Generational conflict or reasons why different generations do not understand each other. Types of generations and ways to prevent generation gaps

Scientific and technological progress, technological development and social changes greatly influence our lives. Therefore, what was correct and natural for the older generation is outdated and awkward for the younger generation. In this regard, a generational conflict arises. Constant quarrels, misunderstandings, criticism and moralizing lead to the destruction of relationships between family members.

What is meant by the words generation gap, generational conflict and why does it arise?

The words “conflict of generations” are usually understood as a cultural and social phenomenon when the values of the younger generation differ significantly from the values of the older generation.
Young people stop identifying themselves with their fathers and grandfathers, completely rejecting their authority and experience. Children and parents in such a situation perceive each other as representatives of a completely different culture and worldview.

Misunderstanding between children and parents

In the past, the problem of generational conflict was not so noticeable. For many centuries, two or three generations lived a similar lifestyle as society developed slowly. Children, as a rule, learned their father's trade and in the process of such learning adopted his worldview. The words of the older generation were true and were not questioned.
Elder man always meant “wise man,” since the source of knowledge was only life experience. Therefore, children never competed with their parents in knowledge and wisdom. And young people did not have the opportunity to express their individuality.
The development of society has given children the opportunity to learn. And if earlier there was only one way to find out something - it was to ask the older generation, then later the youth had other sources of acquiring knowledge. Gradually, the attitude of the younger generation towards older people transformed into less respectful.

Researchers have identified the main factors that cause generational conflict and the emergence of sociocultural distance between elders and younger ones:

Changing social conditions.
Mismatch of life priorities.
Decline in the social status of an elderly person in society .
Changes in working conditions as a result of scientific and technological progress.
Psychological characteristics of people of different ages.
Reducing the significance of the experience of previous generations due to new opportunities for obtaining information.

The conflict between generations makes it difficult to understand each other

These days, the generation gap seems more acute. This problem is the result of the rapid development of society. The world is improving every day, and the immediate past seems too outdated.

Modern society is characterized by the continuous introduction of innovations, which periodically restructure established traditions and norms. And many things that were previously prohibited are now the social and cultural norm.
Psychologists are confident that the problem of mutual understanding between the older and younger generations will always exist. After all, the culture on which one generation was raised will not be fully understandable to another. Each new generation lives based on the results and experience of all previous ones. At the same time, people use and develop only that without which their existence is not possible, and categorically reject that which, in their opinion, is outdated.

What it is?

Openly declaring the conflict between generations and actively using this term began in America in the 1960s.

During this period, a protest arose among young people regarding the war with Vietnam. She was also not satisfied with the racial discrimination that existed in the country and social injustice.

The teenagers quarreled with their parents and engaged in hand-to-hand combat with the police. And it was so large-scale that sociologists started talking about the open, acute problem of fathers and children.

Although it has existed at all times, and will always exist as long as humanity lives.

This topic has been studied most deeply by such specialists as Carl Whitaker, Murray Bowen, Virginia Satir and Salvador Minuchin.

Generational conflict is the emergence of contradictions between representatives of both one and different generations.

It allows you to either strengthen relationships and social ties between the participants, or, on the contrary, destroy them if they were unable to find a way out of the current situation that would suit both parties.

Types of generations and factors leading to generational conflict

Why do different generations so often fail to find a common language? According to William Strauss and Neil Howe's generational theory, people's interests and values are largely determined by the period in which they were born. The worldview of people born in the same time period will be similar in many respects, since in childhood and adolescence they experienced the same social experiences, while changes in worldview occur, on average, every 20 years.

There are five types of generations, each of which has certain fundamental qualities:

“The Silent Ones” (birth period 1923 – 1942). Most of their lives occurred at a time when science and technology were rapidly developing. Such people are distinguished by modesty, as well as strict adherence to ethical standards, rules and traditions. They prefer to save money and tend to “stock up for future use”; they value morality and respect. “Silent people” do not like to experiment.
“Baby Boomers” (birth period 1942 – 1962). Born during the difficult war and post-war years, many of them lost their parents early and therefore did not receive the required amount of affection and love. This circumstance caused them to be somewhat aggressive. In general, these are optimistic, active and creative people. They were the ones who built the new world. Baby Boomers are team-oriented. Their main quality is rationalism . They do not like to leave their comfort zone, and they also prefer to work at one enterprise all their lives. They value material wealth and financial stability, considering these factors to be an indicator of success.
“Generation X” (birth period 1963 – 1982). These are people whose early childhood was spent in kindergartens, which caused many of them to have childhood psychological trauma. Therefore, Xs, as a rule, do not talk about their problems and what causes them inconvenience. They are ready for experiments and everything new. One of the main priorities for these people is higher education, which, in their opinion, is the key to a successful and wealthy life. “Xers” are not prone to spending and prefer to save money for significant, large purchases. They love to compete, but at the same time they are often not confident in themselves. They tend to control everything, so they rarely delegate tasks.
“Generation Y” (birth period 1983 – 2000). Optimistic, open and ready for any changes, people. Education is not something important for them. good work more Moreover, they are confident that a profession should not only bring money, but also bring joy. These are active users and consumers. This type of people only does what they like. “Greeks” will not tolerate any pressure or rude attitude towards themselves. They make purchases mainly via the Internet. They love independent travel without travel agencies and expensive hotels. Freedom of movement and vivid impressions are what they need. For “gamers,” the main thing is personal sensations and feelings. They live the way they want, do not depend on the opinions of others and do not recognize authorities.
“Generation Z” (birth period since 2000). Freedom-loving, dreamy, but somewhat infantile people. They are used to being loved unconditionally. Therefore, they do not need to prove anything to anyone or earn anyone's favor. As a rule, representatives of this type do not really like to communicate in person, preferring correspondence on social networks. Because of this, they have a poor understanding of people. But the Zetas master any modern gadgets extremely easily and quickly.

Separation of Generations
In addition to the differences described, there are a number of factors that cause generational conflict:

Unequal life values. What seemed important in previous years may not be of any interest to modern people. In addition, the older generation is accustomed to postponing life “for later.” And modern people are sure that they need to live today, now.
Different upbringing. Modern methods of education are absolutely not similar to those that were used before. Nowadays children receive much more care and attention from their parents. Therefore, they are happier, kinder and more open.
Rapid development of technology and science. Every day new things appear that make life or production processes easier. Progress is accelerating, and the older generation simply does not have time to learn new technologies.

You need to understand that each generation performs its own tasks. If we ignore the differences between the worldviews of different age groups, we can become a society where people do not understand each other. Therefore, we must value and respect people of all ages and views.

Baby Boomers

People who were born after the Great Patriotic War / depositphotos.com

Researchers include in this category those who were born during the “era of recovery” - from 1944 to 1964. The USSR won the Great Patriotic War, it was necessary to carry out the plan for the development of the state, including improving the demographic situation. This circumstance provoked a sharp jump in the birth rate in the Soviet Union.

Distinctive features of the Baby Boomer generation:

predisposition to collective activities;
trusting relationship with peers;
faith in the bright future of the state;
willingness to work “for the idea”;
conservative view of the world.

Unfortunately, everything that these people believed in collapsed in the 80s, when perestroika began in the country. At that time, representatives of the baby boomer generation were from 18 to 40 years old, respectively, few of them were able to accept the new reforms and social system of the state.

How to Work and Communicate with Baby Boomers

First, take into account the fact that people of the older generation are formed individuals and it is unlikely that you will be able to change them. You will get nothing but conflict. Secondly, the “carrot and stick” method works well for such people. It is important for them to feel needed in the eyes of society - the trail of Soviet upbringing cannot be easily dispelled. Make them feel like they are irreplaceable.

Third, Baby Boomers are the only generation that loves to teach. They most often utter the phrases: “I know what’s best” and “In my times...”, so be prepared for periodic instructions and perceive this as a characteristic of a particular individual.

How to understand the expression lost generation?

The lost generation refers to people who have broken away from religious or cultural traditions and have lost their ideals. This expression came into use after the First World War. This formulation is attributed to Gertrude Stein, a representative of American modernism. And her close friend Ernest Hemingway used her expression in the epigraph of his work “Fiesta.”

The lost generation began to be called young people who were drafted to war when they were very young. These guys did not have time to receive a proper education, but early learned the art of killing. Returning home after the end of the war, many of them were unable to adapt to peaceful life, as they were accustomed to different conditions and orders; young men returned morally crippled, and they were unable to live a new, peaceful life.

