Slava Profina 06/20/2018 no comments
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Most people perceive a wedding as an important event. Some are looking forward to it, others with calm confidence. But there are also those whom the mere thought of an upcoming wedding leads to a state of panic. In medicine, wedding phobia, as well as fear of marriage or being married, is in principle classified as gamophobia. People suffering from this type of disorder usually do not marry if they cannot get rid of the fear.
What is mental sexual immaturity in a man?
Psychosexual immaturity in adult men is associated with the complex mechanisms of family life (excessive care of the mother, spinelessness of the father, lack of brothers and sisters), with the increasing influence of women in modern society.
In the daily life of the family, sons are freed from any work or responsibilities except study. They get used to the dominant role of the mother in the family. The mother makes all the main decisions, and the father plays secondary roles. A son's emotional dependence on his mother can sometimes lead to serious disturbances in his psychosexual development. The most common are: delayed sexual initiation, gamophobia, imagining the wife as a mother and contrasting the wife with the mother, incest.
Detailed information on topics: impotence, prostatitis, potency, early ejaculation, frigidity.
Pre-wedding panic among brides
Sometimes the media talks about how brides run away at the most crucial moment, although there were no signs of panic before. This refutes the established myth that it is not difficult to identify a frightened bride. In fact, there are signs of fear of marriage, but ignorant people take them for granted. Psychologists advise paying attention to the following behavioral features:
- Sudden sentimentality. It manifests itself in relation to the person who proposed, although before that the woman had a negative attitude towards him. A sudden change is a sign of phobic fear, which a woman cannot control and tries to drown out.
- Nervous laughter, unbridled fun. Inappropriate expression of feelings is another alarming symptom. With severe fear, some begin to experience attacks of so-called hysterical laughter. At this time, a woman may begin to drink alcohol, although she has not done this before, invite her friends to entertainment venues, and so on.
- Watching films on a certain topic. So, if the future wife began to watch the movie “The Runaway Bride”, although she was previously fond of documentaries, you should be wary. It also wouldn’t hurt to call her for a conversation, but carefully so as not to aggravate the situation.
- The same questions and requests. It is common for a panicking bride to ask her future husband to confess his love to her. Moreover, the request can be made several times a day. The chosen one is asked various questions, which boil down to one thing: a woman or girl wants to gain confidence that she is loved and needed.
- Confidence in unfavorable developments. This is the most difficult case. The fear is very strong, and the bride seems to reassure herself that the marriage will not last long. “We’ll get divorced anyway,” she says, and for herself this means that she won’t have to endure the horror for long.
Excitement before a wedding is a natural process, but when it crosses certain boundaries, a person begins to behave strangely. If a man most often breaks off a relationship, then a woman, due to traditions and moral principles, is not always able to do this. And since fear does not go away, it will manifest itself in the most unexpected ways.
Psychological connection between a man and his mother, love for his son
The psychological connection connecting a man with his mother and her strong love for her son lead to delayed sexual initiation, which manifests itself in rare contacts with peers. And those contacts that do occur occur under the watchful control of the mother. She carefully selects her son’s circle of acquaintances and warns against making acquaintances with women. His mother tells him about treacherous women who have only one thought on their minds - getting pregnant and getting married. Mistrust and fear of them develop. At the same time, the mother guarantees him a feeling of security during acquaintances and contacts with the opposite sex. Delayed sexual initiation is postponed until a feeling of confidence is gained when communicating with women, that is, until the partner is recognized as a mother. This period can last for a long time, often ending in the formation of a syndrome of anxious anticipation of failure.
Fear of women, gamophobia, fear of marriage, fear of wedding
A stronger state of fear of women and girls can lead to a serious pathology - gamophobia , that is, fear of marriage (fear of marriage). The son suspects all the women around him of having hidden plans - to catch a man in order to get married, start a family at the man’s expense, ignoring him as a person. This leads to the formation of the psychological state of an old avid bachelor. Often the mother continues to look after such a man, helping to run the household, giving him the opportunity to live without restrictions and obligations. The question of marriage comes up only when the son loses his mother, or she herself begins to need care.
