11 unexpected signs that you are facing a psychopath

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In the ordinary understanding, a psychopath is either a sophisticated maniac like Hannibal Lecter, or a person who expresses his emotions too violently (for some, inadequately). In reality, of course, everything is much more complicated.

A psychopath may appear to be a completely normal, even charming person. And his behavior is not always antisocial - on the contrary, he can be a respected and successful professional. Well, maybe a little fearless - but how can you achieve success without courage?

But at the same time, such traits as a reduced capacity for compassion and repentance, deceit, self-centeredness and superficiality of emotional reactions appear.

This set of qualities turns a psychopath into a ruthless manipulator. That’s why it can be so difficult to determine who is in front of us: a charming person who has achieved career heights through hard work, or an insidious intriguer who, given the opportunity, will deal with anyone without regret. Recent research gives us some clues.

Holds certain positions

According to an anonymous survey conducted by Oxford University psychologist Kevin Dutton while writing his book The Wisdom of Psychopaths, psychopaths are most often found among people in the following professions and positions:

• CEO;
• advocate;
• media representative (radio or television);
• Sales Manager;
• surgeon;
• journalist;
• police officer;
• clergyman;
• Chef;
• civil servant.

Of course, this does not mean that every boss or lawyer has a personality disorder. Most likely, in these positions it is simply easier for psychopaths to realize their potential and achieve success.

In addition, it is worth considering that the survey covered only UK residents and questions remained about the purity of the study. However, Dutton’s data indirectly confirms the statement of Corporate psychopaths common and can wreak havoc in business, researcher says Australian psychologist Nathan Brooks. According to his information, the proportion of psychopaths among Australian top managers is 21%. That's a lot.

And during his research, Dutton found out that psychopaths prefer the Financial Times to other newspapers. Apparently, the analytical press helps them become leaders.

Phase 8: Anger and Justification

By the time victims of psychopaths seek help, they feel intense anger at the person who manipulated or abused them and want to get even.

Anger and the need for justification are natural psychological reactions and an integral part of recovery. Anger may be a result of residual feelings that victims constantly felt, but because of fear and resignation were unable to express. It is very important for the victim to work on his anger with a therapist.

The need for justification is likely to be satisfied (at least for some people) by confirmation that the person they have victimized is a psychopath. According to many people, the more they learned about the psychopathic process and, accordingly, understood it, the better they felt.

It is important to work through your anger with a mental health professional, as thinking about past hurts will only make things worse, increasing the effects of trauma.

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The dark side of empathy. Why empathy in itself does not make us or the world around us better

Some people (in fact, most of us) strive to expose the psychopath and show the world his true colors. At this stage, it is not advisable to talk widely about your feelings or make accusations on social networks, emails, messages and publications on the Internet.

First of all, assess your current emotional state. You may not be able to think or act rationally at the moment. In addition, in a weakened state, you will have a difficult time dealing with a retaliatory strike.

If you are the victim of a real crime, you must report it to the authorities. At the same time, it is logical to warn friends about what behavior patterns to watch out for - such a step will benefit people and even protect someone from the snares of a psychopath.

Questions to Consider

What do you have that might interest a psychopath? Do you know your weaknesses and pain points?

Has anyone tried to manipulate you using them? Did he succeed?

Prefers the night

According to the study Creatures of the night: Chronotypes and the Dark Triad traits, published by Australian scientists in 2013, psychopaths are more night owls than larks. This conclusion was made for all representatives of the so-called dark triad. In addition to psychopaths, it includes people who are characterized by narcissism and Machiavellianism.

As stated in this study, representatives of the "dark triad", like many other predators, prefer the dark time of day, when others sleep and become more defenseless.

Recognize immediately

Many people are interested in how to defeat a psychopath and not become a victim of his intrigues. Unfortunately, it is impossible to cope with a psychopath. You can only stay away from him and reduce communication to nothing. This is why it is so important to learn how to identify a psychopathic personality type. And it doesn’t matter at all how a person became a psychopath - you should stay away from him in any case.

To identify a person with a similar type of mental structure, you only need to carefully observe. A psychopath will definitely manifest himself. He seems ideal, but little by little he undermines your self-esteem and self-confidence, tries to play on feelings of pity, and requires constant attention to himself. Here's how to recognize a psychopath and not become his victim - carefully observe and analyze his behavior, and if there are signs of deviations, immediately stop contacting him.

