Temporary difficulties (fear of being left without money). Article. Money trainings. Self-knowledge.ru

In this article we will tell you:

13 reasons for female loneliness
Fighting the fear of loneliness
12 tips on how to avoid being alone for life

After parting with her loved one, a woman is often tormented by the thought of how not to be left alone. Indeed, in most cases, each of us perceives a new serious relationship as a step towards a marriage that will last happily ever after, and the husband will be a reliable protection against loneliness.

But the relationship is over, the pain is cried out, the comforting portion of ice cream is eaten... And the fear of being alone forever begins to sharpen the heart. If all of a woman’s relationships end in separation over and over again, she inevitably thinks that she bears the “stamp” of loneliness. How to overcome this fear and not be left alone even after many failures?

Fear and love are two components,

two sides of the same coin that are constantly present side by side. So the question is, who are you friends with more often?

We humans have a working tool, which we call consciousness. Its important feature is to evolve and increase its dimension in space. We call this process the growth and expansion of consciousness.

So, measuring the level of your consciousness, the presence of the process itself, is only possible through understanding with whom you are more often friends, what you more often choose: love or fear.

In friendship with fear, a person is afraid of everything: of being misunderstood; look wrong; suddenly they won’t support him; his point of view will be wrong; suddenly the decision made turns out to be wrong.

Fortune tellers are held in high esteem here: will I be happy with this person or not; I will make money from this job; the boss will be good or unlucky again; what kind of job to look for; where is my money; suddenly this job doesn’t pay; suddenly the husband will kick you out or leave for someone else.

A person in friendship with fear is afraid of everything, he always thinks that he is taking risks. In all areas: relationships, career, money. A person lives from states of low vibrations: fear, guilt, resentment, claims to life and fate.

Fears keep a person within limits and conditions. There are many situations in life that you don’t like and don’t suit. But for change to come, it is important to change something. But fear holds on and everything remains the same.

How to react to the appearance of peniaphobia?

The most susceptible to this phobia are pensioners who are afraid of losing income and being left without a livelihood due to age and lack of strength, housewives, companions of wealthy men and their children, businessmen who are afraid of losing their reputation and finances as a result of an unsuccessful deal, husbands and fathers, who are afraid of losing everything they have acquired, of no longer being able to provide for their family. Peniaphobes need to remember that without awareness of the problem it is impossible to find ways to solve it, so you should not be shy and tell a psychologist about it. A competent specialist will set you up for treatment of your phobia, will be able to identify the causes of fear, and prescribe the necessary courses/therapy. Do not hide the presence of a phobia from relatives or friends, because more than ever you will need support from loved ones, their understanding and non-professional (everyday) psychological help.

Fear breeds uncertainty.

You are not sure, you have no guarantee, although you go like everyone else.

What if you try and take a step towards your dream? Small? Scary.

A person relies on thoughts—horror stories—and begins to live from them. Where do these horror stories come from? This is a previous negative experience, as well as the unsuccessful experience of other people, and maybe fictional movie characters.

The universe works differently. Take a step, then another opens. Yes. Choice and step are work. You just need to face fear.

I myself went nowhere during one of the periods of my life, which led me along the path of change.

The inspiration to write this article was a letter from my student, she is a psychologist.

“It turns out that my clients show me my insecurities, my attitude towards myself and my knowledge? My swing. My wish is for everyone to be a good psychologist.
And do you know what I allowed myself? I gave myself permission to not like other people. I agree that my point of view may not be accepted and that is normal.
But that doesn't mean I have to go out of my way.
Thank you, Marina, for teaching me to believe in myself!”

Take care of your finances

In this case, the general principle also applies: understand what exactly is bothering you, assess the situation, make a decision, write down specific actions to eliminate this problem and act.

If you are afraid that you will be laid off, you can already conduct an audit of your skills in this case and start completing your studies in order to increase your value in the labor market. In your current job, you can take on new responsibilities in key business areas to become indispensable. Being active like this can also help reduce anxiety.

If you are afraid of losing your regular income, increase your financial cushion. Think and write down what will help you do this.

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If you are afraid of the ruble exchange rate falling, consider purchasing investment instruments and find out everything about it.

But do not take rash, hasty actions. The human psyche is designed in such a way that in moments of emotional stress, his cognitive abilities deteriorate. For example, it is known that inexperienced investors often sell assets at low prices in moments of panic, and buy, on the contrary, at high prices, overwhelmed by greed and frustration about missed opportunities.

