The objective maturation of our body also affects our psychological well-being. But age-related crises are not only suffering and danger, but also an excellent opportunity for an “upgrade.”
Many people probably know the curious fact that the word “crisis” is translated ambiguously from Chinese. It consists of two hieroglyphs - one is translated as “danger”, and the other is “opportunity”.
Any crisis, be it on a national or personal level, is a kind of new start, a staging area where we can stand, think and set new goals for ourselves, analyze everything we can do and everything we want to learn.
Sometimes this happens consciously, sometimes unconsciously. Crises are not always very precisely tied to a specific age; for some, they occur earlier or later by six months to a year and occur in varying degrees of intensity. But in any case, it is important to understand the reasons for their occurrence and typical scenarios in order to survive them with minimal losses and maximum benefit for yourself and your loved ones.
Age crises in humans
The following crises in a person’s life are distinguished by year:
- First year;
- Three years;
- 6-7 years;
- 13-15 years old;
- 18 years;
- 30 years;
- 40-45 years old;
- after 55 years (pre-retirement).
Psychologist L. S. Vygotsky identifies the following stages of the crisis:
- 1) Pre-crisis period.
- 2) The crisis itself.
- 3) Post-crisis period.
Each age crisis of childhood is a sign of the child’s psychological maturity, his transition to a higher, qualitatively new level of development. Time limits are relatively arbitrary, but experts say that a child's psyche is especially vulnerable at the ages of one, three, six-seven and eleven years. These periods can be considered turning points in development. They can manifest themselves in mental instability and inconsistency. Parents must understand what a crisis is and behave patiently towards the child.
Appearance sequence:
- Crisis of the first year of life. The main thing that the baby learned by the end of this period was walking. Now he perceives the world completely differently and feels his increased capabilities. The child wants to learn as much new things as possible, everything arouses his sincere interest, so he climbs into all the drawers and secret corners of the apartment. This desire for independence often manifests itself in a complete refusal of adult help.
- Third year of life. This age should be perceived as a new turn in the development of a small personality. As a rule, difficulties manifest themselves much more clearly than the crisis in the first year of life. The child already has basic skills and copes with many tasks independently. He understands that he is not so dependent on an adult, so he persistently defends his rights.
Whims and tantrums of a child during an age crisis
- Crisis 6-7 years. At this age, preschoolers can completely ignore the words of their parents and react only to more stringent demands. To establish a good relationship, adults must recognize that their child is sure that he has become big. In the periodization of psychologist D. B. Elkonin, this crisis is considered as a division into two periods: preschool childhood and primary school age. L. S. Vygotsky discovered two main characteristics of this crisis: grimacing and self-importance. In his opinion, the loss of childish naivety and spontaneity is especially characteristic of children aged seven.
- Next comes the so-called “pre-transition crisis.” Psychologists say that at this age (10-11 years) the first signs of the transition period may appear. A teenager changes not only internally, but also externally, sometimes he is frightened by what is happening. He begins to think and feel differently.
- A serious age crisis is the puberty period (13-15 years). This is due not only to hormonal changes in the body, but also to constant attempts to find one’s place in society. Teenagers often become uncontrollable, have nervous breakdowns, and it is at this age that drug or alcohol addiction can develop.
Adults often do not understand teenagers
- The next age crisis comes at the age of 18. At this age, young people are already beginning to make serious plans for their future lives. Of course, in their dreams they are famous, they have villas and expensive cars. These dreams are often far from the gray reality and everyday life. Some decide to skip a few levels and get married at this age in order to appear to themselves and others as more mature, the real head of the family.
- Next comes the so-called “midlife crisis” (30 years) - tossing and worrying, the meaninglessness and monotony of life, a turning point. Manifestations are varied: depression, drunkenness, computer games at night, betrayal, boredom, unmotivated conflicts. Midlife crisis is more common in men; women only take it over.
Middle age crisis
- Then comes the longest and most frustrating crisis phase. It comes at the age of 40-45, when a person begins not only to understand, but also to physically feel that he is mortal. Wrinkles and bald spots appear, your health periodically fails, money no longer brings the same satisfaction, you want to find a job for your soul. All this is fraught with mental disorders. Here the same irreplaceable comrades come to the rescue: drunkenness, debauchery, betrayal, a wave of divorces.
- Pre-retirement crisis. A person asks himself about his purpose, analyzes life, his meaning in it. Upset about where society is going. Has experience, wants to change the world for the better. There is a desire to teach others or become a healer, and become obsessed with new solutions to problems.
What definitions do scientists give?
The midlife crisis is also called the crisis of the elderly. Like other similar periods that arise during life, this is a transition to a new age group , a revision of values and priorities, an assessment of achievements and everything that was done in previous years.
Bernard Livehud
He provided complete information about the crisis. According to him, at the age of approximately 55-56 years, a new stage begins in the life of every person. If earlier life was perceived as something long, many prospects and opportunities were seen ahead, now the future has only vague, incomprehensible outlines.