Likes bitter things

The study Individual differences in bitter taste preferences are associated with antisocial personality traits, published in the peer-reviewed scientific journal Appetite in 2015, proved that psychopaths and sadists like bitter foods. Especially gin and tonic, strong black coffee, dark chocolate, broccoli, cabbage, radishes, and - horror of horrors - strong beer.

Addiction to bitter foods, according to researchers from the University of Innsbruck, may be associated with Machiavellianism, narcissism, sadism, aggression and other antisocial character traits. Scientists believe that the reason is as follows.

Evolutionarily, most people do not tolerate the taste of bitterness, because in nature most things that are poisonous or inedible taste bitter.

But psychopaths are different from most: they may eat less-than-tasty food just to diversify their experience, and they don't care even if the food isn't good for them. While sociable, pleasant and balanced people, on the contrary, dislike bitter taste.

True, Dr. Stephen Meyers, a philosophy professor at Roosevelt University, recommends Are You Really a Psychopath If You Drink Black Coffee? treat the research results of your colleagues with caution. According to him, it is easier to identify a psychopath or sociopath by the way they treat the waiter in a restaurant, rather than by the food they order.

What can you do? Path to recovery

Many readers ask what can be done. And then we provide a short, but, unfortunately, generalized list of recommendations and suggestions on how to behave if you have become a victim of a psychopath.

Gather information

• Gather all available information related to the situation: diaries, notebooks, notes, emails, bank account statements, court and medical records, and telephone call transcripts.
• Don't write anything on social networks! Save and print any online information that may be useful to you.

Assess the damage

• Review your finances, including all charges on credit cards, bank account, and sales documents. Remove the psychopath as a beneficiary of joint accounts if possible. If not, close your accounts. If you find signs of fraud, prepare a detailed report.
• Seek professional help to scan your computer and phone for malware. (Some victims have reported to us that they found tracking apps on their phones and spyware on their PCs!)
• See a professional to evaluate your psychological and emotional state.

Conduct an “audit” of friends and acquaintances

• Make a list of your friends and acquaintances and remember who warned you about the true nature of a psychopath, who helped him, and who knew nothing about what was happening. At the same time, you can think about which of them could support you. Include your family members too.

Record your story

• Collect all documents in one place and sort them in chronological order, as well as by categories: finances, damage to reputation and position in society, and so on.
• Referring to your notes, write a story about your relationship with the psychopath. Most likely, its first version will seem like a stream of consciousness, incoherent, full of complaints, accusations and emotions.
• Edit your story. Ask a friend for help or hire a professional editor. Do this to make the story readable and understandable to outsiders, such as government officials or a lawyer. Aim for two to three pages of text. But the main thing is to describe your experience in detail on paper.

Predict your future with or without a psychopath

• Is there still a psychopath in your life? Will he stay there anytime soon? The answer depends on whether you are married to him, whether you have children together, whether you are bound by legal obligations (for example, a jointly purchased house), or whether you are related.
• If a psychopath dumps you, consider yourself lucky. Start rebuilding your life.
• But if you are legally related to a psychopath through shared property, marriage or children, prepare for a protracted battle. You can’t do this without the help of professionals.

Plan your action strategy

• Visit a support group for victims of psychopaths, hear other people's stories, and read resources designed to help such people. Ask questions anonymously, without revealing details that the psychopath might use to identify you.
• If you feel unsafe, contact law enforcement and ask for protection and shelter.
• Talk to a lawyer.

Prepare for a psychopath's response

• Hostage taking. A psychopath may use your children or property as a weapon against you to force you to pay for expensive legal help and prolong the conflict. He may promise to help you raise your children and then fail to show up on time to disrupt your schedule, or make empty promises to take the kids on vacation.
• Siege. As in medieval warfare, this strategy aims to force the victim to capitulate by isolating and depleting his resources. As a rule, this is associated with a variety of actions: for example, parking a car in front of your car to block the exit, harassment in person or online, etc., financial pressure (petty squabbles in court in order to delay the breakup and drain your resources), social influence (trying to turn your friends against you). We even know of cases where some psychopaths managed to win the victim's lawyers over to their side!
• Sabotage. A psychopath may call your employer and try to get you fired. He can waste a lot of money from your bank account and credit card, and also tarnish your name on social networks. Do not give in to provocations: continue to scrupulously document all his actions.

