Every day we are immersed in everyday affairs. We run in a circle “work - home - work”, and problems overwhelm us. Worry and anxiety are growing. One feels emptiness and fatigue, which tends to develop into depression. And I really want peace and tranquility, to live in harmony with myself. Self-improvement and self-knowledge can help you cope with all adversity and find peace. So where to start with personal growth and self-development? Let's look into this.
What the article is about:
- In search of ways of personal growth and self-development
- Self-development - 7 simple ways
- How to develop the right habits
- The key to personal growth and self-development
We are born to understand the world and ourselves, so all activities that lead to increased awareness and development of critical thinking skills are considered higher forms of activity. A contemplative life, dedicated to the search for truth and constant reflection on one's own destiny, brings a person the greatest joy.
On the other hand, the greatest suffering and grief are associated with an unreflective life, the futility of which we often realize only on our deathbed.
where to start self-development
Success is inseparable from a conscious and rich life.
Personal self-realization
In addition to the basic needs at the level of the body, there is an instinctive desire for self-realization, when, when interacting with the outside world, a person displays talents and knowledge through actions.
It is possible to succeed as a person provided that you have developed intelligence and internal freedom that determines your occupation.
The process of becoming begins with the search for purpose. To identify goals and dominant traits, personal, material, and time factors should be analyzed.
Self-realization plan
- Ask yourself what you can handle easily.
- Immerse yourself, impartially evaluate negative and positive qualities.
- List what you would like to do. Intentions must be true, and not imposed by social stereotypes. Often problems arise because a person chooses the wrong field. An artist at heart cannot become a good financier.
- Next to it, write down the aspects necessary for a particular type of activity.
- Compare notes, note the prevailing character traits. Calculate how much time and money you are willing to spend on mastering a new profession or organizing a business. Decide who is your authority. Compare the facts with reality, form an idea of the future.
Take care of yourself physically
Physical capabilities undoubtedly play a very important role in order to feel happy and to experience a better quality of life.
When we feel bad or hurt, we can’t help but be upset about it, feel sorry for ourselves and justify our idleness.
To get rid of this problem, your physical condition must be at such a level that you do not even think about it. You do this by exercising, eating healthy, and getting enough sleep.
Without suitable oil, water, fuel and systematic maintenance, a car cannot drive normally. Its parts begin to fail one by one until the car completely falls apart.
The same happens with our body. Take care of your body. Give him the opportunity to act in your interests, and not vice versa.
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Choosing a priority direction for self-development
Now let’s talk about how to determine in which area of life to start self-development, if it seems that there are too many problems: not enough money, and you need to improve your physical shape, and you need to learn English. There are so many things to do that you don’t know what to do.
The bad news: you won't be able to get everything at once. And it’s better to set a goal in one direction and gradually move towards it, giving it priority.
The good news is that by regularly engaging in self-development in one area of your life, you will quietly begin to improve in all others.
Each person chooses the priority direction for development himself. For some it is a career, for others it is personal life, etc.
Psychologists identify eight main areas of life that are most important to most people. It is convenient to depict them in the form of a circle divided into sectors. Each sector is allocated to one main life area.
Right now you can rate each area of your life on a scale from 0 to 10 and connect all the ratings with lines. As a result, you will see a clear example of how balanced your life is. Here is one example:
A frequently encountered example of a person who spares no effort in making money, forgetting about health, friends, spiritual growth, and communication with family.
In fact, thanks to a huge amount of psychological research, we can confidently say that a person feels happy when there is satisfaction in all areas of life. There is no point in putting all your efforts into one area and forgetting about others. Yes, you can achieve good success in this area, but why if you feel unhappy at the same time? Unfortunately, this is most often understood too late, when precious time is irretrievably gone.
Therefore, it is better to start self-development from the area to which you gave the lowest rating.
Conclusion
And as usual, after a general overview of the topic, I will write my personal opinion. Whether you agree with him or not, decide for yourself
I believe that self-development should begin with developing the skill of managing your mind and your attention. In my opinion, this is the basis for the success of any other self-development activity
After all, it is the lack of self-control skills that most often becomes the reason that a person cannot regularly engage in self-development.
How many times have you started losing weight, doing fitness, or learning English and giving up? There are too many distractions in the modern world: TV series, social networks, television, the Internet, a huge flow of information and information noise.
