman.
Many women whose relationships started out great eventually discovered that their man was completely insecure.
Such a man not only begins to squeeze you into his vice over time, but also threatens your mental well-being.
Of course, it's nice when your boyfriend constantly pays attention to you, but if his love begins to suffocate you, the relationship can turn into a complete nightmare.
There are several signs that allow you to recognize an insecure and overly complex man.
He has no friends or any interests
He never mentions his friends and doesn't date anyone except you. Outside of work, he has no interests or hobbies. He doesn't go to the gym, doesn't play any games, and doesn't do anything in his free time.
When he's not with you, he sits at home and thinks about you. Perhaps he had some hobbies and friends, but he abandoned everything to spend every minute with you.
He thinks you still have feelings for your ex
He is convinced that your feelings for your ex have not yet cooled down, even if you separated or divorced many years ago, and in relation to him you feel only pity, disgust and disappointment.
His self-doubt is so strong that he cannot find a reason and convince himself that you can love him. Therefore, the only conclusion he comes to is that you still love your ex.
He says he loves you too soon
From the very beginning of their acquaintance, he swears his eternal love to you. Although this pleases your pride, deep down you have doubts: Does he love me? After the second date?
People need time to get to know each other and for feelings of love to develop. If your new acquaintance immediately confesses his love to you, this is an alarming sign, especially when he demands reciprocal confessions from you.
He says you are everything to him
You became for him the Universe and the meaning of life. Of course, it’s nice when someone appreciates you so highly, but being the center of everything for someone is a heavy burden.
What happens when you face some obstacles in life? After all, when everything in your relationship is not so smooth, his world will simply fall apart, since you are that very world for him.
He constantly needs approval
He constantly asks you questions: “Do you love me?” and extracts compliments from you. Even your assurances of his attractiveness do not help him trust you.
Of course, we all need words of approval and want to know that we are loved, smart, talented, attractive and desirable. But if a man’s need for approval goes beyond any limits, he suffers from great self-doubt.
He is jealous of your friends
He is jealous of the time you spend with your friends. He doesn't like it when you meet your work colleagues, go shopping with your girlfriends, and God forbid you communicate with other men. He constantly calls and texts you when you are not around.
At first, when a man shows possessive manners, it’s even pleasant. You feel special and wanted. But after a while, the possessive instinct becomes so unbearable that you cannot take a single step without offending him.
He constantly threatens to break off relations with you
Such games were invented by him for only one purpose - to tie you even more to himself. You may hear phrases like: “I don’t feel wanted,” “I don’t think you love me.”
In fact, he doesn't want to end the relationship, but deep down he hopes that you will start asking him to stay. If you give in, his ego calms down for a while. If not, he takes back his words and is ready to do anything to avoid losing you.
Source: //www.navolne.life/post/priznaki-kotorye-vydayut-neuverennogo-v-sebe-muzhchinu
Doesn't want to take responsibility
A person for whom mom or dad decided everything for him since childhood will not be eager to make decisions on his own. After all, if you take responsibility for your actions, you cannot blame someone for failures. I have to admit that I made the mistake myself.
Boys who grew up under overprotection cannot even admit to themselves that they are capable of making a mistake. After all, my mother said from childhood that her son was smart and capable. And to support this legend, you need to shift the responsibility onto your neighbor. But in case of success, you need to try to win back the laurels of victory for yourself.
Don't look for solace in a new relationship
Some people believe that the way to regain self-confidence is to start a new relationship immediately after ending an old one. And this is a big mistake. The fact is that love does not come when ordered. By communicating with someone who is neither good nor bad, you can achieve the opposite effect, and besides, you can waste time that could be spent more profitably.
Experience shows us that starting a new, usually unnecessary relationship is not the best decision because we are likely to repeat the same mistakes. So give yourself time to heal and take care of yourself. Treat yourself to what you love. For example, if you like horses, join a horse club. Do affirmations, repeat to yourself the words that you would like to hear from others. Make sure that you are surrounded by exclusively positive people.