Characteristics of a phobia
Translated from Greek, "gamos" means "marriage". Gamophobia is an irrational fear of official marriage and everything connected with it. Fear of marriage can haunt a person all the time or only manifest itself when others start talking about the frightening act.
It may seem that this type of phobia is inherent in men, because usually they are presented as victims, and women act as insidious hunters of other people's property. In practice, anything goes. Among the fair sex there are also many who suffer from gamophobia. One of the reasons for the development of phobic fear is indeed fear for one’s property and freedom, and in both sexes such fear occurs with approximately the same frequency.
Psychologists note that
in recent years the number of women who are afraid of the prospect of upcoming marriage has increased . On this basis, neuroses develop and gamophobia is formed. Fear before a wedding is not just worry and excitement, but a serious problem. In men, the disorder most often appears before the age of 25, although it also occurs in those older. It all starts with harmless statements about negative attitudes towards marriage. The more those around you try to change this opinion, the more firmly the negative attitude becomes stronger in the mind.
Indeed, marriage is a responsible step, and any person has some concerns associated with it. But if normally worries concern the correct choice of a future life partner, his moral and other qualities, then for a person suffering from gamophobia, the wedding itself and the registration of the relationship come to the fore. A person with phobic fear is not tormented by doubts; he is negatively disposed, regardless of who the candidate for husband or wife is.
Men and women suffering from gamophobia sometimes date for a long time and even live with their loved ones without the problem becoming apparent. Gamophobia reveals itself only when it comes to giving relationships the appropriate status. If the other half is serious and starts talking about the wedding in a categorical tone, such a person simply breaks off the relationship. The reason for separation can be any little thing, from an incorrectly placed cup to suspicions of infidelity.
The choice of a woman, the choice of a spouse, the choice of a wife who resembles a mother
A common variant of psychosexual immaturity is the choice of a woman who resembles her mother. In such a marriage, the man plays the role of a child, expecting care and freedom from any responsibilities. He may show his reluctance to be a father, since the child could threaten his privileged position in the family, competing with his wife's feelings. When a child is born, the husband feels relegated to the background and begins to demonstrate passive resistance, indifference, disappointment, or make complaints.
Son's sex life, masturbation (masturbation), sex technique, tips for sexual intercourse
With psychosexual immaturity, mothers have detailed information about their son’s sex life, his maturation, masturbation, the women with whom he communicated, his sexual disorders, find him a girlfriend, arrange joint holidays, hold conversations with their son’s future sexual partners, introducing them to sexual problems , give practical advice on sex techniques. In all marital conflicts, the mother takes the side of her son, tries to denigrate her daughter-in-law, promotes divorce proceedings, proves to her son that only she is really necessary for him, that he will never meet a woman who could bestow him with boundless love.
Incest, incest, sexual contact between mother and son
Incest is an extreme form of pathology in which sexual contact occurs between relatives. A synonym for incest is incest. With incest, the mother seeks to make her son so emotionally dependent on herself that she does not hesitate to even resort to active sexual contact to strengthen it. The mother has sex with her son and actively engages in sexual intercourse. The son engages in vaginal, anal, oral sex, and has sexual intercourse with his mother. Mother and son love to watch films and videos of erotic and pornographic content together.
Treatment of psychosexual immaturity of men and women in Saratov
Sarclinic provides comprehensive treatment that allows you to normalize a man’s mental status and break the psychological umbilical cord connecting a man to his mother. The difficulty of treatment can be complicated by the fact that some men themselves do not mind their addiction, because thanks to it they have freedom, time, are freed from various responsibilities, and continue to play the role of a little boy that is beneficial for themselves. They satisfy their sexual desires in episodic relationships, which are approved by their mothers. They lack a motivated reason to treat these conditions.