Thousands of signals around are trying their best to attract our attention and pinch off a piece of energy.
And the most unpleasant thing is that most of this information is simply useless and often harmful. If you hear good information, it means they want to force you to buy something. If you hear any news about events in the world, then they most likely want to intimidate you. And every little bit of information is trying to evoke at least some emotion in you.
To achieve your goals in self-improvement, you simply need to learn how to direct your energy in the right direction, and give a tough rebuff to everything that tries to distract your attention without your permission. And from all this I want to conclude that you need to start self-development and self-improvement with meditation
Meditation is training to control your mind. Meditation is a platform that ensures the effectiveness of self-development, be it learning foreign languages, public speaking, or physical development. We can say that the mind is a tool that we use to change ourselves. You shouldn’t be like the fool in the parable who spent three hours sawing a log with a dull saw because he doesn’t have time to sharpen the saw. Prepare a good tool first, and then with the help of it things will go much faster
And from all this I want to conclude that you need to start self-development and self-improvement with meditation. Meditation is training to control your mind. Meditation is a platform that ensures the effectiveness of self-development, be it learning foreign languages, public speaking, or physical development. We can say that the mind is a tool that we use to change ourselves. You shouldn’t be like the fool in the parable who spent three hours sawing a log with a dull saw because he doesn’t have time to sharpen the saw. Prepare a good tool first, and then with the help of it things will go much faster.
Developing the mind, the ability to manage yourself, your attention through meditation - this is where you need to start self-development
Error self-development plan
In order for your plan to work, try to follow the rules when developing it:
- Choose the right time to compile it. You should not do this hastily or in a bad mood or tired.
- Make both annual and weekly plans to see your final goals and a detailed algorithm of actions.
- Consider your options. There is no point in including diving training in your tasks if you don’t even have a vacation in the next six months.
- Balance your resources and performance. Today you are full of strength and energy, but tomorrow you don’t want to do anything; fluctuations in physical and emotional activity affect the process of realizing your desires.
- Make a plan for the sole purpose of executing it, and not for fun or because it is fashionable.
- Don't be afraid of failure.
- Adapt actions to real-world conditions.
- Consider the possibility of deviations from the plan and adjust it accordingly.
- Reflect the algorithm of actions and goals clearly (in the form of a table, graph, abstract, etc.).
- Create goals that inspire you to achieve them.
- Don't miss scheduled events.
- Believe in yourself and your success!
- Track your progress.
- Look for support, not only among close people, but also in interest groups.
Do not perceive the compiled algorithm of actions as the enslavement of your will; the plan should not burden your life, but, on the contrary, stimulate and inspire development.
Health
Nutrition
- Reduce your sugar intake. The World Health Organization recommends eating a maximum of 25 grams of sugar per day. A Snickers bar contains 30 grams.
- Eat no more than 5 grams of salt per day.
- Don't overeat. Scientists have found that people who don't overeat live longer.
- Don't eat fast food.
- Don't eat flour. Favorite pies contribute to obesity and increase the risk of diabetes and cardiovascular diseases. They also cause excessive gas formation and bloating.
- Drink more water rather than tea and coffee. These drinks lead to yellowing of teeth and leaching of vitamins and microelements. If you eat them with food, it will “rot and ferment” in the stomach.
Physical activity
- The WHO recommendation is 150 minutes of physical activity per week. Run, do push-ups, pull-ups, do abs and squats.
- Walk 10,000 steps - 7 kilometers per day.
- Do exercises.
Dream
- Sleep 6 to 8 hours a night.
- Sleep in a dark room. Otherwise, the hormone melatonin, which is necessary for the functioning of the body, will not be produced.
Treatment and prevention of diseases
- Once every 6-12 months, undergo a full examination to identify diseases in the early stages.
- Take vitamins. For example, ascorbic acid.
Personal development
- Learn a foreign language.
- Read 1 book per month or week.
- Attend seminars, courses and trainings on self-development.
- Find a mentor. All successful people have had a mentor. Warren Buffett learned the art of investing from Benjamin Graham. Bill Gates learned about the laws of wealth from Warren Buffett. Mark Zuckerberg learned to run a company from Steve Jobs.
