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Have you been communicating for a long time with a young man who just can’t decide to verbally express his affection for you? This depresses and disappoints you; it becomes completely unclear what to expect from the future. How to understand a man. Why is a man afraid of the woman he is in love with and what stops him from taking the first step. Let's understand male psychology.
When a man says “I love you” he is most likely lying
Unfortunately for lovers, men (and women too!) often utter words of love without feeling this deep feeling towards their partner. It is painful and unpleasant to destroy illusions
who sincerely believe in the love of female representatives, but sometimes this must be done in order to save a woman’s heart from the wounds that a man’s lies can inflict on it in the long term.
Read also: Why does the iPhone turn off in the cold?
That is why every woman and girl should know only two signs
when a man, saying
“I love you,”
is most likely deceiving his passion.
Why is it so hard to say “I love you”?
Girls, write in the comments when was the last time you heard words of love from your partner. Let's find out how often representatives of the stronger sex are ready to share their feelings!
How many misunderstandings and resentments there are in a couple because someone cannot admit their emotions! Girls are forced to determine the love of guys by indirect signs. Isn't it easier to say the cherished three words to your beloved?
It turns out that the reason lies in the peculiarities of male psychology. For a long time, men fulfilled the evolutionary role of hunter, warrior, and protector. To cope effectively with these tasks, they needed to learn to turn off their emotions. Emotionality was cultivated in women - they raised children, helped the weak and wounded. To do this, it is important to be able to empathize.
What is the result? Guys can't handle their feelings! They perceive any strong experiences - for example, the feeling of love for a girl - as stress and subconsciously block them. This does not mean that there is no love - it’s just that men get lost when they realize that they are hopelessly in love. To better understand male psychology, read the articles in the “Ideal love relationship” section.
What to do if he doesn't confess his love
We have already agreed that the option of “confessing first” is cut off. Of course, this would simplify a lot. But no means no. Then what methods and manipulations remain? Depending on the reason why a man does not take the initiative, there are different ways to solve the problem. Let's imagine at least universal ones.
- Positive attitude. If a man is not sure, if he has already had a negative experience, if he is looking for unrealistic “suitable conditions,” he simply needs to know that you are interested in him. And this will have to be emphasized in every possible way. Be happy with him, smile more when you are with him, stay in a good mood. Don't miss the chance to help the guy and provide moral support. All this is called a positive attitude or positive communication. Feeling that you are interested in him, the man may make up his mind.
- Interest in his opinion. More often you are interested in what kind of women he likes best, what style of communication he prefers, where he likes to go, and so on. Don't think that men are stupid and don't take hints. A normal guy will understand that you are interested for a reason. This information will help you look better in his eyes. It will also come in handy in the future, when you start a serious relationship.
- Candid hints. Yes, I’m almost the first to admit this. But still, making a hint is much easier than the first step. There are many options for hints. For example, you can say that the guy is important to you, that you are ready to change your plans for him, refuse other offers. Emphasize that this person occupies a special place in your life. Perhaps the most thick-skinned and slow-witted man should understand that it’s time to develop relationships.
Sometimes you can come across recommendations that you can provoke a man to take the first step by causing jealousy. Questionable statement: If a man is not confident in himself or is not confident in you, that you are his future, jealousy will not provoke a declaration of love. Quite the opposite: he will decide that you are one of thousands of superficial, unreliable, frivolous ladies. If you use jealousy as a means of manipulation, then only with a self-confident and determined man.
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What are the conclusions?
It is not necessary to wait for the first step from a man. In modern society, a woman can do it too. But, if you are not mentally ready for such a decisive step, first understand the reasons for his passivity. Then proceed to active actions: create an atmosphere in which the guy wants to confess, make subtle or direct hints. There is no guarantee that this will lead to success. But the chance that a man will confess and try to develop a relationship will at least increase.
What kind of men do women like?
| Way | How to act as a woman |
| Don't be intrusive |
|
| Don't show off your eyes |
|
| Be tolerant | Give up your desire to dominate everything if you meet the man of your dreams. Give him the right to make responsible decisions and do not humiliate him if something is done wrong. |
| Show tenderness and gentleness |
|
| Don't be picky | The emerging fear of difficulties, provoked by your hysteria about the wrong cafe, can frighten the applicant, and he will give up the idea of getting you as a life partner. |
Find out more what kind of guys girls like: What girls like in guys is the most important thing for them
What should women do?
It is rare to meet an ardent macho who will openly talk about his attitude towards a woman. Most often, they hide all their experiences somewhere deep in their souls. And any emotional manifestations are considered by representatives of the stronger half of humanity to be a sign of weakness.
As a result of a long-term relationship, such a pleasant word for a woman’s ear, “I love,” may completely disappear from everyday life. However, lovely ladies do not sit idly by.
Every day they look for the symptoms of falling in love that they know and in the end, oddly enough, they find it. Take the initiative.
