How to understand that a man has lost interest in a woman: the psychologist named 5 signs: news, psychology, relationships, love, experts, love and family

Not all relationships are meant to last forever; people may realize they're not right for each other.

However, not everyone has the courage to talk directly about their faded feelings: it’s easier for them to do whatever they want, as long as the girl leaves them first.

Maria Medvedeva, an expert at the online publication BelNovosti, crisis psychologist and suicidologist, talks about how to identify a man who has lost interest in a woman.

You should be alert to the following signs :

The number of calls and messages throughout the day dwindles.

First, you need to look at it in dynamics. If at the beginning of the relationship there was correspondence 24/7, and now, after several months, there are 3-4 messages a day, then there is reason to think about it.

Of course, you need to take into account that there are periods of high busyness, but if a man is interested in continuing the relationship, he will definitely make it clear that he is constantly thinking about you and regrets that there is no opportunity to communicate.

By the form in which the message is written, you can always see whether he really does not have a free minute, or whether he prefers other activities to communicating with you. Note: Please listen to your man. If he asks you to treat his silence with understanding, it means he definitely cares.

Signs and examples of how a man increases distance in a relationship

Let us turn to the experience of practicing psychologists who identify typical signs of a man’s cooling feelings towards his partner:

He begins to avoid in every possible way discussing joint plans for the future, plans for a joint vacation, marriage, planning for children, and large joint purchases for a common household.
A man stops complimenting his woman and affectionately calling her “Sunny” or “Bunny”, calling her simply by name.
Previously, some of a woman’s everyday habits, for example, walking around the house in pajamas, leaving dishes in the sink until the evening, were either not noticed by a man or considered “highlights.” Now they cause him irritation or criticism.
The man is no longer jealous of his partner and becomes indifferent to the woman’s attempts to flirt with strangers. It happens that a man himself begins to calmly flirt with the ladies in her presence.
He no longer strives to protect and help his partner in a difficult situation for her. For example, he doesn’t see her off late at night, and doesn’t ask whether she got there safely.
A man stops being interested in the woman’s affairs, problems and emotional state, and he himself stops sharing news from work, his problems and feelings with her. All the woman’s attempts to talk about her experiences are defeated by the defense.
If a man discusses his woman with someone, speaking unflatteringly about her qualities, it means his feelings for her have faded.
In the company of people, a man next to his woman behaves aloof and not verbose, citing a “bad mood,” but without her in the company of friends he is cheerful and sociable.
A man strives to spend as little time as possible with a woman. Stays late at work, spends time with friends, without notifying his lady. Or he takes a mistress.
Men are afraid of women's tears, so they do everything possible so that their beloved does not get upset. But if she is no longer loved, tears only cause irritation.
And of course, the man begins to avoid sex with the woman under various pretexts.

When spending time together, he looks at his phone all the time.

When we are interested in another person, it is important for us to know how he feels about us. Therefore, we look at another person when talking and unconsciously read manifestations of sympathy.

A smile, a hand touching your hair, a relaxed or tense posture. In addition, when we are in a relationship that interests us, we want to be physically closer, to touch the other person. Note: If a person looks at their phone from time to time, this does not necessarily indicate a loss of interest in their partner.

A modern person spends his entire life on his phone, including work contacts, friends, and news. But if a man literally does not let go of the gadget from his hands, and to the cautious question “Do you have something important there?” says “no, I’m just looking at it like that” - this is a wake-up call.

Why does a man lose interest in his woman?

Of course, each case is unique, but there are several common reasons for the fading of feelings for your lady of the heart.

