Family relationships: the secret to a happy marriage

In this article we will tell you:

  1. Features of the psychology of family relationships
  2. What kind of relationships are there in families?
  3. Principles of family relationships
  4. What is the secret to a happy marriage?
  5. Types of family relationships
  6. Features of the relationship between spouses

A family is a community of people united by marriage or blood ties. They have a common way of life, goals, responsibilities, moral standards and traditions. Family relationships represent warm feelings towards parents and children, as well as other relatives. They are based on support, assistance and mutual assistance in difficult times. It is very important to build a family, knowing exactly why such a union is necessary.

General socio-psychological characteristics of a prosperous family

Family characteristics

Family composition:

Father - Petr Nesterov (43 years old), education - secondary specialized, works in a construction company as a workshop manager.

Mother - Maria Nesterova (38 years old), education - higher pedagogical, works as a primary school teacher in a gymnasium.

The child is Andrey Nesterov (12 years old), studying at the gymnasium.

The Nesterov family is characterized as complete with one child. Responsibilities within the family are clearly distributed in equal shares: the father is the head and breadwinner of the family, he has financial and educational functions, the mother dominates at the everyday and psychological-emotional level.

The Nesterov family has stable financial support. Parents work and receive an official salary; the child is given pocket money for good studies and help around the house. Andrey is provided with all the necessary things - he has a lot of toys, educational supplies, and a varied selection of clothes. The child has his own room, in which, at the request of his parents, he can put things in order on his own.

Raising a child in a family is carried out according to a democratic type. The psychological climate is stable and calm. In the Nesterov family, positive emotions prevail during the interaction of family members with each other. There are practically no conflict situations. When such problems arise, family councils are held, where all misunderstandings and pressing issues are resolved.

We can conclude that the Nesterov family is one of the prosperous families. No deviations found.

Love as the main motive for raising a family

Psychologists call love as a special type of interaction between spouses the main criterion necessary for creating a family. Researcher I. Kon offers a classification of love consisting of 6 types:

  1. Hedonistic. It is expressed by light flirting, making advances, and enjoying the interaction. The partner’s personality is neutralized; only the ability to satisfy the need matters. Feelings are superficial, separation occurs quickly and does not cause traumatic experiences.
  2. Erotic. It is typical for this model of love to experience a high intensity of passions, to strive for complete fusion with one’s partner, submission, unity, and sensual physical contact.
  3. Pragmatic. An alliance based on pragmatism and sober calculation. For this type of marriage, feelings fade into the background; the main role is played by obtaining benefits. When spouses get what they need or find an option that helps them get more, the marriage ends.
  4. Selfless. Altruistic love, with unequal division of marital responsibilities. One of the spouses becomes a conditional parent for the other, fulfilling the needs of the “child.” Such relationships lead to complete social unfulfillment of the supervised partner, emotional and physical inequality.
  5. Love-friendship. A strong alliance built on equality, mutual respect and sincerity. Love-friendship is characterized by a high level of spiritual intimacy, communication, and exchange of emotions.
  6. Love-mania. Represents an unhealthy fanatical obsession. The lover depends on the object of worship, deifies him, strives for complete possession. If the object of love commits an act that the lover regards as bad and does not correspond to the image, love disappears.

Women, according to Kohn, tend to choose altruistic relationship options, men prefer erotic love and hedonism.

A completed profile of a student’s family from the class teacher

Characteristic

for the family of a student of Secondary School No. 471, St. Petersburg, Vasily Mikhailovich Preobrazhensky, born July 15, 2012.

Composition: complete family.

Father - Alexey Yuryevich Preobrazhensky, born in 1977, higher education, place of work - Main Directorate of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of Russia for St. Petersburg and the Leningrad Region.

Mother - Preobrazhenskaya Lyudmila Sergeevna, born in 1979, secondary specialized education, place of work - restaurant "Balkan".

Residence address: St. Petersburg, Zhukovskogo street, 29.

The family lives in a three-room apartment; parents and Vasily have their own rooms. The work space is organized, the apartment is equipped with the latest household appliances and all amenities.

The child is raised in a trusting and caring relationship. Parents monitor Vasily’s behavior and progress and monitor his homework. Also, Vasily attends the tennis section and takes additional classes in French.

