Who is a cynic and what is cynicism - signs, reasons and how to behave with such people

What constitutes cynicism is, in simple words, a quality of a person, one might even say a character trait. Cynicism is often perceived as a negative manifestation. But cynics may be disliked and considered bad people. But in fact, cynicism may simply be a defensive reaction of a kind and good person who has suffered serious psychological trauma.

Usually, cynics are not born, but become after they receive a lot of pain from other people and life circumstances. But let’s consider in more detail and from a psychological point of view what cynicism is and who cynics are, and how to learn to quickly recognize them.

In simple words about what cynicism is

Cynicism is, in simple words, a character trait in which a person denies the manifestations of higher feelings and motives in the form of love, sympathy, selflessness, and sacrifice.

A cynical person is convinced that love is just an illusion, just a chemical reaction and an imposed attitude. Cynical people think that sincere and selfless love is just a fiction.

Cynics show a negative attitude towards various universal human values ​​- love, pity, compassion, mercy, sympathy. Cynics neglect these values ​​and mock them. According to the cynic, the reason for these values ​​lies in commercialism and the desire to assert oneself.

Such thinking gives rise to reflection and critical conclusions. A cynic person has difficulty adapting to changes, has a negative attitude towards them, does not rely on feelings and emotions, and is guided only by common sense.

Cynicism from Lat. “cynismus” means a person’s frank, defiant, dismissive and contemptuous attitude towards the moral norms, values ​​and ideas of other people.

Someone will be horrified and ask: “Does the word “cynicism” suggest “pessimism” as a pair? No not always. A pessimist is someone whose hopes for the world were not fulfilled, but they were there. The cynic came closest to the man of the absurd, Camus. He never had these hopes. Because, as the French thinker wrote: “Reason is sterile, but there is nothing higher than reason.”

But there are not only negative sides to cynicism. And not all cynics are bad people.

History of the term

Cynicism came to us from the ancient teachings of the Cynics. They preferred freedom from various rules and naturalness, considering them unacceptable. Rules and conventions significantly worsened their lives, they sought to get rid of them. The Cynics also tried to significantly limit their own needs, preferring to follow their nature.

How did the Cynics free themselves from rules and conventions? They isolated themselves from society, did not follow the laws of communities and the state, preferring their own. Religious and cultural customs seemed unacceptable to them, they sought to get rid of them. In some cases, education was perceived extremely poorly by the Cynics. They considered it a sign of bad upbringing. At the same time, illiteracy seemed to them a blessing.

Moral and ethical standards seemed to them a universal evil. Among the famous philosophers who adhere to the Cynic movement, one can highlight Crates Diogenes of Sinope. He preached alienation from generally accepted rules, considering them the product of evil and ignorant people. Proponents of the doctrine did not consider social norms to be correct.

In our time, cynicism has acquired slightly different features. A cynical person, just like cynics, does not believe that he should follow generally accepted rules. However, in this case, he simply seeks his own benefit in every matter, and is extremely dismissive of the opinions of others. In some cases, cynicism reaches the point of absurdity.

Pros and cons of cynicism

Cynicism has not only disadvantages, but also advantages:

  • Cynicism allows you not to fuss, but to call things by their proper names . In some situations this is necessary. A cynic does not beat around the bush, does not allow selfish and dishonest people to take advantage of him, and without a shadow of a doubt gets rid of their company.
  • Cynicism helps to look at the situation sensibly . Having thrown away the rose-colored glasses, a person immediately understands what the truth is. He does not justify offenders and ill-wishers, soberly assessing other people's intentions and actions.
  • Cynicism can protect . Cynics are confident in themselves and rarely fall into the position of the weak. Healthy cynicism does not allow you to “swallow” the rudeness, tactlessness and intrusiveness of others. Cynics easily fend off blows, protecting themselves from the influence of unworthy individuals.
  • Cynicism can help you make the right decision . Having discarded unnecessary illusions, weaknesses, hopes and emotions, a person soberly assesses the current situation and acts based on real facts, and not guesses, dreams and assumptions. Cynics often achieve the highest results in business and quickly climb the career ladder.
  • A person prone to healthy cynicism knows how to achieve his goals . On the path to great achievements, fears and thoughts about public opinion often interfere, but cynics are deprived of this.

Disadvantages of cynicism:

  • Cynics seem to others to be callous and evil people , which can interfere in some areas of life.
  • Cynics often have no friends due to their penchant for direct or covert insults.
  • Some cynics evoke pity , and this is clearly not the effect they would like to achieve.
  • Cynics are prone to isolation and a narrow range of emotions , which gradually limits their social circle.
  • Cynicism denies important human values ​​that help in achieving happiness and satisfaction in life.