- Learn something new every day. Read a new article, learn a new skill, listen to a new talk.
- Find a role model. What kind of person epitomizes who you want to become? I admire Elon Musk, Neil Patel, Brian Dean and Jeff Bezos. I read their books, watch their speeches, study their biography, try to copy their habits and behavior.
Get rid of bad habits
Stop it:
Imagine how many books you can read in this time.
40 pages per hour * 4 hours = 160 pages per day. 160 * 30 = 4800 pages in thirty days. 24 books a month!
How many good changes will happen to you if you read so much? A lot of!
Replace them with good habits
- By reading;
- Sports;
- Studying foreign languages;
- Taking courses;
- Intellectual games;
- Daily planning;
- Yoga;
- Meditation;
- Setting goals.
Let's start self-improvement
Working on yourself is very hard and long work. Regardless of what social class a person belongs to, he can improve himself and his life as soon as he takes action. It is better to start self-development by reading specialized literature.
Literature
The foundations of personal self-development lie in learning new information and mastering new skills. A person’s personal growth always begins with increasing his cultural level. Those who read a lot are better able to formulate their thoughts, their speech is beautiful and correct.
Books about the basics of personal self-development are also widely popular. There are a huge number of them, and choosing from this list will be quite easy. Most often, psychologists recommend:
“Be the best version of yourself” M.D. Ryan. A book about promises to yourself, good habits and ways to develop them. “A Whole Life” M. W. Hansen, L. Hewitt, D. Canfield
This raises the question of setting the right life values and how important self-affirmation is. “Get Out of Your Comfort Zone” by B. Tracy
The leading publication covering personal growth in psychology. It discusses a plan to work on yourself by neglecting your life principles. “This year I...” D. Waldschmidt. Reveals the main ways of development and shows life examples of successful people.
After reading at least one of these books, a person rethinks his values and receives motivation for further action. There is no need to be skeptical of everything that is written there, but you should not follow it blindly either. Any plan must be tailored to the individual.
Quitting habits
Working on yourself requires improvements not only in the intellectual sphere. First of all, a person needs to get rid of bad habits. Some of them take away his health, while others take his time.
The desire for self-development must begin with a healthy lifestyle. If you can’t quit smoking right away, then you need to develop willpower and fight your desires. The same goes for alcohol, drugs, love of junk food and a passive lifestyle.
Habits that take up free time are nothing more than the Internet, television, laziness, etc. By giving up one of these items, you can free up several hours to spend time with your family, relax or work.
21 day principle
It is known that it takes 21 days to consolidate a habit. Based on this principle, many methods of self-development and programs for optimizing your life, home or relationships have been created.
The most popular of them are:
- “Purple bracelet” - a person must wear a lilac bracelet on one hand for 21 days. But there is one important detail: as soon as the person complains, gets angry, or quarrels with someone, the bracelet is put on the other hand, and the report starts all over again.
- “Fly Lady” system – improving your home and creating comfort. For 21 working days, it is suggested to divide housework into small parts and complete them step by step. By the end of the course, most everyday worries become automatic, and a person does them without thinking or forcing himself.
By performing the same action during this period, you can introduce correct, healthy habits into your life. This way you can train yourself to drink a glass of water on an empty stomach or do the necessary work every day.
Reward system
For both men and women, in any path of self-development, not only the final result is important, but also the intermediate one. Moving forward fractionally is much more effective than having one big dream.
To make it easier to complete many segments, you need to develop a reward system for yourself. It can be anything depending on the preferences and capabilities of the person. Some people reward themselves with a new item or a trip abroad, while for others a luxury would be a cup of freshly brewed coffee or chocolate cake.
Travel is a great reward for success
The key to personal growth and self-development
You are worth what you know, and if you are smart, you can do whatever you want and reach the heights you dream of. A person who lacks knowledge is a world without sun.
Self-education is one of the main tools on the path of personal growth and self-development of a person.
A man who knows nothing cannot live. This is due to a simple addiction. Access to information guides our thoughts. A real-life example is a Japanese soldier who continued to fight the enemy several decades after the end of World War II. A good illustration from literature is Don Quixote fighting windmills. Ignorance and, by extension, lack of knowledge leads to poor decisions and actions. This simple fact alone should make us understand how important knowledge is.