Your ultimate goal is to completely stop contact (physical, emotional and psychological) with the psychopath. This is the only way you can start life again.

Takes a lot of selfies

It would seem that people who love selfies are sociable and want to share their impressions with others, while real psychopaths are embarrassed by their appearance. But it is not always the case.

The study The Dark Triad and trait self-objectification as predictors of men's use and self-presentation behaviors on social networking sites by psychologists Jesse Fox and Margaret Rooney from Ohio University revealed a connection between the desire to take selfies all the time and tendencies towards Machiavellianism, narcissism and psychopathy. Participants who were suspected of having a psychopathic disorder spent more time on social media than others and took more photographs of themselves.

To be fair, it should be said that only men aged 18 to 40 participated in the experiment. So, girls, you can continue taking seductive selfies as much as you like - you are above suspicion. Although…

Self-destruction

Can psychopaths be afraid? Severe psychopathy is a high risk for self-aggression to be as great as aggression toward others (WHJM, unpublished data). A significant number of psychopaths die violently within a relatively short period of time after their discharge from forensic psychiatric facilities as a result of their own behavior (for example, as a result of risky driving or involvement in dangerous situations) (Black et al., 1996; Martens, 1997). Psychopaths may feel that all life, including their own, is worthless (Martens, 1997; Palermo and Martens, in press).

Engaged in creativity

According to research Investigating the prosocial psychopath model of the creative personality: Evidence from traits and psychophysiology by Dr. Adrian Galang from Masaryk University, psychopathic personality traits sometimes correlate with significant creative achievements.

According to Galang, psychopaths are not necessarily antisocial and criminally inclined. There are also prosocial individuals who use their inherent courage and disregard for society's expectations to realize their creative potential.

Such psychopaths are characterized by high creativity.

For example, Van Gogh became an outstanding artist, despite the fact that he was crazy enough to cut off his own ear. Picasso, who showed the traits of a psychopath, at the same time created a new direction in painting - cubism. Beethoven was prone to sadism and treated those close to him rather cruelly, but he wrote magnificent music. So the stereotype that brilliant people are partly insane is not unfounded.

Advances in treatment

In the last decade, neurobiological explanations have become available for many of the personality traits of psychopaths. For example, impulsivity, recklessness/irresponsibility, hostility and aggressiveness may be determined by abnormal levels of neurochemicals including monoamine oxidase (MAO), serotonin (5-HT) and 5-hydroxyindoleacetic acid (5-HIAA), triiodothyronine (T3), free thyroxine (T4 ), testosterone, cortisol, adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH), and hormones of the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal and hypothalamic-pituitary-genital axis (WHJM, unpublished data). Other characteristics, such as sensation seeking and a failure to learn from experience (Lykken, 1995), may be associated with underactivation of the cerebral cortex (Martens, 2000, 1997; Zuckerman, 1994). Sensation seeking may also be associated with low levels of MAO and cortisol and high concentrations of gonadal hormones, as well as decreased prefrontal gray matter volume (Raine, 1996; Raine et al., 2000; Zuckerman, 1994). Many psychopaths can thus be considered, at least to some extent, to be victims of neurobiologically determined behavioral abnormalities, which in turn create a permanent gap between them and the rest of the world. It may be possible to reduce psychopathic traits such as sensation seeking, impulsivity, aggression, and associated emotional pain through psychotherapy, psychopharmacology, and/or neurofeedback therapy.

Long-term (at least five years) psychotherapy appears to be effective for some psychopaths because psychopathic personality traits may be reduced (Dolan, 1998; Dolan and Coid, 1993; Sanislow and McGlashan, 1998).