Looks up to others
The opinion of another person is very important for an indecisive person. Such people will not compare themselves today with themselves yesterday. They will compare themselves to others. And if a person looks good compared to others, then you need to continue moving in the chosen direction. A person cannot go his own way. After all, the opinions of others are very important, and an insecure man values them very much. Therefore, you need to do things that will definitely please the majority of people nearby. Men with low self-esteem will never be inherently liberal. They will live their whole lives guided by Conservative policies.
Lack of hobbies
Any normal person should be interested in something besides work. Hobbies form passion in a person and help pass away leisure time. Insecure individuals cannot find a worthy occupation for themselves and spend their leisure time watching TV series or playing computer games. Guys with low self-esteem are afraid to take on any endeavor. The fear of being judged and the fear of failure will bind their hands. In his imagination, a man may be a professional tennis player or a professional artist, but in reality he will never develop his abilities until he begins to make efforts to fulfill his dreams.
Lack of friends
People can live normally only when they communicate with others. And if an adult lives without friends, it is worth thinking about his normality. It is difficult for a closed person to make acquaintances, but nevertheless, in your 20-30 years you can find at least one person close in spirit.
Insecure men argue with their friends and significant other all the time. Such individuals complain of constant betrayal and misunderstanding on the part of others. But when such complaints are received on a regular basis, one somehow cannot believe the sincerity of the person’s words.
Relationship with a man
There is also an inverse relationship here. Not only does self-esteem affect relationships, but relationships also affect self-esteem.
When they start, you are in love with each other.
Even if you initially doubted everything, at this moment you want to forget all your fears more than ever. And if your lover behaves correctly, then you will be able to pass the barrier and look at yourself through his eyes.
The problem will not be solved in one day.
Two ways
If they are built on mutual love and respect, then the woman, encouraged and reassured by the attitude of her partner, will forget about her old fears and anxieties, will be encouraged and begin to appreciate herself.
If initially a man was in love, but did not attach due importance to his beloved’s worries, then it will not become easier for her. And if after some time a breakup occurs, she will perceive it as a heavy blow and another proof that she is unworthy of happiness.
It can even cause real depression
It doesn't matter why the breakup happened. It will end up worse than before
And here I come to the main question - how can I help myself get out?
Jealousy
One of the signs of an insecure man is jealousy. At the beginning of a relationship, a lady may even like this character trait. But over time, any girl, even a sentimental one, gets tired of constant interrogations and suspicions.
A man will demand that a woman spend as much time with him as possible. And it won’t matter to him whether his missus has agreed to spend this day with her friends or whether she would like to go shopping. He will constantly impose his company on her and therefore will be very annoying.
A man in a skirt: signs of an insecure man ⇒ Blog of Yaroslav Samoilov
You want to be behind him, like behind a stone wall. But what to do if the legendary wall turns out to be pressed cardboard?
This is how nature intended it millions of years ago: a strong partner is needed to create a family and offspring. Therefore, you are completely justifiably afraid for your future.
For a harmonious relationship, it is necessary that a man be responsible, courageous, strong and achieve his goals.
Yes, at the beginning of a relationship a man seems to be at least a demigod. And you melt from new sensations and compliments faster than the ice in his whiskey.
And the shortcomings seem so insignificant that they cannot spoil anything. And while he looks after him beautifully, what’s the point of noticing anything?
As a result, character traits and behavior patterns gradually become visible that can no longer be hidden by courtship.
He often fantasizes, is lazy, promises a lot, but does little - it is quite possible that he has something of a rogue in him. Darwin would have cried over something like this.
Therefore, even at the beginning of a relationship, I advise you to take a closer look. So that later you have no reason to shed tears.
A hundred for courage
The foundation of low self-esteem, fear of failure and unwillingness to cope with difficulties is laid in childhood. By the age of 30, a man is fully equipped with internal imbalance, if any.
To give imaginary self-confidence, he often resorts to alcohol, games, even drugs. Alternatively, he changes women like broken toothpicks.