A man may become cold towards his woman due to work pressure and, therefore, a basic lack of time for romance. For the stronger sex, the main thing is to achieve success in their business.
A woman ceases to be attractive in the eyes of a man. She stops taking care of her grooming. This refers not only to the external “packaging”, but the most important thing is the woman’s internal state, her emotional background and behavior.
A man may meet another woman who hooks him with something, or even become interested in some new exciting hobby, such as hunting, that will absorb him entirely. As a rule, the latter is temporary.
Lack of common goals, interests, incompatibility of life values. When the romantic period of a relationship comes to an end, passions subside. Vivid emotional experiences are replaced by either deep and warm feelings, or the man grows cold towards his partner. Relationships do not last long on mutual sexual attraction alone.
A woman becomes emotionally dependent on a man. Values him more than himself, strives to please, literally looks him in the mouth and in other ways overfeeds his ego. In this case, the man will lose respect and interest in her. Over time, such a woman will even become annoying.
A woman many times violates the personal boundaries and principles of her man, not paying attention to numerous warnings from him not to do this. For example, he smothers a man with excessive “mommy” care, controls or begins to give unsolicited advice, criticize his friends, manipulate and set ultimatums.
A woman tries (often, unconsciously) to lead a man in different situations, considering herself more competent in it. Worries about him making the “right” decision.
A woman does not appreciate those ways of showing care that a man implements towards her, or condescendingly takes them for granted. Without receiving gratitude and response in return, a man will lose interest in such a lady.

Lack of initiative

There are people who do not take initiative by nature. They will not refuse to go to the cinema or theater, but they will not choose films and performances on their own.

Usually in such couples the woman is responsible for leisure time and, if this suits both, problems do not arise. But when a man suddenly stops showing initiative, this may indicate that he is losing interest in his partner.

Few questions

Infatuation with a person means the inability to get enough of him. An enthusiastic man shows curiosity, interest, and tries to extract all possible information in order to get to know his beloved better. But the disinterested person is the exact opposite of what is written above: silent, aloof, eyes turned to the side, attention distracted. Naturally, before drawing sharp conclusions, you should make sure that your loved one has no internal worries. If everything is fine with him, then there is definitely something wrong with the relationship.

Reviews from real people

Why do men lose interest in a woman after sex? What do real people say about this?

Feedback on the forum

There are many people, and everyone has different opinions.

What to do3

Don't take on too much

Often a man's interest disappears when he feels unwanted. We try to take care of him, and sometimes we don’t let him do anything on his own. “Darling, no need to help, I can handle it!” - is this a familiar phrase? She is the most terrible enemy of strong relationships. We grab onto everything, and in the end our chosen one feels that he is not needed. He does not fulfill his male role, he finds himself out of work.

Not only stop taking the initiative away from him with the words “I can do it myself,” but also ask him to help you. Stop carrying heavy packages by yourself just because you don’t want to disturb him and are too lazy to wait. No really. Wait. You want to regain his interest, right? Let him make whatever contribution he can to your life.

Don’t forget to praise your loved one: “Oh, if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have finished these bags myself!” “Turn on” the girl. “Oh-oh, something broke there... I don’t know what... something... I’m afraid to go there. Help! And here you are again, a weak young lady who needs to be groomed, cherished and protected. And the man is on a horse, and not the one that gallops near a burning hut :) He is proud of himself and satisfied.

Find a hobby

Surely all your free time is devoted to your loved one, and only to him. How could it be otherwise, you ask? No way. There must be, in addition to work and home, some kind of hobby, something for the soul. This promotes personal growth and brings variety to life.

Remember what you did when you weren't in a relationship yet. Have you played table tennis? Wonderful. Spent a lot of time with your friends? This will do too. Resume forgotten yoga trips and master classes on making handmade soap. Walk around the guests. Or find a new activity. Then your partner will see that the whole world is not focused on him, that you have your own desires and interests. And he will also begin to fear: what if you meet someone better than him at the tennis section?

Create the illusion of competition

Since a man, by definition, is all about conqueror and owner, give him what he wants. But without fanaticism. So that the chosen one in no case decides that you are cheating on him. Then the opposite effect will happen: instead of strengthening the relationship, you will get “divorce and a bedside table.”