Psychologists believe that people who develop “healthy” cynicism have a stronger and more stable psyche, are less susceptible to stress and are not inclined to fall into the role of a victim. To some extent, a share of cynicism is useful for a stable and resilient psyche.

COMMON cynicism is sobriety of mind and reasoning. Cynics are better than others at recognizing who really treats you well and who is just snotting under the sun.

How cynics behave - examples from life

Examples of value are quite varied. They can extend from family relationships to relationships with animals. Cynicism can be distinguished by its main characteristics: a person’s detachment, indifference, lack of empathy and compassion, as well as irritability towards people’s problems.

The following life situations can be cited as examples of cynicism:

  • A person knows how to resist manipulation. For example, there is a mother who is used to controlling her son’s life. Doesn't accept any girl, throws tantrums if her son doesn't listen to her. At one point, the guy’s healthy cynicism manifests itself - he brings his future wife to meet his mother, who, out of habit, starts a scandal, but the son simply offers to drink a sedative and does not fall for his mother’s manipulations.
  • Often cynics simply defend themselves with their behavior. This attitude often manifests itself in people who have been subjected to psychological violence in any of its forms for a long time. For example, a child has been subjected to humiliation and manipulation by relatives and immediate circle throughout his life. As a result, a person stops appreciating other people’s feelings and emotions and becomes a cynic, since his feelings and emotions during adolescence were not important to others.
  • Cynicism is a professional deformation. In many ways, the manifestation of cynicism is associated with a person’s professional activity. An example of such professions would be a surgeon or an investigator. Investigators and law enforcement officials often have distorted ideas about morality and emotional boundaries. This manifests itself in cynical jokes and attitudes towards issues of life and death.

Not all cynics are the same, so do not rush to label a person “bad, evil” if you notice such traits in him. Under the mask of cynicism, the traits of a good-natured and vulnerable person may be hidden. It’s just that, knowing his weaknesses and how people can ruthlessly attack them, he is forced to put on the armor of cynicism. In simple words - always give a person a chance to show their best qualities.

Types of cynicism - how it happens

Cynics are not perceived in a negative way by society; this character trait is now even becoming fashionable. Young people consider this position to be strong and smart. Cynicism comes in different forms; it can be divided into the following types:

  • Healthy cynicism. This is not a character flaw. Such a person does not play the lottery, does not follow the lead of boors and arrogant people, and does not allow himself to be deceived or insulted.
  • Hate romance. Offended and irritated by displays of love, kisses, flowers, love letters and various manifestations of romance. I am convinced that love is very rare in the world and does not tolerate deception.
  • A follower of black humor. He shocks the people around him with sarcastic remarks and rude jokes.
  • Pest . He cannot control his disdainful attitude towards people, is indifferent to other people's misfortunes, and often gloats over other people's problems. He likes to mock people and “troll” them.
  • Materialist . There are no feelings, there is only clear calculation and benefit. Easily breaks up with a person if he sees the futility of the relationship.

Cynicism in modern society is a way of resisting external stimuli. Based on the understanding of cynicism in modern psychology, it is used to abstract from constant external factors that cause neurosis, psychosis, and hysteria.

If you notice yourself being excessively cynical. You understand that cynicism has long outgrown healthy boundaries. You realize that cynicism has roots in your psychological traumas. If you see that it is difficult for your loved ones to maintain contact with you, contact a psychotherapist or psychologist.

Reasons for the development of cynicism


Unrequited love or betrayal can cause the development of cynicism

  1. When a child encounters some kind of injustice in childhood, he begins to hide his inner pain and hide under external indifference. If at the moment the parents do not help him cope with the sensations and do not explain how to survive it, then over time he will get used to such a reaction and turn into a cynic.
  2. Cynicism is characteristic of a teenager when puberty begins. Due to changes in hormonal levels, he tries to isolate himself from the world and protect himself.
  3. As we grow older, cynicism disappears, however, for some people it remains for life.
  4. When a boy or girl is faced with unrequited love, they will begin to convince others that real feelings do not exist. A woman who has experienced the betrayal of her beloved, his betrayal, will begin to assure others that men cannot remain faithful to their partner all their lives. And all because this individual cannot cope with his loss.
  5. Cynicism is present among people of certain professions. They need it for fruitful work. Cynicism helps in the careers of lawyers, doctors, and consultants. For example, consider doctors. If they had to feel all the suffering and pain of their patients, they would very quickly become emotionally exhausted and would not be able to work professionally.
  6. People use cynicism to hide from feelings of guilt and remorse, or from other negative experiences.