Psychotherapeutic treatment alone may not be enough to achieve improvement. Psychopharmacological treatments can help normalize neurobiological functioning and associated behavioral/personality traits (Martens, in press, 2001, 2000). Lithium has been impressive in the treatment of antisocial, hostile, and aggressive behavior (Bloom and Kupfer, 1994; Sheard et al., 1976; Tupin et al., 1973). Hollander (1999) found that mood stabilizers such as divalproex (Depakote), selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs) and antipsychotics have proven effective in treating aggression and affective instability in impulsive patients. To date, there have been no controlled studies of psychopharmacological treatments for other core psychopathic features.

Insufficient cortical activation and low autonomic activity-reactivity can be significantly reduced using adaptive neurofeedback techniques (Martens, 2001; Raine, 1996).

Norman (not his real name) was raised by his aunt because his parents were divorced and no one was interested or caring about him. As a child and teenager, he had numerous encounters with law enforcement agencies due to car thefts, theft, theft, fraud, and assault. Twice he was sent to reform school. When he turned 21, he was convicted of armed robbery and served a year and a half in prison. His only close friend was also a violent criminal; Norman had many short-term sexual relationships with various women. At the age of 29, he killed two strangers in a bar who insulted him and was sentenced to forensic psychiatric treatment. Norman was diagnosed with psychopathy according to the Hare Psychopathy Checklist (Hare et al., 1990).

Norman showed slight improvement over seven years of behavioral therapy, but became less and less motivated. The forensic psychiatric hospital considered him incurable and intended to abandon all attempts at treatment. Norman's lawyer insisted on a forensic neurological examination, which subsequently found that Norman suffered from severe deficits in cortical activation, disorders of serotonin and monoamine oxidase (5-HT and MAO) metabolism, and concentration problems.

Norman was prescribed d, l-fenfluramine (Pondimin), a drug that promotes the release of serotonin. (Fenfluramine was voluntarily withdrawn from the American market in 1997 - Ed.) With the use of therapeutic doses of the drug (0.2 mg/kg to 0.4 mg/kg), a significant dose-dependent decrease in impulsive and aggressive reactions began to occur. A month later, monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOI pargyline [Eutonyl], 10 mg/kg) and a course of psychodynamic psychotherapy were added to the treatment structure. Pargyline produced some normalization of his electroencephalogram (EEG) patterns, and the dose was then titrated to 20 mg/kg over five months. Neurofeedback therapy was started after two months and continued for the next 15 months. His EEG gradually returned to normal and his concentration and attention potential increased. Norman continued to receive d,l-fenfluramine and psychotherapy for two years, after which he was discharged from the court unit. He voluntarily continued psychotherapy for an additional three years and, in the four years since his release, he has not relapsed.

Listens to rap

Perhaps when you hear the word “psychopath,” you imagine a sophisticated maniac listening to classical music to the accompaniment of the screams of his victim. Or a long-haired, pale devil worshiper who prefers heavy metal.

But psychologist Pascal Wallisch of New York University analyzed the Playlist of the Lambs: psychopaths may have distinct musical preferences and concluded that people who score highest on tests of psychopathy like to listen to rap music. These subjects were most attracted to the song Blackstreet No Diggity, but they also liked Eminem's hit Lose Yourself.

But classic rock, jazz and pop music are of little interest to psychopaths - fans of the compositions My Sharona by The Knack and Titanium by Sia turned out to be the most normal and balanced people.

A psychiatrist is not a sentence

“Lenta.ru:” Oksana Anatolyevna, but you understand that going to a psychoneurological dispensary is a stigma for a Russian person. If people find out about visits to a psychiatrist, a person will hardly be able to avoid teasing and ridicule. His friends will begin to feel sorry for his wife, and she herself will periodically call her husband a moron. Not to mention the problems with obtaining a driver's license, hunting license, and finding employment.

“First of all, I tell you with full responsibility,” here Dr. Makushkina is on her territory, “that seeking advice from a psychiatrist does not at all mean registration. In accordance with the Law “On Psychiatric Care” there is consultative and therapeutic assistance and dispensary observation. The first is carried out as a person applies, and no one will register him. The law stipulates that only persons suffering from a chronic and protracted mental disorder with severe, persistent or frequently exacerbating painful manifestations are subject to dispensary observation. There are clear indications. Moreover, a person cannot be taken under dispensary observation by the attending physician, but only by a commission of psychiatrists. Restrictions on obtaining a driver's license and the right to own a gun are associated exclusively with severe mental disorders such as schizophrenia. So don’t think that if you go to a psychiatrist, you won’t be given a license later.