Formal education will teach us to write and read, but we must acquire the knowledge necessary to fulfill our own calling. Most people find self-education an unpleasant task. People make the assumption that there is no need to learn anything new if there is some reason to avoid it. We like old views because they are part of what gives us psychological comfort. Therefore, we can put much more effort into maintaining the status quo in our minds than learning new things. And even if we need to change our lives, even slightly, to learn something new, we don't.
Life is change, and stagnation of thought makes the world run away from us, because what surrounds us moves and changes much faster than we do. We ourselves know too few things and must live by trusting others. However, borrowing the mind from someone else is a risky step, for there are few good people, and many dangers.
Continuous learning is the best way to achieve better results. Therefore, a reasonable person sets himself the goal of going to bed smarter than he woke up. Reading a lot is the best way to educate yourself, because reading is the essence of the process of lifelong education.
continuous learning and improvement
The best books on self-development and personal growth – TOP 7
The books contain the wisdom and experience of many generations. They help us avoid wasting time looking for answers and making common mistakes.
- "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" - Stephen Covey
- “How to put things in order. The Art of Stress-Free Productivity - David Allen
- "To hell with all of it! Go ahead and do it" - Richard Branson
- "The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari" - Robin Sharma
- “The Psychology of Influence” - Robert Cialdini
- "Unleash the Giant Within" - Tony Robbins
- “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” - Carnegie Dale
We were born to know the world and ourselves, and also to bring benefit and joy to this world. And, most importantly, find and realize your purpose. A contemplative life devoted to the search for truth brings a person the greatest joy and recognition. Now you know where to start with personal growth and self-development.
Help in self-development
You should not rely only on yourself. This is how mistakes are most often made and control over the successes made is lost. Therefore, you constantly need to read new literature on issues of harmonizing your life, as well as gain knowledge and skills.
Fortunately, there is a huge amount of information, spiritual books and Eastern practices on improving contacts with people around you and with yourself. In such manuals you can find tips and methods for adjusting your behavior and well-being. If you are constantly guided by the instructions of those who have long embarked on the path of self-improvement, then a person moves along it much further than acting alone.
You need to constantly look after yourself. Every conflict avoided in a work team, a suppressed desire to criticize a friend’s new hairstyle, or patience shown with a slow cashier in a store moves a person one more step towards self-improvement. He quickly begins to notice what prevents him and those around him from establishing relationships.
Once again it is worth emphasizing that work on oneself must be done constantly. She does not tolerate interruptions or backtracking. As soon as a person manages to advance further, he feels the extraordinary joy of being. It is she who gives a new impetus to the next achievements.
Self-development means harmonizing relationships with yourself and with loved ones. And it is these changes in consciousness that make life truly happy.
What does self-development consist of?
There are a large number of elements of self-development, but we will highlight the most important and valuable of them:
- self-knowledge;
- self-awareness;
- increased self-confidence;
- improving learning skills;
- increased self-esteem (or decreased if it is too high);
- development of strengths and skills;
- developing skills needed for a career;
- improved health;
- study and application of methods of self-realization;
- increasing social status;
- fulfillment of aspirations;
- creation and implementation of a personal development plan;
- increasing social intelligence;
- increasing emotional intelligence;
- time management.
When we talk about self-development, it should also be said that mentoring is included in it. If you have mastered teaching techniques and are able to influence students in such a way that they progress as individuals, then you yourself are growing.
In addition to improving yourself, self-development comes through practice and research:
- Practice is expressed in the search for personal development methods, training programs, assessment systems, tools and techniques.
- As an area of research , topics of self-development appear in journals, books and websites in the fields of education, management, and economics of human development.
Women’s self-development: the most common areas of life
Among the most important areas that they would like to improve, women name relationships with the opposite sex (for unmarried people) and relationships in the family (for married people). Despite the desire to succeed in the profession, personal life is put first.
Loneliness does not always indicate that a woman is not doing anything for self-development. Even good housewives with an attractive appearance may not have a partner. The problem is often that a woman simply does not understand what kind of man she needs and what kind of relationship she wants to build with him. As a result, the partner has annoying shortcomings (smokes, spends a lot of time fishing or watching football matches), which forces him to break up. A man can also be completely absent from a woman’s life.