Read on topic: 10 free online courses on financial literacy and investing

The effect of mass contagion, known in psychology, also applies here: people unconsciously “infect” each other’s emotions and, in a situation of uncertainty, begin to act as the majority does, even if it is irrational. It is important to remember this and try not to give in to the general mood.

During a crisis, the risk of dismissal increases, asset prices change, fall - all this is true, but a correct sober assessment of reality in itself can save us money.

On the other hand, almost everyone knows the banal truth: a crisis is not only a time of decline, but also a time of renewal and a time of opportunity. You can just buy cheaper assets. Work in the field of crisis management is becoming especially in demand. Remember that there is no absolutely “dark” time, you can always find positive moments and concentrate on them.

Read on topic: 6 ways to maintain your income during a crisis

If you don't like it, it's a signal for action.

A man travels in a reserved seat carriage. Suddenly he realizes that it would be more comfortable to extend the journey in the SV carriage.

For this to happen, you need to get out of one carriage and go to another. If such a transition does not occur, then the journey will continue in a reserved seat carriage.

So, creating yourself, your life, is a choice: to remain in fear or to get out of it and live out of a feeling of love.

Public speaking occurs in everyone's life; important dialogue, and it doesn’t matter with a partner, with a child, with a mother. I often worry that I might make a mistake, but suddenly it won’t work out.

Who is susceptible to nomophobia?

No one is immune from it, but research suggests that some people are at greater risk than others. Meaning:

Age . Youth are more susceptible to addiction Cell-Phone Addiction: A Review than adults. This is especially true for teenagers from 14 to 20 years old.

Floor . According to early research, men are more prone to nomophobia. According to the latest data, the risk is still higher in women. On average, they spend more time on their phone. Although both sexes use gadgets for the same purposes - mainly for messaging, and then for everything else.

Phone model . Owners of sophisticated smartphones are more prone to nomophobia than owners of simple push-button phones. Because the development of addiction is not related to the device itself, but to the opportunities it provides.

Presence of other disorders . If a person already has, say, an anxiety or panic disorder, they are at greater risk of becoming dependent on their phone.

Let's look at what fear is.

We begin to be afraid, it would seem, well, okay. And at this time a person does not belong to himself, he is completely overcome by fear.

Increased heart rate, headaches, trembling of limbs, nausea, and anxiety. These symptoms cause a surge of adrenaline, changes in blood composition and pressure.

This is the state when we find ourselves in a fight or flight situation. This is the state before an attack on an enemy, a hunter of prey. This is how the reptilian brain works. We feel a change in our physiology and we begin to slow down. This is exactly the anxiety that we need and it is important to turn into useful energy.

As soon as you feel the presence of adrenaline in the blood (fear), this is a powerful signal from the subconscious that says: WE ARE READY TO ACT.

Further, due to the fact that we do not translate this readiness into action, a condition begins to accumulate, like an unpleasant feeling of fear. Anticipation of something terrible.

And if we translate this state into action, then delight comes. For example, when I was young, it was scary to go to a disco for the first time. We came, we don’t show that it’s scary. If you stand on the sidelines, fear accumulates. And if you follow the impulse of action, then delight.

Causes of peniaphobia

The main reason for peniaphobia is the false belief that lack of finances is associated with suffering and humiliation. Modern society often equates the poor with miserable slaves. A strong impetus for the emergence of peniaphobia can be the fear of contracting a difficult-to-treat disease. A template is strengthened in a person’s subconscious: money is a means of salvation from incurable diseases, providing the only chance to prolong life. Another reason for the fear of poverty is the panicky fear of loneliness, which most often develops in immature individuals. And finally, the last reason for peniaphobia is an excessive thirst for consumption. This applies to people drowning in luxury, and at the same time thinking that they will lose the meaning of life if they are deprived of all wealth.

Negotiation practice

We take a breath, one deep exhale. Reconnecting with our unconscious. It is important not just to react to fear, but to restore connection with the signal that came from the unconscious. Place your hand calmly on the place where this feeling of fear arises. If you train, you can remember this state of fear and discomfort. Usually this is the chest area, solar plexus.
Close your eyes, turn inward, direct your attention deep into yourself. It’s as if you can mentally reach out and touch this place. Turning to your Divine, to your Higher Self, ask to guide you through this dialogue: “Dear unconscious, thank you for this signal. And now I ask you, turn this feeling, which is not very suitable for me at this moment, for me it is uncomfortable, into a feeling of warmth and inner readiness to act.
Observe how heat and internal energy accumulate in this place. This is how I feel about it. It's all about the sensations, the feeling. If something is not pleasant, then we can ask our subconscious to transfer this state to another one that is pleasant to us. This signal, into some other form of signal.