The realization comes that it was not possible to do everything that was planned.
Charlotte Buhler
If we briefly describe the scientist’s thoughts, the main thing is that the crisis of adulthood is the beginning of aging. She called it a difficult age of mental crisis. People understand that their lives will soon change dramatically as they are about to retire.
David Bromley
In his opinion, the period from 55 to 65 years is precisely the pre-retirement age, which is associated with a decrease in physical strength, a decrease in the level of intelligence, weakening of sexual function and loss of interests.
Galina Abramova
G. S. Abramova divided people experiencing a crisis of adulthood into 3 groups:
- The first is those who want to finally retire in order to devote themselves to their favorite activities, gain new knowledge, or simply relax.
- The second is people who are afraid of retirement. By any means they try to work as long as possible, because they do not want to feel helpless, unable to earn money for at least the most necessary things.
- The third group is indifferent. A person with this trait does not panic or worry about retirement. He no longer considers work the meaning of his life, so he simply goes with the flow.
Reasons for appearance
Midlife crisis in men - what is it, when does it begin?
The cause of crises lies in the emergence of contradictions between new needs that are no longer satisfied and current or past conditions. Each period of age-related development has an incentive for future change and development - this is the basis for the formation of the individual.
Note! In each period of crisis, differences between limited capabilities, new needs and social experience (the reaction of loved ones) increase. Today, according to psychologists, this dissonance is considered as a driving force in the development of the psyche.
Neoplasms
After the successful completion of the crisis of adulthood, a person moves to a new level of his development.
The main new formation that he acquires is wisdom. He learns to accept and love himself regardless of:
- appearance;
- social status;
- financial situation.
He develops the ability to enjoy everything that happens in his life. In addition, people understand how important the support of family and friends is.
How to understand that an age crisis has arrived
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The age crisis comes suddenly and also disappears. Resolving the crisis is associated with the establishment of new social relations with the environment, which can be productive or destructive.
Changes in a child’s behavior are a sign of the onset of a crisis
Signs of a crisis:
- behavior changes;
- there is a desire to quit a good job;
- unexplained bouts of depression when performing tasks that previously made the person happy;
- change of habits - activities that used to bring pleasure are now boring.
- irritability or sudden anger;
- the person leaves (mentally or physically) the family or feels trapped in the current family relationship;
- looks in the mirror and no longer recognizes himself;
- the desire for physically free flow, movement (running, cycling, dancing, fast red sports cars, skydiving, etc.);
- learning new things;
- changes in sleep patterns (usually less);
- thoughts about death and its nature appear;
- external changes.
What age is it associated with, when does it start and how long does it last?
According to psychologists, the crisis of adulthood occurs between 55-65 years .
This means that you shouldn’t wait for it on your birthday at 55 or immediately after retirement at 60 or 65. There are no specific limits here. It all depends on the person himself, on the characteristics of his character, emotional state and other factors.
The same can be said about the duration of the crisis period. Some people cope with it in a few months , accepting themselves at any age. And someone falls into despair and depression, plunging more and more into worries. In this case, the crisis drags on for years.
In addition to personality traits, the overall duration of the crisis is also influenced by factors such as the availability of support from family and friends, financial situation, and state of health (physical and mental).
Is it possible to overcome
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Most psychologists believe that a crisis is the most important prerequisite for personal change, the nature of which can be either positive: constructive, creative, integrative, or negative: destructive, destructive.
Important! Psychology says that you can overcome a crisis on your own, but it is better if your loved ones help. Parents can help their child. To do this, it is necessary to penetrate into the inner world of a teenager, find out what he is interested in, accept his musical preferences, clothing style, and worldview. Family and friends will help an adult facing a crisis.
Growing up crises
Stages
Everyone experiences a crisis period in their own way. If a person is confident in himself, it will be easier for him to cope with difficulties. People who are unsure of themselves face all its manifestations.
Regardless of these features, the crisis occurs in several stages:
- Revaluation . In this case, we are not talking about priorities, but about inner peace. A person reassesses his self. He gets used to changing roles, to transforming from an experienced specialist into a pensioner.
- Awareness of frailty and dependence . This is the hardest thing to come to terms with. But if this happens, there will be relief.
- Adoption . After a person understands that time still cannot be stopped and he will have to get used to his new self, the last stage of the crisis of adulthood will begin.
All stages as a whole can be called a complex psychosocial conflict, which can lead to the development of serious problems.
The main age crises in the table
The table provides brief advice for loved ones and the person himself who is going through a crisis stage.