Causes of Gamophobia
The source of fear is the activity of the unconscious . According to the theory followed by modern scientists, fear does not begin immediately, but develops gradually. A person, realizing that in some situations he experiences pain, shame, awkwardness or another negative emotion, begins to avoid them. Meanwhile, suppressed emotions intensify.
This theory also has opponents with their own arguments. They argue that most people with a fear of marriage have never experienced what they fear. Their anxiety was formed under the influence of films, programs, and stories from friends. The brain can perceive someone else's experience as experienced, and therefore a disorder develops.
Often, panic fear of marriage is formed in people with a good financial position. Such people are frightened by the prospect of divorce, and with it the risk of incurring serious costs or even losing everything. In practice, this is possible, because regulations are not always implemented properly, but the likelihood of such a development of events is negligible.
The most common cause of gamophobia, according to psychologists, is negative memories from childhood. From a child who constantly observed parents’ hatred towards each other, scenes of family violence and alcoholism, an anxious adult prone to panic attacks grows up.
A phobic disorder can be especially severe if a person, as a child, experienced violence, bullying and humiliation from parents, including step-parents. As an adult, such a person is likely to experience a panicky fear of marriage and will make every effort to avoid it. As we grow older, fear does not decrease, but increases.
Only in adulthood do some people decide to consult a psychotherapist, realizing that their fears are irrational. Qualified help is the most effective way to get rid of the problem, because here you need to work with the subconscious, and without the presence of “another” this is impossible.
How to overcome fear of a girl? How to overcome your fear of a girl?
If you are interested in questions on the topics - incest, fear of weddings and marriage, mental and sexual immaturity, how to overcome the fear of a girl , how to overcome the fear of a girl, in men before sex, ask the doctor a question online for free on the sarclinic website. The doctor knows how to overcome the fear of a girl , of a virgin.
Sign up for a consultation. There are contraindications. Specialist consultation is required. Photo: Nikitta | Dreamstime.com\Dreamstock.ru. The people depicted in the photo are models, do not suffer from the diseases described and/or all similarities are excluded.
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Comments ()
Symptoms and signs
If a person is worried about his reluctance to get married, he should not make hasty conclusions, suspecting he has gamophobia. It is quite natural that before the wedding you need to think about everything, calculate whether there is a material and moral opportunity to live together or whether it is better to wait for now. It's worth worrying when the brain doesn't react to everything related to marriage in the most adequate way.
Physical manifestations
There is no single set of manifestations by which one could accurately diagnose a disorder without being a specialist. A person's fears are as unique as he is. In addition to mental symptoms, physical symptoms may be present, for example:
- frequent headache;
- indigestion;
- trembling in the limbs;
- muscle tension;
- cardiopalmus.
Still, one of the typical signs that allows one to identify a gamophobe is an aversion to long-term relationships. Sometimes fear extends to cohabitation. For example, while a couple is dating but living separately, the partner with phobic fear behaves adequately. But as soon as the other party hints that it would be nice to get married or live together, fear is activated. The carrier of the phobia either disappears or starts a scandal, the purpose of which is to find a reason to break off the relationship, blaming the partner.
Behavioral features
When talking with a gamophobe about marriage, others may notice that he is too verbose when he begins to explain his reluctance to start a family . A person who does not experience phobic fear will simply say that he is not ready yet, has not achieved material well-being, has not completed his studies, etc.
The carrier of a phobia will not limit himself to this. He will begin to describe at length and in colors the delights of a free life, trying to hide the true reason. The speech will be so beautiful and well-reasoned that the opponent will only have to shrug his shoulders. This is typical for people who lie, but in this case the lie is not conscious, because the speaker himself believes in what is said. Fear sits so deep that the bearer is not aware of it.
When there is a conversation about a wedding next to a gamophobe, such a person experiences nervous tension, but is able to hide it. If he is directly offered to enter into an official relationship, the matter may end in an attack of aggression. An average person with phobic fear himself suffers from his feelings, feeling guilty. But such is the nature of the psyche that any contact with a trigger is followed by a reaction.