At school, Vasily communicates with all his classmates, and in some situations shows leadership qualities. He was not seen in conflicts with other children.

Alexey Yurievich and Lyudmila Sergeevna participate in the life of the class and school. Regularly attend parent meetings and school events. Provide timely feedback to teachers regarding comments and requests.

The Preobrazhensky family expresses itself only from the good side, there are no comments or wishes.

Relationship crises

A crisis situation arises under the influence of various factors. The presence of economic problems, adultery, conflicts with relatives lead to an intra-family crisis. Also, all married couples go through 2 main crisis stages.

The onset of the first is noted between 3 and 7 years of marriage. The development of the crisis is facilitated by:

  • disappearance of primary interest;
  • partner's everyday habits;
  • regular occurrence of situations that cause disagreement between spouses;
  • accumulation of emotional stress;
  • failure of the spouse to meet expectations.

The second crisis occurs between the 17th and 25th year of marriage. Partners experience it more easily, but it lasts longer - 3–5 years. The emergence of the second crisis coincides with the following factors:

  • the emergence of a feeling of dissatisfaction with the degree of social fulfillment;
  • increased emotional destabilization;
  • increasing dependence of spouses on each other;
  • professional stagnation;
  • decreased sexual activity.

Crisis situations are inevitable, but depending on the development of the spouses’ personalities and the desire to maintain the relationship, they are more difficult or easier.

Characteristics of a kindergarten student’s family from the teacher

Characteristics of the Petrov family, Nizhny Novgorod

Family composition: complete.

Father - Sergei Valentinovich Petrov, place of work - Department of the FSB of the Russian Federation for the Nizhny Novgorod Region.

Mother - Raisa Fedorovna Petrova, place of work - City Clinical Hospital No. 5.

The child is Alisa Sergeevna Petrova, born in 2021, studying at the Rainbow Medical Educational Institution.

Alice is a capable child: she can read, write and count, and she dances. During classes he shows perseverance and attentiveness, and is rarely distracted. Builds friendly relationships with peers and has the beginnings of leadership skills. Well developed memory and erudition. Alice enjoys playing games and completing assigned tasks.

The girl always comes neat and neatly dressed, with a beautiful hairstyle. She takes care of herself completely, is independent, and uses kitchen utensils correctly. Parents drop off and pick up their child on time. Visits to the MADO are not allowed without a good reason.

The relationship between parents and daughter is absolutely positive, love and care are visible. The child is given enough attention.

Parents participate in their daughter’s life and are interested in her achievements, attend preschool events, and are always in touch.

Reasons for an unsuccessful marriage

Dissatisfaction with the needs of spouses leads to conflicts. According to the degree of danger for the family, conflicts are:

  1. Non-hazardous. They arise as an adequate response to objective difficulties. Appear suddenly and resolve quickly.
  2. Dangerous. Rarely lead to serious disagreements, but cause regular increase in tension between spouses. They manifest themselves in minor everyday conflicts: spouses’ attempts to change each other’s habits, demands to conform to ideas, to reconsider habits. Such conflicts provoke confrontation and the need to resolve the dilemma.
  3. Particularly dangerous. May cause divorce.

The motivation for the last category of conflicts requires detailed consideration. Motives for divorce can arise in any type of family, but people with low social responsibility, deviant behavior, and a low level of intelligence are more susceptible to them. Among the reasons for divorce are:

  1. Adultery, dissatisfaction with the sexual activity of the spouse. Cheating is the result of dissatisfaction with family life and disharmony in sexual relations. Full satisfaction of sexual needs is impossible without a positive emotional background and respect for marital fidelity.
  2. Character differences. The inability to come to terms with certain character traits, the destructive behavior of a spouse, and self-centeredness are the reasons for the constant emergence of conflicts that lead to the alienation of spouses.
  3. Domestic alcoholism, aggressive behavior. Abuse of alcohol and other drugs leads to scandals, financial difficulties, an increased risk of psychoneurological disorders, and marital dissatisfaction.

Insufficient awareness of spouses in matters of adequate conflict resolution, productive communication, and skills for developing family relationships, spouses will repeat destructive patterns of behavior even in the event of remarriage, which will inevitably lead to divorce.