And after all the horror that they experienced, the things around them seemed too insignificant and not worthy of attention. Young front-line soldiers felt the cruelty and meaninglessness of life, felt unnecessary in the country for which they shed blood. Not seeing a future for themselves, they became disillusioned and abandoned their previous values.
Because they could not find a new meaning in life, young people became drunkards and led riotous lives. Due to their inability to adapt to the new society, many of them committed suicide or went crazy.

After the war they cannot find themselves

Now the expression “lost generation” is used to describe people who grew up during a turning point for the country . For example, in our country this is what the generation of the 90s is called - these are people whose youth fell during the years of perestroika.

Everything changed, the familiar world collapsed. A huge country fell apart, and old values lost their meaning. Honest and decent people became beggars, and swindlers and speculators came to power. Working honestly has become almost a disgrace.
Money began to rule life, and crime became the norm. The cult of consumption has become the main thing in society, spirituality has faded into the background.
a crisis of ideas about justice and moral standards in the minds That is, everything that was instilled in children at school and in the family turned out to be a relic and was not in demand in the new society. Many young people find themselves at a crossroads in life.
The ideals of the parents were rejected, but their own did not work out. was also clearly evident here . Difficult living conditions have led to people becoming cynical and selfish. And the main values became individualism and the principle of “every man for himself.”

Types of generations

Silent (1923 – 1943). Silent - because Stalin's repressions caused horror, accordingly, people tried to be invisible, this allowed them to survive in those times. Characterized by patience, devotion and suspicion.
Baby Boomers (1943 – 1963). After the war there was a surge in birth rates, hence the name. They are characterized by optimism, collectivism and hard work.
X (1963 – 1984). These years saw perestroika, which is why the rebels, as this generation is also called, strive for change. They do not tolerate patriarchy and fight for equality.
Y (1984 – 2000). They are also called millennials or generation zero. They want to get everything from life, so their activities are directed towards pleasure. They do not value knowledge, preferring “useful acquaintances” to achieve goals.
Z (2003 – 2023). The Zetas, unlike the Yers, understand that they need education. Freedom-loving and retreating in the face of difficulties. Capricious, cautious and not responsible. And also developed, because there are so many opportunities around, only the lazy will not use them.

Generational conflict - why is it difficult for the older generation to understand young people?

Often the older generation believes that their experience allows them to impose their views and rules of behavior on young people. And young people, in turn, are confident that they have sufficient knowledge to decide for themselves how to live.
And age is not a sign of wisdom for them. In addition, young people are characterized by an unconscious desire to get rid of control and excessive care.
On this basis, disagreements and mutual claims and generational conflict arise between people of different ages.

Let us list the main reasons why it is difficult for the older generation to understand young people and a generational conflict arises:

Internal restrictions and prohibitions. As people age, they become more conservative and find it difficult to renounce their beliefs. The older generation is often unable to perceive reality due to lack of flexibility. They do not understand that the world is changing at an incredible speed, and new times require the formation of different thinking and standards.
Excessive concern. Parents are always worried about their children and cannot admit that their child has grown up. Therefore, elders strive to protect younger ones from mistakes. It seems to them that the lifestyle that children lead can lead to failures and life problems. For this reason, parents tend to impose their views on their offspring, so that it would be “what is best.”
Lack of demand in society. It is known that our era is characterized by the cult of youth. A personality is assessed by its ability to act effectively and easily adapt to new living conditions. But older people cannot perform the tasks that modern life dictates to them. Unfortunately, the attitude towards older people as useless members of society is increasingly prevailing in the mass consciousness.
Inability to keep up with the modern pace of life. The older generation is at a loss from the huge amount of new information that is poured out on them every day. It is not easy for them to master new gadgets, electrical appliances, and computer programs. Therefore, they prefer to live and work “the old fashioned way” and do not understand the desire of young people for new technologies.
Unmet need for communication. It's no secret that old people often feel unnecessary to their loved ones. Therefore, they are offended by young people, reproaching them for lack of attention and respect. It turns out to be a vicious circle: on the one hand, the older generation wants to communicate and be useful, on the other hand, such communication is replete with reproaches and accusations and develops into a quarrel.

Misunderstanding

Social network

X – feel good on social networks, prefer to communicate more with their reference groups and professional interests. Pages are often closed.

Y – live in social networks, the main thing for them is communication, trends, exchange of information and emotions.

Z – they clearly work to grow the audience of their pages and video channels, they want to create their own channels, their own audience.