To meet your life partner, you should make a list of the personal qualities of the best partner for you. Write down the shortcomings that you are willing to put up with.
The psychological portrait is complemented by the physical one if it is important for you that a man has certain external features.
The imperfection of the family (naughty children, drinking husband) is often a reflection of our own imperfection. Try to understand what traits of your character caused your children to become disobedient. You may be too accommodating to their whims. Don't forget that you don't have to tolerate your drinking spouse. If a man has abdicated responsibility for his life, he is not capable of being the head of the family.
Psychology of Rubenstein
Self-knowledge and self-development of a person occurs in the process of communication with other people, so a person realizes his characteristics and works on personality characteristics. A person’s character is partly an innate thing associated with the type of nervous system, and partly acquired through life and accumulated experience.
To some extent, the study of character is related to Maslow’s theory, since a characterless person does not have a rigid value system, but a person with a strong character clearly understands his purpose and is confident in his coordinate system, adheres strictly to his line of behavior. The concept of “personality” arises as a result of self-awareness of one’s “I” and one’s actions.
Self-knowledge
Self-awareness arises as a result of human development, mastering new knowledge, understanding one’s capabilities, and managing physical processes. Independence develops in the process of mastering speech and service skills, and later manifests itself in the ability to set tasks, goals, and find the main direction for the development of one’s personality.
Self-knowledge and self-development of the individual are important components in a person’s life; these processes are clearly visible in adolescence, when many questions arise before the individual. A person determines his purpose in this world, the abilities and capabilities of his “I”. These are the first attempts to understand yourself.
Each person has character traits and personal qualities that distinguish him from others. Understanding oneself leads to the formation of personality, awareness of the need for changes in certain directions, and the establishment of one’s own principles of life.
A personality is a person with his own worldview, a clear position in life, which arose as a result of great conscious activity, understanding of himself and life in general.
Individuality - a bright, unique person
Personality is a more global concept, and its formation requires quite significant efforts, attention to this issue and determination.
Such a person has his own characteristics, a “handwriting”, and consciously distinguishes himself from the general mass of people, which presupposes independent thinking and the presence of willpower. At the same time, the depth of personality is determined by the richness of the inner world and relationships with people.
Self-isolation leads to devastation of a person, although to a certain extent it is necessary for carrying out internal work and understanding one’s essence. A personality feature is the ability to look at the world from the outside for a more complete understanding of processes.
A developed person also helps others in the process of self-development. A real personality cannot cause indifference; there can be friends or enemies. Such a person always has strength and an active beginning. Self-awareness develops along with a person throughout life; self-reinterpretation occurs in connection with new experiences.
Each person goes through the process of understanding life, asks himself questions and finds answers, understanding what is most important for him and brings value. Accumulated experience and understanding of life leads to the formation of wisdom. Personality is created and built by a person throughout his conscious life, each person develops in a special way.
It is very important to carry out self-knowledge and self-development in a temporary period and ask questions: what was I like? - what am I? - what do I want to be? However, it is important to understand that a person needs to develop his existing potential, and in the process of labor and creation of something, the personality grows. There is a great relationship between a person and his result of activity
Personality
A person is always of interest if he can create something significant and it is clear that this is not the limit of possibilities. The development of personality over time can be tracked through human activity, in which it manifests itself and constantly develops.
A person’s characteristics are not always at the forefront of actions, but can also be a consequence. And abilities develop as a result of constant practice; the more attention a person directs to a certain area, the higher the likelihood of success in it and achieving high results.
Each person has his own life story, which can be reflected in an autobiography or resume; they will contain data about the person’s training, work, achievements - thus, the relationship of human development through activity can be traced.
In order to become a historical figure, you need to do things, create creations that will be in the public domain and go down in the history of society.
Start studying your favorite field of activity
It’s great when a person has clearly decided on his choice of life path from the very beginning and works at a job he loves. But this is not always the case, and not everyone goes to work as if it were a holiday.
Go to work like it's a holiday
After you have broken into yourself and built your own hierarchy of values, the time comes to take the next step on the path of self-improvement and personal development - start doing what you really love.
Let's say you work as a sales manager for plumbing fixtures, and in childhood and adolescence you were a great drawer.
