What is the most common question men ask – at trainings, seminars, and to themselves? Of course, among all the “ Why do women cheat?”, “How to get your ex back” and “How to make a girl fall in love with you”, the very question that is indicated in the title stands apart.
This is precisely the question of questions. It would seem that if you know what a woman wants, then you can easily control and manipulate a woman.
Well, or - if we consider a more humane option - you can simply give the woman everything she wants, and then she, happy and satisfied, will forever be with the man who gave her such happiness, will belong to him with all her heart, and will follow him to the edge of the world, yearning for love.
However, if you ask yourself this question, if you are reading this article now, trying to find an answer to it, then you already know that no one has yet given a definite answer to this question.
Hundreds of thousands of books have been written, tens of thousands of writers have translated tons of paper, painting the woman inside and out. Poems, poems, novels, novellas, short stories, philosophical treatises, and scientific research were composed. The psychology of women has been studied. However, no one really gave an answer to this question, at least, an unambiguous and understandable answer. Moreover, opinions were so divided that everything only became more confusing.
And yet, in this article I will answer the question - what does a woman want. You just need to follow my conclusions and read the article to the end, despite the fact that there will be quite a lot of text.
What all girls want
Attracting the attention of the person you like is not so difficult. It's a completely different matter to build strong relationships. Many guys who fail to do this begin to talk about the notorious feminine mystique and willfulness. But understanding what girls want is actually quite easy.
The answer to this question lies at the genetic level - any woman looking for a serious relationship views a man primarily as a father for her future children. Usually this happens unconsciously, but one way or another such a girl will choose a companion who can protect her and their family. In every way. At the same time, the basic requirements for a guy will be extremely simple. Let's try to consider them in order.
The woman wants children
Maybe not right now, but instinctively she will immediately consider you as a potential father of her children. This is why talking about children should not be avoided. Tell me how you had fun with your niece, that you love kids. For a girl, such conversations are like a magnet, which encourages action, as a result of which children appear. To show that you are the one she dreams of, you can do the following:
- Tell her that you always dreamed that your children would have the same freckles as hers, blue eyes, dark skin. Highlight an attractive feature of her appearance and use a weapon that is more serious than a simple compliment.
- Show understanding to a child screaming in a cafe or supermarket with the phrase: “These are children, it’s not always easy with them! But they are cute when they laugh.”
- While walking, treat your child to a chocolate bar or help a woman and her child enter an elevator or a store.
Just don’t scare her with statements that you want children right now, and “a whole football team.” Walking pregnant all her life is definitely not her dream. What matters to her is your willingness to take responsibility for her and the child “if something happens.” She wants to be sure that if two unplanned lines appear on a pregnancy test, you won’t hide by saying that you didn’t promise her anything.
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Reliability and a strong man's shoulder
Every girl is looking for stability and reliability. She wants the relationship to be trusting and serious. This also includes keeping promises; words should not diverge from deeds. Do you know what girls want most? Find a man with whom you can feel completely protected. After all, only with him can such qualities as tenderness, femininity and weakness be manifested.
Someone in a relationship must be strong, and if the guy is not capable of this, the girl has to take his place. By the way, many guys are completely unreasonably convinced of the commercialism and prudence of girls. In fact, for most of them it is not at all important whether their chosen one is rich. Much more significant is the confidence that the man will be able to protect her and her family from any blows of fate. This is a direct continuation of the previous point - financial security is one of the indicators of the overall reliability of the chosen one.
Falling in love on an MRI
From a neurobiological point of view, at this moment we are experiencing a real hormonal storm with an incredible cocktail of dopamine, adrenaline, endorphin and oxytocin (responsible for feelings of anticipation, increased excitability, pleasure and connection).
The combination of these hormones, raging in the blood, just from the mere mention of a lover, appears on a dynamic MRI in the form of flashes of brain activity comparable to the northern lights. Endogenous (formed in the body itself) opiates are also added here, which make us insensitive to physical discomfort. At this moment, the most delightful epithets in relation to each other are born, the need for hugs, kisses, sex, and simply time spent together increases sharply. People at this moment strive for Merger (You're my heart, You're my soul/ You are my heart. You are my soul) and see only this:
a) what is liked, admired, appreciated,
b) how are they similar?