An example of characterizing the relationships between members of a patriarchal family

Characteristic

Family composition: complete with a pronounced patriarchal direction.

Father - Kuznetsov Alexander Mikhailovich, born in 1976, has a higher legal education, place of work - legal organization Law and Law LLC.

Mother - Elena Pavlovna Kuznetsova, born in 1981, has a secondary specialized education, and is a housewife.

Children: Marina and Dmitry Kuznetsov, born in 2003 and 2005. Marina is a first-year student at the university, Dmitry is at school.

The Kuznetsov family lives in a private house, which has all the necessary conditions for a comfortable and convenient life. Each family member has his own room.

Alexander Mikhailovich is the head of the family and authority; he is fully responsible for his wife and children. Alexander manages finances and the economy and occupies a high position in society.

Elena Pavlovna manages everyday life and raises children. She has a warm and trusting relationship with her husband; they always spend time together and do not quarrel. Mutual respect and harmony reign in marriage.

For children, the behavior model of their parents is an example. Marina and Dmitry have a good relationship with each other; they almost never conflict.

The Kuznetsov family did not present themselves in a bad way. There are no deviations from the norm.

Dependence of characters on the environment of upbringing

Among the factors influencing the viability of a family and its prosperous existence, the following stand out: the level of upbringing, education of partners, instilled life guidelines, moral beliefs and principles, that is, those characteristics that a husband and wife receive from their parents, who are an example for them. The family’s ability to move in one direction, to constructively resolve conflict situations, and to its harmonious existence and development depends on whether all the above conditions coincide.

As a rule, almost none of the above described types of family relationships are found in nature in a crystal clear form. Thus, brother-sister relationships are often mixed into the characteristics of a traditional family, and codependent relationships are often poisoned by manifestations of tyranny. This naturally complicates the task of a psychologist who has to solve the problem of adjusting the relationships of a single family. Makes it difficult, but doesn't make it impossible. Therefore, for the sake of the harmonious and comfortable existence of your relationship, you can and should contact a competent specialist. As they say, the one who walks can master the road. Therefore, having recognized alarming signs of disharmony in your family union, try to do your best to bring your relationship to a happy level. Yes, this is not an easy task, but the game is worth the candle.

Sample characteristics for a dysfunctional family of a minor child

Characteristic

for the family of a 5th grade student, Municipal Educational Institution Secondary School No. 3, Moscow, Nikita Artemovich Ivanov, born in 2009

Nikita is raised in a single-parent family with her mother and grandmother. Mother - Ivanova Anna Nikolaevna - is currently not employed due to lack of specialized education (she has a 9th grade general education). The family's main income comes from the pension of their grandmother, Antonina Semyonovna Yakovleva.

Nikita’s father filed for divorce in 2011 and does not pay child support. Anna Nikolaevna, in turn, did not go to court.

The apartment in which the child lives has a modest appearance. There is no renovation or modern household appliances, the furniture is old. The boy does not have his own room; he sleeps with his mother. However, there is a place for doing homework in the apartment.

Nikita's clothes and shoes are not new, and he also does not have a phone to contact his parents.

Anna Nikolaevna is involved in raising a child superficially. Basically, this role is performed by the grandmother. She goes to parent-teacher meetings and does homework with Nikita.

Nikita is closed to himself, he has a couple of friends. It is difficult to make contact, academic performance is satisfactory, and the teacher may refuse to fulfill a request or assignment.

Brief conclusion

The situation in the Ivanov family is unfavorable. Living in the conditions described above can aggravate Nikita Ivanov’s psychological state.

What is "empty nest" syndrome?

One of the stages of family development is the departure of adult children from home. Parents are left alone and face difficulties caused by the need to adapt to life together.

The unusual environment is oppressive and deprives you of comfort; a feeling of loneliness and emptiness appears. It’s not clear what to do next and how to build your life. The situation is complicated by the need to come to terms with the following factors:

  • decrease in physical strength, appearance of signs of aging;
  • retirement, decreased income;
  • adaptation to new family roles of grandparents;
  • narrowing the circle of contacts, reducing social significance;
  • building relationships with new relatives.