It turns out that the reasons for cynicism may be the following factors:

  • improper parenting, a personal example of cynicism that is adopted by a child in adulthood;
  • constant violation of individual rights, leading to the realization that laws are only of a legal nature;
  • an unfair attitude towards rights and personal freedom provokes the cynicism necessary for protection;

Individuals who were previously altruists, trusting of other people, and romantics can turn into true cynics under the influence of severe life blows, in particular, betrayal and deep disappointment.

Cynicism from a psychological point of view

In psychology, this character trait has a different meaning. Experts say that this is a type of neurotic behavior. The person is not interested in generally accepted norms of behavior and values. Such a neurotic is accustomed to destroying the usual foundations and rules, mocking standards and values.

Neurotics are a fairly collective category in psychology. The main sign of neurotic people is a constant feeling of anxiety about everything.

How do mentally healthy people differ from neurotics? The fact that they also experience nervousness, but based on real emotions that have real reasons. Neurotics, on the other hand, continuously generate the causes of their irritation within themselves.

We do not support the position of attributing cynicism to a neurotic state. On the contrary, cynicism is a way of avoiding irritants, unnecessary neurosis and worries. Since a person refuses to experience emotions in relation to many aspects of life.

What does the word "cynicism" mean?

Cynicism is a moral and behavioral nihilism, expressed in a disdainful attitude towards the moral foundations of society, established traditions and rules of behavior.

In this case, nihilism means the denial of moral norms as such, their complete non-acceptance, ridicule and belittlement of their significance. Cynicism by its nature is a phenomenon, human behavior.

The root word of the word cynicism is “cynicism”, its meaning is absolutely identical to the meaning of “cynicism”. Their main difference is their essence: as was said, cynicism is a phenomenon, human behavior, and cynicism is a character trait of an individual person, a feature of his behavior.

Of course, the meaning of the word “cynicism” has a negative emotional connotation, because cynicism is characterized by the following negative features:

  1. Disrespect for generally accepted moral standards;
  2. Failure to accept existing norms;
  3. Disregard for moral rules.

Pros and cons of cynicism.

Experts disagree on whether cynicism is good for us. Most likely, cynicism is neither good nor bad.

Minuses:

  • Medical experts say that cynics suffer from heart disease three to four times more often than non-cynics.
  • Cynics often find themselves lonely, hostile, anxious, and depressed. Constant resistance to the worldview deprives them of vitality and the will to live.
  • Cynicism can confuse its bearers in both social and professional life. After all, cynics are not “team players.”
  • Finally, a world full of cynics probably won't achieve much.

Pros:

  • A true cynic usually demands truth and justice from both acquaintances and public figures and organizations. In a notoriously corrupt world, this can only be a good thing.
  • Cynics help keep you honest. They see pretense and hypocrisy, condemn insincerity, hate bullies and mock fools. This often gives impetus to the most important investigative journalism.
  • A good cynic refuses to be a passive victim. He has a clear conscience, a reliable moral compass and an intact sense of self-worth.
  • As cynicism about many—perhaps even most—things and people increases, so does appreciation and affection for what is truly important and true. Cynicism leads to more tender feelings about what a person really needs.

Signs of cynicism in people

To know whether there are people with cynical reasoning in your environment, you need to not only know the meaning of this trait. It is recommended that you familiarize yourself with the main manifestations of this psychological trait and how to recognize a cynic:

  1. Specific behavior in society. He is distinguished by rude speech and categorical judgments. For him there is only black and white. Does not accept other people's points of view and opinions, treats everyone with disdain.
  2. Disregards moral values, ethics, and religious canons. He cannot enjoy contemplating masterpieces of art and culture, and does not want to follow generally accepted moral laws.
  3. Mental callousness. Anyone who is a cynic does not know how to sympathize, empathize, show compassion, regret, shows the height of cynicism. Not influenced by negative thoughts.
  4. People are treated with commercialism. In their environment there are only those with whom it is beneficial for them to contact; an ordinary person will not be in their social circle. An alliance with such a person is full of disappointments. He does not show tender feelings for his loved one, is not a romantic, and requires patience with himself. He can change with a calm soul and not suffer from remorse.
  5. He is a skeptic and shows sarcasm. A cynical person is disdainful of other people's values. Makes sarcastic comments about other people's experiences. He does not think that his words can hurt and cause suffering.
  6. For such a person there are no authorities. For him, modern cultural objects, historical figures, fame and recognition do not matter.
  7. Sympathy and compassion are manifested specifically. They are cold and emotionally distant, and most often sympathize only to assert themselves.

But do not forget that cynicism can only be a protective mask. That is, a person only externally creates the impression of such an insensitive and immoral type.