They painted and then abandoned it - their parents insisted, or it was a lack of faith in their own abilities, or they considered this area of activity unprofitable - it doesn’t matter
This unrealized potential of yours, this talent buried in the ground, remains with you, lives in your soul, giving rise to a feeling of dissatisfaction and melancholy. Cast aside fears and doubts, do not think that others may consider you crazy. Get back to what actually brings you satisfaction.
Don't be afraid to learn. Our time provides ample opportunities for this: educational literature, online courses, seminars, trainings, classes with coaches.
How to make reflection a daily habit?
It’s not enough to start self-development; it’s important to make this process a daily habit and apply it in your daily activities. Simple rules can help with this.
Start writing a diary. Of course, you may get used to thinking without writing, but keeping your own journal will help you crystallize your thoughts. If you've written before but haven't been able to journal consistently, start by writing one sentence a day first. Then gradually increase the number of words. A good way to write more concisely is to simply write less than you want. This limitation will force you to weigh your words and avoid being too slow.
start keeping a diary
Every month it is worth reviewing your notes and summarizing the most important conclusions. Then you will see your own thoughts from a broader perspective. It is easy to identify the destructive habits and problems we face. If we notice that we are deviating from our goal, they will help us correct the course in which we are moving. In the long run, such information about our lives will bring incredible benefits.
Know yourself, your character, mind and emotions. “Know thyself” is the most famous maxim, received from the Seven Sages of Ancient Greece, engraved at the entrance to the Temple of Apollo at Delphi. Ancient philosophers knew that improvement begins with self-knowledge. If you don't understand who you are, you will never be in control or achieve happiness. Therefore, no one wants to be surrounded by a person who does not know who he is and why he lives. There is another important aspect of self-knowledge. Man is a cosmos in miniature, reflecting the entire Universe. This means that by exploring ourselves, we can explore fundamental laws. The goal of self-knowledge is not only to know one’s own personality, but also the laws that govern reality.
Practice self-reflection until you recognize your own natural talents (and weaknesses). Discovering your own talents is extremely valuable because acting in accordance with your own nature brings the greatest satisfaction. There is nothing more pleasant than working without difficulty. Discovering our own weaknesses will free us from the suffering that comes from not knowing our own limitations.
Know your own shortcomings. The fight against defects begins with their recognition. You can achieve more by identifying your own shortcomings. Maybe you lack the speed to act, or you can't stop and think about your own behavior. Maybe you are cruel and say a lot of things without thinking about how the people around you feel. If you noticed the shortcomings that cast a shadow on your life, you could deal with them.
Self-development in solving everyday problems
Find the best answer. No one will give you a more accurate answer than yourself. Do you want to meet her? With a specific question to address, ask yourself, “how am I feeling?”
Address the causes, not the consequences. Instead of increasing efforts and multiplying temporary solutions, focus on the limitations and obstacles that need to be removed to overcome the problem. Think about what works, and then eliminate anything that gets in the way of your work, starting with eliminating the most important obstacle.
Just think about it. No one is smart enough to make decisions right away without thinking. If you ever have problems, stop and think. The bigger the problem you're faced with, the longer you have to think through it all.
Tips for female self-realization
The success of self-realization largely depends on the relationship with yourself and the world around you. The company of like-minded people and self-love will help you achieve high results.
Enlist the support of loved ones
The support of loved ones is important for everyone who intends to improve one or another area of life. However, it is not always possible to find understanding. Some members of your family may have a more traditional outlook on life. Your grandmother believes that a woman should devote herself to her family and not do business. Parents may believe that a girl does not need to have a higher education.
Seek support from like-minded people and spend as much time with them as possible. When your relatives see your first successes, they will begin to view your actions more favorably. If you manage to achieve recognition in your chosen field, your loved ones will also support you.
Make new acquaintances
If possible, it is necessary to expand your circle of communication. Don't avoid introducing new people into your life. Every person, even those without a higher education, is able to teach something, tell something new. The appearance of new friends is necessary for a woman striving for self-realization and achieving goals, since the fulfillment of desires may depend on their presence in life. Communication is especially necessary for women who are forced to spend a lot of time outside of society (housewives).
It is necessary to monitor the quality of communication. You should avoid the company of people who have not achieved anything and who have a negative attitude towards the success of others. Communicating with those who treat you unkindly can be beneficial. Such people tend to notice your shortcomings, which will motivate you to work on yourself.