Roughly speaking, the limbic brain, which is responsible for social connections and emotions that these connections form and strengthen, takes power, while the neocortex, responsible for logic and critical thinking, nervously smokes in the hallway.
Is physical strength important?
Guys often think that physical strength and pumped up muscles play a decisive role. Therefore, they spend long hours in gyms, train until they sweat, and then are surprised to notice that their impressive muscles have virtually no effect on the attitude of the opposite sex towards them.
No, of course, girls love strong men who lead the right lifestyle. After all, the health of their future children directly depends on this. But you don’t have to become a bodybuilder to do this; a few workouts a week are enough to stay in good shape.
Attention and gifts
Girls love attentive guys. Moreover, this can manifest itself in different ways. Meeting her after school or work, remembering her mother’s birthday, calling her again and asking how her day went - these small details can greatly influence the overall impression. And, of course, compliments and nice words make all girls happy.
It is worth remembering about gifts. However, they do not necessarily have to be expensive. A simple bouquet or a pleasant little thing just like that, for no reason, sometimes brings much more joy than formal congratulations in honor of a special date.
By the way, let's say a few words about surprises. They are beautiful. And it’s even better if they turn out to be truly successful and desirable. How to find out what a girl wants to receive as a gift? There is one good remedy. You need to hint that a surprise has been prepared for her and invite her to guess which one. Most likely, at first the girl will name what she would like to receive.
Flirting
If a girl lacks emotions, start flirting. What does this mean? Start giving her compliments, but don’t shower her with them. Start noticing her flaws and calling her the animals that have them (for example, “kitty” if the girl scratches, or “fox” if she is cunning).
Also, do not forget about touching, sometimes indecently, so that the girl shows that you go far, but it does not offend you. Continue to harass her, as it were, but do not bring the matter to bed.
You can even hint to a girl that other beauties are interested in you. Let her think that she might lose you.
Inner qualities of the chosen one
Such seemingly not very masculine traits as modesty and sensitivity also attract girls. After all, no one would want to see a dry, callous partner next to them. As for modesty, it means the ability to realistically evaluate one’s merits and avoid boasting. In addition, all women, without exception, are attracted to honest and faithful companions.
And, of course, girls appreciate romance. True, men and women perceive this detail of relationships differently. But this should not stop a guy from doing something nice for his chosen one from time to time: giving her surprises, giving her flowers, or even trying to write a poem for her. How to understand that a girl wants more romance in a relationship? First of all, be more attentive and gentle towards her, and even better, make sure that this problem does not arise at all.
Broken dreams5
In a relationship, a woman expects that she will have her personal space for creativity, development, time to communicate with family and friends. Women who have lived long lives often accuse men of sacrificing their dreams for him. They dreamed of becoming an artist, a poetess, and were fond of fashion. But then he appeared on the horizon and took her away from her plans, made her a child, put on an apron and sent her to the kitchen. Or the same story only with my mother, sisters and girlfriends. For a woman, love is her whole life; she is ready to sacrifice for the sake of feelings. But such victims often kill something mysterious and dreamy in her. Do not deprive a woman of the opportunity for spiritual development and communication.
“Friendship with other women is the main factor influencing women's longevity.” Results of research by Doctor of Psychology Len Syme, University of California, Berkeley.
Sense of humor and intelligence
Girls are attracted to guys who are cheerful and witty and who are able to enjoy life. It’s nice not only to communicate with such people and have a good time, but also to build a family. A good sense of humor sometimes plays a vital role, and an optimistic, cheerful person always has a better chance than an ever-grumpy bore. So the ability to make a girl laugh is already a significant step towards gaining her favor. However, it is important to observe moderation here, since constant and inappropriate gaiety is no less annoying than boring. And one more important point. Do girls want to be made fun of? The answer will be obvious - of course not.