Pathology treatment methods

Many patients suffering from peniaphobia are forced to deal with their illness on their own. The peculiarities of behavior change make them unpleasant interlocutors and friends, and therefore loved ones often turn away from them, attributing everything to the disgusting character of the peniaphobe.

Meanwhile, it is almost impossible to cope with the irrational fear of poverty on your own. It is important to consult a psychotherapist in time to help find the causes of peniaphobia.

Psychological disorders need to be treated comprehensively. Therapy includes:

taking medications to alleviate the course of the disease and relieve some of the symptoms;
mental correction aimed at determining the cause of the pathology and developing an adequate response to stressful situations.

Basic drugs against phobias

To achieve maximum effect, doctors prescribe several drugs for simultaneous use, which can be divided into the following groups:

neuroleptics relieve increased anxiety, often have sedative properties, and are effective in combating various manifestations of phobias, including delusions and hallucinations;
tranquilizers relieve emotional stress, have an anticonvulsant effect, normalize sleep, and are effective against panic attacks and obsessive rituals;
antidepressants are drugs for the treatment of various types of depression; they are effective in depressive states accompanied by thoughts of suicide;
beta blockers limit the production of the fear hormone - adrenaline - and alleviate the physical symptoms of phobia (tremor, stupor, partial muscle paralysis, difficulty breathing, and similar signs).

Non-drug methods of influence

Psychotherapeutic techniques for overcoming the irrational fear of poverty are also used in a comprehensive manner. The psychotherapist begins working with the patient using soft methods of influence, and as the mental state stabilizes, he moves on to methods that include immersing the patient in stressful situations.

Psychotherapy for phobias includes the following techniques:

Psychological consultations. This stage of treatment involves an active dialogue between the doctor and the patient, during which the causes of fear and the characteristics of its manifestation, the main situations that cause anxiety in the patient, are determined. The result of the consultations is a list of medications that relieve acute forms of the disease and recommendations for behavior under stress.
Rational psychotherapy is a series of exercises that train a peniaphobe’s ability to remain calm and think sensibly in critical situations. The result of the work of the psychotherapist and the patient using this technique is the patient’s ability to accurately identify manifestations of anxiety associated specifically with a phobia, and not confuse them with manifestations of other diseases. This helps prevent the development of hypochondria and other phobias.
Cognitive behavioral therapy is the process of analyzing a patient's actions in order to identify behavioral habits and thoughts (associations) that cause acute attacks of phobia. During therapy, recommendations are also developed for how to respond to such parasitic thoughts. As part of cognitive behavioral therapy, the patient, under the supervision and accompaniment of a doctor, can be immersed in stressful situations - both imaginary and real. A good result is considered to be the patient's ability to adjust thinking and behavior that previously caused anxiety in a direction that does not lead to an exacerbation of peniaphobia or the appearance of attacks. Models of behavior in a state of anxiety are also developed, as well as skills of self-control and independent suppression (confrontation) of fear.
The confrontation method is a way of suppressing the influence of a phobia on a person’s behavior by contrasting or desensitizing the fear of poverty. The peniaphobe is asked to imagine a stressful situation and “experience” it in order to develop a habit of fear. The technique is aimed at reducing the level of fear in the patient. The ability to act while ignoring anxiety is also developed. For example, consciously spend a certain amount or refuse to purchase cheap food in favor of more expensive ones.
Paradoxical intention is a method of treating phobias “by contradiction” - an exercise during which the main symptom and problem of the patient becomes his responsibility. The patient is asked to provoke the appearance of fear on purpose, to demonstrate it as strongly as possible and exaggerate it, leading to the grotesque. Wealthy peniaphobes are advised to give up any expenses, that is, to artificially place themselves in poverty, first for a day, then for a longer period. Their children and wives should refuse support and live on their own for a few days. The experience helps, if not completely get rid of fear, then reduces the level of susceptibility to anxiety.

This is not a complete list of methods used. Specialists in overcoming phobias can alternate and change the set of methods, taking into account the individual characteristics of the patient. Only one thing remains unchanged: for successful treatment, the patient must believe in himself and be patient, since getting rid of fears is a long process of self-knowledge and work on oneself.