“Parting is a little death.” YOU are no more, but you just can’t come to terms with what happened: you dream of bringing your loved one back, but you don’t know how to do it. What to say, how to behave, how to interest you?
The degree of tragedy of the situation for the girl increases when he, and not she, was the initiator of the breakup. The position of the abandoned person is always more painful: he was not asked, he was not consulted. Everything was decided for him. How does he feel? Powerlessness, loneliness, injustice, the desire to take revenge and turn the situation around in your own way. How to make your ex-boyfriend chase you and regain your lost relationship is the topic of today’s article.
Think about why the relationship ended
The first thing you need to do is seriously evaluate how the relationship ended. As stated earlier, if he cheated on you or abused you in any way, he is not your man. Take some time to figure out what went wrong. You may have to have a heart-to-heart with him, which may be a little painful, but it can be very helpful in the long run. This way, you can both take responsibility for your role in the relationship's failure and look for positive ways to overcome these obstacles if you get back together in the future. You must be willing to admit and apologize for your role in the breakup. Your ex will be more likely to give it another try if he sees you handling the breakup like a reasonable and mature person.
What do men want
You want to see him tearing out the hair on his head, shedding bitter tears, because he realized what he had done, and begs you to get back together. Or, to put it less dramatically, you want him to start showing signs of attention again and offer to restore the broken relationship. The task is quite feasible.
The human psyche (no matter male or female) is designed in such a way that we pay attention to what interests us. We consider interesting what evokes certain feelings and emotions in us. Therefore, in order for an ex-boyfriend to start chasing you again, you need to aim at his emotional sphere - to evoke positive responses addressed to you. And to do this, you must know what men want in a relationship, what attracts them to a woman - her inner world and appearance. So, the list of men's “wants”:
- A man who has been in a loving relationship for some time gets used to his partner. Therefore, the main emphasis must be placed on novelty, since it is this that often becomes the trigger that gives rise to male interest. Even a “married man” often glances at young ladies passing by, being married to the winner of a beauty contest. Someone else's woman is different. Unknown, unknown and therefore so alluring. Therefore, first of all, change your hairstyle, makeup, update your wardrobe. Men love with their eyes. Changes in appearance will definitely not go unnoticed. Especially if your image becomes more sexy.
- Turn on the “accessible inaccessibility” mode. What does it mean? Communicate with him politely and friendly, while at the same time demonstrating your disinterest in him as a man. No flirting. Only friendship or friendly relations. It is important. The fact is that men do not know how to be friends with attractive girls who do not need anything from them. The hunting instinct provokes the stronger sex to conquer an “impregnable fortress.” And the more indifferent you are, the louder the voice of his instinct.
- Create the illusion of competition in him - play on jealousy. Any man, first of all, is an owner (they are even jealous of their exes!). Secondly, he always wants to be the first among his own kind. Therefore, show that you are in demand among men, for example, by accidentally mentioning an invitation to a date or flirting on the phone in his presence (let your friend specifically call at the right moment). But the main thing here is not to overdo it: a woman who has too many admirers automatically becomes fallen in men’s eyes. It's a very fine line. Don't step over it.
In total, you have 3 points: novelty, hunting instinct, competition. Use them to arouse your ex's interest.
Show him that you can be happy without him
If you're wondering how to get his attention, the best advice we can offer is to be happy on your own. If he sees that you can live without him, it will make him want you even more. Men love independent women, not those who cling to them. Develop your own interests and passions. Go and live your life. Sitting at home, crying and moping will not bring you anything good, and it certainly will not help you win his affection. And whatever you do, don't call, text, or visit him constantly or text him while intoxicated. Distance him even further with this behavior. Call or text one of your best friends and save yourself from humiliation.
If your ex sees you moving on and even being happy without him, it will make you even more desirable. Post pictures on social networking sites of you and your friends at parties or on the beach, etc. of you laughing and smiling so that he can see that you are living your life to the fullest, with or without him.