Cynicism is necessary in some professions. For example, cynicism protects a doctor from emotional burnout and nervous breakdowns, and allows him to do his job efficiently. Rescuers, firefighters, psychologists, sappers, police officers must work with cold calculation, controlling any feelings and emotions.

Why are doctors, judges, and police officers not allowed to handle the affairs of their loved ones? The risk is too high. Too many emotions and subjective attitude. We need someone else who can approach the issue rationally, cynically and objectively.

Degrees of cynicism

Let us consider from the perspective of psychology and psychiatry what cynical behavior is at different levels of its development and complexity.

Normal cynicism

It is based on distrust of the surrounding society. Therefore, it is very easy for such a person not to give money to a beggar, not to fall for the new “very favorable tariff” or discounts in his favorite store.

Egocentrism can often hide under this sauce. When a person thinks exclusively for his own benefit in any life situations.

Black humor

As you know, black humor is jokes for intelligent people. And among them there are a lot of cynics. Therefore, they love jokes on topics that are alien to the average member of society.

But it is worth remembering that just because someone jokes about death, this does not mean that he is a psychopath (sociopath) or a murderer. Often such people turn out to be very kind and sensitive individuals.

Cold and sanity

Representatives of this group have an analytical mind. If we talk about their emotional level, it is very meager. Such people are not capable of sympathy or pity.

This kind of people will not console a friend, will not wipe away his tears, but immediately begin to think about how to solve the problem. Cold emotionally and in relationships. This behavior makes it difficult for “cold cynics” to establish reliable social contacts. They are either official in nature or absent altogether.

Teenage maximalism

The definition of this type of cynicism is very similar to teenage maximalism. Such people deny absolutely everything: from politics in the country to bouquets for the Eighth of March.

The sooner they realize that wasting energy on negativity is pointless, the sooner they will see something beautiful around them.

Total evil

This is a level at which a person is consoled by the tears of others, rejoices in the grief of others (this is a manifestation of misanthropy). It can turn into a brutal act of vandalism against culture. As a rule, such people are shunned, so they do not become marginalized by choice.

Why a person becomes a cynic - reasons

As was already written above, cynics are made, not born. There are certain mechanisms for the development of cynicism in a person, the reasons for which may be:

  • previously experienced disappointment in life, betrayal of a loved one, pain, loss, other negative experience;
  • features of parental education - lack of tenderness and affection, excessive severity and rudeness;
  • the presence of a strong intrapersonal conflict, existential crisis, loss of faith in justice, destruction of ideals and illusions;
  • loss of support, lack of self-confidence, feeling threatened;
  • very high self-esteem, pride and manifestations of selfishness;
  • disregard for generally accepted values ​​in order to express one’s individuality;
  • signs of a more serious and deep psychological illness.

The main mechanism of development is strong long-term negative experience, excessive self-confidence, thanks to which a person considers himself superior to others. Before becoming a cynic, a person experiences a strong shock, after which his outlook on life changes.

With the help of healthy cynicism, people protect themselves from professional burnout and other negative consequences for the psyche. Moreover, they perform their tasks more professionally, since they turn off feelings and emotions. For example, a judge becomes dispassionate when making a decision; the defendant should not arouse pity or hatred in him.

Two types of cynicism

According to psychologists, there are two main types of cynicism:

  • Household . It manifests itself in everyday life through immoral actions, disregard for norms of behavior and other people's feelings, ridicule of people, ignoring other people's interests and desires.
  • Professional . It often occurs in those individuals whose psyche systematically suffers from serious challenges associated with the work sphere.

There is also another classification of cynicism:

  • legal - a person does not want to live in accordance with legal norms and laws;
  • social – disregard for moral standards;
  • social – present in a separate community;
  • economic – expresses dissatisfaction with the economic system.

General information and classification

The word cynic comes from “cynicus”, which means “cynic” in Latin. It is not surprising that the word cynic is considered as a synonym for cynic. This also includes a shameless person, a disgrace, an insolent person. There was a direction in philosophy that was represented by cynics - people who wanted to get rid of conventions and distance themselves from family, society, and the state. Illiteracy and bad behavior were seen as a good thing.

Cynicism is a deliberate disregard for ethics and moral values. It expresses inner rebellion. Cynicism can arise when a person feels impunity, he has nothing more to lose.

A cynic is a person who opposes the moral norms accepted in society. It is often associated with irony, tactlessness, a sense of permissiveness and rude behavior. Looking at a cynical person, one gets the impression that such concepts as kindness, sympathy, pity and modesty are unusual for him. But it is worth considering the fact that some individuals hide their hypersensitivity under cynicism, because they consider it their weak side.

A true cynic can only be an adult who has already formed principles, has life experience and the ability to make informed choices.