If you meet a man who insults, humiliates or “plays” with you, know that he is healing his sick ego at the expense of you.
Are you confident? - Yes, my mother told me so
Infants are a special type of complexed men. Initially, they are looking for mothers, housewives or women with good income. Mama's boys shift responsibility onto the woman: everyday life, finances or decision-making.
At the same time, everyone is to blame for their failures - the ex, the government, bad weather. By the way, ask about his past relationships. You will hear how he was betrayed or not loved and respected enough.
A worthy man will never throw mud at his ex-woman. Due to this, only men with low self-esteem assert themselves.
Even if the candy-bouquet begins like a fairy tale, over time they will also morally (and God forbid physically!) lower their woman. As if by chance or “with the best intentions.”
Either she’s dressed wrong, her hair doesn’t suit her, she’s not smart enough, she’s so-so in bed... Think carefully, maybe the problem isn’t you at all?
Grandmother's tales
To hide his uncertainty, he will talk about his grandiose plans. How he has his eye on an apartment in the center and is planning to buy (but he doesn’t say that it’s already been 10 years).
That he plans to move to Rome (he dreamed of it since his youth, but something got in the way), or opens a big business (but his time has not come yet, so a sofa and a job from 9 to 6 suit him quite well).
Conversations and fantasies add to his status. And not only in the eyes of others, but also in your own. Oh, how he would like to be like that, but alas...
You will recognize him from a thousand, lift your rose-colored glasses and assess the situation soberly. Unconfident man:
Listens to other people's opinions
Just yesterday everything was okay, but today he’s finding fault with your undercooked cutlets - rest assured, because Aunt Sveta said so and she knows better.
And it doesn’t matter whose opinion is a priority for him - his mother, brother or friends. He is dependent and weak. Unable to make decisions on his own. This also affects your career. It is not he who controls, but him.
Doesn't take responsibility
The level of responsibility speaks of his maturity, and again, of self-confidence. If a man is afraid of difficulties, he will not be responsible for business, finances and a woman.
He will find a million excuses and reservations, and to some they will seem convincing. But the fact remains - a lot of words, little action.
Perhaps he is driven by fear of failure or laziness - it makes no difference. If you get involved with someone like that, you'll take all the trouble on yourself. Typically, typical airborne forces and women who “do it all on their own” fall for this bait.
They believe and expect that his day will come, they provide, they give loans for business - but there are no results, even in the long term. I tell you how such relationships end in the free online course Man: Honest Instructions.
Jealous
He secretly, in the most secluded corner of his soul, underestimates himself as a man. And if a woman also compares him to some Max in a Porsche or Borey with big biceps, it blows his mind.
There will be scenes of jealousy, interrogations with confessions. Another sign is discussing other men with an element of humiliation.
From the series: “Just think, I bought an apartment... If I had such parents, I wouldn’t be without an apartment either. The area is terrible! And in fact, there was once a morgue in this place!”
Loves too much
Attention, care and diminutives can also be strangled.
In the first stages of a relationship, maybe someone likes this - 1000 and 1 SMS a day “how are you,” “how are you feeling,” “how are you in the mood.” But very soon this will start to bother any self-sufficient woman.
Intrusive calls, overprotectiveness - this is an active show of how good he is. You will be surprised, but such “love” often hides a deceitful nature.
A normal man doesn’t have time for this! He sets priorities and definitely not in favor of lifelong correspondence.
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Boasts
And an insecure man promises mountains of gold, marriage and heart on the second date. He just wants to hook a woman as quickly as possible. Until you realized that he was a rogue and a windbag.
[vrez1]
A worthy man does not trumpet how wealthy he is. He doesn't talk, he does.
Talks about feelings all the time
How does an insecure man behave in a relationship? He quickly confesses his feelings to the girl and will demand confirmation of his love from the lady. The wording of the question will look like this: “Do you love me?” And the lady will respond with a statement so as not to hurt the man’s feelings. But an insecure man will want more. A simple “yes” in response to his question is not enough for him. He can talk for hours about his feelings and find out from his chosen one why she chose him over all other men. A game like this will please the guy and annoy the girl.