The problem of the “empty nest” is relevant for parents who saw the meaning of life in their children. The departure of children into independent life is perceived as the destruction of hopes, the disappearance of the meaning of existence. Parents feel abandoned and betrayed. They try to maintain the same relationship, consciously or unconsciously interfering with the children’s independence. Parents can use psychological violence, manipulate, blackmail, children cannot break the psychological connection and create their own family.

Normally, parents overcome the “empty nest” syndrome and come to terms with the new distribution of roles. If the relationship develops unsuccessfully, children remain dependent on their parents for the rest of their lives, even if they live separately.

Additional Samples of Family Characteristics

See and use additional examples of family characteristics.

Continuation of the topic. . .

See – Archive of various (positive and negative) characteristics

Sample power of attorney to receive cargo Power of attorney to receive letters at the post office, sample Power of attorney to receive a parcel at the post office, sample RF Power of attorney to drive a car (machine): sample, form, form Sample power of attorney to receive documents Characteristics: samples, examples, templates and forms

How do our attitudes affect children?

We often impose our own attitudes on the people around us. However, it's not that simple. But it’s much easier to impose attitudes on your own child. But the more we try to achieve our own satisfaction, the more our children suffer.

The attitudes of the mother or father should not in any way infringe on the interests of the child. After all, what we project onto a child, he will project onto his children, and so on. The best solution here is to strive to satisfy each other's needs equally.

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  234. Problematic men: monetize your suffering next to him (Read article)
  235. Mistresses: what is their strength? (Read article)
  236. Love is always mistakes (Read article)
  237. I hate men (women) after a breakup (Read article)
  238. My husband asks for freedom. Don't make this stupid mistake man (Read article)
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  240. How to make a wife respect her husband. (Read article)
  241. Wife's jealousy. (Read article)
  242. Ideal marriage myth or reality. (Read article)
  243. How should a wife behave if her husband returns from his mistress? (Read article)
  244. “Too smart” - what men mean by this concept. Male psychology. (Read article)
  245. Quarrel before the trip. A quarrel in the family over a trip to visit relatives. How not to quarrel before, after or during visits (Read article)
  246. My husband infected me with a sexually transmitted disease or HIV/AIDS (Read article)
  247. Is it only betrayal that destroys a family? What other factors exist for family breakdown? (Read article)
  248. The child is not her husband's. The husband found out that the child is not his... (Read article)
  249. How do mistresses get expensive gifts from men? (Read article)
  250. Block after a quarrel (Read article)
  251. He only needs sex, the kind only he needs! (Read article)
  252. Re-educate the other half? (Read article)
  253. How to become sexier? (Read article)
  254. How do mistresses get expensive gifts? (Read article)
  255. Why do men want non-standard sex? (Read article)
  256. Why do men sniff socks? (Read article)
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  258. Family life (Read more)
  259. Reasons for divorce (Read more)
  260. Husband doesn't want sex with his wife? Why? (Read article)
  261. Religion and family (Read more)
  262. Postpartum depression (Read….)
  263. Death of a child. How to survive the death of a child (Read more..)

Reasons, reasons and motives for divorce. Consequences of divorce, its social role (grade 10)

Divorce is the formal termination (dissolution) of a valid marriage between living spouses. One should distinguish from divorce the recognition of a marriage as invalid by a court and the termination of a marriage due to the death of one of the spouses. In secular states, to which Russia belongs, as well as in a number of faiths, dissolution of a marriage (divorce) is allowed - on various grounds. In Russia, with the consent of both spouses who do not have common children, divorce is possible in the registry office. If one of the spouses is against divorce, as well as if there are common minor children (even with the mutual consent of those divorcing), the divorce is carried out through the court. To protect the rights of children, if a wife is expecting a child, the husband does not have the right to even file a claim for divorce without her consent. In different religious systems, the procedure for divorce can be either much more complicated than in the Russian Federation, or much simpler. For example, the dissolution of a Catholic marriage is almost impossible, but in Muslim law, for a divorce, a husband only needs to utter a special phrase. However, even this simplicity is limited by other regulations. In Russia, just over 1 million couples get married every year, while about 700 thousand families file for divorce.

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