If cynicism is moderate, then it is considered as a manifestation of intelligence. One may get the impression that a cynic is confident in himself and will never allow himself to be deceived. Cynical men are of interest to girls because they know how to joke ironically, such individuals are interesting interlocutors. But with prolonged communication, it becomes clear that the young man devalues ​​those things that are significant to others, that he is not capable of deep feelings. Love and normal communication with a cynic is possible for a person who has a cynical character. But it’s better for vulnerable people not to start a relationship with a cynical person. Unless cynicism is a mask that allows you to hide your sensitivity.

Cynicism may manifest itself differently in different people. These types are distinguished.

  1. Healthy cynic. Such a person will not participate in the lottery and will be indifferent to letters of an obviously fraudulent nature. From one point of view, these are good traits, such a person is reasonable, but from the other, an indifferent attitude.
  2. A malicious pest. Any cynic who does not have the opportunity to stop in time will definitely fall into a similar state. He will be indifferent to the failure of others and will ignore losers. These cynics are absolutely miserable people.
  3. Anti lyricist. Such a person hates kisses when meeting, giving flowers, valentines. But this does not mean that he is completely devoid of feelings; in fact, this individual believes that such actions are not a manifestation of true romance. Such a person is a maximalist, he hates deception and often goes to extremes. The cynicism of a given person is a way of resisting obsessive opinions and banality. There is a risk that the anti-lyricist will begin to withdraw into himself or begin to commit evil towards other people. When you want a lot, but you get little, you become angry at people.
  4. Black comedian. Despite the fact that this type is the most harmless, it can greatly offend a sensitive person. Despite the “dark” jokes, such a cynic has a sense of compassion. They see black humor as just jokes. He can separate reality and the fantasy world. The negative aspects of this type is that people may perceive such a person as evil. An individual must feel the boundaries of what is permitted, and not be annoying, imposing his jokes on other people. If dark humor is not appreciated in a certain circle, there is no need to continue making such jokes or get upset that people do not understand such jokes.
  5. Materialist without imagination. Such a cynic has a strong mind that crowds out his feelings. At times this works to his advantage. This individual will not suffer from unrequited love. If he realizes that someone does not like him, he will simply switch his attention to other people. If any problem arises, he will not suffer, he will simply change the situation. In fact, such a person is deprived of many things in life. For example, while at a movie theater, a person will not evaluate the picture in general; he will observe how well the actors play. Such individuals do not believe in selflessness; they are incapable of empathy. There is a risk that life will remain exclusively business relationships.

There is also another type of classification.

  1. Legal. Cynicism is aimed at laws, legal norms, and the unwillingness to live in accordance with them.
  2. Public. This cynicism is observed among a group of people who want to have a happy society, from individuals who are comfortable coexisting. At the same time, the moral norms that are characteristic of a given society are not taken into account.
  3. Social cynicism. It appears in the middle of a single community of people.
  4. Economic. Characterized by dissatisfaction with the economic system existing in the country, the functioning of economic laws at the time of development of society.

Brief characteristics of a cynic in psychology

Cynical people oppose lofty ideals and feelings; they do not believe in love. They don’t think about shame, they are sure that everything in life can be bought, that there are no things or values ​​that need to be treasured. Such individuals communicate with other people only when it is beneficial for them. He will reject everything sublime and does not believe in true love and friendship.

Sympathy, pity and compassion are not inherent in such people. They can only sympathize if they are trying to be superior. They can laugh at the values ​​that are important to other people.

Can communicate rudely, point out mistakes, criticize, make sarcastic remarks. For him there are no authorities, he can aggressively perceive the opinions of others, his own opinion is considered the only correct one. Such a person sometimes suffers from anxious thoughts, inner emptiness, complete confusion, and awareness of injustice.

The modern concept of cynicism was preceded by the ideology of cynicism. What did this suggest? The Cynics opposed themselves to society, rejected social norms and generally accepted values.

They emphasized that any human needs, including biological (animal) ones, are natural, correct and allowed. Of course, complete freedom often looked asocial and more like arbitrariness.

Cynicism was a counterculture; its representatives called themselves marginal. Modern cynicism is not so active and pronounced.

It is more often limited to thinking, the mental opposition of the individual to society, and not to active actions.

Who is this cynic?

A cynic is a person who demonstratively disregards social, cultural or religious values, as well as moral norms and rules of behavior. There is no consensus in society regarding this type of people. Some see in the cynic a strong personality, witty and decisive, who sees human shortcomings and boldly condemns them. Others believe that a cynical person is an immoral type who is not capable of feeling, but only mocks everything that is dear to normal people. Let's try to figure out which of them is closer to the truth.