The main stages of returning love to a relationship
Bringing back your beloved man is not easy; it requires a lot of effort. Stages of getting your ex back:
- Become beautiful, take care of yourself, change your wardrobe.
- Go in for sports, lose weight to ideal shape if you are overweight.
- Start a new social circle, become active.
- Learn to emphasize your strengths and hide your weaknesses.
- Play with a man, give him the opportunity to become a hunter, do not reveal all the cards at once.
Change your attitude towards a guy only for the better in order to become the ideal and only one for him. Any man needs care, if you provide it to him, then the relationship will be restored.
Maintain your appearance
It's so easy to let yourself fall apart after a breakup. You either gain or lose weight and usually let yourself go. You will stop caring about how you look. Your eyes are red and puffy from constant crying, and who needs makeup? No matter how difficult it may be, if you want to win him back, you need to control yourself. Take care of yourself. Make sure you get enough sleep and eat right. Overeating or starving yourself is not a way to get his attention. Get up in the morning, take a shower and wash your hair. Put on your cutest outfit, do your hair and makeup. Show him that you are confident and attractive. Show him what he's missing. This doesn't mean you should send him sexy lingerie pictures or post half-naked pictures of yourself online. Show him that you are a lady. Keep yourself in shape!
How to attract a guy's attention - good looks will help you
I think no one will argue with the fact that female beauty attracts admiring male gazes like a magnet.
The beauties don’t even need to do anything: it’s enough for them to appear in the room to attract the attention of all the guys present, while the ugly ones are content with being ignored or with sympathetic glances.
So stop being ugly!
Become a beauty!
To attract guys, you need to put in order:
- Your skin should be beautiful and healthy - this can be achieved with proper home care and visits to a cosmetologist.
Make an appointment for eyebrow correction and tinting (if necessary).
Learn how to apply makeup correctly.
It doesn't matter if you have long hair or a stylish haircut (although most guys are attracted to the first option), it should be clean, healthy and well-groomed.
Arms and legs.
Regular manicure and pedicure in a salon is a must-have for every normal girl, regardless of her age.
Here you need to work in three directions:
- (if necessary) and pump up;
- get rid of excess vegetation;
- take a shower twice a day, use body creams/lotions.
- Clothes should not only be clean and intact (jeans with designer holes don’t count), they should also be fashionable and sexy.
Just remember that from sexuality to vulgarity there is only one step, don’t take it.
Be happy
If you are still socializing, make sure you remain cheerful and positive. Don't go on and on about how much you miss him and how broken your heart is (even if it's true). Keep things light and natural. Tell us about your achievements. Ask him about his day and how his friends and family are doing. Show him that you are a happy, optimistic person.
Appearance
Many women, having become interested in a man, rush from one extreme to another. Either she is too fat or thin, and her whole body needs to be carefully hidden, or her figure is the height of perfection, which, of course, needs to be exposed to the maximum. No, no, no, you can't do that. In the first case, the man most likely will not pay attention to you at all, but in the second he will take you for a vulgar, accessible woman. It is necessary to observe the golden mean:
Dress femininely, avoid men's clothes in your wardrobe.
Emphasize only one of your advantages - gorgeous breasts, long legs, elastic hips.
Give preference to light, flowing fabrics in light or bright colors.
Choose shoes with small, comfortable heels.
Wear light makeup and leave your hair loose or tied up not too tightly.
Play sports. Absolutely everyone likes a toned body.
Advice. Forget about your complexes. A man would rather sense your insecurities than notice any flaws. In addition, a well-groomed woman is always beautiful, so everything is in your hands. Choose the right clothes, experiment with makeup and hairstyles, and that's it, half the success is in your pocket.
Get your thoughts together
Do not under any circumstances allow your life to fall apart without him. Keep working on moving forward in life. Stay focused on your studies or your career. Keep your finances safe and secure. Don't make any crazy, impulsive purchases that you'll regret later and will only drain your bank account. Show him that you are completely independent. And whatever you do, don't throw yourself at other men. If he hears that you have meaningless hobbies, he will think that you are no longer interested in him and will lose any respect he once had for you. Don't throw yourself at him or any other man.