Learn to love yourself and others
Personal growth is impossible without self-love. If you consider yourself unworthy of the best, all your efforts will be in vain. A girl who cannot love herself needs to start showing respect for herself. Make 2 lists of your best qualities and achievements in life. You can respect yourself for your kindness, your ability to sing or cook. Be glad that you were able to get a degree in economics or buy an apartment without the help of relatives.
You also need to show love and respect to the people around you. Every person gets what he gives. Find bright qualities in your friends and family. Try not to pay attention to their shortcomings. Don't be shy to express love to your loved ones. People you don't know can be politely praised and thanked for small services. The expression of feelings must be sincere. Don't ingratiate yourself or flatter.
Don't give up
Be prepared for the fact that obstacles await you on the way to your goal, which you need to treat as calmly as possible. Changes in life always mean leaving your comfort zone. Remember that a leader is not someone who does everything easily and simply. A leader should be considered a person who is able to continue what he started, despite the obstacles that arise. You need to notice not only big, but also small victories. Perhaps you haven't found the strength to go for a morning run. But today you woke up half an hour earlier than usual.
Don't stop there
Less demanding people tend to stop at the results achieved. However, if there are no new aspirations, development stops. Having learned one foreign language, you can always start learning another, more complex one. If your income has reached the desired level of 50 thousand rubles per month, try to achieve an income of 70 thousand rubles per month. A person who has received everything he needs can use his potential to help other people.
Simple ways to start personal growth and self-development
So where to start with personal growth and self-development? Here are 7 simple steps to start this journey.
Think about your destiny. Think about tomorrow, and preferably many months in advance. You can't anticipate the unexpected, but you can always prepare for it. A person who has time to predict the course of accidents shows great foresight. It is better to avoid difficult situations than to solve them later. Take care of the future because tomorrow will not take care of itself.
Reflect on the past. If you want your future to be better than your past, then start drawing conclusions from your own experiences. Anyone who does not return to his past, but gets lost in the whirlpool of everyday affairs, eventually loses clarity of reasoning.
Become a fool. It is easy to tell us: “I know what I think”, “I know what will happen tomorrow”, “I know what I like”, “I know what the truth is”, etc. However, if you change “ I know" to "I don't know", you will stimulate your mind to an unconventional way of reasoning. You will begin to explore thoughts and ideas that were previously unknown to you. Many people would become another Socrates if they believed that they knew little.
Learn faster. Science can be enriched when we not only “do” but also think “about what we do.” This means that we learn faster and better when we not only do something, but also reflect on it.
Don't be guided by your first thought, start thinking for yourself. Thinking does not mean learning from other people or remembering information. Thinking means focusing on one thing until we develop an idea about it. The most valuable thing is to think for yourself and develop your own ideas. The first thought is never the best idea, it is usually heard from someone else. Therefore, we should not focus completely on the first thought that comes to our mind, nor on the first conclusion that arises in our mind. Only by focusing on a problem for a long time can we transform a thought into an original idea. However, this cannot be done in short periods of time interrupted by Facebook and YouTube. The brain needs time and space to make original connections and synthesize thoughts.
Lead your life wisely. Living a full life requires a certain amount of restraint. We must spend more time thinking and not take more actions than necessary. In the midst of a lot of tasks, we can forget what is really important to us. The only thing we really have is time, which we must use wisely. It's stupid to waste your life doing mechanical things. Many people open their eyes too late, realizing that all their lives they have been doing something they didn’t want to do. Realizing that it is too late brings only sadness. Some people start searching when only ashes remain. They found each other too late.
Condense your life. Take inventory of your actions, and then eliminate the many meaningless actions, replacing them with one very significant one. By changing the ratio of activity to importance, you will reduce waste of resources and use your time more wisely.
Hurry up slowly. A wise person assumes in advance that rash actions end in failure. Some people act first and think later, then seeking explanations for their own behavior. However, we often waste too much time. A great skill is to act optimally. Think about possible obstacles and problems that may arise on the way to your goal, and then boldly get to work. The disadvantage of wise people is that they are too tormented by doubts, which keep them from daring actions.