Describing the cynic personality type, the authors place the main emphasis on the destructiveness of this concept. So, most readers who want to understand this topic, without extensive searching on the Internet, will read a couple of articles and decide that cynics are bad. But, if you analyze your own life experience , it becomes clear that a cynical person is not such a bad person at all. First, let's look at the concept itself and the history of its origin.

Rebellion against social norms and routines has probably occurred since the beginning of humanity. This was not yet cynicism, in its modern sense. It’s just that some people, due to the characteristics of their temperament or character, find it more difficult to get along with others. For the first time, cynicism as a mass phenomenon appeared in Ancient Greece, around the 4th-5th centuries BC. It was then that the thinker Antisthenes founded the philosophical school of the Cynics, who began to fight against conventions. They welcomed maximum simplification and naturalness in all areas of life. The Romans apparently did not pronounce the letter “k” well, so they later renamed them Cynics.

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One of the brightest followers of Cynicism was Diogenes of Sinope, who was remembered by his contemporaries and descendants for his unique way of life. The idea of ​​him as a philosopher who lived in a barrel has firmly entered into popular culture. Even as a philosophy, cynicism was closely related to marginality, that is, the loss of a person from social relationships. Even in the 21st century, this type of thinking pushes its owner towards an asocial lifestyle. But this happens only in the case of pronounced cynicism.

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Centuries passed, and gradually philosophical cynicism retreated, leaving only a word that began to be used to call those who do not accept social norms. It is unlikely that modern homeless people or spiteful critics who denigrate any aspects of human relations feel involved in philosophy. But are people who show cynicism so wrong? To answer this question, it is necessary to understand the reasons that give rise to this type of worldview.

As a rule, people become cynics in response to impunity or disappointment. These are different options, and therefore their “fruits” cannot be assessed in the same way. In the first case, we are talking about a feeling of permissiveness and self-confidence, when egocentrism dominates. Representatives of the “golden youth” are considered a striking example of such cynics. They do not believe in the sincerity of those around them, they revel in the power of their parents’ money, they do not care about laws and orders, realizing that they will be able to pay themselves off in any situation. Sometimes their behavior poses a threat to others.

The second option includes cynics who are simply disillusioned with the justice of the world. This worldview becomes a defensive reaction for them. Unlike majors, such people are characterized by a certain mental disorder, which can progress, turning them into criminals or misanthropes (they hate others). Depending on the degree of severity of cynicism, it is customary to talk about its various types, which we will consider in detail.

How to quickly recognize a cynic in life

Recognizing a cynic in life can be quite a difficult task. Most people simply have a wayward character and rudeness, which can be confused with a cynic. By what factors can you recognize such a person:

  • Lack of empathy. In standard human relationships, each person tries to understand the other, to put himself in his place. A cynic will not try to feel compassion for your problems, your feelings and emotions. Moreover, he will not even be able to feign empathy to alleviate your emotional state;
  • Lack of a system of moral principles and values . In most cases, those general norms of behavior that are inherent to everyone are empty words for a cynic. In conversations on most topics, the lack of moral values ​​will stand out;
  • Deviant behavior. If, when communicating with a person, you see deviations from the person’s model of healthy behavior, perhaps you are a cynic.
  • Black humor. If a person is not involved in difficult professions, but you see his unhealthy attitude towards issues of life, death, love, etc., then this may be one of the manifestations of cynicism.

Types of Cynics

The classification is conditional and based on observations. However, it makes it clear what kind of cynic is in front of you and how to interact with him.

Master of black humor

A typical example is the main character of the TV series “House”. Only the devil himself or his only bosom friend can appreciate his dark witticisms. He is a supporter of radical solutions and seriously believes that in order to get rid of the hungry and homeless, the former must be fed to the latter.

This type of cynicism is relatively innocent, since, despite such specific beliefs, such a person is likely to take pity on a stray kitten and give up his seat in transport to a pregnant woman.

Black humorists evoke sympathy only if they have mastered his difficult art to perfection, and their good deeds speak more eloquently than any words.

Antiromantic

A typical example is Ostap Bender. To achieve his goals, he will not disdain to deceive both the poor widow Gritsatsueva and the extravagant Ellochka the cannibal. The anti-romantic, be it a man or a woman, treats most representatives of society very superficially and only as a tool for the game he is playing.

His life is a complicated thing, but it opens as simply as a box. You just need to be able to open it. If you do this, you are likely to find many pleasant surprises. He is capable of strong and deep feeling, devotion in friendship and love.

Materialist

A typical example is Sherlock from the series of the same name. His actions are coordinated only by a calculating and cold mind. Feelings and emotions, in his opinion, are just ballast that can ruin a perfectly developed plan of action. Therefore, he dumps the ballast. A materialist does not suffer from unrequited love because it is not rational. He sees people through and through and chooses his surroundings very scrupulously.