Secondly, after its debut, a severe mental disorder most often has a chronic course. If a person stops maintenance therapy, their condition will worsen. As soon as relatives notice a resumption of the disease, they need to contact a psychiatrist. The main thing is to understand: severe mental disorders do not go away on their own.

Thirdly, you are talking about a driver’s license and a hunting license... You know, there are cases when people with severe mental disorders, having a gun, use it. Are you sure such people need guns and cars?

FSBI "SSC SSP named after V.P. Serbian"

Photo: Grigory Sysoev / RIA Novosti

Likes to have fun

Psychopaths are bored all the time, and they are ready to do anything to relieve their boredom. Crazy men like Ted Bundy killed young women just for fun. But even if a psychopath is not a killer, he still wants to do something like that - such people lack adrenaline and bright emotions, and they are unable to enjoy simple, everyday joys.

The nervous system of a psychopath is designed in such a way that he simply needs to continue to do exciting, exciting things all the time in order to feel normal and maintain the desired level of his arousal.

Robert Shug

neurocriminologist and clinical psychologist

Psychiatrist Eric Monasterio found in Self-Transcendence in Mountaineering and BASE Jumping that people who exhibit psychopathic traits engage in extreme sports such as BASE jumping and mountaineering to relieve boredom.

And many of these athletes exhibit characteristics similar to those of psychopaths - the search for new sensations, disdain for danger, excessive self-confidence and risk-taking. Monasterio's research is confirmed by Psychiatric Aspects of Extreme Sports: Three Case Studies and another psychiatrist, Jan Tofler.

In addition, the fight against boredom can manifest itself in less extreme ways. For example, Dr. Randall Salekin states 13 signs you're dealing with a psychopath, according to experts, that psychopaths are more likely than others to encourage their colleagues to go somewhere together to drink, have fun and look for adventure.

Signs of psychopathy

Psychopathic deviations are accompanied by a number of symptomatic manifestations. People suffering from the disorder are not capable of long-term relationships. Pathology is often manifested by the desire to establish relationships only with those people who can bring material benefit. The patient deliberately ignores existing norms of behavior. The following signs may indicate the presence of this disorder:

• superficial charm;
• hypertrophied sense of self-esteem;
• rancor;
• short sleep duration;
• pathological deceit;
• outbursts of rage;
• inconsistency in actions;
• frequent change of place of work;
• sexual depravity;
• inability to assess the degree of danger;
• frequent change of character masks;
• accusing the opponent of shortcomings and lies at the slightest dispute;
• own set of moral laws;
• presence of high intellectual abilities;
• charm and visual attractiveness;
• out-of-the-box thinking.

Psychopaths are characterized by attacks of groundless jealousy, irresponsibility and impulsiveness. Such individuals often try to sow chaos and discord around them, because... By quarreling other people, they get pleasure from it. They lead a parasitic lifestyle. They cannot be relied upon in an emergency.

In men

Men suffering from psychopathy are distinguished by thoughtful tactics of behavior in society. They often hide or smooth out facts to their advantage. The behavior of a psychopath in most cases is hypocritical, so in public and in the family they are 2 different people.

Such a man can achieve high success in business or at work. Present yourself to colleagues and friends in the best possible light. At the same time, physical and psychological violence at home is the norm. It is extremely difficult for any woman to leave such a man. They deftly manipulate feelings and can threaten and intimidate.

Among women

A psychopath is characterized by emotionality and hot temper. Such women are unbalanced. Despite their outward goodwill, psychopaths are extremely hostile towards others. Especially often their aggression is directed at other women, communication with whom cannot bring them material benefit. The patient is dismissive of the feelings and problems of her family.

Patients suffering from this disorder have too much selfishness. It begins to appear in adolescence. Despite her attractiveness in the eyes of men, such a woman is not able to experience feelings of love and affection. Such women often build relationships on cold calculation, leaving their partner as soon as personal interest is realized or a better candidate appears. The patient is not able to love even her children. They are often the ones who suffer the most from her words and actions.