Proceed carefully: “Today I was walking down the street and some impudent guy picked me up. Give me, he says, your phone number. I say, I already have a man. And he doesn't lag behind. I had to dive into the grocery store. How arrogant faces have become these days.” “I met a friend, we studied together. She says: she saw a former classmate and asked everything about me. It was like unhappy love once upon a time. And I didn’t even know. Ha-ha, come on!” and so on. Be prepared for the man to get angry. But he will think about it. What if someone covets his property? Such thoughts will make him fight for you.

Bring a little variety to your intimate life

Surprise your partner with something new. Especially if sex has been going according to the same scenario for a long time. Just be prepared for the fact that your man will like the new course of events, and you will have to periodically return to your newly acquired knowledge. Therefore, do not decide on something that you obviously may not like.

Calm, just calm! What not to do2

A woman’s most natural impulse is to immediately discuss the current situation. She feels bad and in pain, of course we need to talk about it! No no and one more time no. A man generally tends to remain silent until the last moment (see about the roast rooster).

In such conversations, partners hear each other in their own way, and the conversation will descend into mutual accusations and scandal. Grit your teeth and use other methods. Don’t fight the problem like a man, head-on, but use a little feminine wisdom and cunning. Fortunately, every girl has these qualities, you just need to allow them to reveal themselves. All ladies are a bit of an actress. Remember this. And take action!

Is it possible to give ultimatums?

Stages of conflict - a brief description of the main stages in psychology

Often in family relationships, partners, trying to solve their own problems, give an ultimatum to their other half. If a man values a woman, his beloved's demands will be satisfied.

Important! This situation will not be repeated indefinitely.

Ultimatum

If a man respects himself and does not want to become a weak-willed person, he will definitely break off the connection with the manipulative girl.

Giving an ultimatum will almost never lead to a conscious, mature relationship. Due to the constant violation of other people's boundaries, the connection with your partner will weaken and love will evaporate.

Additional Information. The exception is situations where the husband is addicted to alcohol or drugs. In such cases, an ultimatum can play an important role in motivating change.

Reasons why a guy has lost interest in you

The candy-bouquet period someday ends, common everyday life begins, and passion is replaced by habit. Surprise and admiration disappeared from the relationship, and your chosen one began to feel increasingly cold.

As a rule, men are the first to cool down. This happens after about 5 years of living together. There can be many reasons for burnout.

Ungroomed appearance

Even the most unkempt man does not like to be around an unkempt and unkempt woman. Whatever he is, the chosen one should be the subject of his pride and admiration.

Nothing flatters a man’s vanity more than a well-groomed and stylish girl walking next to him, attracting the gaze of others.

Excess weight, lack of hairstyle and manicure, and an unkempt face are the main reasons why the guy has probably lost interest in you.

Boredom and predictability

When a man reads his chosen one like an open book and can predict all her actions, the woman becomes boring and the guy loses interest in her.

To prevent this from happening, you need to remain a little eccentric and always have some surprises in your arsenal.

Quarrelsomeness and grumpiness

After a certain time of living together, a woman begins to sincerely believe that everything that happens should correspond to her desires. If this does not happen, she begins to provoke conflicts, becomes grouchy and irritable.

The man, unable to withstand the eternal reproaches and psychological pressure, slowly but surely moves away and grows cold.

Lack of romance

Regardless of the number of years you have lived together, you should not allow romance to disappear from a relationship.

Continue to call each other affectionately and sweetly, indulge in pleasant memories together more often, arrange walks, trips to the cinema, dinners at a restaurant. Don't let your former closeness and happiness evaporate.

Boredom in bed is a very likely reason why a guy has lost his temper

Men are dreamers and need variety more than women. The same type of sex life quickly leads them to boredom. If a partner avoids novelty, then she seriously risks the relationship, because routine is the main enemy of passion.

If a man does not get what he wants from his beloved, he will go to someone else’s bed for it.