However, excessive prudence and inability to empathize often deprive him of the simple joys of life. Therefore, the lot of a materialist often becomes proud loneliness.

the villain

A typical example is the Joker from the movie Batman. If a villain crosses your path, quickly run in the opposite direction. Here is the most intolerable type of cynic. He is merciless towards others. He is malicious towards those who are weaker than him. He is indifferent to the achievements of others. All attempts to get close to such a person end in a broken heart, self-esteem collapsing under the plinth, and sometimes even a broken destiny. He will not change under any circumstances, since he feels great in this role.

But, despite their apparent invincibility, deep down, villains are very unhappy people who tolerate themselves only with the help of cynicism.

Healthy cynic

A typical example is Monica from the series Friends. Healthy cynicism allows these people to pass by a beggar or an advertisement about collecting money for an operation. They know very well that there are a lot of unfortunate and disadvantaged people around, but they don’t think that lamenting about this will help them. Therefore, they concentrate all internal resources on arranging their own lives. Yes, it is selfish, but it is quite reasonable and justified.

As a rule, healthy cynics have very kind hearts. For those whom they let into a narrow circle of loved ones, such people will give everything they have, plus their boundless love.

What to do if you discover a cynic in yourself

You can live with cynicism. There is no need to try to suppress it in yourself if it helps you. If this character trait does not have a negative impact on your psyche, you just need to accept it, do not deny it in yourself and do not reproach yourself for it.

If possible, try to restrain yourself from sarcasm and dark humor, since people really don’t like it.

You need to learn to trust people, understand that not everyone is a hypocrite, not everyone is looking for profit. It is important to adhere to healthy cynicism, it helps in life. If possible, restrain yourself from various discussions and disputes.

Your arguments are too painful for people. Psychologists recommend learning to enjoy life. Turn off your mind more often, feel your heart, obey its will.

If you feel that this trait is causing you more inconvenience than benefit, consult a psychologist. He will help you work through the problem and find its causes. Afterwards, it will be easier for you to control cynicism and get along with it.

Famous people are cynics

Dr. House

Dr. House is a very famous cynic these days. Doctors are becoming cynical. If they grieved for every person they failed to help and died, they would very soon go crazy. House is a cynic not because he is lame, but because he first of all sees the disease, but he tries not to notice the person. The disease is an interesting problem for him, but he doesn’t like people.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Nietzsche may seem like a cynic if you do not study in detail the subtleties of his worldview. However, Nietzsche is more of a romantic. What is the difference? A romantic, unlike a cynic, suffers because he sees a huge difference between the real world and his ideals. Nietzsche did not rejoice in telling people that God was dead, it was voicing the sad truth, the understanding that pure ideals had also disappeared.

Sigmud Freud

Freud is the first one to come to mind when it comes to cynicism. He explained his sublime impulses by elementary instincts. However, Freud was not the first to discover this. He considered his teacher A. Schopenhauer, who said that a cruel, irrational World Will rules over man and the world. The human ego is a plaything for the unconscious force. And Freud was not the first to equate love and sexual desire; surprisingly, A. Schopenhauer was the first to do this.

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How to communicate with a cynic without harming yourself

It is difficult to communicate with such a person, especially for emotional people. If it is not possible to exclude him from your social circle, it is recommended to follow these tips:

  • Don't try to convince. A cynic has excessively high self-esteem, he considers himself the smartest and is confident that he is right.
  • Do not engage in polemics or disputes. Such a person will always find a lot of arguments to prove that he is right.
  • Do not allow yourself to be drawn into conflict. Even if you see that a person is behaving inappropriately, do not try to quarrel with him or be rude.
  • Gain trust. This must be done if you value your relationship with him. A cynic can turn out to be a good and loyal friend if he begins to trust you.
  • Don't try to change it.
  • Understand that a cynic often does not intend to hurt you with words, it’s just his way of communicating.

When a cynic devalues ​​the successes of others, this translates to “I really wanted to be someone, but I didn’t succeed. It hurts and envys me to look at others’ achievements because it reminds me of my failure.”

There is no need to despise and fear cynical people, every cynic simply says what people around them think, this is good from any point of view, it is not always appropriate, but when the word hits the mark and a person agrees with the cynic, it almost always has favorable consequences, i.e. .To. he tries to correct the shortcomings.

How to raise a child so that he does not grow up to be a cynic

Typically, the traits of cynicism begin to develop in a person in childhood. There are simple rules for raising a child so that he does not grow up to be a cynic:

  • do not ridicule his behavior and emotions;
  • do not give in to the desire to conflict;
  • praise and encourage good actions and behavior;
  • be emotionally attached, show your love;
  • Be responsible;
  • show that your child comes first;
  • help express your emotions;
  • provide him with unconditional support.