Example: Dani has her own video blog on YouTube and a VKontakte page. His uncle has pages on Twitter, Facebook, VKontakte and Instagram and his own channel on Telegram. Dani's parents only have Facebook accounts.

How to overcome the generation gap?

Due to generational conflict, often arise between close people , leading to quarrels and resentments. Unwilling to compromise, parents and children may not communicate for a long time, and a chasm arises between them.
Of course, the perception of the world by relatives of different ages is significantly different. But the views on general concepts, such as “good” and “evil”, “good” and “bad”, can be the same among old people and young people, as they are formed in the process of communication and education. The beliefs and values of parents are instilled in children through personal examples. But during their own lives, all this is used by children in new conditions and is therefore interpreted in their own way. We can say that conflict in the family is not based on age differences, but on personal relationships.
Is misunderstanding between older and younger generations an insoluble conflict? And what can become a condition for a harmonious relationship between them?

Is it possible to resolve the conflict?
In order to improve relationships with loved ones of another generation and smooth out the “sharp edges” as much as possible when communicating with them, listen to the following recommendations:

When talking, do not interrupt your interlocutor. Give him the opportunity to finish the conversation. And it doesn’t matter how old he is, whether he’s younger or older than you. Listen respectfully to the person's point of view.
Never raise your voice . Express your views calmly and reasonably.
Don't try to insist on your own. Always look for a compromise solution that will suit both you and your opponent.
Don't be rude and don't avoid answering, thinking that no one will understand you anyway. Always answer the question asked.
Try to understand the other person's point of view. You may not agree with her, but try to look at the problem through the eyes of your older or younger relative. Understand that everyone has the right to their own opinion.

But you just need to talk.
Remember that problems of mutual understanding between “fathers” and “children” happen in every family. The main thing is to resolve generational conflicts based on your love for children and respect for the elderly.

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Disagreements in adolescence

In the last 50 years since the end of World War II, the opposition between parents and children has been practically postulated by culture. A stable concept of “teenage rebellion” has emerged. This is behavior that is expected of a growing child.

If we approach this from the historical and cultural side, then this is a young concept that no one had heard of a hundred years ago. And such a word as “teenager” did not exist in any lexicon. Why has everything changed in our time?

This phenomenon is largely due to the fact that the traditional patriarchal structure both in society and in the family has collapsed. Therefore, if previously it was generally accepted that the wisest bearers of truth were the elders of the clan, now all hope rests with the younger generation. Using the example of specific family situations, all this can give rise to many problems, for example:

In teenage slang, the concept of “parents” is not used as such. In most cases, it is replaced by such contemptuous words: rodaki, ancestors - people who are no longer relevant and have no right to vote, since they “suck”, and meanwhile the youth “rules”.
The opinion of parents is by default perceived by children as outdated: “what do you understand about this!”, “Mom, no one has been saying (thinking, doing) that way for a long time.”

To improve relationships between generations and mitigate emerging conflicts, it is necessary to:

Don't lose your sense of humor. Even if you are very offended and unpleasant, you should not take everything to heart.
Try to remember yourself and your behavior as a teenager. If you have any old photographs or diaries, be sure to look and re-read them. And also talk to friends and parents who can tell you what you were like.
When there is a calm and good atmosphere in the house, talk to your child about how you, too, were once in this state. Try to make this conversation friendly rather than didactic.
And it is also recommended to tell you that your parents also seemed outdated and stupid to you.
Reassure yourself with the thought that adolescence will eventually pass. Who among us, at the age of 14, did not think that he knew everything about life and people? However, life experience softens everyone.
When the situation becomes more and more difficult, it should be remembered that, through conflict, children develop their own position in life.

Family

X (1964–1984), Dani’s parents are a generation of late marriages. They look for a couple for a long time, they have doubts, which is why there are many divorces, but when they find theirs, they stay with them until the end.

Y (1985–2003), Dani’s uncle , begin to get married earlier than X. According to statistics, they have many early marriages, which means they are ready for family relationships early.

Z (2004–2024) , Danya – fairly high family values, in the classical sense – one family for life. This is promoted everywhere, children see and hear it.

Completion

And that’s all for today, dear readers! You will get more information on how to correctly argue your opinion in order to persuade people around you to agree with it from this article.

Take care of yourself, and, of course, be happy! The material was prepared by psychologist, Gestalt therapist, Alina Zhuravina

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