Attached to parents
A man who has no friends will spend a lot of time with his family. And there would seem to be nothing wrong with this, if not for the influence that the mother will have on her son.
How does an insecure man behave? He will indulge his mother, who will be his idol, in everything. The opinions of other people, even the girl he loves, will not matter to such a guy. If mom said that you need to change jobs, then it really needs to be done. If mom said that you need to break up with your chosen one, then it’s time to say goodbye to the girl.
“Which Panama hat should I wear?”
Men's indecision is in everything. It originates at the everyday level and at first, in the acute stage of falling in love, it looks touching.
You tell him: “What kind of tea will you have?” Floral, black or green? And he: “Which one would you recommend?” Whatever you drink, pour it for me.” And the happy woman is thrilled: look how she trusts! I’m ready to hand over fate, eat and drink from her hands...
But gradually the intensity of feelings decreases, everyday life and routine rise to their full height. And touching is replaced by irritation. You tell him: “Buy ketchup at the store.” He goes on a mission and a minute later he calls from the store.
Confused, as if not a grown man, but a five-year-old boy whom his mother lost in the supermarket. A monologue sounds: “Which ketchup should I take? Garlic, savory or sweet? In glass or plastic? What about the volume? And the manufacturer?
At first you give constructive advice, but when history repeats itself non-stop, you growl into the phone: “This is what’s right in front of you on the shelf, then take it!”
And it will always be like this – creating problems out of the blue and “consulting” on nonsense. Should you take your swimming trunks with you on vacation? One or two? How many socks? And the cap – with an anchor or just a light one?
If there are no children in a couple, if the spouse does not get tired of exhausting work and generally has a huge reserve of strength, then you can live. And even happily, if the lady has no nerves at all - for no reason.
She barked at him about the cap, gave him a “tseu” before going to the store - the flight was normal. However, how many women are as strong and calm as a boa constrictor? Same thing.
An indecisive husband in family life is something between a burden and an enterprising but stupid teenager: you can entrust something, but you will have to sweat to instruct and control him.
And sometimes the illusion that he is mocking is infuriating. Well, an adult cannot get confused in three types of store-bought bread! And it seems as if he is deliberately tormenting, pretending to be small, “acting out” an unhappy childhood.
At such moments, everything you read about “learned helplessness” comes to mind - and in some ways this is true. The more you patronize and instruct, the deeper he falls into childhood: some kind of “Benjamin Button story” in reality.
Living someone else's life
A person who is insecure will be afraid of his true desires. He will postpone the implementation of his ideas for a future that will never come. A man will work where he will be paid well for his activities. Moreover, he may not even receive much satisfaction from his work. But he will have a stable income, which is so revered by society.
An insecure man will not have the strength to win the girl he loves. Therefore, he will start a family with an available woman who will reciprocate. Such a life will burden a person, but he will never find the strength to change anything in himself.
How to raise a future man?
Mom loves the child just like that, dad loves him for something. The role of the father in shaping the character of a future man can hardly be overestimated. The image of a strong man with the right to have the last word must be imprinted in the boy’s mind. If a man does not enjoy authority in the family, it is difficult to expect that, as he grows up, the boy will adhere to a different behavior strategy.
In the absence of the father, his role can be replaced by any male authority figure. Grandfather, uncle, teacher or karate section coach... someone is needed from whom the boy can follow an example.
Envy
A person who cannot achieve much will be jealous of others. He will also want to buy a new car or a new house. But a low-paid, boring job won’t allow you to buy the things you want. A person who lacks self-confidence will not think about changing his place of service. Indeed, in his picture of the world, stability is the key to success.
How to deal with an insecure man? Don't give him a reason to be jealous. There is no need to remain silent about successes, but you need to talk about them as something completely natural and ordinary. Then the person will not react violently to your words.