Stop wasting your energy and relax
If we don't sleep, what do we usually do from 10 pm to 2 am ? I especially want to ask this question to every teenager.
It’s one thing when we spend time with friends or family and enjoy it, but it’s completely different when we watch TV or surf the Internet.
We often suffer from lack of time, but have we ever really thought about how much we spend on completely useless and meaningless things ? Time your day at least once to evaluate the usefulness of your daily activities.
Agree that if we stopped wasting our nights so uselessly, we could get a good rest, and then wake up ready to create our day according to our own rules, and not lament the lack of time for ourselves.
We all have certain obligations and we all have some desires.
Stop wasting time and take control of it so that your responsibilities do not take away all the precious time that you could spend on fulfilling your desires.
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Know your desires
Why do you do certain things? What motivates you when you make certain decisions day after day?
Why do you want one thing now, and after a while - something completely different?
Let's say why now you have a strong motivation to be strong, exercise, eat right, but after 5 minutes you find yourself making excuses not to do this?
And this question is posed not only for girls, who, in principle, tend to often change their desires, but it is relevant for absolutely everyone.
We are all convinced that we know ourselves perfectly , that is, we understand who we are and for what reason we perform certain actions. However, do not forget that you must be able to treat yourself objectively and, as it were, look at yourself from the outside.
Learn to notice the inconsistency of your desires. The most effective way to get at least a little closer to the possibility of personal growth is to become the master of your internal contradictions.
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Films for self-development: top 5 best
Now we invite you to watch these films for self-development
. They will help you strengthen your motivation, better understand yourself and your desires, believe in your strength and be inspired for new achievements!
1. The Incredible Life of Walter Mitty.
“To see the world around, to know its dangers, to look through walls, to find each other, to become closer, to feel - this is the purpose of life.”
A story about how even the most incredible dreams of a “little man” can be turned into reality if you decide to take the first step towards life.
2. Eat, Pray, Love.
Methods of personality development: biography of great people
Studying the biographies of historical figures and contemporaries helps not only to identify the patterns that led them to success. In many cases, this method gives a charge of motivation, an example of courage and perseverance in any life circumstances. Every person has fear within them at the genetic level.
It is needed in order to protect a person from inevitable death every time. People no longer live in caves, and their lives no longer hang in the balance depending on the decisions of the community. But fears of all kinds - from phobias to social fears - sit deep in every person. All methods of personality development, one way or another, have as their goal overcoming inappropriate fear in a person.
It can be difficult for the modern generation to understand that the habit of heroism can be trained. Samurai, scientists burned for the truth - they all appear before us like shadows of the past. But history has thousands of examples of human heroism. Studying the biographies of both successful people and historical heroes is a powerful method that will allow you to look at life from a slightly different perspective. After all, for the majority, heroism is a gift that is given to a few. Not every artist becomes Raphael, and not every scientist becomes Einstein. Only a few athletes become champions.
But it’s worth studying the biographies of great people in more detail, and it turns out that leadership, intellectual development of the individual, and heroism are the work of ordinary people of flesh and blood. “It was not the gods who fired the pots,” said the ancient Greeks. Consider, for example, the inspiring story of Podolsk cadets - an example of the greatest feat, the result of which was the salvation of the Russian capital from the fascist invaders.
Take time to think
We are convinced that we know what is good and what is bad, what human behavior is correct, what well-being is, what success means, what happiness means, how to become happy...
To reflect is to delve deeply into something, that is, to really think about it and pose a certain question. We live as if we already know the answers to all questions.
We all live by certain principles, don't we? We are all in a constant search for the same thing - comfort, that is, a state of mind when we feel a stable feeling of happiness, craving for the unknown, excitement and love.
Don't you find it interesting that most of the people who come our way, including ourselves, do not feel the satisfaction (evaluate your level of satisfaction with life) that everyone usually strives for? Have you ever wondered why this is so?
If we don't take the time to really think about these questions, we'll never get to them, and we should start doing it soon.
As soon as we open our eyes in the morning, our mind and attention are already filled with the things we must do throughout the day. Our day begins with us literally accepting our responsibilities.
Taking the time to simply ask yourself where you are going and whether you will end up where you want to go is the most important thing you can do for yourself.
What is self-development worth without knowing where your desire to improve comes from and how it will affect the quality of your life?
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