Girls also like smart and educated guys. It is a fact. A man with whom there is something to talk about, who himself can teach his companion something, will always be interesting and attractive. Especially if the mind serves him not only for conversations, but also for action. Therefore, girls also want to see purposeful and ambitious guys next to them. Those who strive to develop and reach new heights.
And the most important thing…
And of course, there is something that comes first for everyone. What girls want most from guys is love. If they choose a young man, then one who will adore them. And not being afraid to talk about it and confirm it with actions.
Girls dream of feeling special, desired and unique, and for this they are ready to forgive their companions for the lack of many other qualities. In addition, love often works miracles and changes a person beyond recognition. And what makes it so beautiful is that people, caring not about their own well-being, but about the happiness of their companion, begin to adapt to each other and acquire new traits that were unusual for them before. Therefore, to find a mate, it is not enough to simply say: “I want a girl!” You need to love and respect your chosen ones, and work with them on relationships.
What do you want from life? Why is it so important to understand what you want from life?
The modern economy requires people to do more and get tired less. And people themselves want to worry less about survival issues, develop more and fill their lives with bright emotions. Topics of personal effectiveness such as time management, self-motivation and self-discipline are gaining popularity.
Personal effectiveness is setting personal goals and achieving them. Many trainings and books on personal effectiveness begin with a call to set goals. Like, having a goal in itself makes you more effective than 90% of people. And it is true. But when a person does not have the habit of setting goals, he formulates it from the desire that first comes to mind. Very soon this desire disappears somewhere, but the goal remains and continues to influence the person, as if from the outside, like a supervisor, generating dissatisfaction with oneself and driving his self-esteem to the floor.
The 21st century provides a huge choice of development paths and great opportunities for realizing your wildest dreams. Successful young people earn a lot of money, travel around the world and do not deny themselves anything. The Internet is teeming with artists, designers, actors, directors, singers, businessmen, politicians, bloggers and writers. They live a bright and eventful life, change the world as they want and do not worry about finances.
A person has never had such a wide choice of options for self-realization until today. But this same endless choice of possibilities creates chaos from desires and a person rushes from one opportunity to another. Chaos pulls the rug out from under your feet and turns life into that swamp of uncertainty. It is impossible to be effective and competitive without defeating this chaos. You can’t take everything from life when you don’t know what exactly is included in this “everything”. You need to know exactly what you want, because high efficiency and a sense of freedom are based on this.
How not to behave
Now that we have figured out a little about what girls want, it’s worth saying a few words about what the fair sex simply cannot stand. First of all, rudeness and rudeness. They disgust most women. Girls also do not tolerate excessive self-confidence and concentration on their own appearance. A guy who endlessly looks in the mirror and straightens his hair will look more funny than attractive.
However, you cannot go to the other extreme - completely forget about taking care of your appearance. Sloppy guys who completely forget about hygiene repel girls no less. Also, infantile and self-doubting young people will not be successful - this goes against traditional ideas about masculinity.
Thus, the question of what a girl wants from a guy turns out to be not so difficult. Of course, this list may change, because all people are different, and everyone has their own vision of an ideal relationship. Therefore, when trying to please a girl, you must always remain yourself and not mislead her, otherwise you can end up in a very awkward situation. After all, almost all girls first of all value the honesty and decency of the chosen one. Therefore, having been deceived, any representative of the fair sex is unlikely to give a second chance.
Errors of the candy-bouquet periodi
Often, wanting to make an impression and achieve a goal, people try to show themselves in the best light. Such cunning turns into a not very good impression in the future. Relationships that have grown into serious ones take off their rose-colored glasses and partners appear before each other with their hearts and souls. A woman falls in love with a man’s non-existent qualities and subsequently demands from him what he cheated in the past. It could be responsibility, romance, attention, honesty.
Sometimes the woman herself is to blame, because in a state of love she added the best masculine qualities to her chosen one. Subsequently, when she opens her eyes and does not find what she has invented, she will not blame herself. She herself believed in her own inventions.