How men show their feelings
When girls wonder why a guy doesn't tell them about his feelings, they forget that men are rational. They show their attitude towards their loved one through their actions. Actions that will tell you that a young man is really in love:
- Present. A clear manifestation of serious feelings is expressed through signs of attention. The most popular gifts include flowers, sweets, and cute little things. If you're already married, this includes groceries, clothes, and anything your man buys for you.
- Attention. If your lover enjoys spending time with you, then he is definitely attracted to you. This could be a walk together, going to the cinema, or just watching a movie at home.
- Support. You are dear to your chosen one if he takes care of you. A guy in love will calm you down when his girlfriend is in a bad mood, inquire about her well-being, and go to the pharmacy if she is sick.
- Physical affection. It is easier for men to show their love through contact with a woman. This could be gentle touches, kisses. With the help of sex, he can overcome the emotional barrier and finally show how much he loves his partner.
- Communication with relatives. When a man loves a woman, he will treat her loved ones with respect. He understands that this is important to you, so he will try.
READ Fell in love with a married woman: fight for your happiness or let go?
Reasons for separation
Every couple has their own reasons for breaking up. Some rushed into relationships, others lost their feelings, and others were stupid. Often people fall in love and think that it will last a lifetime. They are in a hurry to live together, but in everyday life it turns out that they are completely different. On this basis, conflicts occur and, as a result, separation.
In a long-term relationship, a man and a woman get used to each other and feel their partner at the level of intuition. And if a breakup occurs, the pain in the heart torments for a long time. Not everyone succeeds in completely erasing a person from life right away, because anger, resentment, anger persists for some time.
Despite the fact that now people choose their own mates, some families still maintain ancient foundations. Parents look for a suitable match for their children, match them at a young age, and arrange a wedding when they reach adulthood. If the newlyweds are lucky and manage to fall in love with each other, they live happily. But it also happens that you fail to understand your partner even in simple things. After living together for some time, the couple separates.
Who should confess their love first?
Perhaps a man is not obligated to make the first move. Then why do women expect this? It's simple: recognition from the man himself inspires confidence. The girl immediately understands that she is needed and can count on further development of relationships, marriage, and a happy family. But if a man does not confess, everything is much more complicated. A woman, of course, can try to open up herself. But women's pride, self-doubt, and fear of being ridiculed do not allow this.
There is another reason why it is difficult for a woman to confess her love first. She feels that she is imposing herself on the man or guy. When this happens, the man finds himself in a more advantageous situation. It seems like he remains free. The woman independently takes upon herself the responsibility of “dragging” the relationship further on her own. If the relationship does not work out, she herself will be to blame. So it turns out that it is better to wait for a man to take the first step than to take it yourself.
What to do if he doesn't confess his love
We have already agreed that the option of “confessing first” is cut off. Of course, this would simplify a lot. But no means no. Then what methods and manipulations remain? Depending on the reason why a man does not take the initiative, there are different ways to solve the problem. Let's imagine at least universal ones.
- Positive attitude. If a man is not sure, if he has already had a negative experience, if he is looking for unrealistic “suitable conditions,” he simply needs to know that you are interested in him. And this will have to be emphasized in every possible way. Be happy with him, smile more when you are with him, stay in a good mood. Don't miss the chance to help the guy and provide moral support. All this is called a positive attitude or positive communication. Feeling that you are interested in him, the man may make up his mind.
- Interest in his opinion. More often you are interested in what kind of women he likes best, what style of communication he prefers, where he likes to go, and so on. Don't think that men are stupid and don't take hints. A normal guy will understand that you are interested for a reason. This information will help you look better in his eyes. It will also come in handy in the future, when you start a serious relationship.
- Candid hints. Yes, I’m almost the first to admit this. But still, making a hint is much easier than the first step. There are many options for hints. For example, you can say that the guy is important to you, that you are ready to change your plans for him, refuse other offers. Emphasize that this person occupies a special place in your life. Perhaps the most thick-skinned and slow-witted man should understand that it’s time to develop relationships.
Sometimes you can come across recommendations that you can provoke a man to take the first step by causing jealousy. Questionable statement: If a man is not confident in himself or is not confident in you, that you are his future, jealousy will not provoke a declaration of love. Quite the opposite: he will decide that you are one of thousands of superficial, unreliable, frivolous ladies. If you use jealousy as a means of manipulation, then only with a self-confident and determined man.
Actions are more important than words
As you can see, there are many conflicting reasons why representatives of the stronger sex do not want or are not ready to talk about love. It may take some time before your loved one tells you the cherished three words. Dont be upset. Yes, girls “love with their ears,” but for guys their deeds and actions are much more important. If a partner is there in difficult times, supports and cares, gives gifts - can you doubt his love?
Try to channel your doubts into a constructive direction: develop yourself, increase your self-esteem, work on your relationships. I provide effective tools for improving your life in the online course “Secrets of Women’s Happiness.” Here you will not only understand what behavior indicates the sincere love of men, but also learn how to maintain passion in them for many years.
Girls, how important do you think it is to talk to each other about love?