In children

Psychopathy can have different manifestations in childhood, because During this period, the child is just learning to communicate with others. Some children already at an early age acquire the skills to manipulate the feelings of others and show signs of selfishness. In other cases, children with this disorder have difficulty communicating with peers. They gradually hone their manipulation skills. Possible behavioral problems.



Has many short novels

Because psychopaths are constantly bored, they quickly become bored with their relationships and rush out to find new ones. The study The dark side of love and life satisfaction: Associations with intimate relationships, psychopathy and Machiavellianism by British psychologist Thomas Chamorro-Premuzic found that people with this disorder tend to have short affairs, charming their partners with their charm, and then leaving them. Sex in this case is not an end in itself or a way to express affection.

Through affairs, a psychopath gets pleasure from dominating a partner or simply nurtures his ego with love victories.

However, psychopaths are still capable of sometimes experiencing affection. Researcher Christian Keysers in the Netherlands established Brain research shows psychopathic criminals do not lack empathy, but fail to use it automatically, that such people usually do not tend to feel compassion for others, but still the parts of the brain responsible for empathy work for them.

When a psychopath understands that he is expected to show empathy, he uses it - not automatically, like a normal person, but through an effort of will. This explains why psychopaths, despite their coldness, can adapt well socially.

Phase 1: The Seductiveness of Psychopathic Fiction

First impressions can be deceiving. Unfortunately, most of us may initially like a psychopath, because undeniable charm, good looks, eloquence, as well as skillful use of flattery and self-indulgence create an attractive image.

However, the impression made by a psychopath is reminiscent of the beautiful cover of a bad book. Unfortunately, there is one difference between books and people: we rarely buy a book without flipping through it or without at least reading reviews, the same goes for buying a TV or a car - you are unlikely to take such a step without first studying their characteristics, but the mask of a psychopath is often taken at face value.

Because psychopaths present themselves in different ways, you may fall for their bait many times. Therefore, it is wise to be cautious (and even suspicious) in at least a general assessment of any new social contact, especially if it has the potential to affect your life in some way.

At a minimum, you should update your first impression of a person as you learn more about them, and have escape routes in case you expose them or become uncomfortable around them.

Maintains friendly relations with exes

If you dated a very strange guy (or an extremely eccentric girl), decided to break up and he (or she) finally offers to “stay friends” - you should seriously think about this proposal.

Don’t think that every ex of yours who offered to remain friends has psychopathic tendencies. But still, psychopaths are very interested in maintaining contact with their exes for selfish purposes, such as constant access to sex or borrowed money. At the same time, they do not care at all what emotional impact they have on their ex-partners.

Paulette Sherman

psychologist, author of the book “Dating from the Inside”

According to the study Staying friends with an ex: Sex and dark personality traits predict motivations for post-relationship friendship by psychologists Justin Mogilsky and Lisa Welling, psychopaths are very willing to stay close to their ex-halves, maintaining “friendship.” There is no altruism - they view these relationships as a resource, trying to get from them what they need.

Phase 4: Self-doubt, guilt and denial in psychopathic manipulation

The unprincipled, deceitful and manipulative behavior of psychopaths often leaves the victim baffled and destructive. Some victims are tormented by doubts and blame themselves for what happened, while others deny the problem altogether. In any case, doubts and fears about psychopaths turn into self-doubt.

The situation is greatly aggravated if the victim cannot convince others, including family members and friends, that the cause of the trouble is not her, but someone else. “Everyone thought I was the problem,” is a phrase often repeated by those who have dealt with a psychopath.

Unfortunately, it is difficult to convince a person who is the victim of a psychopath that he is not aware of what is happening. Even if presented with evidence, such as a suspicious motel bill or mysterious charges on a personal credit card, he will continue to deny everything and, like a psychopath, accuse others of falsifying information, dismiss the facts as a misunderstanding, or claim that none of this is anyone's business because he trusts psychopath.

It is very difficult to help a person who, being unsure of himself, denies the obvious. The best thing family members, friends, or co-workers can do in this case is to provide victims with the support they need by recommending that they seek help from an employee assistance program or mental health professionals.

The situation becomes more complicated if the psychopath has managed to convince those around you, including family and friends, that you are the problem! This state of affairs can be devastating and even make you question your own mental health.