Major age-related crises in life
A crisis | Signs of the period | What to do |
1 year | Increasing the child’s capabilities and the emergence of a large number of new needs every day. Parents notice that the child is doing more and more actions on his own, showing impulsive reactions (crying, screaming, stamping his feet, fighting, biting). This is a reaction to a lack of understanding of his desires on the part of adults. | Parents need to allow their child to realize independence. |
3 years | The child exhibits negative reactions, becomes stubborn, obstinate, strives for power, shows protest, and changes in behavior. | There is no need to correct behavior. It is necessary to create conditions for the child where he can show his independence and organize his activities. |
7 years | Children at this age no longer look spontaneous, they grimace and behave more, their behavior is artificially tense, withdrawn, and uncontrollable. | Parents need to reconsider the prohibitions; maybe it’s better to give him freedom in some ways, to show his independence. Children should be treated like an adult; their opinions and judgments should also be taken into account. You need to communicate with children on a positive note, less force them to do something under pressure. |
Pre-teen (11 years old) | Children feel inferior and lack knowledge, which is interconnected with their performance at school. | Parents should support the child psychologically, help him determine the type of activity that will later become the basis of his future. It must be remembered that a child is an individual person, and accordingly, treat him with respect. |
Puberty | Conflict situations with adults and stress arise more and more often, so parents may lose authority. Excessive maturity has its own values. | Parents need to create a trusting atmosphere in the house, find out his needs, interests, desires, and support his endeavors. |
18 years | At this age, a person withdraws into himself, avoids relationships with others, withdraws socially, and therefore feels lonely. | Doing something new, exciting, and loved ones needs to be supported and controlled less, and help make the right choice of profession. |
30 years | There is an assessment of the past and a sober look into the future. Wants peace and stability. | Engage in physical activity, self-education and self-organization, you need to resume a hobby or find a new one, implement what was previously planned, and devote time to your family. |
40-45 years | A person has a sense of self-respect, critically rethinks his own goals, gets rid of the illusion and some unrealized dreams that he had in his youth, so he experiences this hard. | Go on a trip with your family or just change your surroundings, play sports to keep your body in good shape, try to get rid of bad habits, learn to appreciate your family, re-evaluate your values, learn to enjoy life, do not separate yourself from your family. |
Pre-retirement | Features: loss of strength, passivity, tendency to reminisce, peace, have wisdom. The status of the social role decreases, the previous rhythm of life stops, and therefore deterioration of health (physiological and psychological) often occurs. | Engage in social or favorite activities that bring joy, realize that this period is inevitable, you can share experiences with former colleagues, fulfill a long-standing (possibly extreme) dream, there should be a friendly attitude with children. |
An age crisis is a stage of growing up that you can go through on your own. Relatives can support and provide assistance so that this moment in a person’s life passes less painfully, easily and without consequences. It is important to monitor the behavior of a loved one, be interested in his feelings and experiences. Any changes in behavior and changes in interests may indicate that an age crisis has occurred. You can seek advice from a psychologist; his help may consist of a list of recommendations, both for the person himself during a crisis and for his family.
A person who is going through a crisis needs to understand that this process in life is natural, and should not be afraid of it or give in to panic. Psychologists also recommend choosing an activity that brings joy, constantly developing, and not focusing on one thing.
The importance of a difficult period
How a person copes with a crisis of maturity determines the characteristics of his behavior in the future.
And there will still be periods of crisis along the way. This is the first point. Second, ignoring problems aggravates the situation and prolongs the crisis. In some cases it lasts for several years . Not paying attention to unpleasant symptoms is one of the main mistakes.
The other is to remain alone. The support of family and friends is worth a lot. Even a simple confidential conversation lifts your spirits. What can we say about a sincere desire to help.
Concept and essence
An age crisis is a special stage in personality development, which, if unfavorable, can become a negative turning point in life. This term was first introduced by Vygotsky. For each age, psychology has a number of norms that experts pay attention to when examining individual people. If there are deviations from the norms, a method for correcting them is developed.
It is believed that age-related crises are necessary to change the human psyche, but many psychologists do not agree with this. The opinion of scientists on this matter is divided into 2 types:
- Erikson, Vygotsky, Freud believed that age-related crises are an integral stage of human development.
- Zaporozhets and Rubinstein assumed that age-related crises arise individually for each person.
Most crisis situations occur not only as a result of growing up, but also under the influence of surrounding factors.
Help from a psychologist
When overcoming a crisis, the help of a psychologist is often needed. Psychological assistance is always individual in nature. That is, a specific case is analyzed, there cannot be general advice.
As a rule, psychocorrection is prescribed for children and consultations for adolescents and adults. In addition to conversations, art therapy and fairy tale therapy are used for children. Teenagers sometimes receive group psychotherapeutic help. Trainings are recommended for adults, group psychotherapy is recommended for older people. In some cases, family counseling is possible at every age.
People who endure the crisis more severely, and therefore need support more often, are:
- with internal disharmony and elements of infantilism in behavior;
- with accentuations of character;
- not independent in decision making;
- differing in external locus of control (blaming the environment for failures);
- with the perception of the crisis as a dead end that interrupts life, and not as an opportunity for growth.
It is important to perceive a crisis as a difficult but surmountable situation that requires great responsibility and ensures personal development if it is successfully completed. The goal of going through a crisis is to learn to accept the new yourself from a position of positive thinking.