If you remember this simple and wise advice on how to get him back, you shouldn't have any problems if he really is your person. Don't force yourself on him and never ask him to come back. Continue to be the amazing woman you were when he fell in love with you the first time. If he's really for you and you follow our tips, you could be on your way to reuniting with the love of your life!
Tags: relationships, psychology
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Rules for first communication
If the problem of how to attract the guy you like to you has been solved, you should move on to the next stage - positive communication.
We think every girl will agree with the statement that attracting male attention is only half the battle. It is extremely important to consolidate the result obtained without spoiling the impression of yourself during communication.
The rules of good form are as follows:
- Be sincerely interested in what your interlocutor is talking about. It’s great if you discover common interests, this will help build further communication. But in a conversation, do not “go too far” by asking the young man things of, let’s say, a personal nature.
- Wanting to embellish themselves, girls begin to invent completely incredible stories about themselves. Imagine if your relationship develops further, and the lie (embellishment) is then revealed. A man may decide that deception over trifles is a feature of your character.
- Don’t pull the “blanket” of the conversation onto yourself. In fact, representatives of the stronger sex love to talk about themselves, so provide this opportunity to your interlocutor. Listen carefully, trying to remember the information. A few memorable facts about the guy that you say at your next meeting (if there is one) will show your interest.
It’s easy to spoil the dialogue that has begun, since you are just opening up to each other. To ensure that communication continues to flow in the direction you want, avoid things like:
- memories of a former lover and old relationships;
- comparison of the interlocutor with a former heart friend;
- complaints about life's troubles;
- vulgar words and, especially, profanity.
There are a lot of tips on how to please a guy. But love is so mysterious and inexplicable that it is completely impossible to reduce it to certain rules and recommendations. Feelings between a boy and a girl can flare up suddenly - after a single phrase, look or touch. However, if you like a young man, you can and should try available methods of attracting attention to your person.
Hello, I am Nadezhda Plotnikova. Having successfully completed her studies at SUSU as a specialized psychologist, she devoted several years to working with children with developmental problems and consulting parents on issues of raising children. I use the experience gained, among other things, in creating articles of a psychological nature. Of course, I in no way claim to be the ultimate truth, but I hope that my articles will help dear readers deal with any difficulties.
How to attract a guy’s attention - 5 ideal ways + 5 tips on how girls shouldn’t behave.
That's why some girls easily attract the attention of guys, while others, no matter how hard they try, cannot comprehend this art?
Of course, being born with a natural one is a serious advantage in the fight against other predators for the stronger sex, but only a few receive such a gift at birth.
Most girls are looking for their own way to attract a guy's attention.
.
They act through trial and error, expose themselves to ridicule more than once, win and lose, until they finally find a secret that helps guys like them.
You won't have to go through such a long and difficult path if you listen to my advice.
How can you interest a guy during a date?
If your conversation on the phone went well, the young man will probably invite you on a date, for which it is important to prepare correctly and thoroughly so as not to lose the interest shown in your person:
- First, you need to think through your image to look stunning. Wear your favorite dress that makes you look irresistible. But keep in mind that if a guy prefers to wear jeans with T-shirts, then in an evening dress next to him you will look out of place.
- Talk about the same things you talk about on the phone. At least you can start a conversation with this, and then the conversation itself will be meaningful.
- Behave well-mannered and discreetly on a date. Think about what usually irritates you personally in people. Eliminate any irritating factors from your behavior.
Feed the attraction
The main instinct of men was and remains procreation. In this regard, physical attraction to a woman often plays a key role in the lives of guys. To become vital for your loved one, use the entire available arsenal of femininity. This could be an attractive appearance, hoarseness in the voice, sensual laughter or, for example, emotionality during love games. Use all available means to arouse the interest of your chosen one.
Arouse a man's interest: Pixabay