Quick ways to gain self-confidence
Gaining confidence and healthy self-esteem is a long process that requires persistence and a desire to change. But what if determination, courage and firmness are needed not today, tomorrow?
There are methods that help you believe in yourself in a short time. Let's go from the easiest (can be applied here and now) to the more complex (will take 2-3 days):
Confidence on a physical level
Portray confidence: shoulders back, head higher, back straighter, proud gait, face expresses calm. Your body should speak for you that you know your worth. Now look in the mirror - this is what a confident person looks like.
And don't forget about the smile! Even if you don’t feel like it, smile anyway, and then you can feel a surge of energy.
Speak measuredly, slowly and always loudly. Don't mumble, but express yourself clearly and clearly. If you feel that you don’t understand the issue and are afraid to say something out of place, try to change the topic of conversation.
New environment, new “me”
Clean your room, or better yet, the entire apartment. Rearrange and replace bedding. Feel how everything is changing for the better.
Are there any gifts left from your exes? In the trash! A little souvenir from the resort where you poisoned yourself? Throw it away and don't regret it!
And after updating your place of residence, change yourself. Get a new haircut, buy clothes in an unusual color, change your perfume, or wear an accessory that is atypical for you.
More entries
Keep a diary and write in it what good things happened during the day. In the evening, develop a plan for tomorrow and implement it on time. Be sure to mark what you accomplished.
Make a list of your achievements. Post the checklist in a visible place and add something new every day. Let it be a small thing: “helped a neighbor carry her bag,” “walked 8 kilometers,” “got up half an hour earlier.”
Praise yourself for each completed point of the plan and for each new achievement.
“Thank you” and “please”
Accept compliments with gratitude. Don't brush them off, don't devalue them, and don't start talking about your shortcomings in response. Smile sincerely and say thank you. Believe that what is said is the truth and not flattery.
Learn not only to accept compliments, but also to give them. Sometimes it's even more difficult. Try to say something kind to a loved one, be sure to be sincere. And you will be pleased too.
Talk to a stranger. Offer your help or ask for help. Even a banal “what time is it” will be enough. During the dialogue, do not lower your head. Look into the eyes of your interlocutor.
Towards positivity through negativity
Draw your fears. What would they look like? In the form of a person, an animal or an incomprehensible substance? What color and size are they? Look carefully at the pictures. What do you feel?
If you are going somewhere and are afraid of the upcoming event, close your eyes and imagine the worst case scenario. What's the worst that could happen?
After such fantasies, fear will gradually begin to go away, everything will seem not so hopeless. Courage and determination will appear. Read more about this topic in the article “How to become brave.”
Old plans
No more hiding your to-do list in the closet. Take the burden of unfulfilled plans off your shoulders.
Have you always wanted to go to your aunt in Saratov? Buy a ticket and go! Have you dreamed of going to a spa? So don't sit still. All in your hands.
Fighting complexes
15 signs of an insecure man were described above. But nothing in life is permanent, and that's good news for guys who want to change themselves. If you work on yourself and your character every day, you can completely rebuild your personality. If a person lacks strength, family and friends can come to the rescue.
How to help a man who lacks self-confidence? Very simple:
- compliment him;
- raise your self-esteem in every possible way;
- admire the activity;
- help me find a hobby;
- help get rid of excessive modesty;
- teach him to follow his gestures and not close himself off from the world.
Have it my way?
Once you've moved on and everything seems to be falling into place, your work doesn't stop.
Now it's important to maintain his newfound confidence
- Focus on his qualities. Develop in a man those qualities that will help him achieve the desired result. Developing does not mean “criticizing”. There is no need to set too difficult tasks for him.
- Forget about comparisons. “But my husband bought tours to Bali from Alenka...” Who are you building a relationship with? With your husband or with someone else? Such comparisons, on the contrary, only make the situation worse. Better compliment him, admire him and thank him.
- Support. As soon as he sets a new goal, you must reinforce it with your support. Offer your help and be there for him.
And the most important thing is not to model him into what you want, but to help him become what he himself wants to be.