It is important to understand that children's cynicism is easier to correct than an adult's. When communicating with your child, think about whether your behavior is the cause of this character trait in your child.

Cynics are people who have their feet on the ground, and do not have their head in the clouds, having read fairy tales and watched enough slobbering films. Cynics are simply realists. They look at the world with their own eyes, perceive it as it is, and not through rose-colored glasses. The healthiest people in the world.

Cynics from childhood

What could be cuter than a young child? But it was not there. When the whole family celebrated their third anniversary, dramatic changes in the personality of their child begin.

The child falls into negativism: he doesn’t like everything, throws tantrums, and begins to make trouble for any reason. Also tries to boss his mom and dad around. For example, when a girl gets her pigtails tied, she rips the rubber bands onto the floor and stomps on them, showing her “fi.”

Thus, he asserts himself in this new and incomprehensible world. Contrastes himself with relatives and everything that happens around him. This is how the child studies himself, realizes his separate “I”, which used to be one with the person who raised and nursed him. As a rule, this is the mother.

Therefore, if in the future such a son or daughter grows into a cynic, this does not mean that the individual has a desire to not give a damn about everything around him. This is how she asserts and expresses herself. In this way, people build their own personality, and do not encroach on other people's values.

Cynicism on the part of men towards women

A cynical man inspires confidence, alluring harshness, masculinity and sexuality. But this is only until he starts a relationship with a woman. She will either have to endure it or leave.

There is a common feature for all cynic men - they prefer to be in open relationships. They don't believe in love and deny romance. They are unapproachable, vulnerable, hiding their true feelings under the guise of coldness and sarcasm. They are afraid to trust and open their hearts.

If you, as a woman, are not satisfied with this attitude from a man. Don't try to re-educate the person. Accept that this is not your person.

How to deal with cynicism

In order to cope with cynicism, you need to focus on developing empathy, compassion, learning to set priorities correctly and accept spiritual values. Cynicism is an acute manifestation of realism and egoism.

The idea of ​​cynics is based on satisfying their needs and interests, material and personal desires.

To get rid of cynicism, you need to develop romanticism in yourself and gradually get rid of selfishness. Start doing something selflessly for other people, develop empathy, learn empathy. Remember when you enjoyed life and contemplated something beautiful. Return to this moment and remember your feelings.

How to become a cynic

It sounds strange, but for some people it is useful to gain a dose of cynicism in order to get out of the role of the eternal victim and throw off everyone who has climbed up and dangled their legs from their shoulders. Usually these are very soft, sensitive, weak-willed people who are easily manipulated by others, naive and too trusting.

To become a cynic you need:

  • focus on your disappointments;
  • expect a repetition of negative experiences;
  • question the motives of all people;
  • openly express your opinions and thoughts;
  • use black humor;
  • constantly making cutting remarks to others;
  • openly ridicule all the vices of society;
  • Don't be afraid to voice your disapproval.

Remember that being a complete cynic will never bring about positive changes in your life. Moreover, it will deprive you of a certain range of emotions, experiences and life experiences. But “healthy,” controlled cynicism can be useful.

The most famous cynics in history

There are quite a few famous people in history who were notorious cynics, but let’s focus on the brightest and most talented personalities.

Sigmud Freud

The father of psychoanalysis reduced all high feelings to simple instincts. He believed that people are not the crown of creation. This misanthrope believed that man is only a puppet in the hands of an evil, irrational world will.

He considered the essence of man to be only procreation, without any bright feelings. I didn’t want to be deceived by other ideas.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Nietzsche was an atheist who believed that all human ideals are buried with God. At heart, he was a romantic who lacked bright ideals and expectations. They died after disappointments in life.

Examples

  1. Ostap Bender is a character who wants to get the maximum benefit in everything. He believed that people liked a lot of cynicism.
  2. Evgeny Bazarov is a character in Turgenev’s work. It was dominated by pride, skepticism and nihilism. Behind the cynicism of this hero was hidden the fear of loneliness.
  3. Carlson is a cartoon character who was a true representative of selfishness.
  4. Dr. House is the main character from the series of the same name. He practically did not notice people, saw only their illnesses in his patients, and happily solved riddles in order to determine the correct diagnosis.

Now you know what the word cynic means. Today cynicism is becoming fashionable. An individual may not be able to achieve the image that he has imagined for himself or, for example, having received a specialty that he does not like, he will encounter an intrapersonal conflict. In the eyes of some people, a cynic looks like an unusual and intelligent person.

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